Of Wolves and Ravens – Virtue: Moving Higher

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

Having finished the Nine Noble Virtues it is time to flip the subjects for Of Wolves and Ravens to the flip side.  So for the next nine weeks the subjects will be more Side B

  1. Eastern Philosophy
  2. Western Philosophy
  3. Love
  4. Minimalism
  5. Economics
  6. Justice
  7. Political Science
  8. Libertarianism
  9. Wisdom

These are either the Higher Virtues or other philosophical elements that guide my thinking. Subjects where my philosophy is more real and concretely applied to the real world of my life.

Today, however, we return to the general subject of virtue. Mostly the rationale behind pursuing virtue as opposed to Religion as a way of moving higher.  I suppose it comes back to the Marcus Aurelius quote I keep using.

See the source image

My main issue these days is to live a good life and so following good virtues is the path to that.  The Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) of Asatru are good ones to follow and no matter what your religion or faith, I don’t think you could fault them.  Virtue is a Human trait and if anything is responsible for the good in the world it is when people take their human capacity and guide it by good virtues.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

At this point things will get a little more personal.  After departing from my Christian faith, I knew I would need something to guide my life philosophy. I think that is one of the problems of struggling with faith.  You hold your principles from that faith, but the basis for doing so is missing. I needed to figure out what that basis was and how I could hold a system of philosophy to guide myself and my character without having faith in a religion.  Virtue is an old discussion in philosophy and one that has always had a lot of merit to me. So I found that the need for a system of virtue was very much justified.

Wants (Freki):

I also wanted virtue.  One of the things that you get accused of when you leave the faith is somehow you are now lesser of a person.  It is never said but it is there.  Your ‘lost’, ‘going to follow your sinful nature now’, you are not as ‘good’ in the eyes of the people of the faith you left. Part of my embracing virtue is I want to show how bankrupt a notion it is to believe you need to follow a certain religion or faith to be a good person.  That you can be a better person morally without faith or religion is a hard concept for people to accept for some reason.  I want to prove that it can be done.

Reason (Huginn):

The rational reason for following virtue for me is that it upholds my thoughts that a person can actually use religion for evil while calling themselves good.  After all they are just following their authority of their holy book or holy man.  Even if that action causes harm to others, in religion it is still justified because you were doing what your authority told you.

I can’t do that following my philosophy of virtue.  Virtue demands that an action must also cause no harm to others whenever possible.  It recognizes that appeal to authority is not a rational act but a logical fallacy.  Therefore to just follow authority blindly is not virtuous, rather quite the opposite.

Wisdom (Muninn):

I feel that no matter what the twists and turns of my life are now, that the NNV allows me to navigate each fork and crossroad with wisdom.  I am not letting some blind guide pull me along.  Rather my eyes are open and I makes sure each life decision is guided by principle and virtue.  I do take into account what is best for me, but I also no longer think that shows a lack of wisdom but rather it demonstrates wisdom.

Conclusion:

On May 28th, 2018 I was no longer a pastor or a Christian officially. I even have a letter from my former church that fired me retroactively to May 27th to prove it. I keep that letter because there is a line in it that motivates me. From time to time I pull it out and read it:

“This decision was based on the fact that you no longer have the character, ability or right to be the shepherd of any flock”

Well, I plan on making them eat those judgmental and arrogant words and I plan on doing it by living a better life than I ever had as a Christian.  I plan on doing that by following virtue.  By so doing, I will move higher than I ever have before. I don’t see my leaving the flawed hypocritical virtues of Christianity to follow the NNV as a step downward, but rather a step upward. Time the pierce the sky and live a good life.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – The Book of Rabyd 1:5 -“Everyone Has the Right to Property”

Happy Sun’s Day:

Announcements: 

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: “Mr. Roboto” – Styx

I was joking this week with my daughter about using this song as a song about my grandson Otto.  All I would have to do is change the words a little to make this song about him.  That said, this actually is a pretty cool song made for a rock opera that dealt with dystopian future where rock and roll as well as other forms of free expression are outlawed.  Styx always was very good and their vocalist has a ton of range in this one.

Poem: “The Storm” by Edward W. Raby, Sr.:

Image result for odin wanderer storm

Wind, grey skies and pouring rain.

The Storm rages in my soul.

Fed by my inner pain.

Will I ever be whole?

Lightning flashes

Thunder rolls

I tighten my grip on the staff of my reality

Knowing only the treading of my feet

Boots grinding through grey mud

Soaked in sorrow, but my heart closed

Numb to the cold of The Grey

I struggle onward, not daring to feel

Lest my tears join the flood

And drown me in the rising tide.

I walk with the hope of seeing sunlight

I walk with the hope of feeling love

But right now, I feel nothing

So I will survive.

Soon, the wolf within will rise

The ravens will caw again

when the light breaks through.

Then I will laugh,

Once again I have become the storm

And I have become stronger

Note: This is still in rough draft form, but it is good enough I think to at least post it.  It needs refining but I like how it captures my struggles with depression at times. I will probably present this poem in it own post when it is more refined.

Meditation:

Image may contain: 1 person, text that says 'WHEN THINKING ABOUT LIFE, REMEMBER: NO AMOUNT OF GUILT CAN SOLVE THE PAST, AND NO AMOUNT OF ANXIETY CAN CHANGE THE FUTURE THEMINDUNLEASHED UNLEASHED'

Song of Preparation: “It’s My Life” – Bon Jovi

Text: 

Everyone has the Right to Property – The Book of Rabyd 1:5

Sermon:

This is a new verse for the Book of Rabyd.  Most people don’t realize that the original Declaration of Independence had originally ‘life. liberty and property’.  Later editing changed it to the pursuit of happiness.  But the idea of the inherent right to property to anyone who owns it is something that has not always been recognized in history.  That changed with the Founding fathers as the notion of people having a right to translate their right to pursue their happiness.  As Ayn Rand wisely pointed out this means the right to property.

I would argue that this right is what defends the others as well.  Your Life. liberty and Pursuit of Happiness are yours and now one should be allowed to take them away from you.  This means you also have the right to defend what is yours.  But ownership of property being a right extends to all things that are yours.  The most important of which is ownership of self.  Self-ownership means to take responsibility for yourself and your own destiny instead of leaving in the hands of others.  You need to exercise your right to own private property to do this.

I often wonder if those who try to attack this right realize that what they are doing allows people to basically take away all the others. If my life is not mine, if my liberty is only granted and can be taken away, if my pursuit of happiness requires that someone else give it to me, then they are not rights but privileges.  The right to property is what brings in this concept of ownership of not only my stuff but my rights.

To think otherwise is to have the mentality of the thief and the societal leach. I make no apologies for saying this.  I people have the notion that other people don’t have a right to property, then they are perfectly OK with the notion that such property can be taken away. They also have no problem when people have their property taken from hem through taxation so they can be supported.  In short they envision people can think and work but the results in part belong to them even though they have done nothing to earn them. This justifies their stealing it or letting others do it for them.

See the source image

So we turn again to abortion.  The seeming conflict is that the woman has her right to liberty and pursuit what will make her happy.  The notion being that the fetus is her body and she owns it so she can dispose of it as she sees fit. The opposite side of the coin is that the child has he right to live and pursuit its happiness by living. The real issue is it possible for one person to really own another and I would say that there is some inherent ownership of ones’ self in such a right to property.

For me the question of abortion has long been a sticky one.  As a Christian I had pretty clear guidelines, but it was still troubling at times.  Mostly because reality is that natural abortion happens all the time and with far more frequency than people think.  Most are never known to even exist.

Post-Christian, the issues now falls to whether the fetus is a person.  If not, the nit has no right to ownership of self and all the other rights that go with that.  If yes, then he/she does and they have those rights. I am not sure I can answer the question definitively at this point but I still maintain that liberty and life are important in equal measure.  I hope the choice is life, because I consider abortion a waste of human potential, if nothing else.

The real question for me is should the state be allowed to interfere?  Once again we are still left to determining when a person becomes a person and the answer seems clear. Given all our rights and the notion of self-ownership, if the fetus can be proven to be a person then the answer is yes, but if not we still find ourselves in a controversy.  It seems with all the advances in science, we should be able to determine this. Then the right to property with its concept of self-ownership kicks in.  This still doesn’t give us a clear answer but we have two more principles left so we shall see.

Closing Song: Amen – Halestorm:

Parting Thought:

Image may contain: text that says 'THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO GET UPSET ABOUT YOU SETTING BOUNDARIES ARE THE ONES WHO WERE BENEFITING FROM YOU HAVING NONE. POBYMAC#SPEAKLFE'

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – The Wayfarer’s Spiritual Side – Adaptation and Balance

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

The Wayfarer’s Spiritual Side.  This post and those titled like it to follow in the future are largely just me looking through the Eye, so to speak at my own spirituality. To gaze into my own spiritual journey and come up with some observations I hope will be helpful to me as I continue to walk my life.

I would say that the two great struggles I have had since leaving my religion and my ministry have firstly been to adapt to the change and secondly try to find some way to achieve balance spiritually speaking.

I suppose part of the problem is defining my spirituality:

  1. I want my spirituality to be my own journey of discovery. That is why religion and I have a problem.  That is, I see all of them as being someone else’s journey of discovery that other people follow.
  2. I want my spirituality to embrace all that I am in balance.  Reason, Emotion, Relationships, Health (Both mental and physical) and that aspect we call Spirit must all be involved equally. Most of my spirituality is about achieving balance between all these things.

Back to the two struggles, adaptation is a struggle because I am very conscious of the fact that I was engaged in a lot of spiritual activities as a Christian that I would consider irrational now.

  1. I went to church, but I now understand what that was.  It was the reinforcement of belief by repetition, not necessarily by coming to understanding the truth, but group think and emotional experience are powerful ways to teach you how to deny what is true.
  2. I prayed, but I have realized that I was probably talking to myself most of the time.  Even if there is a god, the way I was conceiving him as I prayed him took on the aspects of my earthly father.  it was my concept of god I was praying to, not necessarily the divine power that actually exists.
  3. I worshiped, but that conception of god was my own creation, so I was worshiping my own ability to conceive god. I don’t do a lot of this anymore.  I honestly can’t say I miss it much.
  4. I studied the Bible.  But this was about repeating something over and over again and when you do that you are just training your mind to think a certain way. Doesn’t mean that way is true or right.

In my adaptation, I don’t want spiritual practices that don’t also leave me open to see possibilities I may not have considered or get me to be dogmatically telling others what “The Truth” is at the expense of their own freedom to figure it out themselves.  it leaves very little other than practicing meditation on the virtues I want evident in my life and living life with a spiritual eye.

The other struggle is balance. Keeping one thing from dominating so much that the others are neglected.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

I have faith in myself. Like it or not it is all I really have. People say that might be a poor thing to have faith in and they may be right.  However, my self is all I really know I must have faith in, because it is the best thing I have to place my faith in that I know is real. Other things I will list that I have faith in I know based on my experience and reason that this is so, but I still must say I have a little less faith in these things than myself for obvious reasons. My wife, my small circle of friends, humanity all are worthy of various measures of my faith because they are real and proven through their actions.  That said at the end of the day the only one who can keep my spiritual life in balance is me.  The only one I can ultimately trust is me.

Religion:

I really try to avoid being religious, the problem is religion is very prevalent in spirituality, and eliminating it can be quite a challenge. The issue religion brings to the table is how much of other people’s spiritual experiences can be used to help my own and which ones are just controlling or fear mongering.  I find that if a spiritual notion leads me to being afraid or is trying to ‘force’ me to certain activities then it is a religious element to be rejected.  I just have time for notions that basically without proof try to tell me what ‘the truth’ is.  I think there may be many truths, but one single monolithic truth?  No.  I don’t think the universe is that small. If there is any force that can take me off my notion of balance it is religion.

Theology:

The most elementary shift in my thinking theologically speaking it is realizing that sin is a made up concept.  The writers of the Bible or any other holy book that talk about sin, just straight up called what behaviors they didn’t like ‘sin’.  Therefore, they took it upon themselves to speak for the divine as to what offends the divine. They offer no direct proof for this.  They claim it, but never prove it

Theologically speaking then, is humanity then inherently evil because they have picked up a sinful nature then?  No.  I have not proof one way or the other about that either. It is just asserted.  So when it comes to my spirituality it is not so much avoiding or overcoming sin anymore. My spirituality has shifted more to the notion of making myself better by strengthening what is positive or turning something negative into a positive. I don’t believe that part of my humanity needs to be destroyed or redeemed anymore.  I just think all elements of my humanity (needs, wants, reasoning, wisdom, etc.) need to be focused and work together to help me grow with balance.

Spirituality:

All of life then becomes just as much spiritual as it is anything else.  From taking a shower, to going to work, to making love to even me sitting right now and writing on this blog. All of it has the potential to strengthen me spiritually.  I simply have to find the element of each activity that helps me become a better person.  What is it that leads to long life, prosperity and balance.

Conclusion:

The issue I find is still the issue of balance and adapting to being an X=Christian.  Sometimes I find myself thinking about an issue and asking “Is that the former Christian talking or is it the real me?” It is the current state of my Spirituality as I walk the path of life. It is a question that comes up often.

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – Finding My Vocation

 

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day. 

Journal Entry:

Vocation:

  1. A strong feeling of suitability for a particular career or occupation
  2. A person’s employment or main occupation, especially regarded as particularly worthy and requiring great dedication.
  3. A trade or profession

You know it is funny when you look up the definition of a word and there are multiple definitions of a word and they all fit together and for a single concept that is true.  The word ‘vocation’ is such a  word for me right now.

For a long time my vocation was defined by a single word – ‘pastor’.  I left that behind me like and old worn out garment which can no longer be mended.  I threw it in the trash for a lot of reasons. Most notably that I no longer consider it an honorable profession myself.  I don’t speak of this often because I am not trying to be offensive; particularly for those people who are my friends in the ministry, but I made my living basically telling stories and giving people encouragement through belief in something that may not even be true. There is a lot of falsehood to it; to put it kindly.  The only real part of my job that  feel now might have been helpful was to coach people though some of their tough life decisions.  Life coach if you will.  You don’t need a religion to do that.

So now what?  Well, trying to take twenty years of people and organizational skills, a political science degree and my soon to be 50 year old self and have a new vocation that is 1) suitable for me, 2) becomes a new main occupation that people find worth of pursuit and 3) is my new profession. This is the goal.  It is the Business Virtues that guide me the most in this.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

Long term a vocation leads to the kind of self-reliance I am really looking for. The kind that allows me to look to the future with a basic knowledge that my wife and I will be OK as we grow older for many years to come.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

Something worthy of dedication and time spent doing it. I want something that actually accomplishes something real and tangible that people can see. To be respected again is probably the most noble part of Industriousness.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

The ultimate goal is a prosperity that my profession or trade gives me that I can share or use to help others. To build wealth and give. Something my old vocation never really gave me the opportunity to do.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I want something that has one other quality.  It allows me the opportunity to do the right thing and help others get though things in their life.  The life coach aspect of the ministry is probably the one thing I truly enjoyed over the years, I would like something that allows me to do that again in some form.  It’s why I lean toward Human Resources in Business.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading / Study – Half-hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  4. Clear In Box/ To Do List
  5. Financial Transaction Input
  6. Carb Count – zero.

Still struggling with this one. The truth be told as I look at the calendar, I need to revise my routines again when we hit March.  My birthday month has always been a good time to completely overhaul or revise things and this Routine along with many others will be going under revision.

Goals: 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of March 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

A lot of these goals have March deadlines.  They will be compelled so a few more goals will increase the number below.

Goals achieved since Summer 2018: 1

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

Eye on the prize of number six.   It remains there like a great golden crown.  Every day is a step towards it.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – The Book of Rabyd 1:3 – “Everyone Has the Right to Liberty”

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: ‘Bad Reputation’ – Joan Jett (Uncensored)

Is there an opening message here about liberty.  Yeah.  Liberty often requires that you don’t do things to please others, you do what is right for you and sometimes others are just being self-righteous, sanctimonious pricks.  The message today is about respect of others right to liberty, but sometimes it isn’t about that – it’s about trying to maintain your own liberty in the face of those who would take it away though cultural and political rules that they want to impose on you. Sometimes the fight for liberty is simply a matter of telling such rules and those who impose the to ‘go to hell’.

Poem: “Untitled Meme” by Unknown.
Image may contain: text that says 'Let the gays get married. Let the rednecks have their guns. Let the atheists be atheists. Let the Christians be Christians. America is about FREEDOM. Freedom to live your life as you please. So smoke a bowl, eat a greasy burger, shoot your guns, praise Jesus and wish those two fellas next door a happy honeymoon. It's only when people FORCE their ways on others that problems begin. It never ceases to amaze me how many full grown adults don' t understand that.'
Forcing your viewpoint on others is the issue. Not sure if this is a poem, but it definitely gets the point across.
Meditation:

Image may contain: text

Song of Preparation: “Imagine” – John Lennon

“They say I am a dreamer, but I am not the only one.”

Text: 

“Everyone has the Right to Liberty” – The Book of Rabyd 1:3

Sermon:

Liberty.  It is an easy word to say and it is easy to demand it for yourself.  It becomes quite another matter to give liberty to others.  The great problem with humans is that we objectify others and nearly all methods of objectification involve this notion that people should live a certain way, or do certain things and if they don’t then they just are wrong and we should make them.

I would submit the moment you are trying to use force, threat of force or fraud to make another person or group of people conform to your vision of morality, behavior or ethics you demonstrate you do not understand the word liberty. Liberty isn’t just about you being able to live the way you desire, it is about letting others do it too.

This is the thing about calling thing inalienable rights.  This means that if you want your right to something inalienable you have to respect it in others. The other thing is there is more than one inalienable right – you also have life and the pursuit of happiness.  No use of your liberty can deter then from another person’s rights to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

This has some pretty astounding implication which I will get into later in The book of Rabyd, but for now note that liberty allows you to do what you want to do as long as it does not interfere in the rights of others. That means you have to think a little bit about things before you act.  There is no just do what you want and damn the consequences. Liberty demands the notion of ‘love your neighbor as yourself’.

On the flip side though, if a person is going to tell me I am interfering with their rights, they better bring proof.  If they can’t do so, then they are simply attempting to diminish my right to choosing my own path which should be considered as just as evil a crime as trying to take my life.  People use all kinds of forces from philosophy, to religion to a straight up desire to control others to justify interfering with people’s liberty.  That notion cannot be allowed.

If there is any legacy I want to leave to my children and grandchildren at this point it is I hope they truly consider the blessings of liberty.  Not just for themselves but there is also a blessing in letting others be free.  From freeing oneself from the terrible desire to control the behavior of others.   If I were ever get around to creating a family motto, it will certainly have the Latin word: ‘Libertas‘ in it. It is that important; just as much the inalienable right as life.

Closing Song: ‘Whiskey in the Jar’ – Metallica

One final Skaal!!!

Parting Thought: 

Image may contain: one or more people

Amen, Mr. Hoppe, Amen

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and The Wayfarer – Part 6 – Replacing Memories with Memories

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

If you have been reading this last week an a half, you are very well aware that I am in the midst of what I what I would call a Grey Storm.  That is depression is overshadowing my life with dark clouds and a little rain. Mostly I just have been having a lot of problems feeling anything at all as I go through my day.

I mentioned that I felt this was triggered in my journal posts by some memories which were triggered in part by the time of year and by a dream.  The time of year is significant because last year at this time my organist at the church died.  He was a good friend and the last of my musicians with any real talent that I started with nine and half years previously.  Everyone I had started with in that regard was gone and I dubbed this time as the day the music died.  End of an era really for the church which really was completely true once I left.

I was really hurting and the only one who was listening to me at the time was a young woman who I ended up having an affair with.  I am not proud of this; and there are no good excuses for it, but there were reasons.  The starting point though was my organists death and reaching out at the time in friendship to her and her to me at this time last year.

The other trigger was a dream I had last Tuesday (Feb. 5th).  It was very vivid and real in its feeling.  I was walking down a downtown street. I had to find a bathroom and ducked into a restaurant.  I found the bathroom and went in a started to do my business.  While there heard someone enter the room.  They stopped behind me.  They stood there and I could feel their presence but they didn’t move. It was actually unnerving.  I finished and then turned around only to find it was the man from the church who I had considered a friend for well over nine years standing there. Now, I know he was no friend at all, and I would consider him a backstabbing liar and thief. He was smiling at me but it was a wicked smile.  He shook his head at me like a person who has judged you and has nothing but contempt.  I snorted and walked out. My general approach to any memory of this man is to basically say “Fuck you asshole” and try to push it from my mind.

As I was trying to leave the restaurant, there she was – the young lady in question sitting at the table by the door facing me.  She too was smiling.  Not in a judgmental way, just that same smile she always had when she saw me.  I couldn’t get out without going right next to her, and I couldn’t go back with the man behind me, so I went forward and sat down at the table to her left. Yes, the dream was so vivid I can remember details like this. She looked at me and the smile faded from her face as I sat down.  I tried to speak but discovered I couldn’t.  She smiled again and then sang a song.  The weird thing is, I can’t remember what it was.  I can remember everything else in great detail but the song and then she laughed.  I got up and ran out. I could feel both of them following me and then my alarm for work went off.  I was extremely thankful to be getting out of bed that morning, but the dream shook me.

Since then, I have been walking a Grey Storm. Normally dreams fade from my mind until in a week I can’t remember them, but not this one. It was so vivid and real, I just can’t shake it.  I find that the only thing that helps is thinking about other memories that are more pleasant.  Replacing memories with memories.

Today is February 15th.  That probably has the significance to many of you as the day after Valentine’s Day.  To me it has a little more meaning as 30 years ago this is the day  I proposed to my wife. I had chickened out the night before.  But then I knew that I wanted her in my life forever and I took a brave pill.  I asked her the next day in the front seat of my old 1979 LTD.  The rest is history.  It was a great day for me.  One right now that I hold close to my mind, so I can’t see or feel the others that are not so good.

Only time will tell if this technique of using good memories of the long past will help with the memories of the recent past. I am also hoping new memories of the future will help as well.  I need some wins and some success.  I just hate times like this where everything is in autopilot and I am just walking without feeling. My heart and soul going into shutdown mode and staying numb, so I don’t feel pain. At least for now, the good memories of the past pull me out of the numb for a bit.

I suspect there will be more The Grey and The Wayfarer posts.  They will probably increase in frequency from now until the end of summer.  Mostly, I hope to remember some good things to keep out the bad, but I know me.  This is going to be a love/hate year when it comes to memories. and so The Grey will be ever present, like it or not.

Walking the Grey,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

Odin’s Eye – Religion Problems – Relics (St. Valentine’s Day Post)

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

I am going a little out of order here and the original design of “Religion Problems” was to hit other religions besides Christianity. But it is St. Valentines Day, so I am drawn to the holiday because of what we do with it.  But in the area of religion, the subject of relics is an interesting one.

Even as a Christian I wrote about St. Valentines Day as being something of a weird holiday when you look at it rationally. I wrote a post on it back in 2013:

St. Valentine’s Day – Maybe I Should Get a Tattoo

From that post I quoted Wikipedia:

The most popular martyrology associated with Saint Valentine was that he was imprisoned for performing weddings for soldiers who were forbidden to marry and for ministering to Christians, who were persecuted under the Roman Empire; during his imprisonment, he is said to have healed the daughter of his jailer Asterius. Legend states that before his execution he wrote “from your Valentine” as a farewell to her.

The other thing is his relic:  A skull (said to be his)  with flowers that bloom from it.  I mean according to the church no one just puts these flowers on the relic, they just appear. The idea that this regular miracle builds faith in the Saints and in the faith they served is a pretty common theme in the use of such relics regardless of religion.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

So the question of miracles comes up with relics. I mean the blooming flowers thing would be impressive, if it is true.  But notice something right away in the picture of this relic.  It is carefully preserved in a box and that box probably has a back door.  I wonder what that would be for? It would be too simple have someone reach in when no one is watching a replace the flowers from time to time. Having grown up in the Pentecostal church I have seen the height of sleight of hand to get people to believe and to me the most rational explanation for blooming flowers is not a miracle, but placement when people are looking the other way.  That is very easy for any illusionist. I saw people doing this all the time to ‘prime the pump’ of faith.  Sorry, this is a ‘miracle’ that may not be so miraculous.

Religion:

I also find it interesting that this use of relics is even present in the three major monotheistic religions. All of them have as a base the commandment about idolatry and no matter how you shake and dance, veneration of an object is idolatry.  In the case of relics,  this idea of a spiritual force infecting an object, is definitely on the idolatry side is given a pass. because it ‘builds faith’.

Theology:

Miracles in general are often attached to things in my opinion that really are not a miracle. The idea of genuine miracles being possible I do not dismiss, I just also have a very specific theological definition of miracle that is basically an act of the divine that does something both unusual and unnatural. Babies being born, beautiful sunsets, etc. are not miracles by that definition.  To prove such a thing would require actual rational observation. When you do this with most relics, you find the sleight of hand and illusion aspects every time.

Spirituality:

I guess from a personal spiritual point of view, I don’t really have a need to have relics prove faith or theology.  I engage both with my spiritual side but it is much more internal for me as a pagan.  Relics and ritual have always be a bugaboo for me because, I can see that they can be easily turned into something where people are psychologically manipulated. It can have absolutely nothing to do with real spiritual or divine power. Relics are a good example of that kind of manipulation, if you ask me.

Conclusion:

On a lighter note, I prefer the modern version of Valentine’s Day.  A day devoted to expressing love toward your significant other. A day where you remind each other how much you love each other.  In that respect I can give a nod to the holiday. But relics – no. Just no.

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens – Hospitality: Home Presence

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

As a virtue hospitality is something I have a grasp on intellectually.  It’s pretty simple to be ready to be helpful in any way possible and opening up your home to strangers in need is something you can provide is not hard to understand. It is one basic way of expressing it, but expression of hospitality is a little deeper than that. I like the quote about better where people feel at home in your presence. Because it is the kind of hospitality that can always be expressed.  You can always be hospitable by choice to anyone who simply needs to be in the presence of someone who makes them feel comfortable in a bad situation. At the very least learning not to be a dick is probably a positive thing to do.

In Christianity I spent a lot of time pondering the notion of – ‘love you neighbor as yourself’.  Jesus is pretty clear on the fact that even one’s supposed enemies or even people we find disgusting are one’s neighbors.  I get it; but more pragmatically, hospitality is simply being human to another human.  To see them not as objects but as they are – as people.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

Hospitality has a certain level of need on both sides. 1) People are going to face things beyond their control and sometimes those things are devastating to life.  People need help sometimes and to reach out a hand and help them in those times can fill a great need.  2) You need to be hospitable for yourself.  I mean if your going to prove that your decent human being and treat others as humans.  Your human side needs this, so you don’t start feeling you have gone completely over to the dark side.

Wants (Freki):

We want hospitality and to be hospitable. Those moments are something we cherish when we led a hand or someone lends a hand to us. Less positive is when someone kicks us when we are down or takes advantage of our distress or bad decisions. We also want hospitality on both side for ourselves and others.

Reason (Huginn):

Rationally, hospitality is the heart of humanism.  It is about the notion that the solution to human problems is humanity.  We show great humanity in hospitality.  It is also actually acting rather than some other activity where we put on airs that we are helping but it reality we are doing nothing.  Prayer comes to mind. I know other people think prayer is doing something, but I used to see it as a most convenient excuse to not actually help someone and instead ‘pray for them’ for which they should thank you. Even though you didn’t do anything to actually help their situation.  The irony was there are many verses of The Bible that caution against this; but we would run to the ones on prayer to say we were still doing something.

Wisdom (Muninn):

Wisdom says that hospitality is what make the world a better place.  Not government, not laws, not better ideas.  Simply being a free human, freely helping our fellow humans. So that people feel at home when we are around knowing that the benefits and comforts of home are there with us; regardless of how far they are away from their actual home.

Conclusion:

For myself the biggest switch has been to dump the whole “I will pray for you” excuse and try to find something I can actually do.  It is hard to say to people: “Sorry, I can’t help you”, but it is more honest. When I can help, I act to do so.  When I can find someone who can help when I can’t is also a possibility. The one thing I never want to do anymore is create some activity that I claim is helping, but isn’t really doing anything. If I am going to justly toward others; with justice, part of that is making sure I am actually acting on the problem, not just ignoring it.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Pagan Pulpit – The Book of Rabyd 1:1 -“If There is a Divine Center to the Universe, It is NOT You.”

 

Happy Sun’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods and goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves, and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not giving to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never see a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Opening Song: “Walk” Pantera Cover by Breaking Benjamin with Disturbed’s David Draiman as lead singer. 

Another unique moment in time when you have members of two bands do a cover of another band.  The real problem with music fans is that they tend to be so competitive and in truth musicians might have their rivalries, but they do get along better probably than the fans.  Metal fans can be the worst.  For me if it sounds good I will listen to it. And what sounds good really is a matter of pure opinion. I like this one.

Poem: “I am a Wolf” by Unknown

Image may contain: text

Meditation:

Image may contain: one or more people, text that says '"Fear is not real. Fear is simply the product of thoughts that you create. Danger is very real, but fear is choice."'

Song of Preparation: Humility – Carl Sagan:

Not a song, but a cold dose of reality, as we look at the first verse of the Book of Rabid.

Text: 

“If There is a Divine Center to the Universe, It is NOT You.” – The Book of Rabyd 1:1

Sermon:

I of course ran into my first problem with The Book of Rabyd rewrite right out the gate with verses one and two of the old version: ‘There is a God’ and ‘You are Not God’.  The first verse I would consider a little dogmatic now. The second really is a result of understanding one simple truth; that you are not the center of the universe.  After much debate with myself I came up with: “If There is a Divine Center to the Universe, It is NOT You”to replace them both.

The first part of verse one is a propositional phrase.  The idea is possibility without being sure of it to the point of arrogance. I think there are two dangers I am confronting with this phrase. 1) That given the vastness of the universe it is highly likely that any notion of the divine that any religion creates; if it exists, is probably wrong in some way and 2) To dismiss the notion of the divine altogether is also equally arrogant given the vastness of the universe and how little we know about it.

The second phrase is one of humility.  The real kind, not the fake kind of humility that religion produces, which I find to be attention seeking. “Look how humble I am and how much faith I have.”  Or the kind that life knocking you down achieves, which is actually a low sense of personal honor.  No, real humility is the basis for all the virtues of life Humility leads to love, justice and wisdom because one can acknowledge that you are but one being in a vast universe. But also there are other beings trying to do the best they can on this same planet with you.  Real humility leads to respect of self and others which is the foundation of all the rest.

All the virtues, no matter what you name them, should flow from this humble understanding of self and respect for both yourself and others. For me the Nine Noble Virtues are my way of expression of this, but each person could choose their own. It is where; despite the fact that I am not the center of the universe, I will act with my better and stronger self.

This change of course leads to questions about what legacy I want to pass on here. One simple one really – You don’t have to be the center of the universe to have a great life and great relationships.  Just genuine humility about yourself and respect for others.  This should lead to a Honor, Liberty and Solid Relationships.  Real humility has those results.

Closing Song: George Thorogood – One Bourbon, One Scotch and One Beer (Live) 1984:

One last Skaal before we go.  Blues. It’s always good. Enjoy Your Week.

Parting Thought:

No photo description available.

Given the vastness of our universe and our humility as we stand before it, we really have one choice before us – to make our own way as best we can and respect that others are doing the same.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – Skill in Battle

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Journal Entry:

When it comes to being ready for the battles of life and developing the skills I need as warrior of life, it is the Self Virtues that do this most. Discipline has obvious implications but there is also the perseverance and fidelity virtues that teach me that continuing to  strengthen my resolve and relationships leads to being a stronger and more skillful warrior of life as well.

These also are the ones that help with The Grey the most.  This had been a bad week as far as how I personally feel, probably triggered by some bad memories and a bad dream I had Tuesday night.  No, I don’t feel sad.  That’s not what depression does for me.  It just makes me feel numb.  I found this on the internet this week that describes it perfectly.

Image may contain: text that says 'People think depression is sadness. People think depression is crying. People think depression is dressing in black. But people are wrong. Depression is the constant feeling of being numb. Being numb to emotions, being numb to life. You wake up in the morning just to g0 back to bed again. HealthyPlace.com'

It is this feeling that is The Grey. But I am the Grey Wayfarer – I keep up the Discipline of walking through it. I Persevere and I close ranks with my Circle in Fidelity.  It is the only ways I have found to combat The Grey and numbness that goes with it.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

I do struggle with the discipline of life when I get like this.  The temptation is to just stop and exist.  But I keep getting up and doing my routines and sticking to my plan because eventually it is the thing that gets me out of it. It is the thing that develop’s the skills I need to fight it.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Keep walking.  I guess I can say about this week when it comes to Perseverance. I keep walking.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Close ranks, stay loyal to family and philosophy and keep moving.  These are the strengths of fidelity in The Grey.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom: 

Keeping Balance in times like these is difficult.  Love is hard because you feel nothing and Justice is hard because you are self-absorbed in times like this.  Wisdom however at items has fertile ground in these times of depression for me. You have to be careful and keep it in context becasue as I have said before The Grey makes it hard to see clearly at times, but it is the coming out of the grey clouds of depression, that usually I have a moment of insight.  A minor epiphany does happen and things get better. Balance returns and wisdom grows.

Weekly Routine: 

  1. Weightlifting – 4 days per week.
  2. Cleaning – 3 days a week.
  3. Walking – 4 days a week
  4. Writing – 4 times a week
  5. Cheat Meal Count – Currently 1

The dropping of the cheat meal to one has really been a challenge here. I do however think I have a plan for weightlifting as I may simply purchase a few dumbbells to at least keep my muscles toned at home, until some final decisions regarding a gym can be made. This might also be helpful in times when life gets busy.

Evening Routine:

  1. Take supplements and medications.
  2. Brush and Floss Teeth
  3. Out the Door Preparation
  4. Reading – 15 min.
  5. Go to Bed

Still a challenge, I need to simply get in my head that supper time is the trigger to working through it and I will be OK I think.

Nutrition:

This time of special nutrition has been in many ways a really good thing.  I haven’t been able to lift or walk and so it is keeping me from blowing up like a balloon.  Of course there is the thing of the stress level in my life being lower because I no longer carry the burdens of a lot of other people now that I am out of the ministry. That has had a good effect on my health as well.

Weekly Recap:

Foundational – The Foundational Virtues have been good this week.  Courage is more than a warriors virtue, it is a life virtue and having the courage this week to just get up and function has been the difference maker.

Business – I focus on what needs to be done here.  I need an overall career plan at this point and then I need to start executing it.

Self – I can’t tell you how many times the Discipline of the Routines and just my dogged determinism to not quit kept me going this week. I am glad I established these things because it is they that help me the most when depression hits.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!