Ministry

“Different Values” – The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and the Wayfarer – Part 15

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Tyr’s Day:

Yeah, I know.  It’s another week without “Of Wolves and Ravens”.  I need to get back to it for my own sake but right now the Grey is a ‘normal’ thing.  I knew July, in particular, would be difficult because of all that happened during this month last year and the reason is the memories are not necessarily bad ones.  It’s kind of like reading a story that has a lot of good things in it and happy times but you know a tragedy is going to hit at the end. Like following your favorite character in a story only to have them die suddenly.  It is that kind of emotion when you look at the story arc in retrospect.

The difference, of course, is the story is mine and I am the character so it is all too real and personal.

Another thing is I keep running into people from my past life as a pastor.  People I haven’t, in some cases, seen in over a year keep finding their way into my life. I play it cool but inside I would rather be far away. That journey is over and I want to leave the pain of it behind along with the people in the story as well.  They turned out to be characters that are not dynamic at all, just who reveal their true nature when someone doesn’t measure up to their expectations.

Of course, this leads to my real problem which is coming to terms in all aspects of my life with a different set of values I now possess.  What is important to me has changed and not in small ways but large ones. A loss of faith and a reevaluation of life will do that to you.  The questions that trouble my mind are ones that would make the writers of Babylon 5 proud: Who are you?  What do you want? Why are you here?

My oldest son recently observed I seem to be searching for something.  Something I haven’t found yet.  The young man has good insight.  I don’t call myself the Grey Wayfarer because it is just a fun persona. It is in many ways the philosophy of my life and one identity that seems to fit me with the expression as the motto of my life: “Not all who wander are lost”. It seems that my values involve a lot of searching and becoming something, but the one thing they do not involve is stagnancy or being unchanging.  For me change, and the chaos and joys that go with it, is becoming more of a desire than a fear.

The Grey is the thing that causes me to be stagnant at times, unchanging and that is the devil of it. The demon I understand.  It is why it is so important to force myself to change when I am depressed.  To keep doing something and keep walking through it is my therapy.

Perhaps that is why I write every single day.  Writing is a lot of things but I would never describe it as stagnant.  It is flowing and changing constantly. The creative process is like that. It is when I can’t write that I worry about me.

The point is also that the Nine Noble Virtues call one to improve and get better.  You can’t be a follower of the Nine without changing.  Every single one of them calls for change and so change is an essential part of my foundational philosophy.  The problem may be that some people in my life are too attached to where we are relationally, and to be in a relationship with me requires you to walk with me from time to time, and where I am is never the same.

I am sure there will be another The Grey and The Wayfarer post very soon.  Hopefully, it won’t fall on Tyr’s Day again.  But this week was some good insight into what makes me keep going because, as I will probably write next time, there are a lot of forces trying to compel me to quit and give up. The Grey is strong, but my desire for change is stronger so I keep walking and seeking what I am looking for.  I will know when I find it what it was.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Asatru and Hospitality” – Of Wolves and Ravens – Hospitality

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Hospitality is a virtue that is represented to Asatru as the glue that holds society and civilization together. The particular focus of Hospitality in the Norse context is one of being kind to strangers and travelers. If there is a virtue that relates personally to me as a wayfarer of life, it is this one. I have always appreciated the kindness people have shown me when I was far from home. Having a place where I knew I was safe while traveling is something that always warmed my heart.

It is this virtue of hospitality in the modern world that gets translated as being respectful to all human beings and giving people the things they need when they need them out of respect for their humanity. Need not want through here.  People can be treacherous and the virtue acknowledges that, and one part of this is once a person has acted treacherously toward you; you don’t have to lift a finger to help them again.

This is the ‘give and take’ of Hospitality.  It is not just enough to properly give it, but also to be thankful to receive it and not do it to take advantage of people.  What makes it work is the two-sided nature of Hospitality, both knowing how to properly give it and receive it.

Website: Ravenbok – The particular page is: The Values of Asatru

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Needs (Geri):

I think society needs this understanding of hospitality again  I need it.  I think it is more practical than the Christian notion of ‘give expect nothing in return’ that no one actually follows.  This is ‘give and receive graciously’ both ways, but always keep your eye on how people receive your hospitality and in what motivation that gives it to you.   This is not a license to manipulate or take advantage of people because at that point it ceases to be a virtue.

Wants (Freki):

We want hospitality to be present in our society as it is the one virtue that allows us to put aside our differences and work for the common good. That is all differences – political, religious and cultural.  Some things are bigger than the individual and only a team can take them on.

Reason (Huginn):

For myself as a person who has been on the receiving side of hospitality from time to time, I can see how broad you can make this.  It has the rational quality of being able to apply it to many different situations and in many different forms.  It is a good solid virtue that can be personalized to a great degree and that is a good quality to have as well.

Wisdom (Muninn):

Hospitality to be done properly requires the wisdom of experience and a good eye for judging the situation.  Laziness is not to be coddled only genuine need.  At the same time compassion needs to be exercised. It is wisdom that is the tool that is needed to know the difference.

Conclusion:

I personally only struggle with the concept of hospitality; in that, recent events of this last year have me with my own form of TNO (Trust No One) at a high level. I try to help when I can but I am always a suspicious fuck these days. The virtue right now at least forces me to try to consider it every time I read and meditate on it.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Basic Pagan Principles: Scope of Consciousness” – The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

 

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not given to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: “Fulga” – SKALD

Translation: https://lyricstranslate.com/en/fl%C3%BAga-fly.html

A fun little song here.

Meditation:

Image may contain: 1 person, text

Text:

Most pagan religions believe that consciousness extends far beyond the restraints of human form and physical existence. All life forms contain some level of consciousness, from the smallest insect to the giant redwood trees growing in the forest. Furthermore, consciousness does not end when we die, rather it survives death and exists simultaneously on multiple levels of reality.

Source: http://exotic-pets.yoexpert.com/exotic-pets-general/what-are-some-of-the-basic-principles-of-paganism-2192.html

Sermon:

Working the idea, pagans simply acknowledge there is something out there that is spiritual in nature beyond our normal five senses and reason to understand. That there is a part of existence that extends beyond biology and chemistry. That our own consciousness goes beyond our physical form.

Some pagans go to the point that saying every living thing has this as well.  Others go even further and extend the idea to everything that exists, that everything has a spiritual side to it and spiritual reality.

This part of pagan belief also extends to the idea of life after death.  There are so many different views here it is difficult to make any general statements and the author of our text wisely noted that pagans say we exist beyond death in a multitude of differnt levels.

I believe in science and reason.  There be no denying that science and reason are powerful tools in learning to live in this world effectively.  To learn how to achieve what we want and need very much requires reason and knowledge.  I, however, do not think that reason or science addresses all reality.   That there is something more to know is one of the tenents of science and perhaps we simply haven’t figured out how to measure the reality of consciousness.

The one thing for sure we can say is that science cannot explain a lot of things yet if they are honest and perhaps these things may be considered spiritual in the sense they remain mysteries. Once discovered the rational scientific people may discover that there is a spiritual side to man after all; they simply didn’t have a way to observe or measure it.

The reason I remain a pagan in this regard is that I hold open to the possibility of a spiritual reality that cannot be understood by normal means.  There is something more to love than biology. Something more to attraction than physics. Something more to the beauty that the eye of the beholder. I still think that without this idea of a spiritual reality, you have a very dead meaning to a life where life’s only purpose is life itself.  So I wander as a seeker looking for it.

Parting Thought:

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Learn to be wise and you will always be free.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“April-June 2019 Assessment (Part Two) ” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

As I continue to look at the progress of my goals and bucket list items, I am reminded that the whole point of doing this is I am building a new life for myself. All of this is about walking the path known as my life and making it new. It is why this quote from Socrates resonates with me so much.  I wonder to myself a lot if fighting the past is worth it and I say ‘no it isn’t’. So my focus in having goals and a bucket list is more about the new and building the new.  Central to that is the Nine Noble Virtues if Asatru and in the case of my new career and life involving the business of life – Self-Reliance, Industriousness, and Hospitality take center stage.

At this point I can celebrate a goal achieved already this year but also a struggle rears its ugly head. Mostly, now that I have determined that goals need to have a year time limit I breathe a little easier but that is no cause to not try to do them sooner if possible. Let the evaluation continue.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by the end of June 2019 or before.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

I am getting to the point of frustration with my job search in Michigan.  I think it is because opportunities are not what I am looking for in my home state.  I keep turning down job offers and opportunities from a friend who lives in Texas and I wonder why I keep doing so.  If it is a new life I am looking for I can’t think of any better way to do it than move 1000 miles away and start over. If I don’t find something by the end of June this goal will have to be reevaluated and I might have to have a long discussion with my family about how they feel about my wife and me living farther away.

Put a time limit on owning my business or company out 10 years.  Maximum limit but it needed to be done so I can look at this more objectively.  Deadline no matter how far out tend to make me work toward something more effectively.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

Goal achieved here and so I am ready to look for what is next.  I know I will probably further my education at some point again but I am thinking a new job for a year might be good right now to catch my breath and get a sense of a new normal before I begin pursuing another degree.

Writing comes up again, I am going to put a three-year time limit on the novel.  But from a routine standpoint, I think treating writing like a ‘job’ is a better call with it part of the daily routine in some way.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader of a support group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I may change this goal a little next week.  I am not sure if I want to lead or be a part of one or if it necessarily needs to be an official support group. What I think would be more beneficial and an opportunity to be hospitable is simply to join something that gives me a chance to be a part of something that is fun and promotes human relationships in some way. Could be a lot of things here, but recognize my need to be a part of a group that gives me a social life. Me being INFJ taken into account, I know this is true.

My own home.  It is a good thought and one I want to see happen within five years. I have lost a lot being in the ministry for twenty years and not owning a house is one of those things that is a consequence of that life.  New life says I want to own my home and secondly have it paid off by the time life makes me retire.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

My attempt in life and business is to treat people as best as possible.  To achieve relationships privately and in business relationships that are mutually beneficial and lead to prosperity.  Justice is about being as equitable as possible.  I still think that my goals and bucket list items reflect that.

Daily Routine:

  1. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  3. Reading – half-hour. Priority order: work, school, pleasure
  4. Study / Homework / Research: half hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, other actions, etc.
  6. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  7. Weekly Routine Items
  8. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

This list will get longer and my weekly list shorter.  But I am also going to do something that distinguishes work days from a day off work. More on this in a couple days as this affects the Weekly Routine the most.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Basic Pagan Principles – Freedom of Choosing Deity” – The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not given to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: “Krigsgaldr” – Heilung

Good beat to this one. It’s actually in English so enjoy it.

Meditation:

Image may contain: one or more people, text and outdoor

This idea extends very much to a man’s religion and spirituality.

Text:

In all pagan religions, it is up to the individual to determine what Deity means to them, who or what Deity is right for them and how they ultimately develop their relationship with their chosen Deity. Pagans have many different ideas about what encompasses Deity and how their Deity is represented. It is up to the individual, through study of their religion, meditation and in some cases prayer, to determine what image of Deity is right for them.

Source: http://exotic-pets.yoexpert.com/exotic-pets-general/what-are-some-of-the-basic-principles-of-paganism-2192.html

Sermon:

I am very much interested in Norse Mythology. I love the stories of the gods and goddesses of that pantheon because they resonate with my northern soul and are very cool to put it simply.  The question comes: do I actually believe that the gods and goddesses of Norse Mythology – do they actually exist?  I would say a rational ‘no’ but at the same time, the pagan idea is that we all conceive of the divine in our own way and it is very possible that divine powers like the Norse pantheon exist.

In reality, we all do this to the divine, the pagans are simply honest about it. I spent 40 years as Christian and half that time as a pastor and I can tell you each individual Christian conceives of the god of the Bible in a very unique way.  What happens is each Christian resonates with a different part scripture, usually with a single author or book/passage in particular, more than others and they conceive of their version of the Christian god that way. If you talk to 100 Christians about a certain aspect of the biblical god, you will get 100 distinct answers.

Pagans just honestly say this is normal and that what is really happening with all of us.  They take the honest step and say each person’s view of the divine reality is going to be unique and that is what should be. Let each individual decided for themselves what the divine is like and how to relate to it. Talk about a spirituality form that doesn’t have the religious aspect of control to it.  The ultimate freedom is here where you get to decide what the divine might be like and how to both approach them and worship them if at all.

I don’t think it takes too long for people to see how I do this. I resonate with Odin a lot.  The pilgrim side of Odin in particular.  The wanderer looking for truth and knowledge where ever he can find them for me is a powerful and truthful image that relates to me very well. I don’t pray to him because it is my concept and I recognize that.  Could I go to a pagan blot and offer up a cup in his name? Yeah, sure. But it would be about community and reaffirming my commitment to the ideals I hold dear for my life.

Odin’s myth is the creator of mankind, so I can look at him as a diest would look at the divine.  Thankful for being created, but pretty sure he has more important things to look after than my petty stuff. I need to take care of that shit myself.  Going back to the Responsibility of Action as one of the other principles. Yes, I do conceive of deity in my own way, but as a pagan, I simply can also accept that others do the same and that is OK as well.  We all seek for the divine, if they exist, in our own way and it is not wrong just the reality of what we do as human beings.

If there is any lesson to be learned here is that we should all just relax when people have a different concept of the divine reality.  We shouldn’t force ours on them or accept it when they force theirs on us. We are all just pilgrims looking for the divine in our lives. We shape the understandings we have of that ourselves and that is alright by me as a pagan.

Parting Thought:

Image may contain: 1 person, beard and text

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“The Business of Marriage” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

This post will is being written the last moments of my wife and I’s little anniversary excursion. I am up in the early am again as always and she is sleeping nearby.  This post will, however, drop on Wooden’s Day.  I will be back to work, my wife too.  We will be back to the business of our lives and the business of marriage will resume.

I know some people don’t like that idea of ‘the business of marriage’.  Romanticism has done that to us. Truth is in the past people had a far better understanding of ‘business’ as being the relationships people have.  Sometimes business involves money, but it always involves a human relationship.  Marriage is at its core a business relationship.  I mean I can get friendship and sex without marriage.  I can even have kids without it.  What marriage brings to the table is a certain understanding of responsibility toward each other.  I am not going to debate the thought of if this is how it should be, but society and the people involved in marriage are in business together as far as a relationship and that is supposed to be about gaining mutual gain and happiness.

Socially it has all the trappings of a business relationship 1) A contract, 2) expectations and 3) a cost. I am not sure I like these thoughts either which is why I have said that anything should happen to my wife (no I don’t want that to happen but I am a realist about these things), my next intimate relationship with a woman may not involve any of what mainstream society thinks.  Just read what any libertarian writes about marriage licenses and government involvement in marriage and you will get what I think about them.

The thing is with my wife and me the business of marriage has never been our problem.  It is the balance of love of the other person and the love of ourselves that is the most difficult about this, but more on that in a couple days.  For now, I want to simply point to the fact that my wife and I have a business arrangement and the license, rings, and vows don’t stop you from breaking it. Something we have both learned through painful experience.  No, you have to commit to walking in the virtues of business to make this work.  You have to commit to the ideals of self-reliance, industriousness, and hospitality.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by the end of June 2019 or before.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company.

Part of self-reliance is having someone you can trust to work with you to achieve independence. It is easy to work for your own independence but when you start that bridge to working for the independence of your family, that first person that should be your partner in that is your spouse or it better be. My wife and I have always been good partners in this regard because we share a pretty common thread of not wanting to be dependent on others for support.  Neither of us likes to spend money unless we have to and that helps but it is also sometimes a drag.  There is a reason why independence needs to be celebrated and that is what this last anniversary trip was about.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published.

A long term relationship is work.  There are often no shortcuts to it either.  You also don’t want to be just working at it to work at it. Doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result is insanity after all.  Relationships need some level of efficient working at communication and actions.  This one is a struggle for me in the communication part as I have this issue of verbal communication of feelings.  It is real work for me to express them with my mouth.  Easier with my fingers on a keyboard. So it is work to talk.  It also is a recognized vulnerability for me when I can open up verbally about anything I want to talk about.  I didn’t realize this until very recently.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader of a support group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

The essence of hospitality is compassion.  For my wife and me, as a pastor and wife in the past, this was a central tenet of our ministry – compassion to people.  Hospitality was something we wanted people to feel.  Now, I am not sure how we are going to express that together with me leaving the faith and the ministry. It is something we will in the future have to figure out.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

At some point last year, my marriage became worth fighting for and it still is.  Part of this is the concept of treating my wife as fairly as possible. Part of it is also that I am being treated fairly by her and making sure that she and I are living up to our end of what we agreed to  All this and at the same time making sure we each are not losing what we want for ourselves.  Justice is the main goal of the business virtues.

Daily Routine:

  1. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  3. Reading – half-hour. Priority order: work, school, pleasure
  4. Study / Homework / Research: half hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, other actions, etc.
  6. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  7. Weekly Routine Items
  8. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

I will be working on moving things from my weekly routine to this one as much as possible next week. Trying something new to get better results.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Basic Pagan Principles – Everything is Sacred” – The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not given to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: “Rune” – SKALD (lyric video)

English Translation: https://lyricstranslate.com/en/r%C3%BAn-rune.html

A little long about the Runes.

Meditation:

Image may contain: text, outdoor and nature

Just a little reminder of last weeks lesson before we hit this one.

Text:

Most pagan religions believe that everything in the universe is sacred, but the definition and level of sacredness applied to an object will generally vary from one pagan to another. For some pagans, all parts of our universe are considered divine and as such, sacred and worthy of our deepest respect.

Source: http://exotic-pets.yoexpert.com/exotic-pets-general/what-are-some-of-the-basic-principles-of-paganism-2192.html

Sermon:

Everything is sacred in paganism.  This means there is no distinction of things as evil or good which is the first significant implication of this principle.  No object or thing is better than another.  Objects and places are all sacred. So they cannot be evil or good. Moral ‘evil’ or ‘good’ is found in our actions, results, and intents, not things. Yet all things have a spiritual quality to them.  This is mostly to remind us that we are connected in some way to everyone and everything around us.

Like all things pagan, this principle is individually applied and its application is as individual as the pagans themselves. We each see some things as more sacred than others. That’s why in some forms of paganism there are still religious aspects with sacred places, practices, and rituals.  Some consider the universe itself as divine while others see it more as spiritual but not necessarily divine.  Like I said at this point there is a lot of variances but in the end, there is nothing wrong with any of these views. Paganism is very genuinely tolerant, so to each their own.

For me, the religious aspects of paganism are not my thing. I live with a more deistic mindset on those things, although I understand the benefits of community and honoring things that are virtuous and respecting the past, present, and future actions of my fellow human beings.  I suppose I consider human beings and their liberty as the most sacred thing as a humanist, so it is reflected in my paganism. For me, my paganism is ultimately found in Asatru and following the Nine Noble Virtues.

As far as the rest of creation as being sacred that includes the things that man creates. not just the natural world.  Human beings and what they do are also natural and I feel the whole natural/ artificial thing is a bunch of noise.  Where did the so-called ‘artificial’ come from if not nature?  A computer is just as sacred to me as a tree.  Beavers create dams, bees make hives, humans create computers.  The difference is only in the mind of people who want to use this distinction to control others. I am far more a conservationist than an environmentalist.

The beauty here though is once again freedom of choice about it.  It is simply a principle that flows out of the previous principles that your beliefs are your own and you alone are responsible for them.  This includes how you look at the world around you.

Parting Thought:

 

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Tolerance (the real stuff), admiration, compassion, kindness – these are real love and they don’t involve – obedience, conformity, fear or submission.  Those are not aspects of love – rather they are aspects of slavery.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“The Last Sermon” – The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and the Wayfarer – Part 11

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day

One year ago today (May 27th, 2018), I preached my last sermon as a Christian pastor. When people ask me how I am doing, I am doing as well as can be expected, given the time of year and the memories involved with it. Part of that is leaving the identity behind of ‘pastor’.  This week is dotted with a lot of emotions, but leaving the ministry behind for good was bittersweet and it speaks to me of waste.  The thought that I have wasted 20 years of my life crosses my mind a lot.

My last sermon couldn’t have been more ironic. I was in an affair preaching on adultery from the ten commandments. My basic message was that if Jesus’ words on adultery were the facts, then we have all failed and we just need to cling to grace because that is all we got. No one is going to make it if the standard is not lusting.  No one could meet that standard.

Emotionally this was my most difficult sermon ever. I just wanted the service to end and go home. Neither my flame at the time or my wife was there and I felt alone and just sick of being a pastor and all of it. I went home, the woman I was having an affair with told her aunt about it.  I told my wife and the rest is a painful history.

I wouldn’t have minded so much but when it came to my last church, the message of grace seemed completely lost, even though I had been preaching it for nine and a half years to them. Lots of wasted words from my point of view. The man I entrusted my resignation to engaged in a plan to basically make things to be much worse than they really were.

For the record once again, I have never actually had sex with the woman I had an affair with, in fact ever.  At the time of my resignation, it had barely graduated beyond “I love you” and holding hands at a prayer meeting that looked normal to everyone else.  People made this to be much more than it was and that hurt too.  Because the man in charge let it happen on purpose. He told me he didn’t want gossip to spread through the church which is very sensible. He also told me he didn’t want to drag the woman into it either to protect her, something that was my concern as well. But once he had my resignation I had revised removing that confession line at his request, he called the woman up within probably minutes of me giving it to him and asked her permission to tell the story.

In the week’s that followed he did everything possible to make sure that gossip and rumor were exactly what happened. He deliberately dragged the woman into it (made possible by the fact we had broken up at the time and we were not talking to each other)  to do this and used her to get to me. I looked like I was hiding something, which I wasn’t. He looked like the hero so he could feed that ego and hero complex of his. He used it in the following weeks to paint a picture of me as a monster, the woman as a victim and him as the white knight that was here to bring the monster down. What a load of bullshit he piled up. All of it. 

In the end, he used the emotional hurt and anger of the congregation to get me fired and no severance given. I was never informed of anything that was going on officially until it was all over. The whole process was done without me being asked to speak on my own behalf one time.  ‘Grace’ and ‘Mercy’ at their finest.  That’s sarcasm if you can’t tell.  Bitter Sarcasm.   

I have forgiven the congregation for this.  They were misinformed and misled by a man who has to be in control of everything because he is personally insecure. People like him are in every church and the real cause of problems and why churches don’t succeed and have the reputations they have.  I have even forgiven the woman’s busybody aunt who did the most to engage in gossip. She was just acting in anger and hurt and I very much understand it.  She actually had good reasons to act the way she did, even if her actions were not very Christian.  Whatever that means. 

But the man himself – if there is any force of justice in the world I hope he has to experience the betrayal, manipulation, lies, theft of honor, and all the rest of it that he visited on me himself.  That karma visits on him the exact same thing he did to me. If nothing else I hope he lives a long and miserable life surrounded by no one at the end of it. That would be an end which he deserves because of his very utilitarian view of friendship. His friends no longer seeing him as useful so they simply don’t show up to help or comfort him. That would be truly fitting. 

As far as me and The Grey, this ‘one year ago thing’ is bothering me but I am moving through it. I refuse to go down to this storm.  I want to walk through it laughing at it. Mostly though, I just want a new sense of identity beyond the pastoral ministry thing.  It’s garbage to me now. An old cloak I have discarded. The white hat, the cross, and white cloak no longer suit me.  I prefer grey vestments and vulknut medallion now.

Mostly, my wife and I are trying to build some new memories. I worry about her as she has to get used to a man who is in many ways, not the same as he was. A man who is damaged in some ways, trying to heal as well.  Who will never completely heal and will no longer be what he was.  I want her to be happy because my own happiness depends on it.  I just don’t know about my side of it a lot.

The last sermon I preached in the church was ironic but also fitting.  The whole thing of pastoral ministry is adultery in my opinion now.  A pastor’s church is a mistress.  One that takes a lot and gives back very little and much like a real mistress drives a wedge between you and those you love as a pastor. A smart man gets out a lot sooner than I did.

I walk The Grey right now.  It is this time of year last year where every day has some significant event and memory that makes it difficult.  It probably won’t stop until the summer is over. I am just trying to live my life and living it in joy as much as possible.  If it wasn’t for the guilt and pain I have associated with these memories of last year, it would be easier.  The thing is I have come to accept that this walk is my path, but I can’t control the weather. I wish I could.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

“Basic Pagan Principles – Responsibility of Belief” – The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: ‘Úlfhéðnar’ – Norse Viking Music

If you want to get the most out of the Pagan Pulpit.  Put the theme song on a loop and then read the rest of it. The Ulfhedmar were the wolf warriors of Odin.

Meditation:

Image may contain: 1 person, text

It is important to know the difference.  One requires sleep and the other requires action.

Text:

The most basic tenant of paganism is that it is your own responsibility, not the responsibility of any government, institution, church or other people, to choose what you believe in regards to spirituality, values, ethics, the nature of Divinity, etc.

Source: http://exotic-pets.yoexpert.com/exotic-pets-general/what-are-some-of-the-basic-principles-of-paganism-2192.html

Sermon:

In Paganism there is no appeal to authority to justify your actions. This would violate the first of the basic tenets which is that each person is responsible for their own beliefs. This is called the Responsibility of Belief.

The first point of this is to accept your responsibility for what you believe. It is yours and no one else to decide what you believe and how you practice your spirituality.  It is yours alone and there is no one to blame or praise for where your spirituality is or your conduct regarding it. No blaming God.  No “God told me to do this.”  You act on your spirituality and take full responsibility for the results – good or bad.

The second point is to emphasize what cannot be used as a scapegoat.  The government is not responsible for your spiritual state, nor a religion, institution or community of people. None of these things can be responsible for where you are in regards to the spiritual part of your life.  Just you and only you.  Your spirituality is the product of your own choices and journey.  They should not be dictated to by anything else nor should you blame anything else for them.

The third point is the scope of what we mean when we say ‘spirituality’.  It involves all things that touch spiritual life, ethics, morals, values, the nature of Divinity, etc. These are all yours and no one else to take responsibility for.  If it can be considered spiritual in some way, then you are responsible for it. This is why I find most things have a spiritual side to them because they involve ethics, morals and simply a spiritual sense to them. There is more to this than pagan rituals and feelings.

There is no “Be patient, God isn’t finished with me yet” in paganism. No “I am waiting on God to make me more patient, loving, etc.”  If you feel you lack spirituality, a moral compass or ethical understanding; it is on you and you alone to fix that. That is the essence of Responsibility of Belief.

Parting Thought:

Image may contain: 1 person, text that says '"Now, every time I witness a strong person, I want to know: What darkness did you conquer in your story? Mountains do not rise without earthquakes" -Katherine MacKenett ITheMindsJournal THE HEMINDSJOURNAL'

The great face down the struggles of life and use them to become stronger.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Still Four Objections with No Answers” – Odin’s Eye – My Four Theological Objections to Christianity Revisited

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

I am approaching the date now where I will have been out of the ministry and away from Christianity for a whole year.  I have literally not darkened the door of a church in that entire time. I can’t say I miss it. Mostly, it is the simple fact that it no longer makes any sense to me. It is my four objections that I formed that stand stronger than my faith ever was.  No one has come forward and no one has offered answers. To review my objections with links provided:

Odin’s Eye -Objections to Christianity – Part 1 – The Bible’s Inspiration by God

Odin’s Eye – Objections to Christianity – Part 2 – Sin: An Imaginary Man-Made Problem

Odin’s Eye – Objections to Christianity – Part 3 – The Cross and Empty Tomb – An Imaginary Solution to an Imaginary Problem.

Odin’s Eye – Objections to Christianity – Part 4 – The Justice of the Biblical God – An Unbalanced Scale

I still stand by them.  For the Eye today I am more looking at my feelings about my former faith than anything else.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

The most nonsensical statement in Scripture is Hebrews 11:1 –  “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.”  Most Christians think this is deep and profound but what it really is saying is that the only evidence and proof of the things we ask you to believe in is your own choice to believe them.  There is no evidence to prove any of our assertions, so the Writer of Hebrews simply asks them to take their own choice to have faith as the substance and evidence that proves it.  How would this be any different than simply asking people to believe in Thor or Apollo in the same way?  Nothing really. Christian faith certainly isn’t special in that regard.

Religion:

I now look at Christianity even more skeptically than before as a religion.  I see how religion can be used to control people and Christianity is a great perpetrator of that.  Before as a Christian, I was like George Washington in that I may have been devout but I was skeptical of a lot of things.  Now I am just skeptical.  I am working on my first non-fiction book that might be considered anti-Christianity, but trust me I have a list I considered on various topics and it is quite possible that this could be a deep well of ideas that could lead to a writing career doing nothing more but being a skeptic. Christianity has a lot of problems particularly in the USA and it could be a gold mine for a writer with my knowledge of it and my current mindset about it.

Theology:

My four objections are theological and they are also hard to break.  I know I have tried to break them myself for years.  This transition from being a theologian who is an apologist for Christianity to one that is a skeptic of Christianity was personally very difficult. But I refuse to waste my time being an apologist for something I now consider to be as made up as other religions. Christianity is sophisticated makebelieve, but makebelieve nonetheless. It’s my knowledge of theology that tells me that.

Spirituality:

I love it when I tell people I am no longer religious but spiritual.  I think they think I am some warlock chanting some magical shit, but nothing could be further from the truth. Mostly I draw my spirituality from experiencing life and all that there is to it. I find myself listening in meditation now almost exclusively, I don’t pray at all. I think not whining to the universe or the Divine and taking personal responsibility for yourself is a good first step in being a mature spiritual adult.

Conclusion:

I think to myself sometimes about the things I have lost by leaving Christianity.  Friends, colleagues and a sense of community that were all left behind. However, I have gained an honesty that I find much more satisfying and more appealing to my actual self than ever. I still remain open to someone trying to give me some answers, but so far nothing.  In the meantime, I walk the road of life. My eye wide open.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!