Odin’s Eye – Christianity Problems – The Resurrection and Eyewitness Reliability

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

I suppose a disclaimer is in order.  I am writing this post as test pilot of the kind of things I could probably put in a book as an ex-believer, former pastor, bible scholar and theologian.  The kind of things that would cause many Christians to say: “That’s sad, I will pray for you.”  Spare me, I have a better plan for you. Read this post and tell me where I am wrong.  The point is I could write a book (and may do so) about the problems with the life of Jesus Nazareth, this would only represent what would probably be one section of a chapter. There is definitely many more things I could say.

Nobody likes death or the idea of ceasing to exist. Nobody.  In large part I think this is why every major religion has an afterlife story. In Christianity an eschatology of where people go after they die. We want to believe that we go on and so we create religions to say when, how and why we would go on. None of this has any real verification as no one has really come back from the dead to tell us the reality of what is after death. Well, unless you can prove Jesus of Nazareth actually did so.

For four decades I believed he had.  It is this central belief on which all of Christianity lives or dies.  Even the Bible understands this as in 1 Corinthians 15 it is very boldly stated that if Jesus did not rise from the dead, then the Christian faith is vain. Everything in Christianity hinges on the resurrection being true.

For years I was therefore a faithful apologist of the resurrection.  I understood the stakes. Without this event, my faith was nonsense.  Today; when it comes down to it, I have more doubts now than belief. For a long time I hinged my faith that the eyewitnesses were telling the truth. They may well have thought they were telling the truth, but were they actually reliable witnesses or subject to the same problems that plague all eyewitness accounts?

Here is the problem – everything that we know about the resurrection is based on eyewitness testimony, and it has been proven that eyewitness testimony is unreliable at best. Then you have the fact that such testimony was not solicited for being permanently written down for many years after the fact. Even by conservative christian scholarship there is a gap of twenty years between the events and the first gospel. That’s a long time for the eyewitnesses to get their story straight and they still don’t pull it off.

Eyewitness testimony has the following problems: https://www.simplypsychology.org/eyewitness-testimony.html

  1. Stress / Anxiety – Stress level can have a negative impact on memory.  Depending on the nature of the stress.  While people can remember aspects of events involving weapons very well, they forget others more readily if experiencing personal stress because their personal stress level is very highly distracting to their focus.
  2. Reconstructive Memory.  In memory recall we DO NOT remember things like a video tape.  In reality there is a lot of interpretive action in memory and we remember the gist of the event to the value judgment we placed on it more than the events. We store the information in the way that makes most sense to us. Because this is very cultural and societal it can be full of prejudice and bias. This is reflected in the fact that as people change their values, the memories change in how they are recalled. We reconstruct memories in a way that reflects our belief in the nature of the world.
  3. Weapon Focus – The funny thing about having a weapon pointed at you is that you remember the weapon and nothing else around it.  You might ask how this applies, well when you get focused on one thing you are seeing the other things tend to get blurry.  So the question comes – was the sight of an open tomb an object focus?
  4. Leading Questions – this is normally an issue with legal matters in testimony, but in the case of the gospels the claim is made that the writers of the gospels were interviewing eyewitnesses – did they during such interviews ask leading questions?

So, the question then becomes how accurate is any account, even four of them, when all those accounts are based entirely of eyewitness testimony many years after the fact?  There is a high probability that a large amount of the second problem entered into the accounts as the disciples interpreted the events according to their values and beliefs in the world.  The believed in miracles and they wanted Jesus to be alive.

I could argue that the whole thing might be made up.  But let’s for the sake of this argument say that on resurrection morning the disciples did indeed see something and the interpreted that as Jesus of Nazareth risen from the dead. Let’s assume that their gospels are the eyewitness testimony they claim to be and see what problems could be there.  Let’s assume thy are not being deliberately deceptive, but perhaps misjudged what they saw.

  1. Stress /Anxiety – the disciples would have been under a great deal of stress that would have affected their memory. They were mourning and were by their own accounts in fear of the religious leaders. In the case of the women who first went to the tomb grieving and distraught.  When they arrive at the tomb, it is empty, the guards are gone and there is no body.  Interpretation, because they wanted it to be true – so badly to be true – Jesus rose from the dead.
  2. Reconstructive Memory – this is the big problem. The gospels themselves when it comes to the resurrection accounts are varied and quite frankly at times contradictory.  I am not saying there was a conspiracy to defraud but an atmosphere of want the story to be true to the point that accounts of seeing Jesus alive were probably everywhere. The gospels themselves provide evidence for reconstructive memory.  Mark stops after saying the resurrection took place, the longer version being a clear addition.  No events are actually recorded so you are left with the oral stories floating around.  Matthew and Luke record the events but they don’t agree on some details.  Like who saw Jesus first as far as who was in the group of women. Both of them record Peter being the first to reach the tomb with no second witness.  John says ‘no the way it happened was I was there and I outran Peter to the tomb.’  This lack of continuity in the accounts is a direct refection of not only that memories of the resurrection are being reconstructed, but the stories are told differently to reflect each gospels writer’s own interpretations of those memories; whether their own or the testimony of others.  Worse yet, if we follow even conservative scholarship on the dates of the gospels – we get a gap of time of at least two to three decades where interpretation of bias have influenced those memories over time.  Cementing the values with the memories and altering those memories.
  3. Weapon/Object Focus: If the disciples find the tomb empty, that tomb would become the object focus of the discussion. They would focus on it and try to explain it.  They many to choose from, but their founder Jesus of Nazareth told them he was going to rise from the dead.  They wanted that to be true very badly so the empty tomb becomes – Jesus rose from the dead like he said.  Later when the accounts are being written, ‘angels’ make that statement, and memories reconstructed with additions and changes.
  4. Leading Questions: The problem here is that when the gospel writers are doing their research; they being believers talking to believers would have the high possibility of doing two things.  1) Asking questions that basically assume the story is true looking for confirmation, not honest inquiry and 2) asking softball questions that are leading to get the story they want.  No author of the gospels is a skeptic but rather they assume the story is true and there is no other account but theirs anywhere.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

Was this eyewitness thing  the death nail to my faith.  No, but it has raised more doubt than faith that Jesus of Nazareth rose from the dead,  Why?  Because it is highly feasible that with the high expectations or need for comfort, that people made the story up because of wanting something to have faith in. My best example of this is Mary Magdalene seeing Christ after the other ladies leave. She is very distraught (Stress), she is focused on the empty tomb (object focus) and she sees what she perceives is the gardener and then ‘discovers’ it is Jesus (reconstructive memory?). When you add the problem of that no one but Mary experienced this with no other witnesses, it is highly like people who see aliens when they are alone.  With no collaboration, you really have to dismiss the story.  I have more doubts than faith anymore because most stories of seeing the resurrected Christ have these problems.

Religion:

In the end it was my religion and profession that kept me at it, but the doubts kept getting bigger.  This issue of eyewitness testimony actually came up in my Easter sermons because I was wrestling with it.  The more I wrestled with it and looked at the gospel accounts, the more I realize these problems were very possible and that either many of the stories either had no collaboration, no outside collaboration or the witnesses were not named and thus could not be followed up on.

Theology:

If there is any part of the theology I wrestle with it is life after death and its relationship to giving life meaning. Paul’s argument in 1 Corinthians 15 is that the only meaning to life would be ‘eat and drink for tomorrow we die.  But I would argue that philosophers have taken on that point and have done so somewhat successfully.  Don’t get me wrong, their answers aren’t perfect, but they are there to be considered.

Spirituality:

I think most of us deists still cling a little to the possibility of life after death. The possibility that the universe has a grand purpose created by a designer.  That said we are very interested in spirituality that reflects reality.  We want something deeper that is real not the result of flaws in human reasoning and observation.  For me this basically means I place more emphasis on enjoying and living a good life now, because life after death is a true unknown and not something I want to focus my spiritual life on, especially if it turns out that it doesn’t exist.

Conclusion:

Well, I hope you enjoyed this little test pilot of what kinds of things I could write if I was so inclined.  The real issue I wrestle with is truth, how much more important is truth to the value I place on fidelity and respect of others.  I have to think on it more, Because the Life of Christ would be a great topic for me given my education and experience, the problem would be most of my family and friends might disown me or at the very least find it awkward to invite me to family gatherings at Christmas and Easter.  I will have to meditate on it more.

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – The Book of Rabyd 2:3 – “Whenever You Find Yourself on the Side of the Majority, it is Time to Pause and Reflect.”

 

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements: 

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: “No Rest for the Wicked” – Godsmack

No real official video for this song, but here is the lyric one so you can sing along.

Poem: “Salt in My Wounds” by Edward W, Raby, Sr. – Written April 13, 2019

See the source image

 

Once you were the spice of my life,

You kept me from spoiling

You were the flavor I needed

You made life less plain

 

Then you left me

laying in a pool of my own blood.

Leaving a wound

a void from your knife

 

Now memories of you are salty

Burning as they are applied to the scar

Salt in my wound

Preserving the pain.

 

-Ed Raby – April 13, 2019-

 

Without a doubt this was the easiest poem I have ever written.  At least as far as time and feeling are concerned. Took me literally just five minutes.  It’s still rough, but I suspect it will be Grey Wayfarer canonized very soon. 

Miss Salty, as I called her, helped me through a lot.  She is definitely wiser and smarter than her years would say.  But this whole thing in reflection was a doomed voyage like the Titanic. Right now memories of this whole thing are bitter-sweet. Salty like she was.  They hurt and yet I hope they bring about some cleansing like salt removing infection.

Meditation:

 

Image may contain: 1 person, text

Yep, which is why I don’t trust either party. The Wall for the right and Rich Wall Street on the left are not real threat in my opinion.  Mostly fear mongering using a supposed noble cause to seize power.

Song of Preparation:  “Cult of Personality” – Living Colour

I once heard these guys live via radio.  The guy who was announcing made the remark that they were the loudest band he ever heard in concert. Good intro.

Text:

“Whenever You Find Yourself on the Side of the Majority, it is Time to Pause and Reflect.” – The Book Of Rabyd 2:3

Sermon:

This time through The Book of Rabyd, I am trying to quote as many different people as I can.  Mark Twain was pretty much destined to be on this list and it was only a matter of time.  This is my favorite quote from him and is truly a principle of wisdom.

Tribalism is inherent in the human species.  Survival trait. We band together to take on common threats and deal with common problems. The issue is that it can also lead to a mob mentality. It can lead to just bowing down to the culture, group think or what everyone’s opinion is.

This quote is a regular reminder to all of us who prefer reason to mindless pandering.  The issue is to take action on what makes sense and is most reasonable and this quote reminds us there is nothing inherently reasonable about the majority.  The only quality they have is more numbers. The majority is not proof of truth or rightness.

For me there is a reminder here that I am both a free citizen and a responsible citizen. Free because on thing that can enslave is tribalism and cults of personality. Responsible, because from time to time you need to be the thinking one that calls into question the actions of the mob.

There are institutions that thrive on this tribalism but they can, in my humble opinion be boiled down to two things – government and religion.  Both of these tap into people’s passions rather than their reason and thus are manipulative by nature. They tap into people’s inherent tribalism and mob mentality to get actions people think are the right thing but are actually the desires of those who would seek power either through politics or faith.

The lesson then is never let your loyalty to the group outweigh your loyalty to yourself and your principles. Something I hope gets carried on by those who I call my family is the ability to question anything and everything, even if the majority thinks it is the best course.  I would rather have my descendents known for being rebels and original thinkers that people who just went along with the crowd and the mob.  That they would be people of Courage, Self-Reliance and Truth

Closing Song: “Of Wolf and Man” – Metallica

I am thinking of making this my personal theme song. A lesser known work of Metallica but still one of their best.

Parting Thought:

Image may contain: text

Stay strong pagans. Keep going.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – Humanism – Morality and Religion

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

Humanists as a general rule, dismiss the need for religion to be moral. Humanists for the most part simply see that anyone can act ethically and morality if they simply tap into their humanity. That is act on their better nature as human beings. I concur with this.

There is some thoughts that to be a humanist you have to be atheist, but I reject that as well. I think in large part those we call founding fathers were also humanists of a deist variety and I am as well.  I don’t dismiss the idea of creator or creators, I just don’t think that, whomever they may be, has any vested interest in policing our morals.  That’s up to us to define as the creators, if they exist, have left questions of morality and ethics to us.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

Faith never cured me of being a dick. Not once did my faith in Christ lead to a better morality.  That choice was always my own. I would say also that I have seen the concept of ‘faith’ used for great evil as old ladies send parts of their social security checks to preachers on television who promise prosperity through giving.  All the while the prosperity comes to them at the old ladies’ expense. Greed justified through ‘faith’ is an old story, and one of the great proofs that religion is no guarantee of morality. Far from it.  You can also add people wracked with guilt because they were sick and that was because they didn’t have enough ‘faith’.

Religion:

I have watched in my own ministry as religion has been used to justify unethical and immoral things:

  1. Because of the Christian notion of submission of wives to husbands, I saw sexual, physical, emotional and mental abuse perpetrated by men toward their wives.
  2. Because of the notion of ‘seed faith’ I saw greed justified as people would plant their seed but the preacher would harvest.
  3. I saw harsh religious judgment as people would literally throw off good friends and even family members simply because they did not believe as they did or left the faith. This one I have recently personally experienced.  I used to have 370 or so Facebook friends.  I cut myself off from a mere 80 or so but now I have 205.  That’s 85 people who simply dropped me after I announced I wasn’t a Christian anymore.  Nice.
  4. I have watched people who, believing the end of the world was coming, ran up their credit cards and quit good jobs to be come reclusive only to find themselves in serious trouble afterwards.  This is the best example I can come up with of stupid behavior caused by religion, but I could list so many I might have the content for a book in and of itself.

That’s just my experience, historically speaking Christianity has the one problem every religion has, a creation of an ‘us’ verses ‘them’ mentality that leads to taking actions against them to justify exaltation of us.  It gets worse when you consider some theologies.

Theology:

Historically speaking Christianity has not had a good moral track record.

  1. The Catholics killed, raped, tortured, etc. people who left the faith.  They branded anyone different who did not hold their faith and punished them accordingly.  The repressed any genuine scientific and philosophical pursuit if it contradicted the teachings of the church.  The Spanish Inquisition wasn’t an anomaly, it was normal operating procedure for the Catholic church.
  2. The Protestant Church was no better.  I would say that the Western expansion into Native American territory and the genocide of indigenous population in the United States was largely due to the Calvinist religious belief held highly at the time of manifest destiny encouraged by the notion of Predestination.  You don’t have to treat people as equals or human, if you view them as predestined for hell.
  3. Regardless of stripe, the moral codes of Christianity are probably responsible for more emotional, mental and other forms of abuse.  Shame and guilt due to imaginary problems that force human beings to act against their nature lead to depression and low self-esteem which preachers exploit.  In some cases, people have committed suicide rather than face the fact they can’t live up to the code placed upon them.
  4. Cultist behavior is present in Christianity and all religions.  I love it when Christians try to differentiate themselves from what they perceive to be cults.  Mostly they will say they don’t try to control people’s sexuality or money.  So what then of this sins of sexuality list and the doctrine of tithing?  Religions all have cult behavior. All of them.

Spirituality:

For me I think I live by two notions: 1) I don’t need religion to be spiritual and 2) I don’t need religion to be moral. Spirituality and ethics are found in ourselves, in our humanity. Religions tap into that, but they twist it to their own purpose. They find ways to interpret the rules to slide through a side door into greed, lust and all the other seven deadly ‘sins’.  It’s a game of moral “I am better than you.” – not spirituality.

Conclusion:

“Do no harm” and “Treat others as you would want to be treated” in some form appear in every religion.  The problem is I can say both of these and not be religious.  It is the strongest indicator that Christopher Hitchens was right, that morality comes from simply being human, but religions steal that notion and then add their own so that certain groups of people gain and others lose. There is nothing moral about that and to pretend there is, well, that is just indoctrination talking.  Sorry, spent too much time as a religious person to not know that is true.

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens – Love: Mutual Essential Happiness

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

I know I used a Robert Heinlein quote for the Pagan Pulpit this week, but I suppose it is also fitting that he comes up here, as love is the philosophical topic this week. Love for Heinlein was the idea that in order to be happy another person you cared for also had to be happy.  When both sides are concerned at this level with each others happiness, then love is there.

I feel the same trepidation in talking about Love as I do Fidelity.  I have never really grasped or been good at this love thing. Mostly because I am a little bit of a hopeless romantic when it comes to love. I have high ideals about it. I have discovered however that ‘love’ is not thought of as highly by others as myself. People use the word ‘love’ so often and so frequently it loses its meaning.

I find with love I represent the blundering idiot more than the person who understands it on a practical level.  Because of this, when love is lost by any cause, it hurts me – badly. It is in times like those that I find myself wishing my heart could be ripped out of my chest and removed all together.  Every time there has been that early struggle to just shut down all emotions completely and forever.  To go completely cold-blooded bastard, so I don’t have to be concerned with anyone’s happiness but my own.  But in the end the risk of love is far outweighed by the joys of it. At least when I find those joys.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

I need love.  We all do.  As introverted and reclusive as I am, I find the need to feel that someone loves me.  I can face a whole day by myself and be happy with it, if I know someone loves me. I struggle with that though because my definition of love is so very high. My standards and expectations of love I receive is the same as I give to them.  If I am ‘all in’ with a person, I expect that in return and I need that to be true.

I need different kinds of love.  I need friendship, family love and the one I will be using the most in this post – love of the deepest nature with another human being.  In my case as a heterosexual male – love with a woman. It’s the love I need the most.

Wants (Freki):

I want love.  It has a lot of side benefits. For me, I find The Grey has no place in love. It isn’t there or does not affect me at all.  Love is the sunshine I keep in my heart where I smile even if the clouds are over me.  I can smile because the Grey has no power when I can feel that I am loved. When I know I am loved.  It is a want that is very strong, but it also makes me not think about what’s going on as much.

Reason (Huginn):

The wolves of love are easy.  The reason behind it is much harder. I have loved and lost several times both is romance and friendship.  Two times romantically were greatly significant to the point they were personally devastating.  I wrestle with the fact that I was ‘all in’ with these two women but it is clear by their actions, they were not.  It is hard when that other person’s happiness is so essential for your own, but then you come to the devastating realization that their happiness is not conditional on yours.  That takes some time to get over.

There is also trying to rebuild love. Yes, it is a real thing. Where history causes you to doubt love.   So you say it to each other multiple times every day, when you are alone you go through the box of all the notes she has sent you where she has written ‘I love you’.  You cuddle and kiss and make love and that phrase ‘make love’ has a whole new meaning because that is exactly what you are doing.  It isn’t about sex as much as making love.  To build it and surrounded it with wall and protect it.  It’s hard when you look at the damage at times, and see it is you who destroyed that part, and now you have to fix it. It is far easier to destroy than to build and that is especially true for love.

Wisdom (Muninn):

If experience makes one wiser, I can say for me love seems to be an exception to that rule. I find with love reason and wisdom seem to have little place. They probably should, but in truth we all seem to shoo the ravens away to follow our wolves of need and want. I can say that I am wise enough to really guard myself these days.  Despite my desires, I keep myself limited in who I love and why. I just know, if I am hurting I try to grasp love from somewhere and if the pain is high enough wisdom and reason are very hard to find. So, I try to deal with reducing the pain to stay in fidelity.

I suppose that is why when it comes to love I see that honor, courage and standing for truth are good emotional states as well as virtues.  Strong ones. They help with understanding love and keeping on the path despite my pain about it.  At the same time, it is this continued search for love that keeps me wandering and searching.

Conclusion:

Love is a funny thing.  It can scar you when you are the one concerned with someone else’s happiness, but they are not as concerned with yours.  But it also can bring joy, healing and strength when it is.  I don’t know if have really said much here.  I know there is a lot of emotion behind my words in this post today, but whether my philosophy behind love as a higher virtue is good I have no clue.  I am still learning.  As I said, I am a blundering idiot at times with love. But I keep walking trying to understand it.  I keep walking hoping to find the sunshine of love to keep my heart free from The Grey.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – Bible Problems: The Four Gospels

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

Another one of those posts where what I taught in the past about the Bible is going to have some of the problems I will now reveil. Problems I discovered that are a little overwhelming to maintaining faith. I am actually going to take on one of the more solid parts of the Bible – where we actually have four witnesses of events which would seem to fulfill the Bibles’s own standard of ‘two or three” plus one. However as we will see, this doesn’t’ a) solve other problems and b) some of the events witnessed still only have one witness.

The gospels actually illustrate some Bible problems so well that they provide an excellent test case for critics. I mean if you can have four witnesses, and still present something that makes you scratch your head, then anything less than that obviously is worse.

  1. The gospels are contradictory – This is particularly true when it comes to the resurrection accounts.  Some gospels really have no account at all.  Mark doesn’t have anything other than a statement that Jesus rose from the dead.  The longer ending is probably an addition from someone regurgitating a story and not someone who was an eyewitness. Even when there is a claim to being eyewitnesses they can’t seem to get their story straight. Despite the claim to the contrary, this does not validate the story, it is what in court would be contradictory testimony.  It would be thrown out, but gospel apologists continue to make the leap (this not being able to get their story straight) means the gospels are actually more authentic. No, quite the opposite in fact. It means there was a lot of confusion ‘resurrection’ morning and in moments of confusion any story can be both fabricated and  propagated.
  2. The gospels also suffer from confirmation bias. Every writer of each gospel clearly wants the story to be true, and thus does not offer critical analysis of many events that are presented in the Life of Christ. In my opinion, this is the main atmosphere on ‘resurrection’ morning.  A desire that Jesus of Nazareth was alive so strong that it created and atmosphere of mass psychological collusion. Before you think that couldn’t be possible, I remind people of Jim Jones and Jones Town and Heaven’s Gate, events that show that human beings can desire something so badly they will not look critically at what they are being told,  Based on these false beleifs they will in fact kill themselves and be martyred for it; if they believe it strongly enough regardless of whether it is true or a lie.
  3. Timeline issues – yeah, I am stuck on the resurrection again because it was one of the problems I faced regularly in teaching the event. The accounts vary in their timeline and even events are presented differently to the point that they contradict each other in order of events. Who saw Jesus before someone else is a regular problem.  Throughout the gospels some things appear in different order.  Not a deal breaker but one of those ‘ keeping a straight story’ issues.
  4. Historically speaking if you are looking for other biographies or historical accounts of Jesus of Nazareth, you will disappointed.  The only accounts we have are from his disciples and they biased. There is no objective historical account of his life,  There are mentions in other sources like Philo and Josephus but all they really prove is that Christianity is indeed something that stretches back to the first century, but Jesus himself and his life is untouched by these sources. .
  5. The two or three witness problem still persists despite their being four accounts.  Why? 1) The Gospel of John stands alone in many accounts. It offers up events that don’t have any collaboration at all. Even from the other gospels. John literally stands alone in his accounts of things at times and thus does not met the Bible’s own standard of ‘two or three witnesses’ for those events. 2) The other gospels clearly either copied each other or a common account.  I have no problem with this historically speak except sometimes the word choice is verbatim which means they didn’t do much more digging than to copy without further investigation.  There many theories to this, but in the end what you have is the possibility that instead of three accounts from three different witnesses, what you get is one account of these events, which are not collaborated, and simply copied by others.  When they do differ, Matthew, Mark and Luke have the same problem as John.  They often stand alone with many stories.  One gospel writer will present one story, but the other two leave it out. This happens a lot and in the end you get very few stories that all four gospel writers actually touch.  The only miracle they touch is the Feeding of the Five Thousand and it looks like John is trying to correct the account of the other three.  The rest mostly deal with Jesus’ time in Jerusalem before he was crucified. That he had triumphal entry, he held a last supper where he said he would be betrayed, etc. But all goes south at the resurrection where things get completely contradictory or confusing.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

As a student of the Bible, what faith I have left in the Bible is an interesting thing and the gospels in particular.  I taught Life of Christ at least ten times in my ministry.  I think you can reasonably say that Jesus of Nazareth was probably a real person and that he indeed was a Jewish Rabbi, and probably a controversial one to the point he was hated by the other rabbis, religious teachers and groups.  The gospels are a reflection of that but are written by his followers. So how do you continue to follow the teachings of  a rabbi the others have decried as a heretic?  You present Jesus of Nazareth as the Messiah and add a whole lot of legend to the real man, so that it makes the people who killed him look like complete assholes.  The gospels may very well be a reflection of reactionary activity. Like Paul Bunyan or John Henry who may have been real people but their legend got big to the point of being ridiculous; Jesus of Nazareth suddenly becomes much more than he really was to justify Christianity’s existence and growth. I have faith that human beings may want to believe something so badly, they will lie to themselves and create stories to make their experiences change in their mind to verify the new presented ‘truth’.

Religion:

Christianity itself developed a problem of having so many accounts of Jesus life that were so contradictory, they convened a council of the church to sort it out.  This has led to the question: the criteria used may simply been one way of one group trying to politically eliminate another. The criteria were created by men for men’s purposes.  The gospels chosen in the end may simply been the least contradictory, but still not perfect by any stretch of the imagination.  Religion then has a vested interest in defending its ‘holy’ book so they cannot be questioned and ‘BAM!’ – two thousand years later, they still stand despite all the problems.  Not because they are the truth or history, but they have become religious tradition further defended by doctrine and dogma.

Theology:

I suppose I have no Messianic Theology anymore.  I was asked once recently if I had renounced Christ.  I shrugged, is there anything to renounce? I mean I don’t see the need for humanity to have a messiah figure.  In fact I would say looking for one or needing one is a cop-out trying to look for someone else to come along like a white knight and save you from all your problems. My Christology these days might simply be non-existent. Not renounced, just faded out of existence as no longer needed. Jesus was either a great teacher that people either added to his story to the point it is just as unlikely as other tall tales, or he was a lunatic who people believed so strongly they made stuff up to reinforce their belief in a lunatic.  Was he the Messiah? – My answer: do we need one?  Was He Lord? Once again do I need one?

Spirituality:

I like some of the teachings of Jesus.  I find them spiritually uplifting as I consider them. That said, I would also say I can treat them with the same attitude I treat the teachings of Buddha, Confucius and other great and deep thinkers.  Containers for truth, but not THE truth.  Just human beings that said some wise words and I find spirituality in a lot of people’s words beyond the standard religious figures.  It is the one way we live on I suppose – the wisdom that can be found in words we wrote or spoke.

Events are a different matter. I don’t find spirituality in events I didn’t personally experience anymore.  I can find inspiration in tales of courage, honor and other stories where virtues are center, but my spirituality is my own experiences in life, my own study and my own vision for myself..

Conclusion:

I would say my path has taken a very honest turn.  You can’t create a special group of ideas or books and then say you will not criticize them and then claim to be objective.  The gospels are ancient writings, that when we subject them to the same scrutiny as many other writings of antiquity, fall short in many areas. This is simply true.  They are religious tradition protected by religious dogma that once ripped away, you find a much more difficult truth. They are perhaps a mixture of true stories about Jesus of Nazareth mixed with tall tales.  They are very possibly fabricated stories with an agenda that has nothing to do with the real man Jesus of Nazareth.

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – The Book of Rabyd 2:1 – “People are Stupid”

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements: 

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: ‘Radio Ga Ga’ – Queen (Live at Wembly London 1985)

I don’t really need to explain why I open with Queen sometimes do I?

Poem: “We all eat lies” – Dark and Twisted

No photo description available.

Meditation:

Image may contain: one or more people and text

Hard to find the right people.   Why? Because as we will see today – stupidity.

Song of Preparation:  ‘Vengeful One’ – Disturbed

The greatest thing that proves people are stupid is that they believe the media most of the time.  The media knows full well that people are stupid and take advantage of that all the time. They feed people’s’ confirmation bias and into cognitive dissonance all the time.

Text:

‘People are Stupid’ – The Book of Rabyd 2:1

Sermon:

We are with verse one of chapter two moving into a different realm of The Book of Rabyd.  Chapter one is principles I would say are universally or nearly universally true.  Chapter Two is points of wisdom which are more about life guides and coming to a better understanding of the world.  Not hard fast rules in chapter two, but definitely can be seen to be true most of the time.  We start with the simple three word Phrase: “People are Stupid”

One might say this is a pretty pessimistic view of people in general. This is not a statement about people and their morality however, just their nature. Terry Goodkind and his Wizard’s Rules impressed me in their quick way of getting to human nature and laying it out there plainly and bluntly.  I like someone who can take a concept and put it into a simple statement and “People are Stupid” shocks you ,and yet catches your attention, because you know in you heart it is true.  I have tried to put this idea into other terms or phraseology but it never has the force of “People are Stupid.”

Terry Goodkind though really doesn’t stop with just these three words. but in his book Wizard’s First Rule he makes several other points about it:

  1. Given proper motivation people will believe almost anything.
  2. People will believe something because they want it to be true or fear it is true. (Confirmation Bias)
  3. Peoples’s heads are full of things that they think is true but is in reality mostly false. (Cognitive Dissonance)
  4. People rarely can tell the difference between a lie and the truth, but they think they can. (Ego)
  5. Because of all this people are easier to fool.

You will note Terry did not say ALL People are stupid.  His assumption is that by understanding this rule you can rise above it yourself.  First you understand it for yourself that you yourself are stupid.  Once you get this idea that you are stupid and need analyze your own thinking and beliefs for whether or not they are true, then you are very much on the path to understanding yourself and others better.  Stupidity is part of being a human being and once you get that part, the rest of the wisdom that flows from this foundation becomes easier to swallow.  Truth is found in understanding that even you can be subject to stupidity and that means re-thinking things regularly to make sure you are basing your understandings on the truth, and not just what you want to be the truth.

There is tremendous power that you gain when you understand all of this and the challenge for the vitreous person is to not take advantage of it for malevolent purposes.  It gives you an advantage when you realize what makes people, stupid including yourself is Confirmation Bias, Cognitive Dissonance, and Ego. You can use this to help or harm.  lead people to truth to a lie.  Motivate them to great good or evil.

As a leader over the years’, I have come to realize the difficulty of researching and coming to know the factual truth at times, but knowing full well that to motivate people to act on it, requires a great deal of tapping into people’s ‘stupidity’.  Otherwise they will never be motivated to act.  Truth rarely motivates, passion does.  That is the challenge to be motivated by truth as a leader but tap into people’s passions so you don’t on the one hand mislead people, but on the other hand get them to act.

We may see Terry Goodkind again.  I am revising a lot of these points of wisdom and combining some of them so we will see.  However many of the Wizard’s Rules echo in a lot of them.

Closing Song: ‘Holy Diver’ – Dio

Parting Thought:

Image may contain: 1 person, standing and text

You are sovereign over your life.  Never forget that.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – My Spiritual Rebuilding

 

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

I am taking a break from the order to think a little bit about some things.  This last week of March has definitely been about making my Realignment of Virtues with their respective principles, goals and bucket list item.   I will be engaged in this until Saturn’s Day and then on March 31st the new stuff kicks off in full.  Not having the time to do some proper research for the Bible Problems post that is supposed to fall this week, I decided to talk about something more spiritual and personal instead.

The people in my life do not understand the change of my beliefs and some of them are the closest to me.  To them this change has been sudden and only now are some of them starting to get used to the idea but they still don’t understand it. Trying to rebuild one’s spirituality in this environment is not difficult, just often misunderstood because to others it was sudden but to me it has been long in coming.  This is a decision I agonized over for a long time. One that has placed me in a position of rebuilding my spirituality after taking a sledgehammer (metaphorically speaking) to what i had built during my time as a Christian.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

I consider myself a spiritual person still.  There is part of humanity that one cannot put into a purely rational box no matter how much you try.   The thing I have thrown off is religion.  I have however not thrown off ‘faith’.  Like it or not everyone has faith is something. Something they cannot rationally prove but still live their life by.  Atheists deny this but if they were to go through their philosophy and principles they live by my guess is somewhere they would have to admit they go forward with without any proof – yet. They would contend they believe proof will be found eventually but it just hasn’t been found yet.  That’s faith no matter how much you shake and dance.

I am not going to deny I have faith in stuff I can’t prove.  I recognize my ignorance and ignorance is going to lead to some things you are going to take on faith because you have no choice or the alternative is to simply exist without progress.  I take that there is a part of human beings that is spiritual on faith, because I cannot see a scientific or rational answer for some things – yet.

Religion:

The one thing I have discarded is religion.  I recognize two forces that pass themselves off as good but are in reality evil as fuck. Government and Religion. With government I recognize there is a necessary evil that must be engaged because people are inherently tribal.  Religion I can’t find to many uses for anymore. It is by its nature, controlling and manipulative. It sells you something that you don’t even need to solve a problem you don’t actually have. It has all the morality of the huckster selling snake oil and has the same objective.

It disguises greed, lust and manipulation as industry, love and care.  It calls you to dwell in ignorance so you can preserve your faith. Never question things because if you did you might realize the ‘holy men’ are taking you for a ride. Cleaver, as perhaps if you lose your ignorance you might see that it is harming you far more than helping you. I refuse to engage a system of belief anymore that sees to tell me what THE TRUTH is; as I find, truth is not something that is always easy to find or black and white anymore. I have no use for religion in rebuilding my spirituality, as it is probably is in reality one of the most spiritually destructive forces there is.

Theology:

Whatever the divine might be, I now reserve the right to question its justice, mercy or decisions. I think the Norse attitude toward the gods is probably mine.  The Norse gods are not interested in worship.  They are interested in a life well lived.  Mans approach to them is not to fawn or fall on one’s knees, but to stand bravely.  They don’t want the devotion, but just respect for their power.  Theologically, it seems if the divine is our parent, like a good parent it would want us to grow up and stand on our own and teach our descendants to do the same.

Spirituality:

This last year has been both a cubicle and a flood of challenges. I am starting to put some of the things I did last year at this time in the category of ‘more than a year ago’.  By the time summer is over all of it will be there. This flood and fire I have been going through has cause the storm to rage at times and my scars to burn with pain; but in all of that, I feel like I am being reborn.  I am becoming something greater than I was, something stronger.  I no longer bow, I stand.  I no longer need the crutch that is religion and I am done with its snake oil spirituality.

Conclusion:

 

I used to be a tiger and lion person.  Strong animal images but both perform in the circus. But these days the wolves and ravens are more my speed. Not as strong but wild and free. You can put thme in cages but they will never be tame. I find that both light and darkness are not to be feared but used.  I feed both wolves (Need and Want) and both ravens (Reason and Wisdom). I no longer see myself as sinner or saint – just a man rebuilding and discovering his true self. In that I find my spiritual rebirth and growth.  I am Grey.  An old scared grey wolf if you will.  I have a pack but it is small, but then again I know what I bring to the table, so I am not afraid to fight or eat alone either.

Image may contain: text

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and The Wayfarer – Part 8 – “I’m OK” and What that Means

Happy Tyr’s Day

I have a Of Wolves and Ravens post in the incubator but I am so focused on the realignment I am doing that I don’t want to rush it and fuck it up have it not be as good as it could be. I will post it next week but this week I have the time and the emotional state where writing The Grey and the Wayfarer’s latest installment.

“I’m OK.”

If anyone has ever dealt with depression or someone who thy love who is depressed; you know this two-word phrase (when people ask how you or they are) is one of the most challenging to decipher.  Sometimes the person is genuinely OK and they are telling you that.  Other times the non-verbal cues would tell you otherwise and you should listen to them and not the words.  Non-verbal communication rarely lies.  If you’re talking on the phone with someone with depression, you really have to rely on tone of voice, losing the non-verbal by not looking at them leaves you in the dark a lot.

There are probably two people in the world right now that will notice a short pause before I answer them when they ask – “How are you?”  That’s because with them, I have made a commitment to be absolutely honest.  That pause is me giving my soul a quick look and asking what the truth is.  If I say “I’m OK” to them, it true.  Everyone else, it’s not that I don’t trust you it’s…..  Well, I hope you understand.

That said, even when I say ‘I’m OK’ and am truthful about it, what does that mean? Well, I am not great.  I am also not depressed.  It’s really a state of emotional functionality.  I am broken but I can function. I can actually do pretty well, it is just I feel at times I am just marking time from one thing to the next.  Just existing.  I feel emotions, but it is a low-level emotion that is a combination at times of sadness/ joy and pain/triumph.  The best way to describe it is that my emotional lights flicker.  It’s like spring or fall between the seasons. It’s like the electrical system of my emotions has a short in it.

Doesn’t mean there is something wrong, but nothing is right either. ‘I’m OK’ is probably the best way to put it.

The cause of this is not so much I am wired wrong.  Probably the opposite actually.  I am highly wired and hard-wired and so like all things complicated – things go wrong easily and frequently:

1) I am emphatic.  I pick up people’s emotions and I find myself feeling what they feel.  You think that is great?  Try being a pastor for twenty years dealing with everyone shit negative emotional states all the time.  It’s drives you to introversion, trust me.

2) I don’t stop thinking.  From the moment I wake up until I go to bed, my mind is working. It’s fine when I have a problem to solve or something to think about.  It’s when I am bored or there is nothing to do that this really begins to lead you down some dark lines of thinking.

3) I have a near photographic memory for verbal conversations.  It’s contextual thankfully. I have to be in the place or similar place the conversation took place most of the time, but if I concentrate hard enough I can still pull it off.  It’s why I am glad I don’t live where I used to live or have to go to the church I used pastor.  Far too painful from the memory flood.  I have a hard enough time meeting people I used to know.  Yeah, that is enough of a trigger.  It’s why I really need a fresh start somewhere else still.

The cause of all this is of course wounds received at my own hand and the hand of others.  This time of year last year, I was forming a very tight relationship with someone.  My fault and hers that we ended up being closer than we should have been. I don’t really blame her or me anymore.  It happened, and assigning blame only really helps those who want to lie to themselves, so they can look themselves in the mirror. Or to look at me or the girl in the face again and still love us. Comforting lies don’t really help though. Just saying. We would all be better off facing the painful truth.

In one sense I look at my scars as the cause of this flickering emotion. Not so much the scars, as I wrote in my poem “The Scar”, but the seeping poison of a bleeding wound behind the scar – internal pain.  But I also know some of the deepest and still internally bleeding wounds were self-inflicted.  The ‘you’ in that poem has a lot of candidates, including myself.

I’m OK and I’m Broken at the same time. I wish there was some magical way to ‘get over it’ like people say at times.  But there isn’t.  I’m OK and I have to be OK with that.  I have to function despite the flicker lights and I do.  I have to for the sake of people I love and care for.  I have to love them when I don’t feel love and I have to love myself as well even when I don’t feel it.  I have to be OK, because sometimes its the best I have.

OK in The Grey,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Skald Tales and Poem – Poem – ‘The Scar’

Happy Saturn’s Day

“The Scar” by Edward W. Raby, Sr.  

“Time heals all wounds”

“Bullshit” I say

I have been down this road before

I have scars that still bleed inside

 

Internal bleeding of the soul

Seepage of pain within

Toxic soul-blood poisoning

Hidden behind my scars

 

The scar you left on me

Is like all the others

A covered scab

Hiding a slow bleeding wound

 

Another scar

Another badge of survival

The poison blood inside – fuel

The pain inside – motivation

Written by Edward W. Raby, Sr.  on March 15th, 2019.  Edited March 22, 2019

Author’s Commentary:

There are a lot of recent candidates for the ‘you’ in this poem.  Including the one who taught me how to appreciate and ‘enjoy’ writing poems.  In this case the quotes around ‘enjoy’ are probably stronger.  Normally a poem causes me to remember this person with a little twinge of joy and pain. This poem was one I needed to write but didn’t necessarily want to write. Mostly because it was like literally pushing on the scar in question this person had left on me, making it hurt just a little more than just a normal poem. She definitely fits the bill for ‘you’

That said, I think the ‘you’ could be several other candidates over the course of my life.  In any case the poem reflects my understanding that: 1) Scars are an illusion of healing. The wounds they hide never fully heal and often remain toxic and painful.  2) You just have to learn how to turn that toxic and hurtful nature of a wound received into fuel and motivation as you go forward. 3) Lovers and friends who betray or leave give us the most toxic and traumatic scars.  So underneath, no matter how much it looks outwardly you have moved on, they still remain a part of who you are. Even when you would wish it was not so.

Poetically, this was my first attempt in shortening my poetry.  Make the word choice more selective. Learning how to do this is a work in progress for me. As always constructive feedback on my poems is always appreciated.

Thanks for reading them,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Skald Tales and Poems – Poem – ‘The Storm’

Happy Saturn’s Day

Sorry, once again no Crossing Bifrost this week. I am still reading a lot on Norse Mythology right now and next week I will take on the goddess Frigg.  For this week, it is time I took two poems I have written this month and make them blogging canon. This one will drop now and the second one later this afternoon.

“The Storm” by Edward W. Raby, Sr.:

Wind, grey skies and pouring rain.

The Storm rages in my soul.

Fed by my inner pain.

Will I ever be whole?

 

Lightning flashes

Thunder rolls

I tighten my grip on the staff of my reality

Knowing only the treading of my feet

 

Boots grinding through grey mud

Soaked in sorrow, but my heart closed

Numb to the cold of The Grey

I struggle onward, not daring to feel

 

Lest my tears join the flood

And drown me in the rising tide.

I walk with the hope of seeing sunlight

I walk with the hope of feeling love

 

But right now, I feel nothing

So I will survive.

Soon, the wolf within will rise and howl

The ravens will caw again

 

For I know when the light breaks through.

Then I will howl, caw and laugh,

Once again I have endured The Storm

And I have become stronger

Written by Edward W, Raby, Sr. on March 9th and 10th, 2019. Edited on March 22, 2019

Author’s Commentary:

I guess this poem about depression; and how I take it on, is one of those that is very obvious.  The imagery in part is borrowed from this whole Grey Wayfarer concept.  I draw a lot of inspiration these days from the characters and stories of Norse Mythology. I like these gods – they have dirt under their fingernails and pain of soul.

People do not understand depression that well.  Mine is ‘mild’, if you can call depression mild.  It isn’t about happy or sad with me.  It is about emotional shutdown.  I go into cold-blooded bastard mode so I don’t have to feel sorrow or pain.  The sarcastic asshole is very much a part of both sides of my life, but in The Grey I don’t laugh at my own sarcasm like I do out of it. “No dark sarcasm in the classroom.” Yeah, it gets dark and there is no feeling to it. Outside the grey it more about being playfully affectionate with the people I care about.  Inside it, I am just being a dark fucker trying to survive.

The love-hate relationship with depression is something I tried to deal with the last stanza.  Like or not, when come out of it, I have some of the most creative and wonderful inspired moments.  I feel better, love better and think better in those moments. Some of my best writing has been at these times.

Thanks for reading,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!