Goals

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – The Last Battle?

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin) Day

Journal Entry:

This is just something running around in my head of late but there is always this notion that our lives lead up to some sort of climax, some sort of last battle.  Some defining moment that identifies us for who we are forever.  We romanticize this notion and most of our stories and book of fiction are all about this idea of climax.  I am not sure too many people actually get to experience this idea in reality.

For me, it could be said that I have had several of these final battles. It’s what causes me to think that life is more of a series of peace and war. Perhaps each battle gets mere difficult, perhaps not. The issue is that in times of peace one must prepare one’s heart for war.  Not because it is more beneficial than peace, but because war is inevitable wither with the world, with people or with self.

If I do have a final battle, it will simply be final because it is the last one I fought and it will either be that which kills me, or it will be the thing that leads to me final time of peace before I die.  It may not be my biggest battle, I probably will actually tell stories about that over a pint of mead.  No, the last battle will not be my toughest, just my last one.

I say this because the toughest battles are usually the first ones where you are learning to fight whatever enemy it is.  You survive, so the next time the next battle is easier.  My last battle should be the easiest one way or the other. Some where though there will be a great battle that was the turning point ans I do think that is coming up very soon.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

Finishing my education and finding a new and better job is the first step in becomes more self-reliant.  Right now I am focused on finishing my last classes and getting things done one at a time and trying to stay focused on finishing everything possible.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

I do enjoy study and homework when I feel the learning taking place in my head.  When it seems to be just busy work it can be more difficult.  What I am learning again, is this feeling of learning is very much up to me.  It is my feeling to generate as I start. This is something I need to remember long after I finish school.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

Hospitality is minimal right now.  Not only is our prosperity limited but also time. Once school is done and things are a little more stable, I really hope to change this.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading – 1 hour per day.
  4. Study / Homework – 1 hour per day or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Empty In Box
  6. Financial Transaction Input

Next time I will be addressing nutritional questions and one of the things that might appear here is a check area for number of carb sources a day.   That is I might have five check boxes for the five foods with carbs in them I can eat that day.  AS I draw nearer to my birthday that number would actually get less and less until the last couple weeks it would be zero.

Goals: 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Graduate with Political Science Degree in December 2018.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of January 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

#2 is less than three weeks away and there is a lot to do before then but the goal is in sight. Just for the record, my blogging streak will be at 59 days today when this post drops. What I need to do once school is finished is do an assessment before the beginning of 2019 to set some sort of action plan in place for these things.

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

This month brought in extra money because of how my pay periods lined up, holiday pay and bonuses.  The problem was our cars ate most of it. We would have been very close to having #1 done otherwise.  Still fighting.  Hopefully a better paying job will help.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – My Comeback

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day

Journal Entry:

This week and next are going to be hell.  I have school to finish and there is a lot of work to do.  I also have to work a job and a marriage to maintain.  I also have to get enough sleep to function, so this means Discipline, Industriousness and Courage all in play.  Here we go.

I want to take time out to take a breath as I dive in headfirst and look to the future.  You have to see the finish line and the purpose of why you are doing what you are doing.  That provides motivation and I need motivation.

The above meme really does encapsulate my life so far.  These last few years have been rough ones and I really need to make 2019 my comeback year.

2016 – It did change me.  I learned who was really in charge of my church and no one was going to do anything to help me change it.  My crisis of faith started,  I took a sabbatical that year to think things over.  My course changed then.

2017 – Yeah, it did break me.  I began to think of my marriage and ministry as a sham.  A good friend died that summer and several things changed.  I became painfully aware of a deep loneliness and depression.  This was my state at the end of the year when a woman started to enter my life, but I really didn’t have feelings that were inappropriate for her until the next year.  I was just thankful at that time for a new and growing friendship.

2018 – This has been a year of opening my eyes.  I discovered how false many of the friends, particularly in church, I had were.  In February, my organist died and this affected me deeply because at that point all the old I had started with was gone.  The real problem was only one person was really listening to me and helping me through it. This lead to an emotional affair, my trying to resign over it but being fired instead, a near divorce, the loss of a close ‘friend’ who turned out to not be a friend.  An emotionally up and down summer with a breakup, a marriage reconciliation, moving and a new job all while continuing school.  The scales have definitely fallen off my eyes and like the Phoenix, I am rising from the ashes of 2018 as an awake and very different person. I feel true to myself at last and, as I wrote yesterday, ‘The Fire of Fury’ burns in my bones and I am ready for what is next.

2019? – I need this to be a comeback year, a new career direction, a stronger marriage and renewed prosperity. I am determined to make it happen.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – Be positive about my future

I am suspecting that after these next three weeks are over and things are at last done for the majority of my school work. I will feel like more honor is restored at that point.  I will feel that things will be better at least from a self-worth standpoint. I will have achieved something I set out to accomplish. Then it will be a simple matter of finding a way to use the education to better myself further.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

There is a lot to act on and I cannot hesitate at this point.  I have a lot to do and nothing can distract me either so I need to stay focused and go forward.  The fear to overcome is that I won’t finish everything.  I need to bury that and just start eating the last elephant, one bite at a time.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times.

The truth is that I need to continue to be truthful with myself. It is what has kept me making good decisions for a bit now.  This truth thing leads to a lot better path, but one that is often more difficult.  It is however the difficulty of the truth that makes us struggle more and thus get stronger.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) and Principles
  2. Review Goals
  3. Review Bucket List
  4. Full Body Stretch
  5. Meditate on One of the Virtues
  6. Breakfast
  7. Supplements and Medicines
  8. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  9. Get Dressed for the Day

I have to say this morning routine is the most successful one I have ever done. I actually look forward to it every morning.

Bucket List:

  1. Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.
  2. Get My Tattoos.
  3. Actually Get Drunk.
  4. Smoke a Joint.
  5. Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
  6. Write My Novel.
  7. Learn Latin.
  8. Learn Hungarian.
  9. Weightlifting – Bench 225 lbs, Squat 315 lbs, and Deadlift 405 lbs.
  10. Start my own business

So by July 1st, 2019 I need to cross one of these off.  We will see if its learning one of the languages, the novel or getting a tattoo or two. Those are my best bets at this point.

Weightlifting:

I am going to visit all the gyms in the town where I work very soon.  My membership at my current gym expires in a few weeks.  It also looks like it will be shutting down for good anyway.  There are three options based on a preliminary look, so I will be looking at all of them probably during exam week as I won’t have an incredible amount to do.  By the time exams are over, I will have to make this decision.  I really hate to leave my current gym.  It was a love at first sight thing and I will miss it.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – Three Week Timer Set

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sun’s Day

Three weeks.  It’s all I have left of school and my degree pursuit.  Because of the need at this point to keep on track I am probably going to do a The Rabyd Skald Post to start each week to get a sense of my bearings as far as where I am and how much time I have left.

This is a good week with a lot of potential to get a lot of things done.  I only have twenty hours of work this week so there is extra time for homework and I am going to need it.  There is work to complete that I can get done in time I just have to stay focused for the two weeks left of class and the last week of exams.  I also have some practical shit to do as far as getting ready for graduation.  What’s left:

Cross Cultural Communication – This class had a group project that is already completed.  I just need to evaluate my peers and their performance.  Do the final chapters of reading and the final discussion online.  One last test which is the last day of class not on exam week because it is an online class.  I figure this class will take a day plus the discussion over three days to finish. It’s my last International Business class and finishes off that minor.

GIS – I have to confess I am behind here and the first priority will be to catch up.  I have maps to do and one lab.  None of this takes more than an hour to an hour and a half to do.  It’s just a matter of sitting down and doing them and keeping up when they are assigned. I have to confess my real problem with this class is it is something I probably might have to understand how it works but I will never do this stuff as a career.  I am just not into geography or computer programs that deal with it. It is however required for my Political Science Degree.  It’s Online so the work will also be done the last day of class.

Inferential Statistics – My problem with this class is I find math too easy mostly.  I have aced every raw math class in college so far.  I have a tendency to overlook this class at times. There is also the problem that I can’t really work ahead in this class as the professor assigns stuff to do for the next class and that’s pretty much how it rolls.  I have found the theory part of this class very interesting and relative to my Economics work.  That’s probably why its one of two classes that finishes off my Economics Minor. I just need to do every assignments and keep up with it as they happen.  I am sure there will be a final during finals weeks as it is one of two on campus classes I have.

Health Economics – I really only have one major thing left for this and that is the academic paper.  Thankfully, I am can double dip on this one and my Capstone (More on this later).  It is basically going to be a 15 page paper that is journal publishable.  That means probably 20 to 30 sources and a little bit of writing to do. This is one of my on campus classes so it has an exam time during exam week.  I will have time to study for that, so no worries until then.

Political Science Capstone: Also a scholarly journal publishable paper. I decided early on that this would be in Health Economics Policy so I could double dip and this idea was accepted by both professors.  I have to give a defense like a thesis on this one too so there is that as well.  I almost wish I had done this with my internship next semester but I figured let’s get everything done so I can start the job search sooner.  Luckily I am basically writing one fifteen page paper and counting it for two things.

This week is one where I need to make sure my three classes (Cross Cultural Communication, GIS and Inferential Statistics) are caught up and stay caught up to the end.  I also need to do a lot of research for this one paper and it has to be scholarly research on Google scholar or the campus library.  I need to have an outline, literature review and thesis fairly soon. Like by Wednesday so I am not planning on getting much sleep or much relax time in.  Tuesday my wife and I have counseling and I am going to have to consider that my break from all this at least this week.

I am initiating a hiatus on all entertainment forms except blogging each day.  I can only engage my routines, my homework and studying for the next two weeks for sure. The reason I can take this is frankly I can see it is coming to an end and by December 16th, I will be effectively finished with everything.  This week is getting the grunt work done, getting things up to date and keeping it there. I suspect a lot of caffeine consumption.

I have to pick up my cap and gown and order tickets for graduation. December 15th is the day but I really only have two weeks for most of this. I also have to finalize my internship for spring term but that should be simply filling out the forms. Time to make it happen.

To battle,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – Burning the Candle at Both Ends

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin) Day

Journal Entry:

I was told a couple of days ago at work that I looked like I was tired all the time.  That same coworker who knows I work, go to school and am working on my marriage (my life trifecta) said she was worried because she thought I was burning the candle at both ends.  Like Hitchens I have found in such times, life gives off such a wonderful glow.  It’s too bad that what is burning is your soul.

I have to admit I am probably more tired than usual and my sleep schedule is light most of the time.  I mean 5-6 hours at night with an hour nap thrown in somewhere, maybe if I have time, is not exactly a great amount of sleep but I can pull it off fairly regularly.  That said a day off and I am probably not setting the alarm.

I find this feeling on the one hand just numbing but on the other hand I like pressure as it brings out the best work in me.  I have experienced this many times and know it is both true and creates some of my best creative work.  That’s burning the candle at both ends, and it does lead to more light and heat. I hope I survive it. 🙂

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

If there is any challenge to self-reliance it is that in order to live in modern western society you ‘need’ to have vehicles and insurance.  These things often mean you actually sacrifice on your actual needs.  The nice thing is that school is coming to an end, I am dusting off my resume and will probably start the job hunt beginning of December.  If I can make more money and gain some benefits that will go a long way to following the path to self-reliance.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

I like the people  I work with.  I like my team leader.  It is more a matter of the fact that despite I am strong and in good shape that physical labor is still putting on mileage I would rather not feel.  I enjoy working.  What I want to find is work that I enjoy.  Work that doesn’t beat me down physically as much.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

Prosperity still needed for more hospitality.  But we do have room for one more mouth at most meals.  I think one day that will be put into actual practice.  The goal is still to achieve prosperity that leads to hospitality.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading – 1 hour per day.
  4. Study / Homework – 1 hour per day or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Empty In Box
  6. Financial Transaction Input

Been tough this week with The Grey being a little stronger, but following the routine every day keeps things moving forward. I am enjoying the routine at times as it keeps my information of where I am very current so I am being very informed in the everyday decisions.  I am not running blind and in part that is due to the routine.

Goals: 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Graduate with Political Science Degree in December 2018.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of January 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

#2 and #3 are very much in sight and I am thinking that is a very good thing.  Both are the culmination of a dream that started about five years ago of a second and different career.  My old career didn’t end like I expected, but I am now very much in position to start a new one.

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

Had a lot of knocks to the budget and the plan this week. Mostly in the form of vehicle repairs.  That said we are still floating.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – Stan Lee – Being a Writer

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sun’s Day:

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

See the source image

Seems like every time I turn around here some great icon I love has died and this week its a man who probably inspired my imagination more than any other during his life. Mostly because he has been around from the beginning.  Spider-Man was to be my favorite comic character for his human struggles, snappy sarcastic wit and he was just plain cool.  But I also found myself reading Stan’s editorial comments in his comic books and discovered a man who was inspiring in his imagination and advice to writers and aspiring comic book artists.  This session of the Pagan Pulpit salutes Marvel Comics’ heart and soul – Stan Lee (1922-2018) – RIP.

Opening Song: Spider Man Theme Song 1960s

A song from my childhood and one that celebrates probably the best comic character of all time. It may be a cheesy song from the 1960s but that was normal back then.  In any case, my Saturday morning cartoons were dotted with comic book super heroes and Spidey was one of them.  Stan’s ultimate genius was a character that was real as a person but super as a hero.

Poem:

Image may contain: 1 person, sunglasses and text

This poem went viral when Stan wrote it. He released it about two years ago.  It speaks for itself.  Stan was a pretty standard poet.  His words however were anything but normal or standard.

Meditation:

See the source image

Song of Preparation: X-Men Opening Theme

More cartoon stuff but from my teen age to early twenties (yes, I read comics and watched super hero cartoons well into adulthood).  The X-Men were favorites of mine with the underlying tone of them being a call against racism. Stan Lee had a way of letting his characters not only be real, but also they addressed tough issues and the X-Men and its mutants were one of those groups that addressed a hard social issue. Particularly what society does with those that are perceived to be monsters or outcasts.

Text:

“The only advice anyone can give is, if you want to be a writer. keep writing.  And read all you can, read everything.”

Sermon:

Writing is one of my passions of course.  People who talk about writing get my attention.  In truth one of my early instructors was Stan Lee.  Not just through reading his comics but he would have an editorial at the beginning of every comic I read specifically to that group or character.  I loved every moment of reading those.  I mean my friends would read comics but I think I was the only one in my group of friends reading the editorial notes and thinking about how the comics were produced.  The one message that came through is that everything started with a great story.

This is still true.  We have digitized just about everything, but the imagination that casts the original story is still in the writer. It wasn’t the super powers that caught my attention, it was the characters and the story they were in and Stan Lee recognized this.  That’s why his characters and stories survived while many other comics died and disappeared. No matter how cool your graphics, if the story sucks or the people can’t relate to the characters, people will not read it.

You have to be real when you write.  Stan had this thing for the real.  His most famous quote about this is that when it came to comic books he felt they were like boobs. They might look great on a computer, but he would rather have them in his hand.  I concur with this observation and I still feel the same way bout books and other things I read.  I like to sit in a chair and read them and I feel they should sit in my hand as real objects that books, comic books or magazines.  I also feel the same about boobs as well.  Some things have more reality than others.  The more senses you use the more real things seem.

The advice Stan gives to writers is two-fold – 1) Never stop writing.  Keep doing it.  2) Read everything you can.  Not unique perhaps but when you hear enough successful writers say this you begin to realize it is probably true.   As I am now considering writing as a career path, the advice seems more applicable.   It’s advice I will take to heart for the rest of my life.

See the source image

Closing Song: Avengers – Earth’s Mightiest Heroes – Theme Song:

If the X-Men took on racism, just about every issue along with that one, the Avengers addressed.  One of my favorite groups because the cast of characters was constantly revolving and changing,  It introduced me to a lot of characters and character development and as a writer I love that.

See the source image

Stan Lee, you cannot know how many of us loved your work.  You were more than a comic book artist or entertainer.  You were a person who inspired many of us to believe that a better humanity was possible.  That no matter how dark the evil might be, heroes would rise up from the human race and fight it. It was this notion that kept many of us from going off the deep end.  Your work inspired my imagination and for that I will always be grateful.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – Am I Happy?

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin) Day

Journal Entry:

I have heard a lot of comments this week from people who perhaps haven’t seen me in a while.  Mostly, I get the comment about how much weight I have lost.  I am guessing, because I haven’t stepped on a scale in a while, probably over 50 lbs.  The other thing I hear is “you look like you’re happier.”

I have spent a lot of time thinking about that statement.  The main reason I did what I did this spring and summer was I was tired of being unhappy and wanted that to change.  I identified what I thought was making me unhappy and began to shuck it off and found a few things I thought would make me happy and embraced them.  This was a very trying time for me in many ways, but I also discovered that there was a lot of relief. I think lies drain your happiness and when you stop lying to yourself and others, the strain of maintaining them gives a relief.

In the end, I discarded a lot of draining things.  In would warn other introverts who want to go into ministry that people drain you and unless you have a true way to recharge yourself, you will get to the point you are no longer happy.  I would say a bad marriage drains you.  I would say trying to maintain a faith you no longer possess drains you.  I was experiencing all those things and now I am not.  I am no longer in the ministry so I keep my happiness instead of giving it to others.  My marriage I much better and has shifted from being a drain on my happiness to a creator of happiness.  It is work, but that is something I am happy to see.  I am honest about my lack of faith in Christianity, but I find this actually makes me happier.  One axiom from Christianity that I still embrace is ‘the truth will set you free.”

There are still things that I struggle with.  I don’t like losing friends but that has happened. One ‘friend’ I now consider a two-faced, backstabbing traitor and that bothers me immensely at times. I personally feel this is going to make me trusting people at that level again very difficult.  I feel guilty about some actions in the past.  As I said last week, sometimes the wounds and bruises on my heart make me sad at times.  There is also the ever-present Grey.

That said I feel I am at a turning point.  I am being honest with myself to the point where the wounds of the past both on my self and those I caused cannot be cured by anything but time.  Some of them will never fully heal and I can accept that. Time doesn’t heal all wounds.  Sorry, I can’t base my happiness on being fully healed someday.  I can just hope that my soul will be as healthy as it can be at the time.  Perhaps that is where my happiness will truly find me. One can only hope.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

This weekend, I think I really began to see why for me working for someone will eventually be no longer be satisfying.  Mostly, I never feel self-sufficient in that situation.  The bucket list goal of owning my own business is the ultimate goal in this regard. I want something that will make me self-reliant completely and allows me the freedom to do the things I want to do.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

I do enjoy working for work sake.  I never thought I would get there but there is something about work that makes a person feel better like they are actually productive. I think I have found that in my job and I am starting to feel it coming when it comes to school work. With only five weeks left in the semester, it’s about time.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

Hospitality requires a measure of prosperity.  One thing that kind of stands out but speaks to the state of our prosperity is our living room.  I kind of envision a place where I can have my friends over to talk, drink and perhaps even have a support group.  A sectional couch to seat a dozen or so and a bar.  A reading chair as part of that. Television for me is not part of the equation but my wife would want one and then of course end tables and lamps.  Yeah, we have three folding chairs and a television that is small on a broken down stand.  I feel we will have started to have some prosperity when our living room reflects it.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading – 1 hour per day.
  4. Study / Homework – 1 hour per day or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Empty In Box
  6. Financial Transaction Input

Solid here and I am working on making sure things get done each day.  At the end of the week, how many times I skip something is reported and I eventually want zero there for everything.  As it is I am 85% consistent.

Goals: 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Graduate with Political Science Degree in December 2018.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of January 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

Now that my goals have a little more specifics, I feel better about them.  I can see something measurable and I have deadlines.  #1 is more important to me than anything and so I am thinking on how to do that better.  We have improved  a lot but there is still a lot of ways to go. The deadline on my Bucket List is pivotal and a game changer.  Hopefully #2 and #3 will resolve themselves in a few months.

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

It all comes down to one thing really – making more money.  Hopefully that will be the case in the next few months.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – Getting Specific

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day

Journal Entry:

It is in moments of crisis that the Routines and Goals you have keep you focused and allow you to chart a course through it.  This week I have had my car breakdown and come to the realization once again that my employer, a company I have worked for before, is questionable in regards to backing me up.  I really hate working for other people.  You are just vulnerable to their whims and it sucks if they clearly are more about the bottom line, than taking care of their people.

So, I refocus on my goals and readjust my plans. I mentioned though that my goals list is a little non-specific and that needs to change.  I usually discuss my goals under Business virtues but I think in order to do that I need to make the changes to being more specific now.

Goal List (current): 

  1. Strengthen Marriage
  2. Finish my Political Science Degree
  3. Advance Career
  4. Monitor and Control Finances
  5. Write for my Blog  – 1 post per day average.
  6. Exercise
  7. Follow a Solid Diet Plan
  8. Create and work a Bucket List.

I also want to add a goal about my 50th birthday (March 18, 2019) which is to be in the best health possible.  So a little revision:

Goals List (revised): 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Graduate with Political Science Degree in December 2018.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of January 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

I am hoping with these goals being more specific with measurable, deadline oriented results, things will go much better. This will be the goal list from now on and appear every Wednesday on Business Virtues.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – Be positive about my future

I have some recent challenges to this feeling of self-value.  I can’t go into details but the closure thing is still weighing heavy as well as trying to find something that give’s me value to myself. I have had to look to the future to find things that are positive, because the current situation in a lot of ways has become difficult suddenly.

I am working on being positive. I just get tired sometimes about the setbacks. I would just like things to go really well for once.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Have to say some things to my boss as early as possible this week. Things need to be clearly understood. I know what needs to be done and what the right things is so all that is left is to act.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times.

I am spending a lot of time in silence but there are those moments I know I need to say something.  That’s when courage comes in.  But the main thing is I need to get moving with pursuing what I need to pursue.  Facing the truth of my situation and doing something about it.

School needs to be a love for the truth,  I feel my blogging needs to head that direction as well. Finding truth, knowledge and wisdom is something I have always had as a part of my life and I think this should never change.  I want to be learning something on my deathbed, if it comes to that.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) and Principles
  2. Review Goals
  3. Review Bucket List
  4. Full Body Stretch
  5. Meditate on One of the Virtues
  6. Breakfast
  7. Supplements and Medicines
  8. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  9. Get Dressed for the Day

This is the one thing that is going well. Very well.  Probably the meditation could be a little more formalized but other than that, I feel good about everything here.

Bucket List:

  1. Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.
  2. Get My Tattoos.
  3. Actually Get Drunk.
  4. Smoke a Joint.
  5. Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
  6. Write My Novel.
  7. Learn Latin.
  8. Learn Hungarian.
  9. Weightlifting – Bench 225 lbs, Squat 315 lbs, and Deadlift 405 lbs.
  10. Start my own business

By setting a goal of accomplishing one thing on my bucket list every six months, I have kind of raised the bar here.  The question is which ones to work on every six months.  My best strategy might be to work on a few of them at all times.  If I were to pick the low hanging fruit of this list right now it would be to get my tattoos, get drunk, smoke a joint (more possible given that Michigan legalized recreational use) and write my novel. It’s doesn’t mean I won’t work on the rest, I am just actively trying to get one finished.  My first deadline is July 1st of 2019, so on these I have a little more time.

Recent events have reminded me of the reasons I wanted to start my own business.  There is a vulnerability in working for someone else that has just become unacceptable to me.  I don’t want to be put into a position where I must accept retirement or less hours, layoff, etc.  I want to be my own boss.  I know that has risks, but I would rather be at my own mercy than someone else’s.

Weightlifting:

My major concern here is my current gym might close.  I also have to think about where I might be in the future.  When it comes to gyms I have had to acknowledge that I am up in the air here for a lot of reasons, most notably is that I don’t know where I am going to be working.  My life is changing chapters and part of that is that my gym may very well change.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – The State of My Body

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Journal:

Well, with heart and mind finished it is time to turn to my body.  I must say when I look back at all the shit I went through this summer, I am glad I did focus on my body and health because it gave me a focus to work on through all that.  I still found a way to get to the gym regularly and I began to focus on nutrition.

I now hover slightly under 300 lbs.  I am six-foot four and I have lifted weights for a couple of decades, so I have a good deal of muscle mass, so I don’t think I will ever be able to drop below 250.  The lowest weight I achieved in the last ten to fifteen years is 285 and that was with a pretty extreme diet but it could have been tweaked because I still was eating a lot of carbs back then.  With my new diet, I am interested in seeing how low I can go now.

That said, my main measure of progress is not my weight.  It actually is standing naked in front of a mirror.  Yeah, that’s right because it’s the only way to give yourself and honest assessment and provide motivation.  You stand there until you can see clearly what the problems are and get mad enough to do something about them.  I still have three problems areas which are my inner thighs, my waistline and my pecs.  In the first and last of these there is a little fat still present but it’s surrounded by loose skin from the losses so far.  My waistline is definitely lighter but there is still room for progress.  Only time will tell if my skin will lay flat.

I as glad for the progress this summer but I am still making some now.  The real thing this summer was that my heart was wounded and my mind muddled but my body was doing good. It was getting stronger, leaner and feeling better.  It’s probably what kept me from completely losing it.

My diabetes was heading the right direction at my last checkup.  The real great unknown is that the only health coverage we could afford at the moment was something that covers if the shit hits the fan and not much else.  My doctor also has moved to clinic practice and I will have to find a new one anyway.  This is where I really need to find a new job and reassess things as far as health care, because I and my wife are at an age where things need constant monitoring at least a couple of times a year.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

There are two opposing views that work in my head all the time – The one in my head that says I can do better and the other one that says no one is perfect.  I believe in driving myself to be better, but acknowledging that Rome wasn’t built in a day, so it’s one step at a time thing.  So far I think that everything I can provide discipline for has it. I am constantly evaluating my development and how things are going.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

It could be said that I get up every time I fail.  That said, sometimes it can take a bit of time.  Time is not something I have a lot of these days.  It could be said that I am facing the crunch of the end of the semester and graduation looms, so as I also said on Monday watching my six a lot emotionally, so I don’t have a meltdown at the crucial time. Being able to take a hit and still be standing and moving forward is important right now and I need to be in that state of mind and heart.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

I get asked how thing are going between my wife and I from time to time. I can only say that we have our good days and bad but it’s more good than bad.  The observation I would make is that we are healing our marriage which both of us acknowledge was damaged by both of us which led to certain vulnerabilities.  It’s this process of learning to build again, to build loyalty between us and a wall around us that is our chief focus.

The situation kind of forces us to stick together. Thanks to the ministry, we are about 20 years behind all the rest of our friends of the same age as far as financial security.  Both of us have said it feels like we are back in Bible college times but we are older and wondering what time warp is this?  We either stand back to back or we are going to be in trouble, so that helps the fidelity question on our marriage.

The other areas of fidelity are solid and always have been at least on my side.  I actually have considered going through my friends list on Facebook and doing another purge.  There are just some people who are my ‘friends’ but I haven’t had any interaction with them for years. I keep my circle small.  I value loyalty as much as I try to give it.  I value it more than the number of friends I have.

Weekly Routine: 

  1. Weightlifting – 4 days per week.
  2. Cleaning – 3 days a week.
  3. Walking – 4 days a week

Seems solid other than when I have a class canceled or like this week my car breaks down and I had to skip a class, the walking needs and alternative.  Cleaning and Weightlifting will be finished Saturday so that is good.

Nutrition:

I have an intermediate goal that may find its way on to my goal list.  To be in the best shape possible for my 50th birthday which is in March. Nutrition is going to be a big part of that and I need to lock down my eating habits from now until then.  I have received more remarks this month than in a long time as to how much weight if have lost and how good I look.  A lot of that has to do with the Paleo Diet and intermittent fasting.

Weekly Recap:

Foundational – My heart is a wreck still but I have made some progress in learning how to heal, the need to find closure has been identified and I feel that even though this section of the NNV is in some cases my weakest, it is getting better.

Business – Really this is just working things as I try to finish my school and get a better job.  It’s about working the early stages of the plan to set a foundation for prosperity.  My mind is coming into focus but it really still needs some work and I am trying to do that work better.

Self – This is the best area of my life right now.  I feel stronger, leaner and better physically than I have in years.  Discipline is returning to my life and I feel good about that.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – My Bohemian Rhapsody

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

I went to see Bohemian Rhapsody last night with my daughter.  She became a 1980s music fan early on and so she definitely has a bridge between herself and her two parents that her two brothers do not have.  Although I do believe both my sons appreciate Bohemian Rhapsody as a song.  I can say that watching that movie with her is an experience I will never forget. My little girl is all grown up, but for a couple hours, it was just my little girl, me and the band Queen.

Freddie Mercury is one of those legends of music so powerful that even to today people listen to his songs and love them.  Queen was one of those bands that defied genres and still managed to do every single song thy did with skill, style and power.  I was a devoted Christian when Freddie died and all my Bible College friends were saying he was roasting in hell because of AIDS and homosexuality.  Peer pressure says that I had to agree with them to avoid scrutiny, but in one private moment I shed a few tears at the loss of Freddie Mercury.  Some people are bright stars that burn out way too quickly and Freddie Mercury was one of them.  Bohemian Rhapsody remains one of my favorite songs to this day along with tons of others from Queen.

Queen songs have these things called lyrics.  Real deep lyrics.  They also have something that is missing in a lot of others these days – talent that can’t be faked or altered in the studio.  It was one take after another until they got it right.  No auto tune, not electronic alteration.  Just guys with their instruments and voices played and sung well.  I miss that.

The movie ends with the Live Aid Concert that was probably the best concert of Queen’s career and probably the last time people saw the full showman that was Freddie. After that they did many great concerts but that one stands as the moment Queen ruled the world of rock and roll and Freddie was a living legend.  I can’t tell you how the human moment touched me once again and probably deeper.  When I first saw Live Aid as a teenager in high school, I watched it on MTV live and thought what a great moment in time.  Now that I know more fully the human struggle that it took for that moment to take place, I appreciate it even more.   I still miss Freddie.  He is someone I would have definitely liked to meet.

For me though such movies are a double edged sword.  They bring out my emotions and they cause me to do a lot of reflection.  Freddie made his mark because he insisted on what he wanted and fought for it.  He fought a lot with himself but he also in the end was both at peace with who he was and what he was doing. I want that and I don’t think I have ever completely had it. I have compromised a lot because greater things were at stake at times.  But this movie and Freddie Mercury have me thinking about living life without regrets and without compromise.  I want my Live Aid moment like Freddie had.  I don’t know what that would be for me but I want it and I don’t want to compromise to get it.

The problem with the past is it is something we edit and find the good or the bad moments rise to the top and every thing else fades away.  Bohemian Rhapsody the movie brought out several good moments for me but all of them are in the past and I want some more in the future.  It’s been a hard sleepless evening. Whether that is good or bad I guess I will wait and see. But my sadness is coupled with a longing to see Bohemian Rhapsody played out in my own life. A hunger and desire is building in me and I am sure the movie and those memories had a lot to do with it.

I don’t know if they will ever read this, but to the people who made the movie Bohemian Rhapsody – thank you.  If there was ever a life that needed to have a movie about him, its Freddie Mercury.

I also want to thank my daughter for taking her old man to see it.  Thank you, Bug.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – The State of My Mind

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin) Day

Journal:

My Mind – Not something people want to know unless you are part sarcasm, part dark humor and with a little asshole thrown in.  There is also The Grey to consider here, I debated whether depression is a mental thing or a heart thing but I would say it is a mental battle you fight to protect your heart.  The Grey is kind of the feeling I get during this battle. Sometimes it affects my heart, sometimes not.

This summer I found myself engaged in a lot larger dark thoughts than normal.  I was conflicted in a lot of ways.  On the good side there was an intense relief not to be in the pulpit anymore. An honest attitude and thought process began about my non-faith and more reasonable approach to life began this summer.  If it hadn’t been for my heart being drawn to something that ultimately hurt me, I might have been OK.  Hurt however makes it very hard to think until it wakes you up like a cold shower in the morning.

That led to the dark side of thoughts. I can’t say I am proud of what I was thinking at the time.  Mostly it was my desires driving my thoughts; which is why after I came out of this fog, I initiated my Wolves listening to the Ravens policy motto.

Right now, I am trying to get things back into focus.  It is not easy because I still want what I wanted, but I have to be very real in how it is going to be achieved.  In the case of mind the Business Virtues fit because it is about getting down to the business of life and thinking through how things need to be and what steps need to be taken.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

In being self-reliant there is an underlying philosophy of minimalism that I follow.  I am not an extreme minimalist but I do have two criteria for keeping things I own.  1) Is it useful to me and have I used it in the last year.  2) Does it give me joy. If I look at something and I cannot answer yes to either question, it disappears.

The reasoning behind this is that things can slow you down, weigh you down and cause you to make decisions that are not the best or to your advantage. It’s also why I don’t have pets at this time anyway.  I just don’t have the proper time or energy to give to a dog (don’t like cats) or say a raven. As I get older time is a most precious commodity, so I don’t want to spend it taking care of stuff that is not useful or enjoyable. This means it takes less to be self-reliant as well.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

Being efficient is an economics thing and I love economics.  I also love to create things and one of the things I am learning is the creativity of all work. There is something you are creating even in stocking shelves and that is opportunity for the product to meet the customer.  It makes all work enjoyable when you can see the creative part of it. Creativity isn’t just a product of heart but also the mind.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

The reason I would say hospitality is more of a mental thing than a heart thing is that to do it right you have to plan for it.  It takes real preparation for you to always be ready to help. To be in a position of abundance so that you can help others in need takes a long-term strategy and so that is what I am employing.

In part also is the need perhaps to host a support group of some sort maybe a year from now. I am not sure for what but I know that I started to slip mentally and emotionally when this left my life so I need it back.  The reason I say a year from now is I need to heal and rebuild some things first.

Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading – 1 hour per day.
  4. Study / Homework – 1 hour per day or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Empty In Box
  6. Financial Transaction Input

Pretty Good here.  Can’t complain too much anyway. If there is any weak spot its the homework and reading.  School is hard because the only interesting class to me this semester is Health Economics but only for  the Economics part, not the Health part. I am getting better though now that I look at each assignment in each class as a chance to be creative.

Goals: 

  1. Strengthen Marriage
  2. Finish my Political Science Degree
  3. Advance Career
  4. Monitor and Control Finances
  5. Write for my Blog  – 1 post per day average.
  6. Exercise
  7. Follow a Solid Diet Plan
  8. Create and work a Bucket List.

I am closest to the goal of finishing my degree.  The rest of these goals have a continual aspect to them and I am OK with that but it does call into question how do I measure them other than in terms of streaks of how long I have gone with each one.  I figure I can add a couple because like my bucket list I can have 8-10 things on it. I may also edit this list in the coming week so the goals are a little more measurable.

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

Still stage 1 but I feel that things can move forward although it is very slow.  Once I have a better paying job, I think I can actually work the first three parts fairly quickly.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!