Month: October 2018

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – Selfishness is Good for Everyone

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

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“You’re being selfish” is an expression people might hear often when they are trying to do something for themselves.  When I look at the virtues of Discipline, Perseverance and Fidelity though its selfishness with a purpose.  All the virtues have an individual independence flavor to them but these three seem to be more inward focused with outward fruit if you understand me.  The Foundational Virtues are about all things.  The Business Virtues are outward focused with inward benefit but Self Virtues are inward focused with outward benefit.

Being focused on yourself is not necessarily selfish but if even if it is, as Ayn Rand points out in her book The Virtue of Selfishness, being selfish has a lot more benefits to others than you first realize. Those who accuse people of being selfish are often selfish themselves trying to get someone else to do something for them that benefits them.  A person who is self-reliant and focused on self does do one thing for everyone else – he is not a burden to them and their efforts.  By being self-focused, you at least don’t drag others down by being a leach on their prosperity or stealing people’s’ time, efforts or money.  There is a right kind of selfishness and it involves the Nine Noble Virtues and in particular Discipline, Perseverance and Fidelity.

These are Self Virtues in my mind because there is only one person who can engage them fully – self (aka me).  I am the only one who can be disciplined.  I am the only one who can get back up after every failure.  I am the one who must be faithful.  All these virtues depend on my decisions but the ones that have the most effect by realizing this is these three.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Discipline dots my life personally a lot.  I have my morning routine – get up, stretch, breakfast, pills and supplements, shower, shave, get dressed. I have my daily stuff – write a post, study, read, relax.  I have my marriage stuff – talk and cuddle for at least a half hour a day. Some discipline in my life isn’t every day – I go to work when I am scheduled, I go to class, I hit the gym to lift four days a week,  My diet is a discipline that hits me several times a day.  The point is discipline for me is pretty high and all of it is where I push myself a little further than the time before.  Without this continual being hard on myself and making myself do the right things, I become less.  With it I become more.

If I have a goal here it is to find all aspects of life where I can be disciplined, I do it.  If I ever get into a position of leadership again, discipline for whoever I am leading will be a center piece of my leadership.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

I do this pretty naturally but there are times I want to quit. Everyone has their limits but; in the end, you have to stand back up and keep moving forward.  It’s not how hard you can hit life, it how hard of a hit you can take from life, get back up and keep moving forward.  I am paraphrasing Rocky Balboa, but he is right.

Goal – Keep getting up after every failure or defeat.  It is that easy to say.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Fidelity is a struggle for me.  But not where most people think.  My marriage – yes.  I am working on that.  Family – no, not so much as I am loyal to all my kids, grand kids and my mother.  Faith – that’s a deeper question of who I should be loyal to.  The virtue says I should stay loyal to them, which I agree, I just want to make sure I am loyal to something that is actually there.  Friends – Yep, the one’s I still have left absolutely.  My country – yeah, the country of The Constitution of the United States – yep.  The bastard nation that people in power have created these days – nope.

No, those are not the real struggle: the real problem is staying loyal to myself and what I need and want for myself.  It’s hard with all these other things pulling at you, but it if you don’t handle the stuff you want and need, and guide that by reason and wisdom you are going to burn yourself out to the point you won’t be able to be loyal to others.  I can speak from experience on this one.

You really choose what you are loyal to in the end,  But once you choose, you stick with it unless the other side shows itself disloyal.

Goal – Place my fidelity in things I trust because they have shown to be loyal to me. Yep, I believe fidelity is a response as well as an action.

Summary: 

I plan on part of my life being the good kind of selfish. I plan on disciplining myself to be a better person.  I will keep getting up and I will be loyal to that I have chosen to be loyal to as long as it shows loyalty to me.

The last line actually is pretty true for all the virtues.  I mean there is great discussion about whether one needs to be truthful with someone who has shown themselves to be deceptive.  I don’t think so.  I also don’t think I should have to show hospitality to those who have not shown me hospitality in return. Virtues are only truly valuable if they are freely given and received at the same time. Otherwise those who choose to live outside of virtue and live rather in the realm of dishonor do not have to be honored in return.

Goal List:

  1. Be positive about my future
  2. Act with courage at the right time
  3. Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times
  4. Work to be self-reliant by finishing school and building my career
  5. Work with enjoyment of work itself both in school and my job.
  6. Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.
  7. Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.
  8. Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.
  9. Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – The Outward Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

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The virtues of Self-Reliance, Industriousness and Hospitality tend to be more outward than inward in their focus.  That is not to say they don’t have an inward quality.  They are however virtues that focus on the business of living life and how in that business of living life we interact with others.  What ideals are were pursuing in our relationships with others and how we do the business of life with them.

The three virtues together create an attitude of hard work, independence but at the same time voluntary cooperation.  There is no coercion in the Business Virtues but a freedom to act as one sees fit to work, build a life for one self and help others if one wishes.  I have found this point to resonate with my libertarian philosophy much better than most other things.  It combines well with the idea of being free, independent and charitable by choice not by force.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

From the standpoint of others, self-reliance means you are not drawing off others or leaching off others to meet your basic needs and wants.  You are taking care of these things yourself and are reliant on only yourself to meet your own needs.  This means you are not a burden to others.  You are meeting your needs.

My goal has been pretty simple here.  To be meeting my own needs for food clothing and shelter.  My wife and I have achieved that but it needs to be maintained and kept going.  The goal is independence (financial and otherwise) both now and in the future.  The next phase is a better job to do that.  The practical steps being to finish my degree and market it or once school is finished find another source of income in addition to my current job.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

I don’t have a problem working hard.  I also believe in working hard at working smart.  Being a cleaver worker is as important as being a hard worker.  Striving for efficiency as someone who has studied economics is also something I enjoy.  Work as a joyous activity in and of itself takes a little more effort on my part, but I have recently discovered that attitude makes the day go even quicker than just staying busy.  From an outward standpoint, being an industrious person commands respect in the real world.  Laziness is never respected, nor does it lead one to prosperity.

My goal here is to work hard and with enjoyment; specifically in finishing my degree and working my current job.  This kind of hearkens back to the Foundational virtues as far as the nature of the goal, but industriousness is kind of like that.  Finding and enjoying work is the key to prosperity.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Being willing to share.  Not forced but willing.  This is actually a common virtue in many religions but as a Christian I must say I neglected it quite a bit.  Things have changed a bit since I last wrote on this.  Back then I could offer a Coke, a smile and a conversation.  Advice if asked for.  The issue is willingness to share in prosperity and I would say I have achieved a measure of that.  I can now offer to the truly desperate a shared meal if you wish, but make sure you are in need and after twenty years of dealing with freeloaders, I know the difference.

My goal here is to simply stand ready to help if I can and show hospitality if I can.  Nothing more or less.

Summary:

All said this is pretty simply to say.  Work hard to be self-sufficient, and enjoy what you do, work for greater prosperity and be ready to share willfully to those that need it.  All of this is voluntary as to force people to do any of this would violate all of these virtues.  You expect them not just in yourself but in others as well.

Goal List:

  1. Be positive about my future
  2. Act with courage at the right time
  3. Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times
  4. Work to be self-reliant by finishing school and building my career
  5. Work with enjoyment of work itself both in school and my job.
  6. Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

Until the Self Virtues,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – Starting with the Nine Noble Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

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My wife and I have been reading a book together as part of our own efforts to work on our relationship.  The book is Words Can Change Your Brain by Newberg and Andrew.  In it the authors make the observation that one of the questions we should be asking about and that is: “What is my greatest virtue?”  I found it interesting personally as I have been looking at the issues of what makes a virtue important without faith in a religion?  For me the Nine Noble Virtues of Asatru (NNV) have become my code and part of my philosophy of life. I meditate on them often and so what the book was teaching and what I as doing meshed quickly.  It also changed my thinking regarding goals and how to set them.

I have often set my goals based on what roles I wanted to achieve. I guess now see this a kind of chasing titles. I am not sure this is what I want for my life as often when a title is achieved ‘then what’? It becomes a constant struggle to redefine goals.  Not that I don’t want to achieve tangible results but it seems that virtue would drive a person far more than roles as they have to be worked on every day to either grow them or maintain them.  Once a goal is achieved with virtues as their guide, I can see how one then could set new goals far more quickly because the virtue would provide sight and insight into what is next.  The next goal becomes much more self evident when you use virtue instead of roles as your guide to setting them in my current thinking.

So I have dropped my roles as being my guide to setting my goals or even combining virtues with goals like I did recently. What I want now is nine goals set by the NNV. It’s not that my roles won’t come into the discussion but now each virtue can in a sense touch all of the things I am rather than just one thing.

My foundational virtues of the nine are Honor, Courage and Truth.  They are foundational in my mind because they touch all aspects of life.  They guide me in all decisions.  This includes the goals I set.  I am going to take each virtue every week and reflect on it for that week and comment on progress toward a goal for that virtue which I will set here in this first few posts of A Skald’s Life. Let’s begin.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

I suppose Honor is more popularly defined as that feeling of self-worth.  I find honor to be an internal thing and the hardest virtue of them all.  Mostly I look at it as the ability to look in the mirror and be proud of who you are, but also maintain humility in the fact you can recognize honor in others.  In my life the first part is a struggle.  I have made some very bad decisions this year and I am a man trying to get back on his feet as far as humble pride in himself.

If there is a goal here it is to look at my life more positively.  To see that there is still much I can do that is right and that this can lead me back to a feeling like I have value to myself and that others value me as well.  Honor is the hardest but also the most necessary of the virtues.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

The real trick of this virtue is first knowing what the right thing to do is and then secondly doing it.  I have been accused of being a coward at times but mostly I look at it as having the courage to walk away from a bad situation too.  I do question this at times but in truth an enemy rarely respects your courage even when you show it.  Courage is for conflicts and they are sometimes good things if faced bravely.  That said some conflicts cannot be won and you must have the courage with yourself to face that as well. It takes courage sometimes to realize if a battle cannot be won, then the brave thing to do is not fight it. Live to fight another day when the odds are more in your favor.  Timing.  Knowing when to be courageous is also important.

My goal here is pretty simple:  When I know the right thing to do, I do it.  Despite what I said above, my problem is to over think things instead of acting on my first instincts as to what is right.  Once you know the right thing to do and when to do it, then act.  That’s the goal here for me.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

People have called me a liar too. I would say; however, I have probably been more committed to this virtue than I ever was as a Christian.  The problem with being a minister is you find yourself telling lies very quickly if you want to protect your reputation as well as the reputation of those under your care. Facing the truth is not something church people actually do very well.  Particularly when comparing themselves to the ethical standards of Scriptures.  Now, I don’t really have any other issue other than discovering what is true.  People may not accept this from me, but I have been painfully truthful far more since I gave up my faith than when I was in it. My goal here is to continue to improve and face the truth even about the most difficult things – especially myself.

My goal is here is to be the one who pursues truth and stands with it regardless of where it might take him.  This is my pilgrimage – knowledge, wisdom and truth – finding them and living by them,

Summary:

The real problem with these goals is that they are hard to measure and are not specific.  That is however why they are also foundational as they really reflect attitudes and states of character I want to have at all times.  The other virtues will probably create more specific and measurable goals but these three are about every thought, feeling and decision.

Goal List:

  1. Be positive about my future
  2. Act with courage at the right time
  3. Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times

Until the Business Virtues,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – A Few Blog Notes

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

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I know it seems a little early for writing notes and changes but there is sometimes things you do not discover until a blog actually launches.

  1. I have to actually insert photos on this blog template.  The featured photo actually shows up now in the upper part of the blog as the background.  Makes it hard to reference your featured photo if you can only really partially see it. It actually makes the featured photo aspect of WordPress a little useless on this template.
  2. I looked up blog traffic in the past and I discovered that the time most people read during the week is mostly anytime between 3 and 6 PM.  So I am going to drop my weekday posts at 3 PM from now on.  Weekends people read all over the place depending on the weekend, so I will continue to drop weekend posts at 10 AM.
  3. I need for my family to know that this blog will not be referencing my feelings that much unless they directly affect my goals and objectives.  I also will only reference my marriage to speak positively of it.  The negative stuff and the struggles will only then be referenced if they end in a victory.  Otherwise, the gossips will be disappointed with this blog.  Sorry, I need to write for therapy again but not the way I have done in the past.
  4. This blog will have Pages for the main types of posts to group them together.  Their links should be up at the top of the blog where it currently says ‘Home’ and ‘Contact the Rabyd Skald’.  Pages are a little extra work for me but they do make a good way to organize the main branches of the blog.

Hopefully I can sort out some of the other issues as they come up.  There are always bugs and glitches you need to work on at any new start-up.  Thanks for reading.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – Introducing ‘The Grey Wayfarer’

/ Ed Raby Sr / 2 Comments

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A little history first about me and blogging. 

I have been blogging for long time.  I started my first blog when my kids were little and I was in my first church as a senior pastor.  Basically at the time, it was me trying to put my theological studies degree to good use as most people in the church can’t think at that kind of deep level when it comes to God. So, I started being the Rabyd Theologian which endured its 2.0 and 3.0 versions.  I found I liked to write fiction as well, particularly fantasy, urban fantasy and science fiction. So, I began to add that into the mix and I have had several blogs along that line.  I have written blogs on weightlifting, hiking and other subjects.  Very few survive to this day.  My goal with every blog is for it to be my last one because it lasts and that is true of The Grey Wayfarer as well.

My two most recent blogs I had to delete because they represented a time in my life of forbidden love, lust, anger and pure rage. They were blogs where the Wolves definitely were more in charge than the Ravens.  This comes from an expression I use that has become part of my personal canon: “It’s OK to feed the Wolves, but listen to the Ravens first.” I will be going into this expression more as time goes by on this blog. “Of Wolves and Ravens” is actually the title of my Tuesday posts which will be centered on this new philosophy and applying it to life.

Other people were also misinterpreting my writing and twisting my posts to mean things they did not. One of the most amusing was taking some of my fictional works as factual which they were not. They may have represented heart-felt fantasy but they certainly weren’t real or based on real life events.  I also commented on my personal life a lot which caused some people to be agitated because they disagreed with my observations. This all culminated in one commentator blasting me in a comment – it was bombastic with a lot of name calling. I also realize both blogs represented a chapter in my life I would wish to just close and move on to better ones. The situation was not constructive to positive change for me, so I talked with my wife and I deleted both blogs. We dealt with the person involved as a couple and so far things seem to be stable since.

The problem has been for me that without blogging my life seems very much adrift. I am struggling with school and even though my marriage seems better, I seem to be losing track of what I ultimately want for me and my marriage as well as other things. My struggles with faith have come to a standstill and several emotional issues are just not being resolved.   I am not writing about these things and so I am not making progress. Blogging has been my personal therapy for a long time and without it I am not sure what I am doing with my life. #True Story

Some have argued a private journal might be good substitute, but I have tried that before so many times and I get about a day or two into it and hate it.  I give up pretty quick and then I am stuck.  There is something about posting things on a blog and making them public that drives me to hit my deadlines and do what I need to do.  Maybe it’s ego or some desire for recognition or perhaps a kind of accountability.  Whatever it is though, it keeps me making progress, so it can’t be all bad.  The one thing I do know now after doing this for a while is that I know what kind of blog I need and one that I will stick with and keep writing posts for every day.  So without further ado – The Grey Wayfarer

The Grey Wayfarer

I have been doing this for a few blogs now where a title for a type of post becomes the title for the new blog. Or a concept from one blog inspires the next. My theology blogs became a theology tavern of sorts in All Things Rabyd.  The theology tavern concept became Raby’s Tavern (deleted).  That blog had a kind of post called The Rabyd Microphone which became a blog by the same name (also deleted).  One of the fictional series I was doing on the Rabyd Microphone was The Grey Wayfarer.  It was steeped in Norse Mythology and was an allegory of what I was going through each week.  I enjoyed writing it and to be honest the title sticks with where I think I will be the rest of my life.  I like it, so it has now become the title of this blog.

“The Grey” part has meant a lot of things over the years but in this blog its my reflection on the depression I suffer from time to time which I call ‘The Grey’.  More recently it reflects my desire to be neutral and open to all ideas and opinions.  To evaluate not as a good person or bad person but just as a human being.  Someone walking The Grey of life, so to speak.

“Wayfarer” is something I consider myself these days from a spiritual point of view, although I would love to do more real life walking and hiking as well. But mostly. I just consider myself a pilgrim and a seeker on a spiritual journey these days.  To be honest, I don’t know if I want to stop being a pilgrim or seeker. I think the moment you think you have arrived and discovered THE TRUTH is when you are blind, lost and not moving in life.  I simply wish to be the ever wandering pilgrim, ever searching for truth, knowledge and wisdom in the world.

‘The Grey Wayfarer” also reflects some of my favorite characters of fiction and mythology. Gandalf the Grey being known as the ‘The Grey Pilgrim’ for starters.  Odin from the Norse myths though is my particular inspiration as a grey pilgrim wandering the realms in search of knowledge, accompanied only by his wolves and ravens. Yes, that is the image that is the inspiration for this blog and for my life these days. Being mindful of the expression – “Not all who wander are lost”.  That includes me because more than the blog title, I consider myself ‘The Grey Wayfarer’.  I am not lost, but I do wander.

Probably the best way to get across what you will be seeing here on this blog is to give you the rundown on the schedule for the week.

Sunday – The Pagan Pulpit. I kind of miss putting together a religious service and now that I am no longer a pastor or even a Christian, I don’t get the chance.  For those of you familiar with The Rabyd Microphone before it was deleted, this will combine some elements of the original Pagan Pulpit, the Rabyd Poet and The Rabyd Record.  So it will have songs, a poem (maybe written by me), a meditation, a quote from an ancient text and a sermon with three points. Kind of just an inspiration to start your week, if you’re a deistic humanist pagan like me.

Monday – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues. – A discussion on the Virtues of Honor, Courage and Truth.  Much like the journal posts of the past although I have dropped the idea of roles and now will be focused on virtues setting my goals instead.  I consider these three of the Nine Noble Virtues to be foundational and merit that kind of discussion.

Tuesday – “Of Wolves and Ravens” –  Basically taking an issue and examining from the standpoint of the Wolves (Need and Want) and the Ravens (Thought and Memory).  A philosophical post basically looking at issues and hopefully generating more light than heat.

Wednesday – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues. – Much like Foundational Virtues but a discussion on the virtues of Self-Reliance, Industriousness, and Hospitality.

Thursday – “Odin’s Eye” –  I am a trained and educated Biblical Scholar and Theologian.  A retired pastor with 20 years experience.  What to do with that now that I am not a Christian or a pastor?  I am going to write on four subjects each week with this post – faith, religion, theology and spirituality.  Part of this will be me working though my personal struggles with religion and faith.  The rest we will see each week what happens.

Friday – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues. – Like Foundational Virtues and Business Virtues but dealing with the virtues of Discipline, Perseverance and Fidelity.

Saturday – The Grey Wayfarer – My one fictional element of this blog because I need to write fiction. This is an allegorical fantasy serial story of a man from the modern world who finds himself in most extraordinary circumstances.  The idea will be to reflect on the Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) in a different way as well as get my creative juice flowing.  It will be steeped in Norse mythology, so that should be fun as well.

The Rabyd Skald – This is a post much like The Microphone was on The Rabyd Microphone – it can drop at any time and can be on anything.  It’s basically a catch-all if something doesn’t fit into the weekly routine. Most posts will drop at 10 AM.  This one could be anytime.

This weekly routine will start on October 7th.  Before that I will be doing all three A Skald’s Life posts to set my goals from October 2nd through 4th.  On October 5th, I will do the first installment of Odin’s Eye to kind of set off where my struggle with faith and religion currently is at; as well as recap briefly how I got to this point. On October 6th, I will introduce The Grey Wayfarer fiction serial.  After that the normal schedule will commence.

Now, one final word on the nature of these posts and the blog as a whole.  This is new blog, and while it has at its roots the substance of the old blogs and its trunk is hopefully all the aspects of what makes good writing, it is its own tree, so to speak. Where its main branches, tributaries and twigs end up is anyone’s best guess. I have come to the belief that the best blogs are a good blend of organization (pruning) and organic growth (freedom). You never know down which branch the best flowers and fruits will be discovered.  A balance of reasonable inquiry and creative discovery is what I am going for here.

A word on feedback – I welcome it as long as its constructive.  I welcome comments, likes and even criticism.  Name calling; however, is never accepted.  I have in the past, once I cleared a particular commentator, let people comment away; because I trusted they had a basic understanding of manners and respect of others’ opinion including mine.  Recent events have caused me to institute a complete approval of every comment instead now.  Sorry for the inconvenience this may cause, but you can also follow my page on Facebook and comment there.  I might edit any comment too, so be advised.  This is my blog and I will protect and honor those who respect that fact.  Otherwise, be prepared to be silenced, censored or even blocked.  I welcome opinions, not being an asshole.  You can cuss and swear ( I certainly will do so from time to time including the f-bomb) just don’t make it personal.  This is an adult blog as far as content and expectations of how people will comment on it.

Oh, one last thing (really this time).  New signature:

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!