“Last Week of Open Discussion – Part 1” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

Happy Tyr’s Day

Journal Entry:

Wow. Amazing sometimes how an image will trigger shit.  This microphone image, for instance, triggers a time where one of my old now-deleted blogs was my forum and it was probably my most popular blog, mostly because it was so raw. The Rabyd Microphone will live in my memory as a time where I was hurting very badly and let everyone know it. I seem better now, but at the same time, I have toned it down a bit which means I keep some things in, which is not good. Something I am going to write on for tomorrow’s Odin’s Eye.

Looking at the calendar, I want to time my routine discussion for the last full week of March before I launch some new goals and change some of my bucket lists. Because of this, I have this week as more of an open discussion on what the changes might be before I begin the more detailed ones starting next week.

Honor:

Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

I see no need to change the virtue or its principle here.  That has never been the struggle with honor.  Honor itself is a struggle of high difficulty all its own. it is having that feeling of value in yourself and recognizing it in others that is the challenge.  This has always been about being honorable by habit.

My goal here was to blog each day for a whole year with the desire that the blog would be an honorable expression of my life and goal achieved but now I continue the streak and we passed 500 days a long time ago. Now, I look for a goal that allows me to start honoring my commitments to myself. So now the issue is moving from being a blogger to a committed writer.  This is a commitment I want to honor to myself. What that goal will specifically be I don’t know quite yet, but it will involve honoring myself by being committed to being what I want to be.

The bucket list item will remain as it is.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

Honestly, I don’t see any changes here at all.  I want to keep the crossing one thing off my bucket list every year thing anyway and it is a goal that reflects courage.  The only question I have for next year is whether to up the stakes and make it crossing off two things instead of one.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Honestly Pursue, Accept and Speak Truth to All who will Listen.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

Once again the Virtue and the Principle are solid.  The goal is probably the one that will not happen because I really need to change this to reflect more of a writing habit than a specific end goal.  Or that the end goal is to have a habit of writing.  if I focus both my goals in Honor and Truth to this end I might see better results.  The bucket list item is already behind by a few books because I have trouble with my routines.  Not that they are bad routines or take a long time.  It is just right now my battle with my depression triggers is a losing one.

Higher Virtue: Love:

I know what I need to do right now, my depression is keeping me from doing it because I am once again in this battle between doing what is best for myself and what will not hurt others. I don’t like hurting others because it depresses me, but if I don’t act soon in love toward myself, that will continue to depress me.  The solution is to make the decision to love me and then walk through the emotions of others because that is the quickest and easiest way to feeling better overall.  I just hesitate every goddam time. I don’t like making others uncomfortable. I feel that shit and I don’t want to feel it.  But I also don’t like feeling like shit because I am not doing what I want to do either. One of these has to give or the problem will continue.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  3. Meditation – 5 min.
  4. Check Communications and Email.
  5. Paper Journal: Update To-Do List.
  6. Work Days: Dress in Gym Clothes: Go to Gym – Weightlifting / Exercise
  7. Shower, Personal Hygiene, Get Dressed for the Day
  8. Breakfast, Morning Meds.
  9. Rest Days – Morning Walk (weather permitting)

Like I said – this routine is good and would help me battle my depression. I just need more of the Virtue of Discipline in my life. right now and get past my feeling on it.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Learning Lessons from the Past” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

Happy Thor’s Day! 

Journal Entry:

In learning from the past what I concentrate on is my mistakes, struggles, and victories. In the area of Business, I have had all three of my goals for this 51st year of my life be crossed off. It has been a good year in that sense although not as successful as it could have been. I have made my mistakes regarding my goals and this is probably reflected in the Foundational and Self areas of my life more than here.

My struggles have usually come from not thinking through a goal or making the means I will accomplish it too specific rather than keep my options open. This lesson will definitely be thought of this time around as I think of what goals should be present for year 52.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved when each person is their own master and no one else’s’ .”

Principle: To walk in the spirit of independence by being my own master and no one else’s

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2020.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

This goal was a good solid win for me but next year the issue will be to actually have a job that puts this new degree I have to work. I also, considering all my bills still need a more white-collar job that makes far more money in order to make some headway.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I might put a writing goal here that involves developing the habits of a writer. Not sure what seeing have this in Foundational but I also might consider additional higher education.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

GoalBy March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.  (Goal Achieved

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I guess at some point I want to start giving back and I think my first charity would be to give back to The Clergy Project once I get myself more established.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Being fair with myself while being hard on myself is an interesting dichotomy.  But justice is best served when we work hard to gain something for ourselves. I have done this and I feel very much alive for it. The fact that my life is starting to turn around is a testimony to the virtues I seek to follow.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  4. Blogging – Organize, revise, post for the next day.  Write a new post for two days out.
  5. Writing: 1000 words/day.
  6. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  7. Check Communications and Email after 4 pm but before 6 pm.

I like this new routine as it puts some things in front of others that I will now probably do because of my habit of blogging being so ingrained and I want to get to it. I do have to point out until my new schedule kicks in fully, the old mixes with the new for another week or so.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Revising My Routines” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

Happy Sif’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

Sometimes life forces change and with my routines, a new job with a new schedule is going to force some changes in my routines.  Other changes were already being thought about because if I put things in front of other things that are more habit then I tend to do that and the thing that is a habit as well.  The idea is that in particular by putting my daily reading before writing on for my Blog, the reading will get done as will the blog.  It’s an experiment that happens to work for me.

The other change is now the daily word count for writing will be 1000 words until I get consistent with that and then I will raise the word count upwards as things get easier. I need to jsut be doing it every day and then expanding it to the point fo maximizing the word count without exhausting myself as a writer or person.  Blogging itself has to actually be done in such a way that I am two days ahead fo myself.  revising the psot for the next day and writing the one for the day after that.

The Morning. Work and Rest Routines have worked far better than any other method I have used.  The difference now is creating an option on the morning routine for exercise at the gym on workdays and taking a morning walk on rest days.  Moving from 3/4 time to full time means five workdays and 2 rest days on average per week.  My daily schedule as a department manager also changes from 4am to 1pm to 6 am to 3 pm.

After consideration of all these factors, the routines I have been following are revised as follows:

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  3. Meditation – 5 min.
  4. Check Communications and Email.
  5. Paper Journal: Update To-Do List.
  6. Work Days: Dress in Gym Clothes: Go to Gym – Weightlifting / Exercise
  7. Shower, Personal Hygiene, Get Dressed for the Day
  8. Breakfast, Morning Meds.
  9. Rest Days – Morning Walk (weather permitting)

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  4. Blogging – Organize, revise, post for the next day.  Write a new post for two days out.
  5. Writing: 1000 words/day.
  6. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  7. Check Communications and Email after 4 pm but before 6 pm.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  4. Blogging – Organize, revise, post for the next day.  Write a new post for two days out.
  5. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  6. Writing – 1000 Words

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

Discipline and Routine go hand in hand,  Most of the whole issue of my routines is about living the Virtue of Discipline.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

The real trick at this point it to persevere in my routines. That every failure in them; not only do I get up from, but that learn from those failures so I have them less often.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s moral philosophy, to one’s family, one’s friends, and most important to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends is valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

I need to perceive of following these routines as being faithful to myself.  Being Loyal to myself involves achieving my goals and seeing items checked off the bucket list.  Routine and Fidelity to myself need to be a part of my mediation for a while until it becomes a constant thought and later a habit.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

Wisdom is always an application thing.  In this case, I have a lot of experience now in revising my routines as the situation calls for it.  This was not catastrophic change and I think they might actually help out much better. Long term it might reveal the wisdom of making exercise a part of my morning routine regardless of schedule.  24-hour access gyms are good for that.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  4. Blogging – Organize, revise, post for the next day.  Write a new post for two days out.
  5. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  6. Writing – 1000 Words

New and revised, like all the rest – next week will be a good test for all of them.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 6

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  5. By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.
  6. Find a new, better paying job by March 2020.

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Another Goal Achieved” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

Happy Thor’s Day! 

Journal Entry:

I now may need to change my routines, so this discussion fo my routines has been suspended briefly as I reconsider them because I have achieved another goal – I have found a better paying job within the place I work.  It adds some new responsibilities that will boast my resume and both will increase my pay and moves me from part-time status to full time permanently even if this job ends.  Finding a new, better paying job – achieved.

That means all three of my Business Goals are achieved for the year. The process now is to set new ones in March. This leaves four left so I have passed the halfway point of the nine I set last year so progress is good and in the end, I will have more wins than losses.  My four remaining goals are below and in order of how likely I think they will be achieved:

  1. To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020
  2. Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.
  3. To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.
  4. To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

I can see goals’ 1 and 2 happening.  1 – I just need to finish doing what I am doing to the end fo the year.  2 – Get some money, make the appointment and get a tattoo on my body – done.  The question marks are over 3 and 4.  3 – I don’t think my diet is fully paleo but it works. I can seep perhaps I shackled myself to this Paleo Diet ideal and that was a mistake.  But it might be considered a successful failure as I havel sot weight and feel much better with what I am doing. 4 – Having a hard time writing every single day. The Grey is really interfering but al\so I need to develop the habits of a writer and perhaps that should be a major overarching theme for next year.

I guess I can see clearly 7 of 9 goals being achieved,  one partially achieved and one failure. a 7-1-1 record. Pretty good.   I have learned some things again about setting goals so this will carry over to next year.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved when each person is their own master and no one else’s’ .”

Principle: To walk in the spirit of independence by being my own master and no one else’s

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2020.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

I can’t stress how good getting this goal makes me feel. A good first step to something larger.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

The thing is I have a great idea for a novel and I would rather be writing that. I don’t know I need to rethink the whole fiction and non-fiction thing as a writer and ask myself some questions on how to motivate myself to do both while developing discipline about the writing process.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.  (Goal Achieved

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

On step closer to the bucket list item of owning my own home. but I will need an even better job for that. So another goal I can already see is to start to imp[orve myself once more.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I am trying to be fair with myself.  Frustrations can be self-directed at times but I am gaining some confidence back in my ability to provide for myself a better life.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, templates
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: 1000 words/day.
  6. Reading – 1/7 of a book a day
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.

As I said, all three of my routines are going to have to be revised in lite of my new job which has a different schedule.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Heritage, The Grey, and Dried Salt” – The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and The Wayfarer – Part 27

Happy Mani’s Day:

I should be happy with my life right now, but I struggle with it.  Things are getting better for my life all the time, but I feel something is missing in my life. Now those of you of faith need to understand this has been going on for a while and it isn’t the result of losing my faith as it precedes this.  Jesus never filled this supposed hole in my heart as much as I preached it was so.  Before I lost my faith in Christianity, it was this thing known as The Grey that was like clouds over who I was that indicated to me that I was missing something.

Heritage:

I have been studying my family history to see if there is anything in it that might indicate why this is so. I mean there are signs you can see in people by where they lived when they got married, the number of children, divorce, and death in a lineage that can tell you if things were rough or smooth for that person.  My continued use of Ancestory has proven to me that stories can be written and my lineage is varied but readable.

Some highlights:

  1. My father’s biological parents were people who eventually abandoned him.  His father because he was a drunk and his mother who knew she couldn’t afford him and his siblings.  The Bauman and Hole families are those legacies. The first family stretches back to Germany; the second is Dutch and Irish. I only know all this now because I discovered my biological grandmother’s (who I did meet while she was alive) maiden name and that opened the door to who she was married to and their parents. My grandfather was a drunk by all accounts and my grandmother found herself alone and on the streets.  She gave up my father for adoption.  She would go on to divorce two husbands and finally find a man who treated her well.
  2. This biological lineage has highlights but is noted most for its many marriages, divorces, and remarriages even at times when divorce was only allowed for infidelity indicating that infidelity was present. But also some of these remarriages are because a woman or man would watch their spouse die of some disease. There is a lot of sorrow on this side of the tree inflicted by the world and by self. I can see it and I don’t even know many details.
  3. My mother’s side of the family is far easier and better documented. It is a story of successful farmers, pioneers, and colonists. Most notably the Ackley’s who came from England to settle in the British Connecticut Colonies in the 1600s.  Many of them originally from Weymouth England and London.  They ended up coming further and further west until they settled in the Kalamazoo and Portage area of Michigan.
  4. Of course, my mother’s mom is even simpler and shorter.  The came from the Netherlands.  Like the whole family just picked up and left the Groningen area of the northern Netherlands.  My great grandparents and their parents all at the same time just got on a boat and came to America in the 1890s. They settled in Michigan and the rest is a short but powerful history of a family of Dutch Reformed people doing well in their new land.

So does heritage being this split have an effect on me? I guess I will wait for the DNA test results, to clear up the few loose ends that remain.  But right now the fact all of this is clearer should be something I am enjoying but other things seem to be pulling me into the Grey.

Depression: 

I believe part of it is where I live.  It has been mostly overcast and dreary this winter and that is never good for anyone with depression. I have been getting more concerned about my finances but it looks like a new job in my current company might help alleviate that short term for a bit anyway. My car and I went into the ditch and it is developing mechanical problems since.  I may need a ‘new’ one.  Life is intruding a lot right now and that triggers depression even if it is good.

Family trigger warning: Reading further might be a little too troubling for family members.  I am simply trying to get some things clearer in my mind and I find writing them and posting them does this, so hang on from here down. 

My marriage has definitely improved, but for me, there is still a lot missing and no matter how I try to fight it, I am becoming more restless every single day. The one thing for sure is whatever is missing, this improvement hasn’t fixed it, at least for me. I feel very much like I am giving up what I want to make my family happy at this point. I know what I want to do but I am fairly sure there will be a lot of pushback. This struggle, of course, causes The Grey.  That and thoughts returning from a lost love.

Dried Salt:

Miss Salty returned to mind due to posting a Facebook memory only to find her reaction to it with her name attached.  I guess feelings about her have solidified to a point.  I miss her; I care about her still, but I still wouldn’t trust her.  I know that sounds stupid probably, but the pain of this is still not gone.  I was looking at some old poems about her on this blog and the feelings are still there when I read them.  Although. I did manage to get through John Legend’s – ‘All of Me’ without crying once or shutting it off to avoid crying. She still haunts me like a ghost.

I avoid any sort of news about her, I haven’t even looked at her social media pages since June of 2019. I intentionally try to not think of her at times but she seems to come back in my thoughts more than I would like. WTF?  I should be a lot wiser from this whole situation but I miss that feeling I had and wonder if I can get it back. It is not happening with my marriage, improved though it is.

I guess I cling to this because, for a few months in 2018, I didn’t feel like something was missing.  This bothers me.  What was it that made me feel like I wasn’t missing something, because this relationship with Miss Salty, in the final analysis, was a shitshow?  How did this rollercoaster of an affair make me feel whole for once? For the first time, there was light in The Grey and I want to know what was it about this relationship that did that?  Can I get it back some other way?  All these questions are just made to order triggers for The Grey. I guess I have something to talk about with my therapist.

Walking the Grey:

True to form, Perseverance kicks in and no matter how I feel, I keep walking. I remain The Grey Wayfarer. Ravens of reason and wisdom overhead while following the wolves of what I need and want.  I search for the missing thing that will make me whole once again. Finding this wholeness is a large driving force and motivation in my life right now.  I walk the Grey because this is so worth it to me, I will walk in sadness for the rest of my life to find it.  Succeed or fail, it is worth that much to me.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Wayfarer’s Wells – Part 1” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues.

Happy Tyr’s Day

Journal Entry:

In searching for an analogy of the purpose of my bucket list items I would say the idea of places on a path that stops at a well where you get to stop, get a good long drink of life and can sit down and pause and reflect on how great life is.   They become these way rest points for the wayfarer’s weary feet.

Under the foundational virtues, the bucket list items are much more about journies – two literal and one of the mind. The issue of be ing a traveler of life comes I up and this is very important to me as I now believe this is the only life I get, so I want to live it to the fullest. At the end of it, I want there to still be my sights on the wayfarer’s wells up ahead.

Honor:

Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

This is my major hiking trip goal.  I want to do this as my first test of whether or not. I can be a true hiker at that point. it is something I want to do and enjoy.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

I went to Budapest in 2011 with my daughter.  I never really had time to explore the city, but it remains the only city so far I have been in that I enjoyed. I want to return, absorb as much of the culture as I can.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Honestly Pursue, Accept and Speak Truth to All who will Listen.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

This is a journey of the mind I want to take this year.  I sued to love reading but school kind fo ruined that which it always does temporarily.  But I feel those juices flowing again and there is so much new to absorb and read so.  I would also lek to be able to say – ‘yep read one book a week for a whole year.

Higher Virtue: Love:

Love for self comes up again.  I know it is winter and depression is a little harder to control in the cold and clouds right now, but it is more than that. There is so much I want to do and not a lot of time left when you really think about it in relation to my age and even though my health is good, I don’t want to take that for granted.  If I am going to love myself I need to start taking steps to make these things happen at a higher level. I am starting to feel stuck and that from a self-love point of view is not good.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Shower, Personal Hygiene, Breakfast, Morning Meds.
  3. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  4. Meditation – 5 min.
  5. Check Communications and Email.
  6. Paper Journal: Update To-Do List.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

I find the yoga/stretching with meditation time to be enjoyable. I wish however it was a true habit and I need to work on that.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Two Self Goals” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

Happy Sif’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

My self goals have always been about strengthening myself from within and without.  In the case fo a couple fo them this is literally true of my body, but I find the body, consciousness connection kicks in and those things strengthen more than the body.

Both of my remaining goals have one thing in common and that is they will not be said to be achieved until the very last day of march because both of them are, much like the virtues of self-discipline and perseverance they are based on requiring consistency over time.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

I struggle with the paleo Diet mostly because it would require looking at my wife and telling her we are dumping everything from the fridge that doesn’t address it so I don’t have things around me I can not eat. I would rather have the whole thing devoted to it.

In any case, the diet I am on is working but not completely paleo. This may be a case of a successful failure where the diet wasn’t achieved but the results indicate success.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

At present, I will mark this goal off at the end fo the year.  All three activities have been there.  Stretching most mornings.  Lifting when I am near the gym after work and walks when the weather is good. I don’t see this one not being crossed off in the end as long as I keep doing what I am doing.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s moral philosophy, to one’s family, one’s friends, and most important to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends is valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

GoalCelebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

My anniversary celebration was a high moment this year.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

The issue of wisdom addresses the most if lifestyle.  How one lives their life as a whole.  Generating new and better habits is a good lifestyle challenge but it means engaging a lot of wisdom and being flexible and adaptable.  Lasting change involves changing and tweaking but also simple determination.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  5. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  6. Writing – 3000 Words

I need to do this one more, but I tend to jsut collapse and vegetate on days off.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 5

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  5. By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“One Business Goal” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

Happy Thor’s Day! 

Journal Entry:

I have one major business goal left. It is pretty key so I am not diminishing it in my mind and from a confidence point of view, I am sure I need it to bolster my level of self-value at this point.

Getting a job that is better paying and is new to me at least is important from the standpoint of putting myself into a position of self-reliance and independence.  Things I consider very important as far as virtue is concerned. I would consider this goal completed if the job changes in nature and I gain more money by doing so.

People ask why I seem more fascinated by this kind of monetary prosperity and I would say that I am. My reasons are personal in that ministry makes you dependent on others for your financial support in higher ways than other jobs. I want to shake that off and start rising above the poverty mind of the ministry.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved when each person is their own master and no one else’s’ .”

Principle: To walk in the spirit of independence by being my own master and no one else’s

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2020.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

It really is about starting to be my own master and the author of my own fate.   This goal is key to that.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

The finishing of my degree in political science was one of the great moments of my life.  I just seem to be struggling with how to best utilize the knowledge. But it reminds me that goals can be achieved.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.  (Goal Achieved

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

By joining the Clergy Project I have joined a wonderful support group that has given me resources that I would never have received otherwise.  It has given me a lot of personal hope that life does have good people in it and the support I have received has been wonderful.  This was a kind of an unexpected surprise, to be honest. But also a welcome one.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I have to deal with issues of justice all the time but my goals have made them easier. The fact that I still move forward and make progress is something I can say makes my thoughts about past harmful actions done by both myself and others toward me much easier.  The progress here has not been about forgiveness so much as each goal is achieved the consequences others tried to visit on me become more laughable.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, templates
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: 1000 words/day.
  6. Reading – 1/7 of a book a day
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.

I want this to be better.  When I follow it, the day seems to go much better.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Two Foundational Goals” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

Happy Tyr’s Day

Journal Entry:

My rotation leads me to the week’s discussion of my goals and the two left in the Foundational Virtues are both important to me emotionally as well as practically.  Overall I have five out of my nine goals for my 51st-year of life left. The deadline is March 31st.

The first is to cross something off my bucket list under Courage and it is quite likely this will be the goal under the bucket list every single year. The idea is to always be making progress on my bucket list as a motivation.  The most likely candidate for this is getting my tattoo. I actually could do this with my tax return depending on how much it is.  I was hoping to have a better paying job to do this but if not then some money spent on my first tattoo.

The other goal is to finish the manuscript for one of my non-fiction books. No lie, this going to be a challenge now as mostly I find myself getting bored with one project and switching to another.  If I am going to finish this one I am going to have to bear down and finish one thing at the exclusion of writing on the others.

Honor:

Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

This blog actually has continued every day without fail since October 1st of last year. The streak is up to 478 days with this post.   A goal that has turned into a genuine habit.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

I read spoke at length about this goal but I would add here this is one of those very important goals.  Emotionally very important as it will mark a change from my old life to my new and burning the bridge at last.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Honestly Pursue, Accept and Speak Truth to All who will Listen.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

As a writer, this goal is emotionally important as well.  I have written a novel although it is too awful for publication without some major reworking of it.  What I haven’t done is write a non-fiction book and that needs to be conquered simply from an emotional ‘I can do this’ point of view.

Higher Virtue: Love:

The love for myself is both these goals. Emotionally it marks me caring more about what I want than what others think and feel.  I need to cross this bridge very badly for my own self-love’s sake.  I need to cross it and then burn it behind me.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Shower, Personal Hygiene, Breakfast, Morning Meds.
  3. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  4. Meditation – 5 min.
  5. Check Communications and Email.
  6. Paper Journal: Update To-Do List.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

Like this, it just needs to be more consistent.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Atheism and the Higher Virtues” – Of Wolves and Ravens – The Higher Virtues

Happy Mani’s Day

Discussion:

Turning to the B Side of my philosophical discussions we hit the Higher Virtues.  Of Course, this is the first time I have really considered Love, Justice, and Faith as an atheist, but there are some important points to be made overall.  I know I will handle each of these separately in the coming weeks; so I am not so much interested in defining them as considering them as a whole.

The concept of higher unifying virtues is something I introduced later after embracing the nine Noble Virtues (NNV). The idea was to simply ask the question of does the NNV combine into others and what place did Love, Justice, and Wisdom have?  The end result was that Each corresponds to the three of the NNV closely but all the virtues play into Love, Justice, and Wisdom.

There is an intention here of the highest purpose.  I am not leaving my life to chance by following the higher virtues, but rather make each decision asking those three questions: Is this loving?  Is this just?  Is this wise? The morse specific analysis is achieved by looking at the NNV when the situation is not clear in an area. This has been a proven form for me.

Atheists look at the practical side of moral decisions far more than others. they have no higher power to please.  NO higher authority to appeal to; so every ethical and moral decision is made by a great deal of thought. The virtues, including the higher ones, guide this for me specifically.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Needs (Geri):

Virtue became a strong need for me after leaving my Christian faith.  I have no doubt that others would have just said ‘fuck it’ and do what they wanted.  But I know that survival and prosperity of life are never achieved by just saying ‘fuck it’.   Everyone needs a code to survive and prosper.  Following the higher virtues is about intention.

Wants (Freki):

Prosperity and survival are the end results of the following virtues as a general rule.  Something that all of us should want and strive for. Virtue leads to this end and the ideas of being a loving, just, and a wise person just make that all easier.  Definitely, something I want.

Reason (Huginn):

I came in large part to these conclusions because of rationally considering what needed to guide my life.  No gods, no masters; just my own wants and desires guided by reason and wisdom. This lines up very well with the atheist rationality I have decided is the best course for my life.

Wisdom (Muninn):

That said, wisdom reminds me that human beings have an emotional side to them,  These passions need wise guidance. They need to have some virtue guiding them or they lead our lives to lack intention and effort.

Conclusion:

As an atheist, the Higher virtues now mean more to me than ever.  It is the simple asking if any action is loving, just and wise that has led to some great decisions.  It has also allowed me to avoid some of the pitfalls of living this life.  My hope is that this path will lead to the prosperity and wise life I am looking for.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!