Spirituality

Of Wolves and Ravens – Courage: Becoming the Bear

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day:

Discussion:

My first run though in Of Wolves and Ravens with the schedule I will probably focus on the Nine Noble Virtues, the second time I will focus on the flip side. In the case of courage, the other side is Western Philosophy.  Last week it was pretty easy to mesh the ideas of Honor and Eastern Philosophy. This week was becoming a challenge until I realized that part of Western philosophy is the Viking Philosophy of Courage. Much of this is related to their understanding of bears.

The vikings revered bears on a very spiritual level.  The admired them to be sure for their raw power and courage, but it was the fact that one could encounter a bear in the wild and that bear would not act in fear in the presence of man.  I am fairly certain while bears might note man’s presence, they give him little regard as far as being a threat. It was this philosophy indeed that led some to become Berserkers. Men who would work themselves up into a fearless frenzy invoking the spirit of the bear.

Courage as a Virtue for me has been a challenge.  In large part I think my Christianity is to blame. Modern Western Christianity both lessens the potential of women by keeping them in a subservient role to men and emasculates men by forcing men to deny their more basic masculine instincts.  Both of these issues cause both men and women to act with less courage than they should.

For myself I have had to reevaluate what it means to be a man and part of that has involved facing the fact that as a Christian, I was not as courageous as I should have been. If there is a spiritual reason for my rejection of Christianity outside my four theological objections, it is this attempted emasculation of men by Christianity as it stands today. For me this embracing courage and facing life more as a man of courage is central now to my philosophy.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

See the source image

This quote from the Havamal shows the need for courage on a deeply spiritual level.  The times one should have acted in courage but didn’t will haunt you and leave you without peace of mind. Regret is the final outcome of cowardice and it makes a man less of a man and a woman less of a woman. Mankind needs courage.

Wants (Freki):

I want courage as well as it allows me to achieve more than I could without it.  Taking action is the way to greater things and that requires courage.  I have come to realize that procrastination may very well be at times an act of cowardice, because I don’t want to take a risk on certain things. Other times it might be I am still thinking on it to long or I lack industriousness that I need as well, but there are a few acts of procrastination that should and would not happen if I simply had the courage to act.

Reason (Huginn):

Being reasonable about courage is hard.  But you cannot deny as a rational person that courage is something that is at times rational, because without it many things that are beneficial cannot be achieved.  There is of course a difference between being courageous and being foolhardy. The difference is found in whether the act has a rational outcome believe it or not.  Does the act of courage lead to self-exaltation and to no positive outcome, or does it lead to the protection of all that one holds sacred and achievement of goals that are beneficial.

See the source image

Wisdom (Muninn):

Wisdom is hard with this one other than to say that courage is not always found in the big actions that we often say are acts of courage but in the small actions of living life and going forward each day.  The Viking philosophy of how one dies is important, but I can only face my actual death once.  I face life every single day and there are multiple acts of courage and confidence I need to do so.  Courage is far more regularly needed in living life than the one-act of death I will face.

Conclusion:

I would say the Viking philosophy of courage is true.  It is needed, wanted and it is both rational and wise to be a courageous person. The Spirit of the Bear needs to be invoked regularly. Something I need to embrace far more for my own benefit and the benefit of those I love and that which I hold dear. The journey of the Grey Wayfarer is hopefully going to be a long one and will require many more acts of courage to be a good one. May I take each action with courage.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Skald Tales and Poems – Poem – “Soul Blood”

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day

“Soul Blood”

I remember in the heat of summer,

where blood poured from my soul.

Wounds received from terrible blades

from the front, behind and within.

 

Shades of crimson flecked with gold

Pooling beneath my feet and pouring over my hands

As they tried to stop the bleeding.

Vainly they tried.

 

Weak I was on my knees

Destroyed and anemic

My heart slowing

Empty, alone, dying

 

Echos of the voices that wielded the blades – mocking me

A good friend becomes betrayer

A lover becomes a stranger

My own silent faith, echoing in my ears.

 

For days I bled, with no hope.

Until the one I betrayed saw my wounds

She did not raise her own blade in vengeance

Rather she touched my soul with her healing hand.

 

The bleeding stopped just in time.

Her own soul blood poured into me and restored my soul

She closed the wounds with stitches of compassion

I now bleed no more.

 

The scars remain forever

Reminders of who wasn’t true.

But my soul’s blood pumps strong once more

Reminding me of she who became my Eir

A Poem by Edward W. Raby, Sr. – January 14th, 2019

Author Notes:

O have written this poem over the last week or so.  Finishing it on the 14th of January 2019.

In this poem I have been trying to capture the feelings of the month of August 2018.  Feelings that are strong and were at the time devastating. I came up with the title of soul-blood as a way describe it.  I then ran with the concept.

Emotionally this was difficult as one as on the one hand every time I write a poem I am reminded of the person who helped me understand and write them better.  “Lover becomes a stranger” is her line and it still hurts to think on it.  The scar throbs when I write a poem because of her, so to speak.

One the other hand, I have for the first time ever in this poem truly used my wife as an inspiration for the poem.  She is my Eir.  Eir being the Valkyrie known for her healing ability.  My wife became my Eir that month.  She has been so ever since and of all people she had the least reason to take on that role.  The Valkyrie I waited for at the time was her in the end.

Hope you enjoy this poem and I always appreciate comments on my poems as I still am very new to this.

Thanks for reading,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – Unlocking My Meditation

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

This week I am looking a tweaking certain things about my routines so I am going to look at each journal post and see what needs to be tweaked.  Under Foundation Virtues is some discussion my Morning Routine and Bucket List and oddly enough they are going to go together.  The way they are going together is through meditation.

One of my only concerns with the Morning Routine has been meditation.  I originally thought what I need to do is formalize things a bit.  Make them more structured.  I think that will happen, but I now feel I shouldn’t look at it that way.   I would rather look at it as making changes to unlock the potential of mediation for myself.

What I picture is meditation on the Nine Noble Virtues, picking one principle from one of them to meditate on, then meditating on one of my goals, and one bucket list item. This would involve a nine-day rotation.  It would then end with emptying my mind and doing a basic relaxation technique. I have nine virtues, nine goals and nine principles.  The only problem is I have ten bucket list items so it would involve removing one of them.

I have been debating the use of aids on this.  Most notably a candle and a symbol focus. The symbol focus I have used and it would probably be the Valknut. I am thinking a medallion that after meditation I can wear around my neck as a constant reminder.  The candle is also a focus I have used in the past and it a powerful one where I have gotten so lost in meditation that I lose track of time.  I am going to try a candle with a timer from my smart phone to offset this potential ‘problem’. Position has always been an issue and  I am going to go lotus for a while.  It usually hurts my knees but mostly I think that is because I am not used to it.

So far there are several things I do that are going to stay.  1) Nine Noble Virtues – Meditation on a virtue or virtues really works.  It definitely is a much higher thing to meditate, on than what I want to do that day. I may however add meditation on the higher virtues as well. 2)  Nudity – I have to say there is something very beneficial about literally throwing off all encumbrance, including clothing, to meditate.  No clothes and the only jewelry I wear is my wedding band. There is something very liberating, free and open about this state when meditating.

The main goal now is to unlock the potential of this part of my morning routine so that I gain insight, enlightenment, a positive mental state and motivation from it.  The ultimate goal is to have a highly effective ten minutes of meditation that accomplishes all of this regularly.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – Be positive about my future

Meditation has also been very instrumental in getting me back into a more positive attitude and mental state about my future and giving me that much-needed self-examination that leads to a sense of self-worth. A sense of honor is something I have gained while meditating.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Sometimes the right thing to do and when to do it is not clear.  I have found mediation to be the key at times in discovering both.  Then all that remains is to actually act and meditation can steel my heart to do that.  Meditation helps with courage.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times.

I cannot underestimate the number of times clarity, enlightenment, insight and other things like this have been part of my mediation results. Truth has been unlocked at certain times, and for that I am very grateful.

Higher Virtue: Love:

A feeling of well-being and a feeling of being loved and loving are sometimes very present in my meditation times. I guess in many ways it is how I have learned to love my wife more and more each day.  It has at least been a tool for unlocking my understanding of my love for her and I would say some of the same mental state of openness and freedom has slipped over into the times we make love as well.  Love of life and the world around me is a very present feeling when I meditate as well and I want to unlock that further.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) and Principles
  2. Meditation
  3. Review Goals
  4. Review Bucket List
  5. Full Body Stretch
  6. Breakfast
  7. Supplements and Medicines
  8. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  9. Get Dressed for the Day

I have made the line for meditation just that.  The process inside of this simple word will be written down in my paper journal until it becomes more automatic. Much of what happens in routines is that I have to follow what I want by looking at a list at first.  This can be clumsy and awkward at first but the more I do it, the more natural it becomes. Meditation changes will be like that too but I think it will be worth it.

As a side note my meditation time spills over into my full body stretch and I am thinking of doing some more yoga type stretches with this.

Bucket List:

  1. Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.
  2. Get My Tattoos.
  3. Actually Get Drunk.
  4. Smoke a Joint.
  5. Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
  6. Write My Novel.
  7. Learn Latin.
  8. Learn Hungarian.
  9. Weightlifting – Bench 225 lbs, Squat 315 lbs, and Deadlift 405 lbs.

Removed starting my own business. As I look to the future this bucket list item will be a goal under something involving my career eventually.  It will make its way to my goal list eventually so it isn’t really gone, just shifted in timing and placement.

Weightlifting:

This is one activity that meditation is a big part of when I do it.  Every set is preceded by a mental focusing and as the set is being done, mental focus is very important. It is this meditational aspect that I miss just as much as the challenge of the iron.  I will hopefully get back to this soon. I have the money now to get a gym membership going at least.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – Feeding Wolves and Listening to Ravens

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sun’s Day.  

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: “In The Year of the Wolf” – Motorhead

Poem: “My White Raven” by Just Patty

See the source image

As I was doing some poetry searches for the pulpit this week I found this poem.  It is a pretty tribute using the wolf and raven analogy and I must say it made me tear up a little.

Meditation:

See the source image

Song of Preparation: Raven Wing – Iced Earth:

Text:

“It’s OK to Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens First” – Ed Raby, Sr.

Sermon:

I suppose it was inevitable that I would include a quote form myself eventually in the Pagan pulpit. This one came to me sometime this last summer but it really didn’t become the mainstay of my philosophy until after the first week of August or so.  A reflection of lessons learned and a change of heart at that point in my life.  I have a poem I am working on that reflects some things that happened at that time.  Mostly though I came up with this line at that time that pretty much sums up a major tenet of my philosophy these days.  The core of it is this notion of Wolves – Needs and Wants  and Ravens – Reason and Wisdom.  This of course has been the core of the whole Of Wolves and Ravens series on philosophy, but I haven’t written directly on this expression in a bit and it bears repeating.

“It’s OK to feed the Wolves…”

It is OK to fulfill your needs and wants.  It’s OK.  I know religion and other forces want to act as some sort of control mechanism of defining good and evil, but in truth I am not sure such a distinction truly exists.  There are simply some ways of feeding the wolves that are not reasonable; nor are they wise.  As I pointed out last week, I don’t sit there waiting for someone else to make the moral decisions of my life for me. I make them myself, as it is truly only my responsibility to make them.  That said, I don’t think what I need and want is necessarily evil or bad in and of itself.  It is often how those needs and wants are met; what decisions are made in how to meet them, that either makes them beneficial or a detriment.

“…but Listen to the Ravens First.”

That’s where engaging our Reason and Wisdom before we just run off and start pursuing the fulfilling of our needs and wants.  To think about how thy should be pursued and for what reason is key.  Reason and Wisdom need to guide our pursuit.

It is probably and interesting thing in nature that Wolves and Ravens enjoy each other’s company in the wild.  They seem actually to look out for one another.  Wolves benefit from the advantage of having eyes in the sky and that caw from the ravens when something is nearby and the Ravens benefit from both company and the protection of the pack when they eat.

There is a lesson in all that for making sure that Needs, Wants, Reason and Wisdom work in harmony. The Ravens don’t Decry the Wolves and the Wolves don’t ignore the Ravens.  The respect each other and work together.  These forces in our lives should be made to do the same,

I don’t know if this saying; which as far as I can tell is my own creation, might of helped you today.  I just know when things get tough I bring it to my mind and ask what needs or wants do I need to fulfill and what the most reasonable and wise course of action might be to fulfilling them.  I feed my inner wolves, but I listen to the my inner ravens first.

Closing Song: Unwell – Matchbox Twenty

I found myself revisiting this song this week.  I guess when I fight depression it becomes a song of hope for me.  It’s doesn’t fit the Wolves and Ravens theme, but it makes sense for my week. This has been on of those ‘loss of interest’ depression battle weeks, but I think I am coming out on the other side of it now and mostly it is because of this song.

Parting Thought:

See the source image

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – My Deism

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

 

Happy Thor’s Day

I suppose my belief system is a little complicated. However, at its root or its central tenet is being a deist. However my deism, is not of the same flavor as most people would think of it; nor is it classical deism. Some of the things classical deism upholds, I have modified a little.

  1. Deism would maintain at single creator based on reason.  I would say based on reason, you can’t dismiss the idea of a group of powerful beings being the creators following a common plan or that the universe itself is the creator. I hold out a lot of possibilities here as far as what the guiding force behind our origin might be, if any.
  2. I do maintain with the deists that there is an order and complexity to the universe that imply a creator or creators of some kind.
  3. I agree that there is a limit to human knowledge and understanding that makes it hard; if not impossible, to understand the full nature of the divine.
  4. What ever divine power or powers exist have given man his faculties to both create and uphold his own ethical and moral principles.
  5. Human beings should indeed be free to find, know and worship these divine force or forces in their own way. All views of the divine are to be respected as long as they don’t violate the rights of others.
  6. All human beings are equal creations of this divine power. As such they are accorded rights based on that natural equality.  I do have some things I debate about rights at this point though. More on that at some other time.

Faith:

As far as faith in the divine goes, I have faith that something exists at the present.  I have an active faith in the existence of something divine. I must state for the record, that I can no longer dismiss the notion that the atheist might be right but at the same time I simply do not think humanity has achieved a level of knowledge that can say – “There is No God” with 100% confidence. I believe there is something out there that we cannot comprehend and that no religion can truly explain.

Religion:

I maintain that people have their right to any religion they like including the right to not have one at all.  I draw the line however with any religion whose followers want to impose their views, ethics and moral code on others.   If you use your religion to justify harming others or force them to take certain actions because of it; I would say that is wrong as well. Religion is very much like a penis, as one actress in a movie remarked, and should have the same societal limitations.

See the source imageTheology:

As a long time theologian ( yes, I have degrees in Biblical Studies and Theology), I used to rely on special revelation; namely the Holy Bible of Protestant Christianity, for my foundation for my work in theology.  Having come to recognize fully that the Bible is a fully human book and that the divine has little to do with, I have to look at how to understand the divine differently.

There is no such thing as special revelation in the sense any so-called holy book is a direct revelation of God. You might find the divine revealed in the human thoughts that are presented in such books; as the authors discuss and tell you what they think about the divine, but those thoughts are human not divine.  To do theology as a deist, I am left with my own reason as I observe the world around me.  I am left with my human facilities alone as I observe and think about the divine.  Part of that is perhaps looking at religions to find certain foundational beliefs common to all that can be helpful in this process, but no one stands the divine better than another.  They all may have some truth, but none of them have THE TRUTH.

Spirituality: 

Deism allows me to engage one other thing and that is to explore the possibility that there is more to humanity than the biochemistry we are left with, if we remove the divine from the equation.   That there is a possibility that man is more than body, mind and emotions but has a spiritual side and an immortal soul. I probably engage this with my more pagan side of my belief system, but it is deism that opens the door to it.

Conclusion: 

I have fully embraced the notion of pursuing the real divine that actually exists without special revelation.  Natural revelation makes things far more interesting and to be honest, more difficult.  But there is a greater honesty to deism as compared to religious pursuits of the divine that I used to embrace.  Only time will tell where this will lead me.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens – Honor: The Most Difficult Virtue

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Tyr’s Day 

When considering the lineup for Of Wolves and Ravens a couple of weeks ago, it was no accident that I coupled Honor with Easter Philosophy.  The Code of Bushido is a warrior code like the Nine Noble Virtues of Asatru (NNV) and there are many similarities.  The Samurai had seven or eight (depending on who you read) noble virtues where the vikings had nine but most of them overlap. There great similarities between the two codes.  I could have chosen it for my own personal code, but I chose a warrior code more fitting to my interests and heritage.  I do have a great respect for the Code of Bushido. It is the notion of honor in both codes that however is my interest today, so a consideration of both codes’ definition of honor might be enlightening.

Nine Noble Virtues Definition of Honor:

Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world

Code of Bushido Definition of Honor:  

A vivid consciousness of personal dignity and worth

I think the two are very similar.  Both involve that feeling or sense (vivid consciousness)  of personal dignity and value one has for yourself. If there is any addition, it is the NNV adds the notion of acknowledging said honor when it is perceived in others. Showing respect for those that you can see have their own sense of honor is part of the NNV.  The Code of Bushido has Respect as a separate virtue, so it splits the idea in the NNV notion of Honor into two separate virtues honor and respect.

The point I am making here is that despite the two codes being separated in their origin by a considerable geographical distance, there is a similar human quality of honor that is recognized in both. Inner value and dignity are human traits that both codes encourage and admire.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

Do we need honor?  I think that the notion of personal dignity says yes we do.  A person who has a sense of dignity certainly is far more useful to themselves and to others. Without this sense of dignity, I think we see people fade into nothing both personally and from a societal standpoint both spiritually and emotionally.  I watch people who I can tell have no sense of personal dignity.  They give no thought to how they are presenting themselves to others, because they really don’t value themselves and it shows. There is a certain kind of pride that is needed to be a decent human being, and it is the spiritual need for honor.

Wants (Freki):

We also want honor in our lives.  It is the foundation for being respected.  If one does not respect themselves; no one else will.  Honor is a very individual quality that should be greatly desired.  I can’t stress this enough given that last year, I did some very dishonorable things.  The biggest loss I felt was this sense of honor.  Without it, I became very vulnerable.  I want honor to combat this vulnerability.  Other people’s’ opinions of you matter far less when you have a sense of honor. It is good to desire it and obtain it.

Reason (Huginn):

The problem of course in how to get it.  Well, you don’t get it from others.  Reason tells me that if I rely on others for my sense of honor, I will become their slave. If I want to be free, the only one that can develop a sense of honor in my life is me.  I must choose to be my own master and develop my own sense of dignity and value.  You will never find dignity and value in pleasing others.  Slavery is all you will get from that, and no slave has any sense of self value or dignity. If ‘a slave’ did have those qualities, then they are not truly slaves no matter what their social status is.

Wisdom (Muninn):

Wisdom also warns me that the only one who can destroy my sense of honor is also myself. This is what make honor the most difficult virtue. It is hard to gain but even harder to maintain.  As needed a virtue as it is, no matter how much we want it and how much it benefits us; we can destroy it with our own actions. This is a lesson I learned this last summer (2018) and one I plan on making sure is burned deep into my soul from now until my death.

Conclusion:

Honor will probably be something I wrestle with for the rest of my life.  I take the lessons from the Code of Bushido and use them to improve my understanding of the code of follow in the NNV. In this I know need and want honor.  It is a spiritual need that strengthens me when fulfilled.  I also know that I alone can build it and I alone can destroy it in myself.  Lessons learned that need to be applied from now until the end for me.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – Freedom and Moral Responsibility

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sun’s Day.  Back to the Pagan Pulpit as normal. 

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: Freedom – Alice Cooper:

I suppose it was only a matter of time before Alice Cooper made his way to my  pagan pulpit songs.  I love this video more than the song as it was the spectacle that was a show by Alice. His musicians were buff too.    Mostly its the line – free to rock and free to talk.

Poem: “The New Colossus” – Emma Lazarus

Image result for the new colossus

I have always loved this poem.  It seems these days to many Americans forget that most of us started as refuges and refuge from other lands. Liberty is why people came here and it should still be true that all who seek liberty should be granted it.

Meditation:

Image may contain: one or more people, meme and text

Song of Preparation: Free Fallin’ – Tom Petty:

Miss Tom Petty but his song live on and this one has been a favorite of my when I am free-falling in my thoughts.

Text: I am Free – Robert A. Heinlein

“I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.” – Robert A. Heinlein

Sermon:

It was only a mater of time before I got to a quote from Robert Heinlein.  The science fiction writer from the Golden Age of Science fiction was also a libertarian, nudist and political philosopher but he is most known for his science fiction which did have a profound impact on society particularly A Stranger in a Strange Land which influenced 1960s thinking and The Moon is a Harsh Mistress which cannot be underestimated in its influence on  the United States landing on the moon in 1969.

Mostly as I read him, I find an unshakable understanding of the value of human freedom and liberty. Part of this is his rugged belief in the individual needing to be self-sufficient and in that I am completely in agreement with him.  I have been a kindred soul of Mr. Heinlein since I first discovered him back in Bible College.

I meditate on this quote often.  When I was Christian I used to have the belief that people either did what it right out of love for someone else or out of fear of punishment.  For most people I think this is still true, but I think the real problem with both of these is that they are lower forms of moral motivation.  Both of them lack an understanding of freedom and liberty as a motivating factor.  Love of freedom is a higher motivator I think and causes one to be moral even when no one is watching.  Or even when everyone is watching.  Love for others implies I only act morally when I perceive others might be affected negatively.  Fear implies that I only act morally because I want to avoid punishment. Both are outside forces making me be moral; they are not me acting on my own internal morality or taking responsibility for myself in my decisions.

There is a great deal of difference when someone act morally regardless of consequence.  The essence of Heinlein’s quote is that the rules don’t matter.  Love or Fear doesn’t matter.  What matters is regardless I am free to act and in the end it is not love or fear that makes my actions moral but that I choose in freedom what to do. The moral responsibility is mine, regardless of love or fears I might have.

I take responsibility for my actions because they are mine and no one else’s. By the same principle, I don’t take moral responsibility for the choices another makes.  Those choices belong to them; not me.  It is why in relationships, the moral choice question disappears when people are coerced or forced to do something through law or fear. If they are manipulated to a choice, then that is also not a choice in freedom.  It’s why as Libertarian I feel the real immoral forces of this world are the misuse force, threat of force and fraud.  Nothing can be moral when it is influenced by these actions.

If it requires fear or love to be moral, then I am basically saying I have no internal morality.  But once I understand the line: “I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.”  Then I know I am acting freely moral because I have chosen it; not because I was forced or manipulated to it.

I dwell on this quote a lot, mostly because I have been accused of manipulation.  I don’t think people know how repugnant that idea is to me. Too many people live in the love and fear dynamic, and  so they assume I do as well.  I don’t.  I take responsibility for my part in things; but if there is another person involved, they are responsible in equal measure to me.  That’s why my marriage being rocky in the past was both of us.  My affair this summer was both of us. I gladly take my responsibility for my part in both of those things as that is the morally right thing to do, but I hold the other side of both of those relationships responsible for their part in it as well. I don’t let them off the hook for what they did. Some people don’t like that.  Tough rocks.

As I move forward, I want this understanding to guide my decisions.  It lines very much with my concept of honor.  It is not fear of law or god that motivates me.  It is not love for others that motivates me.  It is my own sense of personal honor that I alone am morally responsible for my actions that matters.  Nothing more; Nothing less.

Closing Song: Let it Be – The Beatles:

The Beatles sooner or later would have made the Pulpit, but this week this song seems appropriate to me.  Let it be.

Parting Thought:

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Yes, it is.  Something I am trying to come to grips with lately.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – Establishing a Pattern

/ Ed Raby Sr / 3 Comments

Happy Thor’s Day

I have a similar problem to the one I had in Of Wolves and Ravens in that I need to establish a pattern of posts for Odin’s Eye as well.  I have addressed my four main theological objections to Christianity and probably very soon they will have their own page so people can interact with them in a much more focused manner.  I walk along waiting for people to offer answers to my honest objections and this platform will be for that too as beyond my main four I have many other objections toward Christianity and the Bible being the ‘Word of God’.  Seems like a good discussion topic list for Odin’s Eye.

I will continue to discuss things regarding where I am spiritually. I will continue to discuss Deism, Humanism and Paganism here on Odin’s Eye. I also want to offer up a continuing critique of Christianity, the Bible and other religions.  Plus a general criticism of religion in general can be expected.  Part of my reason for this is to help refine what I am trying to discover, by eliminating what I think is false. So perhaps, the following pattern is good for starters:

Week 1 – Deism

Week 2 – Bible Problems

Week 3 – Humanism

Week 4 – Christianity Problems

Week 5 – Paganism

Week 6 – Religion Problems

Week 7 – The Wayfarer’s Spiritual Side

Week 8 – My Theological Objections to Christianity revisited.

It should be noted as well that for pagan holidays on the calendar I will interrupt this series and write about them.  I am going at pagan holidays from the Norse Viking point of view. The next one is on February 2nd and is called Disting.

What I want to make abundantly clear is this.  Like when I was a Christina theologian, I will always respect a counter argument.  I am not trying to be offensive in my criticism, merely asking a lot of honest questions that need answers, and if you think you have one as a reader, don’t hesitate to give them.  My interest here is not to bash people but to give reason to faith if it can be found.  If not that element of faith is just that – blind trust with no evidence.

I also will remind people at this point that I have degrees in Biblical and Theological Studies.  I don’t mind questions about whether I have considered something, but I do object to assumptions of ignorance.  I guess the problem a lot of Christian and former Christian friends have or might have is this simple point, that I am not just a normal Christian who left his faith.  I used to be a pastor and preacher. I am still knowledgeable about the bible and theology that Christianity employs.

I also have no tolerance for name calling, so if you want to get banned that’s a good way to do it. I work hard to not do it myself, so I expect the same courtesy in return.

I am on an honest search for spiritual truth if it can be found. If you can make me consider something that might lead me to that, I will welcome you with open arms. That would include returning to Christianity, if it could be proven past my theological objections.  My purpose is not to tear down, but to refine and discover. If you enjoy the walk with me as a reader and learn something? Bonus.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – Songs of 2018

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sun’s Day. It is also the 11th Night of Yuletide.  This night is sacred to the Valkyries and Warriors.  We remember those who choose the slain as the noble and honored dead destined for Valhalla, and those warriors who were chosen. Today we remember the virtue of Self-Reliance.

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Today’s service resembles a concert more than a service.  Basically, the idea struck me that I should do the past year, one month at a time, in song.  So there will be no text or sermon today.  Just one song per month (two for one month) representing each month as I experienced it. This probably as much as a reflection on this past year, but rather than write about it, I will just give you a song on each month and a little commentary.

I suppose a warning is in order as I am going to be pretty open here about my thoughts.  I also should note that I had to take a break twice while writing this post.  There are a lot of strong emotional memories to 2018 for me. Some good; some bad.  In any case, my hope is a little more closure on a year I hope to not repeat. Overall it changed me for the better, but it was a helluva ride.

Music for me is still a an expression of the real emotions and thoughts I am having I can’t express in words. I think for this reason this way of doing a year review is probably more accurate in many ways than just writing about it.

January: No Rest for the Wicked – Godsmack:

I choose this song for the theme for the entirety of 2018.  I started with the struggle to be a ‘man of God’ who had lost his faith.  The whole year was me not getting enough rest because of all my struggles.  In the end, I dropped the masks and I am probably far more at rest because I am more genuinely who I really am now.  The verses of this song really reflect some of my thoughts to this day, so it fits.

February: American Pie – Don McLean:

In February, my long time organist and friend died. This represented the last of three great musicians/vocalists in my church and with this death for all practical purposes it was ‘the day the music died’ both in my church and my soul. It was my grief over this, and the fact only one person understood it at the time, that left me vulnerable.

March: Losing my Religion – REM:

March was a transitional month for me as I started to fall in love with someone I shouldn’t have. Looking back on it, and as warning to others, grief over the loss of two good friends in less than a year, a weak marriage and looking for comfort, left me open to this.  That and not caring about my religion anymore.  I had lost my faith a couple of years before due to theological reasons, but now the emotional side of it came crashing down.

April: Don’t Stand So Close to Me – The Police:

Lot’s of secret love this month.  Both directions and both forbidden.  I have come to a greater understanding of this song than I ever wanted to this year. Now when I hear this song, I remember the lessons of this past year vividly. Mostly how easy it is to submit to temptation, especially when you are hurting and want something to ease the pain. There is really no excuse for this, but there are reasons people do this which I now know all too well.  I have no excuses, but I did have those reasons.

May: Monsters – Shinedown:

https://youtu.be/Nll48NdS7q4

The shit hit the fan in late May and my monsters got loose.  I think I made the remark at the time that the Pagan was freed from his cage and was kicking the Christian’s ass. I suppose this song stretches into June as well.

The reason it does, is I trusted someone I considered to be a friend with something important.  They took advantage of that trust and betrayed me to get one more win over me, probably to stroke his already overly inflated ego. Yeah, rage doesn’t begin to describe what I felt when I found that out.  It became greater as more details emerged during the summer and I began to discover how planned and maliciously thought out this betrayal was. It still is something I struggle with and quite frankly I finally found someone I don’t believe I can ever forgive. At least not until the scale of justice gets balanced first. Til then my monsters stay hungry and patiently wait.

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June: Familiar Taste of Poison – Halestorm:

I fell in love with Halestorm this summer.  I also fell fully in love with a young woman.  It’s a decision I now regret. I think the relationship was full of natural chemistry but part of that chemistry was the additional effect of generating a toxicity that was wonderfully deadly. I didn’t want to be saved and I didn’t want to be sober. In the end, I think that toxicity killed it.  I probably should be glad for that, but there is still a sadness and pain to it all for me. This song definitely captures that feeling for me still.

July: 400 Lux – Lorde:

I don’t like describing people as addictions.  It makes them seem like they’re not people but the relationship I had was addicting. Relationships are things. We were always killing time together in July, so the lyrics fit too. It’s no accident I chose the video for this song that has scenes from The Perks of Being a Wall Flower.  It’s a reminder, that life needs to be lived and not just observed.  It’s also a book I probably will not read again for the foreseeable future. Maybe someday I will pick it up again with new eyes, because I really liked it.  There are too many memories associated with it right now. That and the Song All of Me by John Legend. This song by Lorde I can still listen to and remember without it being too painful, but not that one.

August: Stuck with You – Huey Lewis and the News:

August was a roller coaster month.   It was pivotal turning point.  I went from being very special to the young woman in question to becoming someone they used to know in the space of less than a hour. I found a new job, but this happened the same day, so the joy of that disappeared. I found myself alone and bleeding from my soul pretty bad. In that state, I also woke up and began to think that my wife and I could save our marriage.  From my perspective, it was a long shot and I fully expected my wife to tell me to go to hell.

But she didn’t. She accepted my apology and apologized to me in return. We talked, I mean really talked, for the first time in years. It started a healing process that is still in process, but we are better than we have ever been in a long while.  This was the start of that.

Long story short, we found our way back together. In all of this, the only one who really never stopped loving me is her. The only one who exercised ‘Christian’ love, mercy and forgiveness was her.  It overwhelmed me and I fell in love with her again.  We picked this song as our own while on a weekend away.  I am happy to be stuck with her and she is happy to be stuck with me.

September: Love Walks In – Van Halen:

In August I was standing in a convenience store when this song was played.  I started singing it out loud as the cashier was doing so too. He stopped and asked me if it had meaning to me and I said it did now. I continue to play this song on my ‘Wife Playlist’, it makes me think of this moment and her every time.  Throughout September it was my second favorite song next to Stuck With You.

October:  I have two for this month.  Sorry I couldn’t choose just one. 

Both of these songs are on my current walking play list and have been so for a long time. In October as school began in earnest, I found myself listening to them every day. I still do when I listen to music.

Prayer – Disturbed:

It is the way I pray – ‘living isn’t hard enough without ‘god’ making it harder.  I love the lyrics of this song and the feelings behind it. It reflects a lot of my continued struggles with faith.

Voices – Disturbed:

https://youtu.be/pKlg3jYMwRU

I love the video of this song as it reflects the song so well.  I like how the guy is bullied, made fun of and has that girl he likes moment where she dissed him.  He then fantasizes about how to get even with them all – the voices speak in his head.  Instead of acting on them though, he just leaves work and goes to a concert and lets it all go instead.  I listen to this one a lot when I am having dark thoughts.  It helps them simmer down.

November – Hammer to Fall – Queen: 

I include this one for a lot of reasons: 1) The biopic Bohemian Rhapsody was released this month and my daughter and I had a date and went to see it.  Best movie I have seen in a long time.  2) I think in some ways it became a month of returning to ‘normal’ where my wife and I, my family and the friends I have left are back to some sense of stability.  This song kind of is symbolic of that as my daughter and I got back to talking music, books and movies – instead of the chaos of my life. 3) The message of this song.  The hammer is going to fall, so live life fully. 4) Plus it wouldn’t a music list without Queen.

December: Dreams – Van Halen:

https://youtu.be/cG3Vfa6_gCs

Reflective of the end of the year. I graduated college (with a little work to do) and my wife, myself and family have been celebrating the holidays together.  I am starting to dream again about what my life will be.  Dreams are what love is made of according to the song and honestly my life has started to reflect that again.

Parting Thought:

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Wishing you the most prosperous journey as you travel through 2019.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

Odin’s Eye – Objections to Christianity – Part 4 – The Justice of the Biblical God – An Unbalanced Scale

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Thor’s Day.  This is the 8th Night of Yuletide. this night is sacred to Skadi and Ullr – The goddess Skadi is a giantess associated with skiing, bow hunting, winter, and the mountains.  Ullr is the god of snowshoes, hunting, the bow, and the shield. The idea behind this night is hunting and being outdoors. It is also a day to remember those who provide our meals and sustenance. The Virtue remembered tonight is Truth. 

Introduction:

I am wrapping up my four main theological objections to Christianity with the simple but profound fact that the god of the Bible is very suspect in as far as whether or not he is just and acts with justice. I would go so far to say that the god of the Bible does not follow his own clearly stated guidelines for justice – 1) “Eye for eye, tooth for tooth” and 2) Restitution Included. Namely that the punishment should fit the crime and that restitution when merited should be offered.  This is the standard of justice found in the Torah or Law of Moses. Jesus of Nazareth takes this on in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5-7 pointing out that the principles of justice were still valid and in fact because things should be done for the love of god, they were even more challenging.  God expects Christians to still be just and follow his principles of justice. The issue is: does the god of the Bible follow his own rules.  I would say not.

Faith:

From a standpoint of my own faith, the biblical god’s justice, and in particular the doctrine of Hell, has always been a problem.  My standard answer throughout my days as a pastor to others that asked was that the justice of god was a mystery.  That someday, we would know it all and see that this god was just to send people to hell.  Even if they were people who we loved and who this god claimed to love. But it was more than that as some of the stories of god executing justice were a little lacking in justice.  Job’s trial is a good example where God allows the Devil to kill all of Job’s children and servants save a few and does it simply to test Job to see if he will remain faithful.  The Biblical god’s answer of – “I am god, that’s why.” is a little lacking in reasoning for a supreme being for one and the whole situation is lacking in compassion not just for Job but for all the people slain for another.  They all lived and died simply to satisfy a bet between the Devil and the almighty is a little much to reconcile with the idea of God is love.  Stuff like this definitely tests your faith and it should.

Religion:

The thing is most religious responses to the justice of God dilemma either cite ‘mystery’ (read – I don’t have a  good answer, so I am going to punt) or our ignorance.  Simply put they both attempt to give a god a different standard of justice than we follow.  How convenient, but also telling that we cannot even use the standard of justice of ‘eye for eye’ with the biblical god. The very standard that this god gives, he does not follow.

The fact that I used to come up with this double standard for god myself bothered me for years when I realized that is what I was doing.  A standard of justice is only viable if it is evenly applied to all.  It should be logical and consistent enough that it CAN be applied to all without exception. We have learned not to tolerate double standards between those that lead and those that follow so why here?  Why does this god of the Bible get a free pass for being hypocritical?

Religion does its damnedest to keep us from seeing this, and it does it by trying to make God so high his different standard of justice is justified.  It sounds like a ruling religious class seeking to justify why they can impose rules on others that they don’t have to follow themselves.  After all, they are ‘men of god’ and so as Cardinal Richelieu points out in the Three Musketeers movie in 1993 – “The Cardinal is not subject to the laws of men”.  Easy to justify if you create a different standard of justice for your god and you then say you are subject to that standard, not the standard of men.

Theology:

But the Biblical God fails theologically and it comes out best in the doctrine of Hell and final judgment.  Everything we will do is in a short temporal time of existence but everything about the final judgment of the god of the Bible is eternal.  In short, this god is going to punish us in an eternal and permanent way for our behavior in temporal and non-permanent existence.  This includes annihilation and eternal punishment views.  The only thing that might save Christianity here as far as theology is actually the idea of purgatory where the punishment is redemptive and non-permanent.  But even here there is a postulate that punishment can last centuries compared to the shortness of life.

So being burned like the rich man is said to be burned is somehow eye for eye and tooth for tooth?  In that story, the rich man is burned not because he defied god but because he had a good life and Lazarus was rewarded because he had suffered in life.  Go look at the story (Luke 16) yourself, this is the rationale that is given.  So because a guy had it good he is punished with burning fire?  How is this eye for eye? Justice would have been to have the two trade places for a second life, not that he is burned for a long period of time.

There is little justice in this story, just a god who on the one hand in the Old Testament tells people who prosperity is a sign of God’s blessing and then turning around and saying though that if you do become prosperous, the biblical god is going to burn you as punishment for it.  In a full analysis of the biblical account not only are there many accounts where god’s justice is a little suspect but where he violates the very rules he sets forward because he gets jealous or angry. Like the other mythologies, the biblical god is very human and reflects probably more of the attitude of the author of that particular passage than the almighty that actually might exist.

Spirituality:

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For me personally, I come back to the quote I have used before.  If the god or gods are just then they will judge us based on the virtues we lived by.  If they are not just, then they do not deserve to be served.  If there are no gods then, we should live in such a way as to be fondly remembered. I worry less about an afterlife; because regardless, it is this life I must live either way.  I choose to live based on virtue because, in the end, it is all I really have.  My own personal responsibility for the life I live is mine alone. Cue Robert Heinlein.

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Conclusion:

I will revisit these objections in the future with other thoughts.  Odin’s Eye will continue to be a discussion point on faith, religion, spirituality, and theology. I will continue to use it to find a path to knowledge and wisdom. What you may see in the future is me actually deal with more specific Biblical passages and why they are problematic.  There will also be the continued discussions of deism, humanism, and paganism.  I probably will have a more detailed plan next Odin’s Eye.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!