Nine Noble Virtues

The Rabyd Skald – The Big Picture and Depression Triggers

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

The Planning part is done.  Virtues, Routines, Goals, Plans, etc. are all finished as far as initial thoughts.  Now is the time for to get the big picture and make a final plan which is how I am going to maintain this and monitor it.  Of course this is what this blog and blogging in general is all about for me.  I have three journal posts each week and my notebook, which is how monitoring this is going to take place.  There are also adjustments that need to take place as things are crossed off my lists as accomplished and life changes from time to time. Mostly though I will be using the three A Skald’s Life posts each week to keep track of things and stay motivated. Today is the big picture of how that will work and at the end something personal because it doesn’t really fit anything else.

A Skald’s Life – Foundational – In each weeks Foundational Post, I will be discussing the Noble Virtues of Honor, Courage and Truth.  I think it is also a good place to discuss the Morning Routine, Bucket List and my Weightlifting Plan. Like all my journal posts is will start with a basic journal entry of what is going on.

A Skald’s Life – Business – In each weeks Business Post, I will be discussing the Noble Virtues of Self-Reliance, Industriousness and Hospitality.  I think it is a good place to discuss the Daily Routine, Goals and Budget Plan.  It also with start with a basic journal entry.

A Skald’s Life – Self – In each weeks Self Post, I will be discussing the Noble Virtues of Discipline, Perseverance and Fidelity.  I think it is a good place to Discuss the Weekly Routine and my Nutritional Plan.  Having one less thing I will probably be looking back at the week as a whole in the basic journal entry which usually takes longer.

The last tool is my notebook which basically has check lists for the Routines and copies of the Virtues, Principles, Goals, Bucket Lists and Plans.  I keep these in front of me every day in the Morning Routine.  These Journal Entries are about marking progress.

Depression Triggers:

I know is might be strange to switch to this topic but The Rabyd Skald Posts are about what doesn’t fit into the other posts that are more standardized.  I would also say the reason I am doing all the Virtues, Goals, etc. is that it is my way of constantly combating my depression and keeping the things that trigger it at bay.  So perhaps is does fit as the overall goal of keeping myself walking through The Grey and still accomplishing what I need to accomplish – It is truly about being The Grey Wayfarer in that sense.

My depression is not as severe as many others.  I can function in the middle of it. It just makes me get moody and difficult to deal with at times.  It basically makes me feel either slightly sad or nothing.  That is I have this feeling that everything is either a waste of time and it makes me sad or I feel nothing at all.  It’s the nothing that bothers me more than the sadness.

I have spent the last couple months really trying to identify things that trigger it.  I am pretty sure I have discovered some of them.  I am not sure how to combat some of these as there is no way to not discuss some of them or avoid some of them.  In fact I am not sure if the way to deal with these triggers is to avoid them at all or actually discuss them.  It’s at times like these I miss The Rabyd Microphone, because I wouldn’t be hesitating about talking about things.  These days I have others to think about, so I play things close to the vest a little more and discuss them with my wife and our marriage counselor more.

My Depression Triggers:

  1. Anger – After I calm down it turns to The Grey.  The real problem is after this summer I have much more to get angry about, so it comes up more often.
  2. Talking about certain people – I lost a lot of friends but to be honest when you make a serious mistake and friends abandon you, then you at least find out who your real friends were.  The one’s that just left or took off, yeah, fuck ’em. Less baggage now. That’s not the issue.  It’s the people who didn’t just abandon you, they stabbed you as they left.  They took advantage of your vulnerability or openness to them and they left you when you needed them most or even worse betrayed you.  Yeah, those people make me angry or sad and then The Grey follows.
  3. When I don’t feel a love connection.  I know it sounds stupid or maybe sappy but love connections fight my depression. They have to be maintained so my wife and I cuddle and talk a lot whenever possible. I make a point of it; to keep it going so when The Grey comes it helps me get over it quicker.  It could be said though that if I haven’t maintained my love connections, The Grey comes more often when I am alone.  I am alone a lot as an introvert,  People drain my energy over time and I need a recharge by getting alone. But there is a great deal of difference in being alone and feeling lonely.

The past is a relentless bastard even though it cannot be changed.  It still takes a toll on you if you let it.  I have found the only real way to combat it is look to the future to be better. To keep walking.  Hopefully from time to time you stand in the sunlight.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – Budget Plan

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Budgeting is not something new to me.  I have handled things before like this, mostly though I find budgeting tedious and boring, so I find ways to do it that are quicker.  Thankfully computer software these days makes things go much better.  Mostly though the plan for budget is pretty simply from my perspective.

When I was a Christian, I followed Dave Ramsey a lot.  The fact is his basic plan makes a lot of sense simply because it follows tried and true things. I don’t see that I have to change my respect for its wisdom.  We are in debt again and we do need to make more money to combat that but we also need a plan to get back to financial health again. Our plan follows the Dave Ramsey pattern.

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

There is a missing step as I have children but they are all grown up and I pretty much told them what my family told me – ‘you want college education, pay for it yourself.’  Step 5 for us wold be more of buy a small home and pay it off quickly because right now we rent an apartment and probably will continue to rent until we get to a point of being debt free.

After twenty years of being in the ministry I have little to show for it.  I don’t own a home.  I have a lot of debt and some things have had to be cut.  Probably the most devastating right now is health insurance.  We can’t afford it with the payments we have to make on other things and that means both my diabetes and my wife issues will have to be handled out of pocket and nope – we don’t have the money for that either.  Hopefully nothing major happens.

If we have any further need its to start making more money and that is why I accelerated school to be pretty much done except the internship, so I can start marketing my degree for a better job. I would stay where I am but they would need to make me more than a grunt worker at this point and they would also have to make me full-time instead of 32 hours a week. At this point in my life it is about retirement and that means I am about 20 years behind people my same age because of being a pastor all that time in my first career. Yep, it’s a tall order but I don’t just want to survive but thrive.

As an aside if you are thinking of ministry as a career, I recommend going to a secular school for your bachelor’s and get it in something you can make money doing.  Do that for twenty years and get your financial life in order and then go get you Masters in Divinity and be a pastor. Trust me on this, you will thank me for it.

Right now we could be classified as working poor.  Not poor enough to qualify for government handouts, but not rich enough to get ahead.  That needs to change soon and for me that means a better job with more money so we can breathe again.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Achieving greater purposes is a line in the virtue I have been thinking about a lot lately.  When I look at things in my financial future I think others are going to play a role.  What I want is my own business to take into retirement.  I want it to be my retirement.  Not having something to do, I think is the death of a lot of people.  The one’s who live the longest understand discipline and sticking with something.

At this point I have all the plans in place, bucket list, goals and routines.  Now its time to take all these pieces and step back and reform the bigger picture.  I think though I will do a separate post on this under The Rabyd Skald platform probably this afternoon.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Not much to say here other than I keep going and I keep getting up. Right now school needs to have more attention and so I am making my plans to put more effort in and finish.  I may limp over the line but I will finish.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

I am a deist, humanist and somewhat of a pagan and so I am loyal to those philosophies. I am truly working on being loyal to myself, my wife and my family.  The Self and marriage is a tougher one to keep in balance because to have a marriage often involves sacrificing what you want at times.  I just don’t want to give up too much loyalty to myself.  I still want what I want and for my sake, I can’t give it all up.  At the same time I want this marriage to work and be better than ever.  I am loyal to my friends, they need only ask and I will do what I can.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – My Nutritional Plan

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin) Day 

I never really got anywhere with my body and health until I figured out that it wasn’t the exercise that mattered most.  Exercise is important but what is more important is nutrition.  If you can get nutrition down, then a lack of exercise at times when it happens is less detrimental.  My experience so far with this is that when I can’t lift or walk like I would like, my weight and health stay steady as long as I am keeping up nutrition.

Now, I have to say that the diet plans with you counting carbs or calories don’t work for me.  Nor does setting up a meal plan in the sense of having every meal and snack laid out.  No, none of that works for me and I also find the whole idea of six small meals a day cost prohibitive.  Sorry it is. So I have spent my time looking for alternatives.

My goals with nutrition is 1) To lose fat, 2) To maintain muscle and strength and 3) control my diabetes. These three goals do often conflict, at least if you follow the traditional method for dealing with diabetes for instance.  The original diet plan I had from the experts still had me pouring carbs into myself in order to keep my sugar steady.  The problem with this became all to apparent that I struggled to lose weight and logically, if you are insulin resistant, how in the world is it better to put more things into your blood stream that require more insulin to digest? How is that going to work?  You are compounding the problem. People assured me this worked but then I watched this video and realized I actually has doctors asking the same questions and bingo it clicked.

I also have some practical concerns.

Firstly, I need a plan that I can eat when I can eat and not worry about how much I am eating.  For me a better control system is controlling what and when I eat.  Not how much and counting numbers.  Secondly, I can’t always eat at regular intervals.  I neither have the money to buy the food nor the schedule. Finally,  I also am one of those people who like a big meal now and then.  So my plan in since the beginning of summer has been two-fold.  1) Paleo Diet as a base and 2) Intermittent fasting as a control.

Paleo Diet is my base in that it controls what I eat.  Not how much but basically what I can eat.  Mostly I eliminate a lot of stuff that has sugar or carbs altogether. Probably the most notable are bread, pasta, potatoes, sugar and dairy.  Now I am not pure Paleo Diet.  I ignore two things – Dairy (it doesn’t have carbs – unless sugar is added – and it contains protein) and High Salt Meats. Basically the last one is countered by the fact I lift and muscles need salt.

Bread is a struggle because all cheap meals are sandwich foundational.  I don’t miss pasta much.  I hit potatoes maybe once a week. Sugar I still have once in a while but I buy the smallest serving of what I am craving and stick with that.  Fruit is a good alternative to sugar snack.  I like oranges and strawberries as an alternative and the nice thing about them is I only need one orange and a handful of strawberries.  The main thing is I can eat all the meat I want to and it doesn’t matter what kind.  Protein in abundance and that stifles appetite.

The control is intermittent fasting.  The nutritional and agricultural industry have us with this notion that we must eat three large meals a day with numerous snacks in between.  I mean what incentive do they really have to tell us to eat less?  They make money off us eating stuff.  So I intermittent fast from time to time.  I am getting ready to do some more here starting next week once all the planning is in place and it is time to implement it all.

Now so far this summer I think the results speak for themselves. I weighed 343 lbs in mid May.  My A1C was 8.1.  In late July I was 302 lbs. and my A1C was 7.0  I have lost weight since but I don’t know how much.  I also suspect my sugar as dropped some more but until my next blood test I don’t know how much.  I would say it’s working far better than the established nutritional plans.

Despite the success, I feel I have plateaued as far as weight loss in the last month or so.  So more carb reduction is in order and probably intermittent fasting will return.  In that case I am thinking I will eat breakfast which will be purely Paleo with one exception.  Probably oatmeal with honey.  Then I will fast from the time I get up which is 2 am roughly because of work and that will last until I get off work which is about 2 pm,  I can eat then from 1 pm until I go to bed a 8 pm.  Giving I am eating breakfast early when I get up this doesn’t seem as long.  On days off it is harder than I am at work honestly.

As far as drink I am heading toward being mostly water and not flavored either. If there is an exception, it’s my allowed consumption of alcohol at social events and a couple of times a week before bed.  Milk is not off my list because I still allow dairy but to be honest I am not a fan of milk.  I allow for Coke Zero, but I am thinking of limiting that way down for a while to get rid of the caffeine and save some money.  I think I might be a little high on that.

A word on cheats.  I do allow them.  I will eat at work if my employer is putting up the food and it doesn’t matter what it is. I allow three meals a week to have non-Paleo elements.  As long as it is only one.  Once a week, my wife and I consider ice cream together, so that is on my list of cheats.  Mostly though when I have a craving, I get the smallest serving size and eat it, or commonly I just don’t and wait and usually, given enough time, it goes away.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

I think we are good so far.  When all the planning is done and I get these journal entries in line with the goals, bucket lists, routines and plans, the Business Virtues will probably focus on the budget instead of nutrition. For now I can say the budget is tight but we are providing for ourselves what we need. The future is still the question and this going to require a budget that anticipates growth and we are going to have to make that happen.  For self-reliance to continue we need income growth.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

I think the real indicator that you are on to something when it regards work is people begin to complain about it.  I work hard, I can do a lot of things people who are smaller and weaker cannot do and my job does have that heavy lifting element. I am not the fastest worker but I work constantly and continually, you won’t see me standing around and talking a lot unless it is communicating with management or my fellow workers.  I am thus starting to get attacks against my work by people who don’t.  Complaining never has done me much good so I am working on making sure I complain about systems and things, not people.

Laziness is not efficient either. I have to admit I have used being tired as an excuse away from work when it comes to school.  I need to get over that. I need extra item in November to do research and write so the busy work of school needs to be a week or two ahead for me to be successful and that need to happen by this weekend or latest Halloween.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

I don’t have time to be hospitable to any but the most in need. My life needs to become more prosperous before my dream of retiring to be the philosopher everyone visits comes true.  More on that in a future post.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens – ‘Nudism’

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

As a Christian theologian I wrote on the subject of human nudity a lot.  You can still read most of it at All Things Rabyd under the page titled God and Nudity.  Through all that, I developed some interesting friends in the nudist community.  I discovered that the term ‘Christian nudist’ is not actually an oxymoron.  I see recently the Sky Clad Therapist among my recent followers.  He is someone I have had a long association with on WordPress through the years on this subject.

Back in the Christian days, I spent a lot of time a Biblical scholar and theologian trying to come to grips with nudity from a Christian perspective. I went through the entire Bible and came to some controversial conclusions.  Some of the more thought provoking ones were that God’s view of nudity is that it was good, that the Bible makes no distinction about women’s breasts as being sinful and that if we were to follow the gospel’s implications to their logical conclusions, then we should return to our original state if all sin has been removed by Christ – ‘naked and unashamed’.

Practically of course, one cannot act on such conclusions either as a Christian in Western society or particularly as a minister.  Now that I am neither, I face some thoughts on this matter because the only thing really now is the social mores of our culture and the decency laws.  I say this because personally I have been just as comfortable in my skin as I am in my clothes and have been that way most of my life. The question now is does my departure from Christianity change my perspective on nudism?  On to the Wolves and Ravens.

Geri (Need): Do we have a need to be naked?  I think we do.  Practically I know for a biological fact our skin functions in its job better when exposed to the open air.  From vitamin D production to simply not developing the fungus on our bodies that comes from sweat and oil being trapped next to our skin by our clothing, I would say there is good evidence being naked for some frames of time leads to better health.  Psychologically, I have to say there is something relaxing about it.  I know what others have told me social nudity has allowed them to have a better positive body image, better understanding of the equality of human beings and other benefits. So perhaps our minds, hearts and bodies do have a need for it.

Freki (Want):  Do people want to be naked? Honestly there are surely those that do.  The question is what of the rest of people who have social mores about it and don’t ‘want to see that.’  The point is though there are some of us who like to be sky-clad from time to time and I don’t think this can be labeled as inherently bad depending on the motivation.  From and intimacy standpoint, nudity with lovers is desired and I can’t say that is inherently bad either.  The issue is motivation and what the nudity is being used for.  But even the uses of nude photography and art have their want aspects that requires looking at motivation. To want to be naked in and of itself – no problem.  If there is a purpose attached then the moral question shifts to whether the want is beneficial or detrimental to self or society.

Huginn (Reason): If I apply straight reason to nudism and nakedness, I really can’t say there is any reasonable detriment to either self or society.  You can’t make a positive statement that a person’s nudity causes harm in and of itself. If a woman strips her clothes off in a crowded room, no one can claim that action or her nudity harms anything other than their sensibilities.  The only reason to be applied to such action is that because some do not have such a view, it might bring harm to her because some would be offended at take action against her – physical or societal.  Reason should tell the nudist, to be wary of the laws of the land and what society thinks to avoid consequences. But no reasonable inquiry can find that nudity in and of itself harms anyone.

Muninn (Wisdom): Wisdom says that there are certain societal issues that, while it is not reasonable to have moral objections to them, people do not act on reason. Probably some of the most noteworthy of such issues are marriage and sex.  Certainly in this category is nudism.  Nudity generates a varied response.  Those that want to fulfill their need and desire to be nudists need to exercise a lot of caution and wisdom.  Privacy and finding private places is a good start with this. If there is a need for social nudity, finding places dedicated to such activity is probably a better bet than fighting laws.

I am not saying to not educate and try to find a way to more rational laws.  I think for instance the topfree movement is a good movement.  What I am saying is you better ask yourself if your activism is worth the money in fines or time in jail. There is also the question of family to consider.  As much as individual practice is at the forefront, your spouse may not be of the same mind or the rest of your family.  Nudists simply have to accept the fact that not everyone can separate nudity from sexuality.

Conclusion:  Personally, I am not an open practitioner of nudism. It is part of my life but I do so privately, when no one else is around. It is part of my morning routine from the time I get up; through meditation, stretching, breakfast and my shower. I sleep naked and have for decades.  I don’t really have any rational objection to it anymore, nor do I appeal to any authority other than reason and wisdom.  I keep my practice private and to myself. I find it liberating, comforting and spiritually uplifting as a spiritual discipline.

I think that is probably the way most nudism is practiced in western society.  People being comfortable in the privacy of their own homes.  To be honest, we should respect that and it’s none of our concern most of the time.  For the nudist, I would say that it’s OK to be one, but listen to the ravens.  Use your reason and wisdom as you exercise your needs and wants.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – Weightlifting Plan

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day

I must pause here and reflect a bit before I get into my actual plan.  This has been without a doubt one of the most stressful times I have had running from the end of May until the end of August.  It was in many ways up and down like the worlds most twisty roller coaster and just as friendly to my insides.  Through all that, I have been able to maintain a couple of things that kept me from going totally nuts.  One of them was weightlifting.

Like Henry Rollins says – 200 lbs. is 200 lbs.  The Iron is a reference point, beacon and the real deal.  There is no falsity to iron. In my life, the iron has never left me, disappointed me, run out on me or freaked out on me. I found this summer the one place of calm and steadiness was the gym and my truest friend the iron.

My weightlifting plan revolves around quarters.  October through December is the fourth quarter so I am coming to the end of my current year cycle. Next Year is kind of up in the air because I plan on looking for a new job and that might take me in various directions.  It’s too bad because after three and a half years at my current gym, I have come to love the place.  Practicality might dictate something closer to work instead of school and that means changing gyms.  This might cause me to change plans but I doubt it as I wouldn’t consider a gym that didn’t have the equipment I need, unless I have no choice.

In planning I have also had to consider some injuries of the past.  Two years ago I had a repair on a high hernia which required a fairly lengthy recovery from a lifting standpoint.  More recently I have had to deal with tennis elbow in my left elbow. It’s these more lengthy, non-life threatening events that have caused me to rethink an old saying – ‘you need to train to train.”  That means more abdominal work and forearm work.  Stuff a lot of people neglect but I can’t afford to do that anymore.  I want to keep lifting for a long time so injury prevention training is part of the deal.  That’s why the split is longer with five days but I only lift on four days a week so recovery is not an issue.  It’s also why every day now starts with a full stretching routine in the mix.

Everything I do is focused on muscle growth or endurance.  Strength comes with that but it’s not a focus. As I age, muscle loss is more of a problem and I want to fight that.  I will however start with strength because my bucket list has some items I need to work on. So January will be more strength focused with probably a 4 x 5 set/rep range. April to June I will be back to hypertrophy with 4 x 8, July to September 4 x 10, October to December – 4 x 8 once again.

My split hasn’t changed all year other than I added a day – The Core Day which is about abdominal work.  Day 1 – Chest/Delts, Day 2 – Back/Traps, Day 3 – Legs, Day 4 – Arms, Day 5 – The Core. I am hoping once school gets done I can go back to five days a week but right now I four is enough with one day getting a break each week.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – Be positive about my future

There is always some argument about whether honor is an internal thing or external thing.  I say internal because quite frankly not every one is going to like you and just because some people dishonor you, it doesn’t mean you have it give them credence.  What should mean something to you is your feeling of self value and if that’s good you are good. It’s why some people can disrespect me and I can ignore them or tell them to fuck off.

I am struggling with being positive.  Right now mental fatigue is very high and what I really want is a whole week off from everything.  Not going to happen, so need to find a way to get more motivation to get stuff done and that starts with being positive.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

I say fuck off to a lot of people who call me a coward.  Sometimes the right thing is to walk away and that is what I am trying to do.  The same time, I feel the scales of justice need to be balanced, but I can be patient about that.

Image may contain: 1 person, beard and text  Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times.

I spend a lot of time in silence these days.  It’s better than lying to people who want to know how I am.  Mostly, people need to mind their own business.  I also would say I don’t tell to many people what’s going on with me, because my trust level of others has taken a nose dive in the last few months.  I trust very few these days and most of them are family and even then advice is to be wary of everyone.  Some don’t like the truth, so there is that.

Image may contain: one or more people and textSchool is OK.  I get by but I am waiting for that spark that ignites me to pursue knowledge at a high level and I think that is starting to happen.  We shall see.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Grey Wayfarer (Fantasy Serial) – Chapter 2 – Frigg’s Vision (Frigg)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Saturn’s Day

Frigg stood on the porch of her and her husband’s cabin.  It wasn’t much, just a few rooms and a central chamber with fireplace.  Not that the cold mattered to her or her husband as being immortal, cold was simply a hardship to be endured.  The other two rooms were a large bedroom for her and Odin and another bedroom for guests.

She stood puzzled at her thoughts and feelings that morning, a stern look on her milky white face.  She brushed back her long golden hair as the small but steady breeze kept pushing it in her face.  He ice blue eyes scanning the edge of the woods waiting for her husband’s arrival.  She knew he would be bringing someone with him.  Someone who was going to  change everything. She after all was a practitioner of seidr, the magic of fate.  She didn’t use often anymore.  Knowing the future of a person and their fate was, as she discovered, an awful burden to bear.

She used both hands to brush down her dress which was white and made of a slightly see through fabric. She wove it herself. Her body was perfectly curved and her proportions would have made any artist long for the chance to paint her.  The dress she wore shimmered and on occasion one could see her skin underneath.  Perhaps her sister goddess Freya would smile at her lack of modesty in her choice of dress. Freya being the goddess of sex and love was rarely modest about either subject in both action and words.  Frigg was the mother goddess and so hearth, home and marriage were her domains.  A wife should be modest but she was with her husband alone so modestly was less important.

Frigg however was unconcerned about the opinions of another goddess.  Right now her concern was on a vision she had of her husband finding a body on the beach.  She could see the body of a man whose fate was one to bring change to the gods.  Great Change. She could not as usual see all the details. Only that the man over her husbands shoulders was fated to bring change. What and to what extent she could not say.

In a few moments, two ravens appeared and flew to her.  One landed on her forearm.  Huginn.  He whispered to her and she smiled and nodded.  Huginn flew off and joined his brother Muninn.  In a few more moments, she saw her husband and the wolves round the bend of the beach and start approaching the house.  Odin walked with confidence and assurance of the king of the gods.  Her heart always swelled with pride when she saw her husband.

She frowned when she turned her attention to the naked man he was carrying.  Odin’s wolves ran ahead and greeted Frigg and she greeted them back.  Odin’s stride closed the distance between them.

“Frigg, I have a man who needs your attention.”

“I know, but relax his fate is not to die.  Rest your mind, hansom husband.  Take him inside to the guest room.”

Odin sniffed a short snort and carried the man inside. His wolves followed him in and the ravens flew through the open doorway.  The ravens found their place on the fireplace mantel and the wolves lay by the fire in front of two chairs that faced it.

Odin and Frigg then placed the man under the blankets in the guest bed.  Frigg smiled at the man.  Older but still fit and….well equipped.  Freya her sister would laugh to know her thoughts.  Odin smiled at his wife and Frigg actually blushed.

“Looks like I am going to have to get my wife to forget something she saw tonight.”

“Fear not husband, I was only smiling at what Freya would think of our stranger. But still it has been a few days since we…”

Odin laughed and slapped his wife’s backside to which she blushed again and grinned at him.

“Tell me wife, is he the one?”

“Yes, he is fated to bring great change to the gods.”

“Ragnarok?”

“His thread of life ends at the same time your’s does, my love.”

Odin’s smile faded.  His vision of his end was the eyes and teeth of Fenrir the great wolf.

“My love, that does not mean he will cause Ragnarok, just that he will be there at the end of the world. I caution you my love, remember we can think we are stopping fate by our actions but in truth we are actually making it sure.”

“I know, Fenrir taught me that.”

She nodded.

“What’s wrong with him, my wife?”

“Nothing, there is magic at work here my husband.  I need to open my seeing eye.”

Frigg’s face went blank.  Odin waited knowing that she would see a vision of some sort. He hated this part of it though.  There was always some fear in his heart that the love of his life would stay in that glazed over state forever.  But once again she returned.

She turned to Odin.

“It’s him.  The Grey thread, the Grey Wayfarer.  That amulet has allowed him to cross the barrier into our world from his.”

Odin grunted.  Damn.  So change and perhaps Ragnarok after all.

“Well, there is nothing for it my wife but to set him on the path he must walk.”

Frigg frowned, “I know but…”

“Sorry, my wife.  I believe at long last our end has come.  As you said to fight fate might bring it about and hasten it.”

“Should we tell him when he awakens, my king?”

Odin was taken back.  Frigg never called him ‘my king’ anywhere except in court at Valhalla.

“Nothing my queen.  It would only bring on the risk of hastening fate as well  No, we tell him nothing, equip him and then set him on the path.  He must walk it himself and that will bring about the end quick enough.”

Frigg rose to her feet and then walked to her husband and put her arms around his neck.  She kissed him deeply and his arms when around her.  He pulled her close, and when their kiss broke, she whispered in his ear.

“Take me, my love.  Make love to me like it is the end of the world.”

“I shall my love, because it is.”

Odin scooped her up in his arms and carried her out of the room and into their bedroom.  There they made love as only gods who are finally facing mortality can.  After her husband fell asleep, Frigg lay there naked in the darkness for a while but couldn’t sleep.  She left the bed and wandered to the guest room where she looked at the man again.

Tears filled her eyes.  She didn’t know who to weep for more.  The gods who were about to face mortality or the man laying in the bed in front of her.  His fate would end with theirs, but the pain he would suffer would be more than most gods could endure.  Yes, the gods had good reason for sorrow.  But the Grey Wayfarer… may the gods have pity for him.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – Bucket List

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

The Routines are finished and I have my principles and goals written down.  This leaves my Bucket List, Weightlifting Plan, Diet and Budgeting plan.  The three plans I will deal with next week, but today is the Bucket List.

For me a bucket list is a list of important side quests. It’s what I am doing to enjoy life.  I have done one before and there were some raised eyebrows about some of them.  The issue for me is not to be the straight arrow I was before as pastor.  I don’t wear a white hat nor do I wear a black one. I just want to live my life and wear a grey hat while doing it.  The Bucket List is the best reflection of this.  It’s not about goals so much as enjoying life as much as possible.

Bucket List

  1. Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.  Perhaps as part of one of those River Cruises that go up and down the Danube River. I loved that city but I just didn’t have the time to explore it fully.
  2. Get My Tattoos.  I actually have four planned for myself at this point and a joint tattoo which my wife agreed to get with me. 1) Valknut Based Tattoo on my right hand or forearm.  2) Double Ravens on my right shoulder 3) Double wolves on my left shoulder.  4) Broken Celtic Cross in the center of my back. 5) Joint tattoo with my wife.  She has agreed to something small but in a noticeable place.
  3. Actually get drunk – I am a big dude and do drink but I have never gotten drunk as far as I can tell.  I just don’t know what my limit actually is because I have never arrived there.
  4. Smoke a Joint – this is conditional on my state legalizing MJ in November but I do want to try it once.
  5. Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.  This needs to be my first true hiking experience.
  6. Write My Novel – Needs to be done.  Not just the National Novel Writing Novel that I did finish but a true novel 90-120 thousand words and submitted for publication.
  7. Learn Latin – I actually have Wheellock on my shelf.  The book the workbook and the reader.  I just need to discipline myself to do it.
  8. Learn Hungarian – I would like to go to Budapest and speak the language if possible. Yeah that’s two languages.
  9. Weightlifting – Bench 225 lbs, Squat 315 lbs, and Deadlift 405 lbs. This is really three in one but hey it works. By the way this is for reps in my current routine.  So last set at least four reps for each on a 4 x 8 which is the minimum reps on the last set without me dropping back.
  10. Start my own business – This is the eventual goal  under my business virtues.  I would like a bar with an attached BBQ place. Another option is a bar, coffee shop, bookstore combo.

The rules of course are once one thing is completely done, to cross it off and add something new if I fall below eight things. I plan on dying with a bucket list in hand still with things on it.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

The Routines are all in place and now the great challenge is to get things done every day.  Planning phase over basically, now it’s time to make it happen.  The real discipline issue now is school work.  It usually isn’t a problem when I find the personal motivation but this is my last semester and I have a large case of last semester drop off. It is something I fight everyday.

One other thing that dogs me is thinking on the past.  It can really steal my time and I need to be more proactive on stopping that from happening.  It’s hard because I have guilt plus a lot of wounds inflicted to deal with.  Not everything has scared over and some sometimes I still bleed a little.  But I keep going, I just need to find a way past it all and get on with things. Certain thoughts and dreams make that hard is all.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

A thought struck me when I was meditating on this virtue the other day.  It’s not just that you keep getting up, but it’s also how you get up that matters.  Sometimes when you get back up it’s not time to take another hit but heal.  Strategic withdrawal is sometimes necessary.  You can always exercise courage another day.  In large part that is what me and my wife have been doing.  With drawing after our marriage got knocked down and trying to heal it before we go on. It’s working so far.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

My loyalty to my wife is high.  I mean what other level should I have given that after cheating on her and telling her that I didn’t love her anymore but the highest; when despite all that she continued to love me and forgave me?  She demonstrated fidelity to me even though I wasn’t being loyal to her.  I don’t get it but she is something special and she is loved and respected by me.

My family, my few friends know I will be there for them. I have been at my current job long enough to develop loyalty to my team that works together.  It’s nice to have coworkers again.  I don’t really have a faith to be loyal to yet. I also am more dedicated to the principles of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness than I am the current crop of leaders that have played games with those rights all my life. Ultimately, I am loyal to my code and my philosophy.  That’s enough for me right now.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – Weekly Routine

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin) Day

Morning and Daily Routines established, I want to turn to the subject of Weekly Routine.  There are some things that do not come up every day but they need to be disciplined and focused like everything else.  These things need to happen in order to achieve my goals.

Weekly Routine:

  1. Weightlifting – 4 days per week.  I actually have a five-day split but one day gets a break each week and then it gets rotated back in.  I love lifting but I can’t do it every day because I love the results more and that requires rest days.
  2. Cleaning – There are some cleaning actions I do try to do every day as habit.  Making the bed for instance and wiping down counters in the kitchen. The thing is I also try to do the full apartment at least every third day but the target is actually every other day.
  3. Walking – Right now I am using the walk from my car to class which is rather lengthy and happens four days a week for this.  That said, once school ends I will need a more disciplined approach.

If you haven’t noticed the list of these Routines get shorter.  This is probably a good thing and a little by design.  Like I said the best place for things to be is in the morning routine if possible.  In the Daily Routine next and then Weekly.  That said things like this just really can’t be pushed into Daily or Morning stuff.

This leaves the lifestyle stuff that happens every day or week but really isn’t a routine or requires an overall strategy to implement.  Weightlifting on this list is one of them.  The other two are Diet and Budget.  Before that there is one more list to make – my Bucket List.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

I think presently my wife and I are fairly self-reliant as long as we keep our budget tight.  The issue is staying that way and that is more of a long-term thing which requires us to thinking growing prosperity rather than just stable prosperity.  Prices increase and the cost of living will always be getting greater, this requires growing income and that is not just to live a better lifestyle but also to maintain self-reliance.  Stagnation doesn’t just kill prosperity; it kills self-reliance in the end.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

The interest of being more efficient is always in front of me.  Being able to do the same work or more work with less cost and in less time is always something I think about.  The issue is to squeeze what I make into more and more.  I enjoy work when I am there.   It is a great time for the most part because I get to be doing something where I am making money and doing work.  At the same time I know I need to either do more or something else if I am going to reach my goals.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

I still can do more than a Coke and a Smile these days.  If you really need it I can do that and a meal and perhaps still give you advice.  That last part is not guaranteed to work but it’s free so you get what you pay for. I am also still toying with the idea of making my living room small group friendly for some sort of support group.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Of Wolves and Ravens” – How This Works

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

 

Happy Tyr’s Day

In my introduction last week I probably rushed it a little in one factor of how this “Of Wolves and Ravens” actually works as far as a philosophy.  My main thing will be to take an issue (either political, economic, social or even personal) and working it through the philosophy summed up in the statement – “It’s OK to Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens First”.

My point is doing this is to basically create an exercise to engaging this new philosophy for myself.  Hopefully in working through this philosophy, I can provide some insight that you the reader might find beneficial as well.  Today I want to basically expand this philosophy a little with some examples so you the reader can understand what I am talking about in general.  Next week I will pick our first issue.  Each issue will be boiled down to the what we need and want but then engaging some reason and wisdom what is the best course of action.  I am going to use the general topic of Sex as an example.

Needs (Geri): When looking at the need side of things we have to ask ourselves what is needed here?  In the case of Sex, people as a race need to continue.  The real need of sex is procreation.  It might be argued that the entertainment value of sex is also a need but the issue of a need from a human point of view is about survival. Sex allows the human race to survive and go on.  Sex needs to take place for this to happen. If we look at organisms and their needs water, food and procreation top the list for all living things and for humans one of these is procreation and sex is what we do to make that happen. No one, but the most extreme view would argue that the wolf of need for procreation needs to be fed.

Wants (Freki): We humans though like sex and want it.  While some people want it for the procreative action as people do want to have children, the main thing about want and sex is that we enjoy the pleasure of it.  Sex in and of itself is not evil or bad, so us wanting it is not wanting something bad either.  The pleasure of sex is something good, we could conclude as it makes people feel better about life. It is OK to feed Freki when it comes to sex as it fills a desire and there is nothing inherently wrong with fulfilling a desire. It’s OK to feed the Wolves.  It’s OK to have sex because it is enjoyable and it leads to the continuation of the human race.

Reason (Huginn): The real problem though is we must first listen to the Ravens before we make that choice. The one thing we need to think about is what are the consequences of sexual activity?  Well this probably where I would note that ‘Sex’ as a topic might be a little broad but let’s continue.  Mostly the issue here is unwanted pregnancy but that goes back to wants and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).  The question of unwanted pregnancies is a large issue and involves other issues such as abortion, religion and economics but this can be curbed quite a bit in the modern world if people use effective birth control.  STDs are largely controlled by certain birth control methods but let’s be fair here – there is one benefit of sexual fidelity either abstinence or faithfulness to a single partner – the risk of STDs is near null.  Reason says that effective birth control coupled by basic fidelity and caution might kick the two major concerns about sex out of the picture. at least for the most part.

Wisdom (Muninn): On a wisdom side of things, we deal with relationships.  In western society it is a rare man or woman who doesn’t have a problem with jealousy.  Rape is also an issue here because the issue of mutual consent is a Wisdom issue. Sex is not something you take from others, nor can we avoid the fact that human nature causes both men and women to eventually look for an exclusive sexual relationship.  Not all cultures are this way, so each one would have to be considered but in our society if you go sleeping around the other person is probably going to get upset and a breakup is probably in your future.  Some people can be open about this in their relationships, but they seem to be the exception rather than the rule.  There are a lot of issues I could continue to talk about here and I can definitely say that the subject of sex is too broad a topic to handle in one post, but I hope you get the idea.

Conclusion:

At this point I might wrap things up with a conclusion.  Mostly when it comes to the subject of sex, my advice would be to be safe, respectful and communicate so boundaries are understood. There is a lot more here but for example purposes, I hope it helps you understand what “Of Wolves and Ravens” is going to be about.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – Daily Routine

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Geri, Freki, Hugin, Munin... Valknut

Happy Moon’s Day

With my Morning Routine set up, the discussion turns to my Daily Routine.  What is the stuff I do every day?  Well, probably what I would like to see every day at this point.

Daily Routine:

  1. Blogging – the general target is to have three posts cued up in the scheduled list by day’s end and four others in the draft file in various stages of construction.
  2. Reading – 1 hour per day.  Right now this is taken up by school, but eventually I would like this to be free to read what I want.
  3. Study / Homework – 1 hour per day or until all necessary work is completed. This is currently on my list because of school.  I think it might stay after school is over because I will be using it for research or for writing things for publication.
  4. Empty In Box – I have a box on my desk that I put stuff in that requires my attention.  The goal is to have it empty at the end of every day.
  5. Financial Transaction input – I try to put all financial transactions for me and my wife in my computer each day.  It doesn’t take long.
  6. Communication / Cuddle Time – I try to do this with my wife every day for at least a half hour. Sometimes our varied schedules make this difficult.  It is actually the number one thing on this list and gets done when there is time.

None of this stuff actually takes very long other than the time limit stuff.  My goal is to have it done each day, so every day I am finished with things and making progress.  That the administration of life is kept up with every single day is the major goal here.

Mostly this is only problematic on days where I have both work and class.  On those days free time is at a premium.  Otherwise I have time to do all of it.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – Be positive about my future

At work and school I guess I feel that inner sense of honor to a point.  People at both places value my contributions and that is good for my self-esteem in that sense.  Most of the challenges to honor come from my dreams and the occasional person I run into who used to greet me warmly but now shuns me.  The people who shun me are easy to deal with – 1) check them off as no longer a friend, and  2) move along treating them as someone I used to know.  Dreams are a bit harder. My recurring dream is me going about my daily business but with people who I used to know yelling at me.  They yell things at me indicating my moral failures and my short comings.  The dreams always end with them turning violent and me being the victim of a death-wound by one of them.  I usually wake up at that point.  If I dwell on this too much my honor level drops a bit.

I am starting to feel more positive about my future.  I applied for graduation this last week so that is in the works. I am feeling better about school in general although I do have some more work to do yet to catch up.  It’s close now to the end and I think I will be a better position for a better job after graduation.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

In my dreams the word ‘coward’ comes out of the mouths of some.  I don’t really get that accusation.  I simply have responded at times to what people have done to me by talking about it openly.  The coward would gossip, slander, back bite and back stab.  I don’t do those things.  I either tell people what happened from my perspective or I keep silent. I don’t feel I need to respond directly to people who in my estimation were the first ones to act in cowardice toward me.  Virtue is a two-way street and if the accusation of being a coward came from someone I consider brave, I would give it thought.  As it is, not so much.

I have an evaluation coming up at work.  I need to speak on the future with that company.  My additional problem is I need an internship. This is going to require some courage to explain to my present employer where I stand with them. If I am not going to have a good and productive future with them, then I need to move on when I can.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times.

Honesty with others is not so great an issue as honesty with myself. I am wrestling with so much these days as far as truth with me that I have a hard time with keeping my foundation stable. These days I prefer silence and peace. If only those voices from my dreams would stop haunting me when I am awake.

I am getting ready to write my last major paper for school – My Political Science Capstone.   I am wrestling with the topic and the thesis statement.  I have permission to use this for my Health Economics Class as well.  I want this paper to reflect what I see as the truth about a health issue.  It has to have sound political science basis, economics and if I can get my international business knowledge into it as well – bonus.  It’s not just about a paper but a final reflection on what I have learned in this degree and applying it to real life. It’s about pursuing truth as well.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!