Goals

Wayfarer’s Journal Post – June 26, 2025

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Saturn’s Day!

I have gone around and around about how to handle these journal posts. I don’t want to just drop them every other day like last time, as it was a constant justification to just change my plans every time I did a journal post. At the same time, they were a constant reminder of the plan I had and what I needed to do with my life, and they motivated me to do some things even if I never got to all of them. They are both a blessing and a curse.

I have also changed a lot as far as my objectives for my life. I want to be successful in the things that I now want to do, but those things have changed. Some at least. I suppose I should lay down what my goals are at present and then see what habits I need to start based on them. Fully aware that my strength lies in making plans, not necessarily executing them.

The initial problem for me is: what to work on? As an autistic and ambitious person, I tend to make a list of too many things to do. I overdo it and have to dial it back. It has been an interesting to simply ask the question: Is this doable? It changes a lot of how I approach my routines that I need to function and get things done.

Back to the question of the journal posts, I think once a week on a Saturn’s Day is probably best. It caps each week and allows for reflection, but doesn’t allow alteration at the drop of a hat.

But what am I trying to be? I was recently reminded of a simple way of setting a life goal that was presented to me by a YouTuber https://www.youtube.com/@ArminNavabi. Simply put, what is your life purpose, and then create things to that actually help reach that life goal.

What then is my life goal? When I am lying on my deathbed, what did I accomplish? How am I remembered? Hmm, perhaps this is the next question for the next journal post. So until next Saturn’s Day.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

Pause, Reset, Re-Align, Restore

/ Ed Raby Sr / 2 Comments

Happy Freya’s Day!

My struggles have always been easier when I have routine and discipline. The problem is that my hypersensitivity can rob me of that when my nervous system gets overloaded and then depression and anxiety can set in.

For the last month, I have realized that the best time for me to establish routine and discipline is fall through spring. Summer is my challenge with all the sensory input. It really makes me turn into a vampire of sorts that avoids the light and heat whenever I can. Cold is actually very comforting to me in moderation. Too cold? Well, I am approaching 55 years of age so my joins feel that. I wish it could be Fall all the time.

So, time to pause things and hit the reset button. Tome to establish routines, so when summer returns, things move to an automatic level and don’t stress my nervous system out as much. So let’s take a basic look:

Main Routine:

  1. Get up and Make my bed.
  2. Full body Stretch (Shower on days off)
  3. Email Check / Personal Business
  4. Read 1 chapter of a book
  5. Write: 1000 words in my rotation.
  6. Youtube Video – 1 a day.
  7. Prepare for work the next day or if not working relax.

Before Work: – Workout/Shower

Discipline: Diet – Carnivore or Paleo – haven’t decided.

Time to reset this all and re-align it so that it makes me more productive. Time to restore a little bit more of myself.

My Goals are not a long list anymore:

  1. Become a successful Youtuber
  2. Become a published author
  3. Be as fit and healthy as I can be.
  4. Fall in Love again.
  5. Peace of Mind.
  6. Retire to a cabin in the woods as a Philosopher.

I crave a simple and Stoic life these days, full of love and peace.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

Overreaching, Autism, and Essentialism

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Odin’s Day!

I now know Why I struggle with goals so much. In short, I set way too many and then I fail at all but a few. I overreach a lot. Take this blog for instance. There was a time when I would post pretty much every day. It was one of my goals, but I had many others at the time, and they suffered. So I switched goals and tried to keep the goal of posting regularly up, and then it fell off. I am a bad juggler when it comes to goals.

For a long time, I struggled with the cause of this overreaching. I now think autistic traits that I have in my thinking explain a lot of it. I see and plan much and execute little. Practical time management and habits are my two difficulties because routine is so needed for me and at the same time, so hard to change. I can also point to the motivation to do things being so influenced now by hypersensitivity. When my senses are overloaded, the Grey (depression for new readers) is high.

What overloads them. Bright Light – now I know why I like cloudy days. Warm Tempature – why I was twice as depressed in Texas as in Michigan. Strong smells – My nose is very rarely not plugged to prevent my feeling miserable. Lack of Touch – My touch sense is actually more of a positive for me and well without a woman in my life, that is down to nil and it shows in how I feel. In short, when all of these get too much – The Grey is sure to follow.

Depression tends to kick the shit out of my goals. Only established habits survive for me and I can only realistically get those established when I am not depressed and/ or not being overwhelmed by hypersensitivity.

Essentialism is a good help. It reminds me to take that long list of goals, trim it down, and then turn the day-to-day into habits. The best time for me to get these established is probably now.

This blog is still my favorite child. I hope to write more regularly soon, but I have some stuff to sort out better. Thanks to all of you over the years who have stuck with me. I think writing is the most therapeutic thing I do and you are a part of that. Hopefully, things will get better soon.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

The Grey Wayfarer is Going Creative

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sol’s Day!

Sorry, I have been away for so long but I have been trying to get my apartment to where I want it and decide what to do with the Grey Wayfarer blog here. In the end, I can do a paper journal to keep track of my personal life with routines and all that. I need to get back into the practice of creative writing both as an exploring some possibilities and it is good therapy for me. So I am shifting this blog to a more creative route. So what will I be writing?

  1. I received the Solo Adventure’s Toolbox books 1 and 2 in the mail so I am learning the system so my series based on my solo adventures in Dungeons and Dragons will be starting very soon. I need to bone up on my 5th edition a little and do some initial world creation. After that, the system’s randomness will challenge me to push my creativity in directions I have not thought of before. Hopefully.
  2. I started another serial that is urban fantasy. I actually have written part of part 1. This one will be interesting as it focuses on one character, Norse mythology, and magic in our modern world.
  3. I am thinking about science fiction. I love science fiction but of all the genres, it would require me to research the most. I like my science fiction to be as close to real as possible. Perhaps short stories are best here.
  4. I am also going to try my hand at short stories, poems, and other creative projects. Note: no genre of writing is exempt from my hand which is why this blog will remain rated R and at times higher. I like dealing with real subjects in my writing.

I guess what we could say is that the Grey Wayfarer represents a journey of sorts. It will be my journey personally as I learn and grow and experiment with my writing. Part of who I am and what I am going through has always been expressed in my writing. Artists reveal a little about themselves with their art and I m no exception.

Will I still drop the personal post at times? Yep as I learn and grow, I will reflect on that from time to time. But my focus needs to be getting a better work situation, my YouTube Channel – which will launch in March – and getting back to writing. The goal is to retire to a cabin in the woods and become a philosopher and get paid for it until I hit the Long Dark. A very simple focus but requires me to think very differently about how to achieve it.

Thanks to everyone for following along this far as I struggle with recent changes in my life. The apartment thing is real for me if I am not comfortable in my environment I don’t do life well. The downside concerning this blog has been to not be writing. But I am feeling more comfortable now so the routines and writing should pick up bit by bit as I feel more creative due to being more relaxed.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

The Gym Life (Short Post)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day!

One of my goals yesterday was to set up a training regimen and in the end, I decided against it. The fact is that I now go to the gym, and think to myself – what haven’t I done in a while? This becomes the target and it also helps with the fact that it can be hard to always get the equipment you want with other people. So this sale that problem and I can either jump ahead or work on something I feel needs to be worked on more intensely. I have come a long way from needing every set and rep planned out like in the past. So, I guess the main thing is to show up and do some work.

To-Do List 1-30-23:

  1. I need to write a workout plan for a five-day rotation. I hope it gets warmer by March – walking. (repeat) – no plan but an overview of the process – this works better for now.
  2. Need to move forward with the apartment as much as possible – this goal is contingent on others’ actions so it might be her a while. – troubling – I have sent some emails but no response.

To-Do List: 1-31-23

  1. Keep checking on the apartment
  2. World Building for my fantasy serial. I can do this at work.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

Trying New Things or Die

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day!

Morgan Freeman is one of my favorite people to listen to and quote at times. This idea of keeping learning new things or dying is very interesting. The idea of course is there is a great deal of difference between living your life and existing until you are dead. Living involves learning new things and pushing the next horizon – or does it.

I have been listening to a lot of Stoic philosophy and there is a lot of wisdom in being content in the moment. Of not striving for things that you cannot control. This notion of dealing with what you can control and what you cannot is ultimately left to contentment or even passiveness is a Stoic trait and one that is very helpful to me. It keeps me from worrying so much and much more focused on what needs to be done.

That said there are goals that need to be set each day. This is about controlling what I can control and what I need to control and the goals need to reflect that. I still desire to learn, so it’s not time to die yet.

To-Do List: 1-29-23:

  1. Go back to bed at 8am ( I am writing this at 5am) – this is the final effort to get some sleep at the right time. I did manage to shift my sleep pattern mostly. So goal achieved
  2. I need to write a workout plan for a five-day rotation. I really hope it gets warmer by March – I need to start walking again. – I literally forgot this one, but I did go to the gym. My employer has a long hour-long lunch so there are really no excuses for this one.

To-Do List 1-30-23:

  1. I need to write a workout plan for a five-day rotation. I really hope it gets warmer by March (repeat)
  2. Need to move forward with the apartment as much as possible – this goal is contingent on others’ actions so it might be her a while.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

I Am A Northman

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Freya’s Day!

I know we are a long way from snow and ice season here in Michigan. I also know the movie Northman has been recently released and No, I haven’t seen it. But this really isn’t about either of these things but more of a personal reflection. I have done a lot of literal walking the last couple of weeks on the trails close to my current place of residence recently and this has given me a lot of time to think.

The more time I spend here in my home state, the more I realize this is my true home and always will be. I just don’t feel as close to myself down in Houston as I do here. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate Texas, it’s just I have never been a cowboy type. I am more of Woods, Hills, and Snow type cut right from the medieval world. I want my cabin in the woods, not an apartment in a big city.

That’s why the more time I spend at home, the more I my plan to spend one more year in Texas, finish my training, mentorship, get one more year of experience, and then transfer home. Here to my home state – Northern Michigan. I am a Northman.

This next year feels more like an upcoming raid. True Northman Viking Style.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

Routine Adjustments and Forming Habits

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sol’s Day!

So what is the vision for myself I am trying to base my goals and thus what habits do I need to form on daily basis to achieve them? So we start with my vision of what I would like to see myself be. This has a few new elements seeing I am now single and working toward better things for me without consideration for a significant other. This has its own challenges because I am doing it with one income and without someone to run it through as a filter. I do consider that last part to be a bit of a weakness of being single.

My vision for myself has some specifics in that I value strength, masculinity, rationality, virtue, and quality of relationships over quantity. I also believe these work together and fortify each other. Thus the reason I used the quote from Henry Rollins for this post. One strength leads to another. So what habits do I need to achieve this?

The problem with this for me right now is that I recognize this as a process. Because of this habits may need to be added once I recognize the need for them, and others might need to be dropped. This is an evolving list and one that is going to change with time and further consideration. Thus the Daily Routine. Each item is designed to bring me day by day to some part of the vision. It’s interesting that this almost eliminates the idea of goals, now that I think of it, other than the goal is to create habits that create the vision of what I want to be.

The Grey Wayfarer’s Daily Routine (as of 5-15-22)

  1. Get up and Make the Bed: Goes to Mental Health. I can say at any time of the day I have made my bed. It’s also nice at the end of the day to climb into a made bed, even though the other side is empty right now. I miss cuddling the most. I usually get up 3am.
  2. Meditation on the Nine Noble Virtues: Goes to Virtue. Basically, I read through them three times out loud. This is my way of coming to a better understanding of the virtues and thinking about how to apply them.
  3. Full Body Stretch: Goes to Strength of Body and Masculinity. I also put on my headphones at this point to listen to Viking Wisdom and Warrior Wisdom.
  4. Weight Training: Goes to Strength and Masculinity. I am still usually listening to Wisdom and Motivational stuff on my headphones. This is Monday through Saturday Only.
  5. Breakfast and Supplements: Goes Strength and Masculinity. My Diet is Cave Man (Paleo).
  6. Shit, Shower and Shave: Physical Health: Part of the Viking Wisdom I listen to is the expression about not worrying about the simplicity of Dress but rather worrying about health and Hygiene. Being clean and hygienic of body is more important than what you wear on that body.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day: Mental Health: This is the first mental acknowledgment that I am going to have to go outdoors so I need to prepare. It should be noted that 1 through 6 are done in the nude. I sleep naked as it leads to a more restful night of sleep for me. When I get up I fail to see the point of getting dressed to just take it off again to take a shower. I am comfortable in my own skin and tend to be an at-home nudist anyway. I have also found this leads to a good mental state of “This is me in the raw, what I am stripped down – what am I capable of like this?”
  8. Get ready for work: This is Monday through Friday only. It leads to financial health but there is a mental shift going on as well. I have a separate work routine. I will probably go over that at some point.
  9. Record YouTube Video for The Rabyd Atheist. Edit and Post. Goes to being socially strong. Having a voice in the world. I used to do this later but a practical concern caused me to change it to earlier. That concern is that after school the kids in my apartment complex play loudly. So Yesterday I made the decision to record as soon as I am ready for work. Even if I have to go to work right after I record I can pick this up later. Usually, I have plenty of time, as my routine (the more I get used to it) goes faster and takes less time.
  10. Write Post for The Grey Wayfarer: Goes to Mental Health and Social. I also have a vision of myself as being a philosopher writing out his wisdom at the end of his life. I am the guy who played LIFE the board game and wondered why retiring and becoming a philosopher was a bad outcome.
  11. Study: 30 mInutes: Right now this comes before reading because I am trying to finish my training for my teacher certification and working on it for a half-hour a day seems reasonable
  12. Reading – 3 chapters. God for me as the scholar and it starts to mark me coming down from the day. I find reading both engaging and relaxing. Mental Health here as well.
  13. Cleaning: 30 mInutes. This is more of a mental thing as well. This is also more of the spot cleaning of a room or rooms as on Sunday I have a full reset cleaning I do. Keeping my environment clean and in line with my tastes goes a long way toward fighting my depression.
  14. Personal Business: Mail, email, paying bills. I am probably going to morph this into planning and budgeting as I have a financial goal of getting debt-free as soon as possible.
  15. End the day: Take off my clothes and climb into bed. My alarms are all set through Alexa so. Sleep and reset.

Over time this should start to shape me in a lot of ways into a strong person of mind, body, and social responsibility. The only thing I am trying to add is a routine about staying connected to my family but in many ways that are in their hands as all my kids are welcome to interrupt my routine to talk to me. One of the perks of being my children. They are far busier than me so they all have permission to interrupt my life to talk to me.

I suspect that some of this will be changed over time and added to and subtracted from. There are two other routines in my life – Work and Sunday Rest. More on those next weekend.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

The Grey and the Wayfarer – Time to Take a Walk

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day!!!

I have been away for a while and I can’t say that after looking at my excuses for not writing that they are good ones. I will only say that I have been keeping my life on the grindstone and The Grey is a motherfucker. This issue is that a lot of major changes were taking place and; to be blunt, my muse was running out of steam, and I didn’t have a new one.

The Changes in my life were that I pretty much started proclaiming that I am an atheist (a pagan one as far as ethics) but also after 32 years my wife and I decided to part ways. I am not going to go too much into it, but the result was me putting all my worldly possessions in my Jeep Patriot and riding away on July 30 to Texas to take a teaching job in a Houston Area high school teaching social studies. I have actually found a good replacement for what I lost as a pastor, but also I can now at the end of the day leave work at work and start enjoying life. My only real battles are usually homesickness, loneliness, and depression (The Grey).

My Muse for a long time was the grief of lost love over those people who have read this blog known as Miss Salty. It’s not so much that I don’t look at my heart in that pot and don’t find a scar and a little pain. Time heals but it doesn’t heal everything. That said, the fuel that grief gave me for my writing seems to have dried up. It always seems that I need the feminine to write and I’ve struggled to know what to write about.

A little while ago though I realized that one of my coping mechanisms against The Grey is writing. I don’t; cope well when my feelings are not being written down and No matter how I try to a journal offline, it doesn’t work. It’s the notion of public consumption that makes it feel like sharing with someone else. That’s the motivation.

I don’t know what the future holds other than I have made the commitment to start writing every day again. It might be a journal entry like this one, a short story, or a poem or something. The main thing is to write and thus start taking a walk again into my feelings and thoughts. I am also going to keep these short, so that’s all for today.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

“Circle Routine Focused on Progress” – The Rabyd Skald

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sol’s Day!!!

The real problem is now how to take four simple goals and make daily progress on the whole thing.  This has in the past always come down to routine. In his case through the idea is to do the routine with reward at regular steps so it is a little different.  No workday or rest day routine here.  The only difference between a workday and a off day will be that I should accomplish more on my off days simply because I have more time. 

The way it works is cyclical working though the routine and then starting over when it is completed.  What keeps it moving is the time or more concrete goal for each step when it is done to move on to the next thing. My priority starts with health, then career, then writing, then my YouTube channel, the rinse and repeat.

  1. Full Body Stretch / Meditation – Max – once per day.
  2. Walking – 30 minutes – conditional good weather, trails are clear. Max once per day.
  3. Relaxing – 1 hour.
  4. Certification Work – 3 hours.
  5. Relaxing – 1 hour.
  6. Blog Article – write, edit, post – Max four times a week. Posting will be spread out across the week but I will probably write a post on that very soon.
  7. Read 1 chapter of a book.
  8. Write 1000 words.
  9. Relaxing – 1 hour
  10. YouTube Skills development – 2 hours.
  11. Relaxing – 1 hour.
  12. Personal Business – empty inboxs.

There are a couple things that will interrupt this routine because they are conditional to the situation. The routine goes to pause and after they get done, it starts back up again.

  1. Weightlifting – after work when I know I have time to do it and get home in time enough to hand the car off to the wife.
  2. YouTube recording – three times a week but I need no one to be home but me.
  3. Work – when I am at work the routine goes to pause mode.

The routine stops when I go to bed and starts where it left off when I get up. 

A note on nutrition. This is an all day every day issue so doesn’t fit in a routine.

Life intrudes (appointments, life events) with things that will pause this as well. The main thing is to get back at it as soon as possible.

Relaxing time can be banked.  That is saved for later.  I doubt this will happen much, but if I a making progress and enjoying that, I might skip a relax time and save it for later to be taken when I want.

I am coming up on my 52nd birthday. March traditionally has been a good start for me because of it.  Last year I was off to a great start and then COVID killed a lot of things for me.  Not this year.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!