Author: Ed Raby Sr

“Navigator” – Space Tramp – Chapter 11 (Megatraveller Fan Ficiton)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Story:

If there was one continued disappointment for Jeremiah is that many of his assignments had no bonuses to them.  If it wasn’t for the continued good pay of being a 1st Officer his savings toward owning his own starship would be very negligible.  As it was he lived a very Spartan lifestyle ( other than the once a month trips to whatever local bar and brothel there was on a system) and still put a lot away, but those missing bonuses were just not to be found in the standard route assignments he found so often in his life.

This last year he had easily found work as a first officer being the bridge crewman and pilot of the far trader known as Red Grasshopper III. They were on a route out toward the center of the Imperium but six jumps out would return back to Regina.  It was a well-known route and well patrolled by the Imperium so no trouble was expected.  It was however new to Jeremiah and so he learned some new things and saw some new places.

The captain was also the owner and played the role of that very well.  Senior Captain Largo Frogman, was a good captain with the right balance of running his ship with discipline, encouragement as well as striking a good balance between micromanagement and letting his crew free to do their jobs.  The Grasshopper was well maintained by her engineer and the steward/medic was top notch.  Jeremiah was the pilot and shared that with the captain. He sat in the navigation co-pilot seat a lot.

This was great for him as he began to fine-tune his navigation skills.  He smiled at his ability to come up with his own course routes through a system and jump coordinates were getting much easier. He could program the computer with the navigation himself. By the end of the trip, he took the Navigation Journeyman exam and passed so now both Pilot and Navigator had the word Journeyman next to them on his Free Trader ID card.

When they touched down in Regina a year after setting out, Captain Frogman thanked him for his hard work and excellent navigation.  He didn’t promise him a spot for the next voyage, but he was open to the idea if Jeremiah wanted it.

Jeremiah was uncertain because he was looking for something more lucrative than a simple Route assignment.  As much as he liked Captain Frogman he needed something more profitable and so he would chance it on a new assignment.   He gathered his gear and headed to The Naked Gypsy.

As usual, the bar/brothel didn’t fail to lift his spirits.  He ran into some dock workers he knew from back a few years and bought them a round of drinks.  After a couple hours, they left and he headed upstairs to the brothel.  He found that a lot of the girls that had been there when he had first started coming there were gone.  Madam Anabelle explained that many of them retired. Jeremiah shook his head – prostitutes retiring at 26 standard years was something he couldn’t fathom.  Lots of time on your back leads to time on your back sunbathing somewhere. It made him smile.

There was a new girl that caught his eye and he asked to see if she was available.  Mirana was as young as he had been when he left Strouden but she obviously has skills he had never thought of that age which he learned in the hour he spent with her.  He went next door and got a room in the hotel.  He checked the job list.  He needed something to make some money. When girls of the evening are retiring faster than you and you are a spacer, it’s time to double your efforts

Megatraveler Notes:

Start:

Free Trader 1st Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O4 – 1st Officer   Terms Served: 2

UPP: A67A74   Age: 27  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 2, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Streetwise – 1, Zero-G Combat-1, Handgun – 1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 5, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

Year Ten:

Roll for position availability: 9 + 1 for Intelligence = 10 – position available, serves as 1st Officer

Roll for assignment: 4 + 1 for Social 5- = 5 –  Route Assignment

Survival Roll: 7  – Survives.

Skill Roll: 8 – Skill acquired.

Bonus: 3  – No Bonus

Roll for Skills: (1 for skill roll) – Rolls Business Table rolls: 2 – Space cascade – picks Navigation – 2

Year-End

Free Trader 1st Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O4 – 1st Officer   Terms Served: 2

UPP: A67A74   Age: 28  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 2, Navigation – 2, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Streetwise – 1, Zero-G Combat-1, Handgun – 1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 5, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Virtue, Asatru, and Atheism” – Of Wolves and Ravens – The Nine Noble Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Discussion:

The question always is leveled at atheists – “if there is no god why should a person be moral?”  The question could be leveled back – “How moral can a person really be if they need a cosmic big brother to be moral all the time?”   But that is hardly answering the question.  The question assumes that morality derives from the divine or religion and to be honest there is a lot of evidence to counter this.  Most notably, that certain virtues and moral ideas occur universally in every religion and some religions might be better at extolling certain virtues but most virtues find themselves expressed in every form of religion and spirituality I know.  That is far more evidence of a human origin to virtue that religion has copied and persevered than morality came from religion.

For me, this is still evident in the fact that despite my ‘conversion’ to an atheist, I am still a follower of the Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) of Asatru because I can recognize the universal value of these virtues regardless of their religious/spiritual connection.  It has been said that religion was our first and worst attempt at coming up with answers to the great questions of life. If there is something good that came out of it, it is this recognition of universal values and virtues that humanity shares.

See the source image

So yes, I will continue to follow the NNV and write about them and make them a core of my philosophy. It isn’t about the spiritual side at all of being someone who practices modern Norse religion.  Rather it is about being the best human being I can be.   I still will draw inspiration that is very human from the stories of Norse mythology and the community that enjoys them. That is not the issue because ultimately it is about achieving what I need and want through being reasonable and wise.

See the source image

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Needs (Geri):

When I first started this blog I had a couple desires.  One of them was to determine what I needed as far as having a code that would allow me to operate without the totalitarianism of Chrisitan ethics.  I needed a code of life and the Nine Nobel Virtues entered my life as I searched through the warrior codes and the Asatru code of the NNV resonated with me the best.  It fit what I needed at the time and still fits that need today.

Wants (Freki):

What I wanted out fo a code was things that made my life better, notably at the time -stability of philosophy.  I wanted something that would lead me as a person to being better and to have a better and more prosperous life.  Once agian the NNV filled that role rather well and still does.

Reason (Huginn):

Atheism changes nothing other than I am not looking at Asatru as faith or spiritual form I live and practice but rather I practice Asatru because it leads me, much like many atheists who still participate in a religious community, to a sense rational morality within the framework of a community.  Rational moral virtue is my goal now and the NNV with a few small modifications will still provide that for me. The one thing that cannot be said is that atheism leads to a lack of morality because evidence shows the contrary.

See the source image

Wisdom (Muninn):

The wisdom of the NNV still finds itself with me as I continue to have the overall thought that Marcus Aurelius which has stayed with me.

Itis this wisdom that will keep me following the NNV regardless of my spiritual thoughts or belief in the divine. It is simply a wise thing to do.

Conclusion:

The Nine Nobel Virtues are one part of many things in religion that can be compatible with both my humanism and my atheism.  Yes, religion was our first and worst attempt at understanding life and the universe, but even a blind hog roots up a truffle now and then.  But it is my humanity and my reason that recognizes when religion has simply preserved something good from what humanity has created from itself.

See the source image

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“2000 Words” -A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Journal Entry:

Since writing my post for Saturday about National Novel Writing M0nth (NaNoWriMo) and deciding to use that month to instead do a Non-Fiction Book, I have been meditating on the 2000 words per day goal with that. I am now pretty confident t about that as I not only feel this is a worthy goal and one that is achievable for me, I feel it needs to be a daily habit to hit a word total each day.  The reason I say this is a far more concrete goal than writing for an hour that I have had before.  Because you can sit there for an hour and write only 500 words. I think the issue is making a goal that actually gives me daily progress.

To put it in perspective, my average post on this blog falls within 1000 words.  Pretty typical for me and that takes 30-45 minutes to write and then probably another 15 minutes to edit. If I follow my pattern of letting a post sit a day and editing it again the next day, that’s another 15 minutes.

Writing a book is a different matter because the editing for me would be akin to sitting down for hours and reading the material and editing it all in one go. So I could just follow the NaNoWriMo philosophy and just write and get the 2000 words in an hour or at the most an hour and a half. Very much possible if I put off some personal entertainment and get about the business of writing.

This week I will be hitting my principles in A Skald’s Life so that will be reflected bellow.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

I guess I find it easier to find personal honor in others than in myself.  I am an observer of people and I find what is good in a far different way than before.  Honor is a feeling of value and it is far easier to find value or how people are valuable when thinking about others for me.

It is finding value in myself right now that is a challenge.  I just am struggling with that right now. I need a new life in the sense of having a new place, job and environment I think. It is why I am going to be expanding my job search for most of the country.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

Philosophically, I don’t struggle so much with acting once I know what the right thing is, it is determining the right thing. I was told recently I am a little bit of an enduring asshole. That is a reflection of a little less tolerance for bullshit in my life and standing up to it.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

I think sometimes people have taken aback that I tell the truth a lot, even when it makes me look less flattering.  They are probably used to lies and accept them as part of life from others. I just don’t have it in me to lie to people anymore.  I spent a lot of my last three years of ministry, fronting a lost faith and have no desire to front anything anymore. What you see is what you get with me; take it or leave it.

I still struggle with what the truth is and how to deal with it.  I realized three months ago I was wrestling with whether I believed in any god at all and only recently accepted I don’t and to be honest the world could be here without god at all.  If there is a god, he is either one that doesn’t give a shit or we are just an experiment in a petri dish to him.  He isn’t benevolent that’s for sure. I have no evidence, in any case, to believe so until some evidence is given, I am facing the truth that I am for all practical and philosophical purposes an atheist.   So I am an Athiest Humanist with Pagan tendencies. 🙂

Higher Virtue: Love:

Love for the people who are important to me – check.  Love for self – hesitation to check. I am at a love crossroads regularly.  I need to take the self-love fork soon or there is going to be a problem.  I will get too close to the cliff of self-sacrifice to death if I don’t take the self-love fork at a certain point.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Shower, Personal Hygiene. Morning Meds.
  3. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  4. Meditation – 5 min.
  5. Check Communications and Email.
  6. Paper Journal: Create a Daily Log and To-Do List.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

I like this routine now better than before.  It allows me to get the basics done and be ready to go through the day.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Hel / Hella – Goddess of Death” (Asatru – Part 16) -The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sol’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not given to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: “Helvegen – The Way to Hel” Wardruna

Meditation:
Image may contain: one or more people and text
Text:

See the source image

If you want more details about Asatru, I can’t recommend this book enough.

Sermon: 

Somewhere along the way the depictions of Hel or Hella, to differentiate her from the realm she rules, became a half beautiful woman and half corpse.  But the original description of her in mythology simply has her half black and half white. The one thing is for sure a lot of elements Christianity crept in as time passed as regards her realm more properly known as Helheim.  She is the goddess of those who die of natural causes and not in battle. Her realm is mainly described as a continuation of this one but forever.  Forever, of course, being defined as until Ragnarok when everything basically hits the reset button.

Hella is in a couple stories of significance.  First, her origin story which has her as the child of Loki and a giantess. It is in this story that she is placed in charge of Helheim by Odin himself.  Her spheres are not pleasant ones – sickness, famine, old age.  Her artifacts reflect all of this.

The other story is, of course, the story of Baldar who ends up, somehow even though he died in battle,  in her realm.  The gods attempt to appeal to her for his release.  Her condition is that every person must weep for his death.  Loki, of course, has a hand in making sure one person does not and  Balbar remains with Hella. She also is in charge of keeping Fenrir the great wolf bound until his release at Ragnarok. It is interesting how much she figures into the story when it comes to the end of things and perhaps that is her real sphere – the end.

To the followers of Asatru, Hella is venerated not as someone to be feared.  She is simply one of the options one might find oneself in when you reach the afterlife.  Her real job is to offer comfort to those who have died and give them rest from the toils of this world.  The people who live in Helheim admire and respect her.

For me, she offers an interesting paradox of a character.  Of dubious origin being the child of Loki, she fills the role fo bastard daughter who finds herself in a position \of power and thus both loved and feared.  Her personality might be a little brooding and gloomy, but given her job who can blame her.

In my writing when I have depicted death allegorically or as a traveling companion to the hero, I find she always takes the form of a woman and I have to say this is due ot Hella’s influence. I see her as not only gloomy and foreboding but with a dark sense of humor who occasionally can find laughter in the ironic particular as regards death.

Parting Thought:

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I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“NaNoWriMo and 2020 Reading List” – The Rabyd Skald

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day!

National Novel Writing Month?:

I have done National Novel Writing Month in November many times, I have also succeeded twice. As we approach November this time I haven’t participated in the last few years as I was focused on school and writing for that.   That said, I could do this but I am conflicted because I could also use the same concept for my Non-Fiction Book as a major restart and massive getting the work done time as well.  So is it National Non-Fiction Writing Month instead?  I think so and it has the same acronym.  My plan is basically also to do 60,000 words too.  That makes it easy with 2000 per day.

Recently though I realized my first non-fiction book should not be a scholarly work but rather my own story of my journey from faith to atheism.  It also has the flavor of being something I can do without a lot of research.  It’s my story or at least my memories of my story and that inspires a lot of the possible titles but I won’t get into that yet. What I  do know is that there is a high probability that this time next week I will be writing this book. By the end of November, I plan to have it mostly there.  December will be finishing it up and polishing.  Then I will sit on it in January and then Edit it in February.  I guess this is a good process that would allow me to produce and edit a book every three to four months and I think this is a good habit to get into.

I want to use the concept of NaNoWriMo to get started.   Eventually, as a writer, I can see a month to write a book, one month to let it rest while starting something else and then a month of editing.  Having one book being written while a second is being edited sounds like a good way to go.  It would lead to three books in the creative forge at a time but that is the life of a writer.

2020 Reading List: 

A week or two ago I changed my bucket list item under Truth form learning Latin to reading a book a week for the year 2020.  it’s one of those ‘so I can say I did it’ bucket list items. But also I have a lot of catching up to do when it comes to my education.  So at the present time, I am looking into not only starting the habit of reading a book a week but also putting together my reading list ahead of time os that part won’t take a lot of thought other than to order the books in enough time to get to me.

Mostly I am looking at books under a couple veins but they have to be new to me in that I have never read them before.  This has to be a reading list, not a re-reading list.  I also am trying to hit a variety of topics but I have a couple themes

  1. Books that at one time were burned by religious people.
  2. Books on science particularly evolution the origin of life.
  3. Books by the Founding Fathers – I have read the federalist papers or at least most of them but some of the books by the founders like Thomas Paine’s Common Sense I have actually not read.
  4. Books on Economics and Political Science
  5. Viking Mythology and Culture (duh)
  6. Not to forget fiction – science fiction and fantasy probably but new stuff I haven’t read before.
  7. It’s going to be half non-fiction and half fiction.
  8. Half my fiction will be fantasy and the other science fiction.
  9. No book I am going to read in 2020 can currently be in my library.  I am using those books to get started the next couple of months to develop the habit. But the process of buying a new book and reading it is part of this.  I will make a few exceptions for books I just purchased for this purpose but other than that, I am going to read new shit.

Looking at this, I would say that it’s going to be a pretty eclectic list and I need to have it down before I start.  I do want to deal with one book I have put on this list because of #1 and it is a modern book: The Founding Myth: Why Christian Nationalism is Un-American by Andrew L. Seidel.  And the video below which was posted yesterday explains why.

Yeah. book burners piss me off. It tells me your afraid of what it says might disturb your precious world view.  It tells me ‘goose-stepping morons should try reading books instead of burning them’. 

My 2020 List So Far: 

The Founding Myth: Why Christian Nationalism is Un-American by Andrew L. Seidel.

Common Sense by Thomas Paine

 The Age of Reason by Thomas Paine

Leviathan Wakes, Caliban’s War, and Abaddon’s Gate by James S A Corey

Origin of Species by Charles Darwin

Outgrowing God by Richard Dawkins

Letters to a Young Contrarian by Christopher Hitchens

Norse Mythology by Neil Gaiman

It’s a pretty good start, but I plan on getting this list done before Yule so maybe they can be gifts to me.  🙂 I will probably organize this later to make sure I have a good mix but in the end, it is going to be what I want to read. Although I am interested in books that people have burned and they go to the top of the list.

I am planning on using Goodreads to document my progress and write reviews on the whole thing.  If you follow my Facebook page, you will get each review.

Closing Thoughts:

If you haven’t noticed Sif’s Day has become pretty much whatever I want to write unusually under the moniker – The Rabyd Skald.  I kind of feel this is needed right now because I am using it to fill gaps in my thoughts and the normal weekly process. I just don’t always feel like doing something ordered so the end fo the week is getting the last bits of Choas out of my brain.  Hope you don’t mind.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“A ‘Dirty’ Mind”- Freya’s Chambers – Sexual Imagination

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day:

Disclaimer:  The topics covered in Freya’s Chambers include serious discussions of sex, sexuality and related issues.  If it isn’t your thing; you can move along, otherwise enjoy and feel free to discuss.  Given the nature of some subjects be prepared for nude images as there may be some.  I avoid genitalia as a general rule but is not always possible.  

Discussion:

See the source image

I am introducing a new topic subheading called Sexual Imagination.  Basically, how the mind and sex are connected.  I am going to start with a simple concept – having a ‘dirty mind’.  Does this really exist?  Is it normal or bad?

See the source image

Back when I was a  Christian, the ‘sin’ I struggled with the most was lust. No getting around it.  I eventually dealt with it by simply being real about it and changing my viewpoints on a lot of things.  It probably had something to do with my deconversion as I began to realize what made sin such a made-up concept was that it involved such impossible tasks as not ‘lusting’

I would now say that humans have developed a high desire to procreate so that the biological needs to be sensually drawn to another person is normal. That does change your definition of what it means to be ‘dirty-minded’.  I mean there is little actual dirt to having sexual thoughts and only religion with its cultic desire to control others through sexuality would try to defy that.

Without Sin:

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Boiling things down to biology helps in taking the dirty out of dirty-minded for yourself.  Without sin what you have is thoughts that cross your brain when you see, hear or feel something that causes you suddenly think and feel sensual.  Not sin, just normal sexual desire.

Well, I should define normal as best I can.  I am not sure having a desire for sex with children is normal or a desire for rape.  It might be normal in the sense scientifically it can be proved statistically normal, but whether or not culture or society or basic decent humanity at times defines a sexual thought as ‘normal’ might be another issue.

See the source image

Psychology aside most of us have sensual thoughts that range on the normal side of seeing or hearing something and translating it into a sensual or sex-related situation.  Whether it is seeing a picture that you first think is someone doing something naughty or you hear someone say something and immediately think to yourself some sort of sexually related joke, it is all signs of a healthy but perhaps overactive sensual imagination.

Sensual Imagination:

See the source image

I have had all my life and overactive sensual imagination.  This is particularly when someone says something that could be taken into the sexual realm with a minor change in the way of looking at it.  A woman says: “I will leave you to put that thing in there.”  and my mind goes: “That’s what she said.”  Easy as that and sometimes far worse. Ok. many times far worse.  I keep a lot of it to myself but it keeps me entertained where my mind goes these days.  If there is any change, I am no longer mortified by some of the things I think unless they truly cross a line and I think to myself.  “No way you’re telling anyone that one.”

Visually I am probably pretty typically male. I see a nice feature on a female and you bet that leads to some ‘sensually imaginative’ thoughts.  I think I can say, with a lot of high probability, the following 1) If I don’t notice and nice ass, 2) If I don’t notice a nice pair of boobs and/or 3)  If I don’t notice a woman’s curvy figure and such a thing is absent dirty-minded thoughts; then it is time to call the morgue and tell them to send a truck for my body.  I have obviously died and haven’t fallen over yet.

Filters: 

See the source image

I do have my filters:

  1. I never say anything dirty in mixed company unless know the people first
  2. Most of the time I never lead with sensually imaginative comments, I wait for others to do so or for it to come out in regular conversation from someone else.
  3. Never around kids, although kids do say some funny things that if you are not careful you could go there.
  4. I double think everything when alone and out of sight with the opposite sex who is not my wife.  My wife, however, has to endure. 🙂
  5. People easily offended?  – Nope, not going to go there with people with a stick up their ass.

Of course, filters don’t always work when the situation is such that the environment just invites sensual thoughts. Some thoughts, however, are Not Safe For Work and so I keep them to myself.

Conclusion:

See the source image

Basically, I am saying I don’t fight this anymore, I just try to make sure that it is in good fun and not being hurtful.  Knowing your surroundings and who is around you is a good way to avoid the consequences in our society, which is hypersensitive these days.  Mostly though you are pretty much a normal person in my opinion even if your imagination is overly sensual.  Just be careful out there.

Honestly and seriously though, we are sexual beings as human beings, which means our mind is going to head down that path from time to time.  Some of us just like going down it a lot.  Nothing wrong with it just make sure you have some filters and sometimes remember this is about your own entertainment far more than not.  It makes you walk the path with a few more smiles on your face.

So, how ‘dirty’ is your mind?

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“I Think Another Goal is Achieved” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

I think I have achieved my goal under hospitality.  I am writing about it here because I think we will see the goal of being part of a support group of some kind crossed off. I wanted to make a not of it from a journal point of view.

I heard about the Clergy Project from reading the book Caught in the Pulpit several years ago. I never felt I fit because to be a part of it you have to have two qualifications: 1) You have to be a former minister of some type and 2) You have to have no belief in the supernatural or god.  I wanted to make sure of the second one before I attempted to join.  They have a vetting process.

There is no one that understands the whole issue leaving the pulpit and faith like another person who has done it.  I knew I was in the right place as soon as I started talking about stuff on the forums and looking at the resources.  It may be very possible to get some job help and some counseling at least for a little while through the transition.  Finally a little hope.

It is funny though because some people who are part of it are still in the pulpit and have no faith.  That’s why the secrecy because churches tend to not be very understanding of a minister struggling with faith and their career.  That’s why this will be the last post about it and I will not reveal the process to join.  In any case, it looks like another goal achieved and this is a group that can go with me anywhere I go – a definite plus.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

Discipline is lacking these days and it has a negative effect.  I need to spend the weekend doing a couple things to get back on track and stick with it.  I mostly need to understand in my heart the value of discipline.  My brain knows but my heart is the one that needs to understand this to stay motivated with this.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

I don’t get it, but I keep going.  Perseverance is rarely an issue.  I just wish I would not have to face so much to keep going.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

I am loyal to my gods – the fact that I have none. If I have an idea I gravitate to that fits being loyal to my ideology at this point, it is ‘no gods, no masters”.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

I wrote on wisdom already this week so I will leave it at that.  Other than to say that I feel joining the Clergy Project was a wise move for me.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  5. Reading – half an hour for enjoyment.
  6. Writing – 1 hour

I am a writer.  Theses changes reflect that and are good ones. Now I just need to get back to discipline.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 4

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Three Tattoos” – Rogue Wizard – The Fire of Fury – Part 18

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Thor’s Day!

Rogue Wizard’s Journal – October 1st, 2019

Well apparently my hunches are not that great, but still can’t shake the feeling we are being observed.  Lunette pretty much said it was possible but there was nothing to be done but to try to stay alive.  She has been doing this far longer than me os I defer to her judgment. September left us and now October and the changing leaves are with us.

The results of a small cabin, three people in love and regular naked sauna baths are a greater intimacy in a very short time. The three of us are very close now and quite intimate. There is also the potential for cabin fever which will come when the snows fall.  To combat this now, Lunette suggested a few excursions and finding an old friend of her parents managed somehow to procure us and old Ford Pickup.

This opens up a lot of possibilities not the least of which is all of us throwing our backpacks in the back and taking off.  But for now, we have used it to make a few trips.  The most notable of these was to a mystic tattoo artist in a major city about 75 miles away.

Magical tattoos are the combination of alchemy for the ink and enchantment magic.  There has always been a little bit of magic to a tattoo artist and the mages of the world have been going to mystic ones for a long time.  They actually have their own wizard family – The House of  Minerva.  Well, this is the house of all people who use art and magic in combination.  It should be noted one’s house is more based on magic preference or philosophical preference.  It is hereditary for some mage families.  Mostly though you pick one at age 12.

The tattoo artist we went to a lovely tattooed lass with a purple mohawk was House Minerva but part of the underground.  Sadi can cuss and drink like a sailor.  I know we would go out with her after work at the local bar.  Lunette and her have worked together a couple times. She is also a wizard with tattoos in the fact she is both a top-notch alchemist and an enchantment magic specialist.  I now sport three tattoos of hers.  This process took about three days.

The beauty of all of them is that they enhance my magic.  Two of them in very powerful ways. The third is a link between the three of us.

Now going around my right wrist is a circle of small Viking axes.  Guess what it does? It enhances my Evocation magic and boy I wasn’t expecting the change in the color of my flame but it is color is now bright blue with white.  I checked my lightning and it is red instead of bright yellow and my frost has gone from pale blue to pure white.

On my left wrist is a circle of interlocked Viking shield like a shield wall.  It’s cool because each shield is unique.  It enhances my Abjuration magic. Yeah, my shields are even stronger and they also have changed color or should I say change colors – shimmer like a multicolored rainbow now.

If I hold my hands together then the two tattoos enhance each other is I am doing only one or the other of my types of magic. Makes fireballs even more spectacular and shields even harder. I just can’t do both types of magic at once when I do that.

The last tattoo is one all three of us received.  Required a few drops of blood form each of us mixed into a potion that was then dabbed before dabbing the ink. Its three hearts interlocked in a triangle and all of us three are wearing them on our right shoulder blade. Each heart represents one of us.  Lunette’s is fairy-like with purple and black strands interweaving.  Amber’s is a red flaming heart much like her tramp stamp.  I wasn’t sure what to put for mine but Sadi looked at me a moment and did one on paper and I smiled.  The heart was made up of dark grey strands mixed with silver.   Very cool.

Each one is unique as mine has my heart at the top and the two others interlocked below it.  Lunette’s has hers at the top and mine and Amber’s bellow it and Amber, of course, has hers on top and mine and Lunette’s below it.  The main effect is if I concentrate I know where both of them are even if they are out of sight.  I also know what they are feeling, but that is unique to me as I am empathic. Lunette and Amber say they don’t feel anything.

We are back at the cabin now and the tattoo process was not as painful as I thought. Like getting scratched but all for a good cause.  We need all the advantages we can get if the shit hits the fan.

Writer’s Notes:

Don’t have anything to say at this point other than I can’t wait to get my own first tattoo.  I was hoping to write this chapter after I got my own so I could weave some of my feelings about it into this, but I may have simply rewrite it later. 

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Pagan Holidays: Winternights / Halloween/Samhain – Part 2” – Odin’s Eye

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin’s) Day.    

Discussion:

I am going to talk about modern Halloween and why it is now my favorite holiday.  Mostly it is because for a long time I was told as a Christian that it was satanic or full of witchcraft.  It is a Wiccan holiday in its original form but also pretty basically pagan as well.  Much fo what we see is hold over symbols from a bygone age that survive in large part because it is a fun holiday.

In the United States, the retail business has realized something – it is the second most money grossing holiday of the year.  Literally, second only to Christmas now.  Easter has fallen to third and Valentine’s fourth. It has become more than a holiday for kids trick or treating.   Adults here have very adult Halloween parties without the kids.  I mean you are dressed up as something else and often people cannot tell who you are if you do it right.  Add alcohol, candy, and sensuality and you get the modern American US Halloween.

Most 0f the pagan roots of this holiday are lost and that is probably, on the one hand, Ok and on the other hand. something for those of us that like to dig deeper is missing.

Oh, yeah I am using the pin-up girls again for this one. This time though vintage classic ones that I love.  It’s not very politically correct, but 1) it’s Halloween and 2) I don’t give a fuck what the language-thought nazis say.

See the source image

Time to Look Through the Eye:

“To see the truth, change one eye for another”

Faith:

I am going to deal with the more Wiccan holiday of Samhain in this one that is now modern Halloween.  This is actually the biggest festival of the Wiccan calendar and thus most celebrated.  It’s opposite number and Spring festival is Beltane.  You might say these two festivals bookend Summer and Winter.  A festival of the dead, spirits and thus full of the familiar phrase – trick or treat. This reflects their appeasement of those prankster spirits and thus have them pass over your place.  The Jack-o-Lanterns and many other customs reflect this.

I don’t believe in the supernatural but I find the whole holiday interesting because it is such a quilt work of different pagan traditions that it is fun to guess where which tradition came from and how it came to be.  I have faith this is a fun and interesting holiday.

Meditation:

Like  Beltaine, I feel that this holiday reflects the very human need to blow off steam.  We can’t be good all the time and sometimes you just need to go and be a little naughty and mischevious.  Beltane is perfect for this and Halloween even more so. My meditations on human nature simply lead me to think that people need to stop being so good for a couple days a year and Halloween is one of those days.

See the source image

Theology:

Growing up this was Satan’s holiday. We didn’t participate or were told not to.  my father this was bullshit, Chrisitan though he was.  He was the one that told me that there is a great deal of difference between what something was and what it is.  He felt what Halloween is now was more about having a good time and in some respect connecting with your neighbors.

Of course, the average Wiccan doesn’t believe in or worship Satan any more than they do the Chrisitan god.  But people have a way of trying to make you inferior for a stupid reason like they don’t do holidays like this while you do; so you are morally less than them.  Got sick of this shitty theology long before I left Christianity.

See the source image

Spirituality:

I do find the idea of appeasing the spirits to be an interesting spiritual concept in paganism. The one area of Norse mythology that is rich but extremely complicated so I don’t address it is the whole issue of earth spirits, elves, and dark elves.  It would be a fascinating study and probably relates to Winternights and Halloween a lot. I just look at it with awe as to how complicated it seems.

For myself, the connection with the past, the spending time with people as a community celebrating something is enough.  It is these connections and having fun with them that denote my ‘spirituality’.

See the source image

 

Conclusion:

Why do I like this holiday so much?  Because of all the holidays in the US calendar, it has nothing to do with God, Christianity, Patriotism, or anything like them.  It remains truly pagan despite Christianity making November 1st All Saints Day.  Halloween gives November 1st the middle finger and that just makes me smile.

I also like the grey side to Halloween – the naughty side to it.  It gives new meaning to the words – ‘trick or treats?’ and that is very Ok with me. Just remember sometimes the answer to that question is – yes.

See the source image

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Borrowing Perseverance” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

Perseverance is a Self Virtue in my system but I need to borrow it for business for a bit.  Mostly there have been new rounds of rejections for jobs and I need to take a deep breath and go at it again.  My issue is that this is a little discouraging and I am trying not to let it bring on The Grey right now and that means getting up and continuing to go forward.

I am thinking of another angle as well.  I am very much upset about the amount of time I wasted on something that was very false and phony as a career now.  I see Christianity for what it really is – one of the most colossal frauds ever.  It wouldn’t; bothe me so much but I wasted probably my most energetic and productive years doing ministry as a Christian pastor and now have to find a new way forward.  I decided given my atheism to join The Clergy Project, a support group for ministers who have no belief in god anymore.  I am hoping to find the connections I need to move forward a little better.

My Business Virtues are about being independent, hard-working and hospitable with the excess of my prosperity. The job I need has a  few requirements but most notably that it has to allow me to write and to be active in things as well as making me a little more money than I am now.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

I believe in liberty and freedom not just for myself but for anyone.  I believe in freethought being the way to liberty.  If I could find something that allows me to advocate for this, that would be awesome.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I always enjoy working.  I enjoy coming home afterward too but the work causes me to appreciate the downtime more.  I like to be efficient and some of the things that bother me at work are when I can see things are not efficient and there is no way to fix it.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I have no aversion to helping others, I just lack the means to do so and the cause that would be something that would help me focus on what I want to do in this regard.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

It’s all about being just in every relationship I have. At least, just on my side of things.  My part fo the relationship needs to be me acting as fairly and justly as possible depending on what happens in each one.  A simple goal but difficult to achieve.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!