Motivation

“Caveman Lifestyle” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

All of my goals that remain under Self Virtues are about diet and exercise. The diet being caveman Paleo and my exercise practical involving stretching, weightlifting, and hiking. In many cases, I am modeling on what life might have been for us as we evolved out of the early days into now.  Walking with loads on our back, moving obstacles with strength and stretching the joints and tendons to the limit. All while, eating a diet based on hunting and gathering.   It works for me.

It might also be said that other caveman activities are present – notably being entertained by stories and sex while maintaining nudism when I can. A lifestyle inspired by ancestors. Given my weight loss, increased strength and endurance plus of the health factors that have improved – I would say it has worked very well.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

To be full paleo diet means from January to March I need to be full time on it.  No cheats and no exceptions. This is going to require some serious look at paleo recipes and some serious introduction of self-control.  I am game. But after the holidays.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

I want to introduce a treadmill walk to my workout after lifting and i want to also have that have either a weighted vest or a backpack with weight.  I need to train because when the snow melts off the ground I have some hiking to do and I want to be ready. Lifting and stretching are good right now,  Just want to be more consistent.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s moral philosophy, to one’s family, one’s friends, and most important to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends is valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

Goal achieved.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

The wisdom as always is establishing lifestyle change, not a 12-week plan.  The latter leads to the up and downhill rollercoaster of being fit and fat.  Nope.  Needs to be out the gate full on and long term. That’s wisdom.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  5. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  6. Writing – 3000 Words

I need to work on this one the most.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 5

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  5. By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Self Reliance, Atheism, and Asatru” – Of Wolves and Ravens – Self-Reliance

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Discussion:

I recently changed the virtue of self-reliance’s definition, so it bears repeating:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved when each person is their own master and no one else’s’ .”

When it comes to atheism and the concept of self-reliance, there is a lot overlap here as the one thing one discards as an atheist is a dependence on the divine of any type.  There is no praying for rescue, no religion, no faith that can save you are help you.  The world is a harsh place sometimes and a lot fo the times we are on our own to face it,  Facing that reality is both terrifying and liberating.  Self-reliance is like that because you often wonder if you have what it takes to make it through each situation.

The flip side so self-reliance is the independence of it which is not only liberating but beneficial.  Once you have taken responsibility, then you get to make your own decisions at the end which have a higher likelihood of being beneficial to your situation than ones made by others.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Image result for heinlein quotes responsibility

Needs (Geri):

People do not grow as people without taking responsibility for themselves.  this is a value shared by atheists and followers of Asatru. Otherwise, a person stagnates in their personal development and does not grow because they have become dependent on others.  People need to take responsibility for their life for growth to take place.

Wants (Freki):

We want this as well. Self-reliance leads to reward.  We not only have a better chance of getting what we want but in the end, we build our pride. Something that allows us to walk the world without shame and with a great deal of honor. These are things everyone should desire.

Reason (Huginn):

The rational point of view that leads to self-reliance is summed up in the statement – ‘no gods, no masters.”.  To be free and independent, to enjoy the blessings of liberty, one must be rational and rationally self-reliant.  You simply do not get liberty by being reliant on others to the point of dependence. From a rational point of view, it is unhealthy because to be in any relationship to become overly dependent or dependent against ones will is to be a slave.

Wisdom (Muninn):

The wisdom is this, relationships need to be based on a lack of dominance to be good ones. Once one has assumed the role of master, liberty is gone.  It is the desire to not be someone slave or in return not to be anyone’s master that leads to self-reliance. You are not just a champion for your own self-reliance, but for the self-reliance of others. This is the wise path to liberty.

Conclusion:

I find that one of the dearest virtues of my heart is self-reliance.  It keeps me getting up in the morning and hustling for what I want. It is the spirit of independence and the essence of why I take responsibility for myself and my actions.  No gods, no masters – self-reliant.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Rebel Self” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

Here at the end of the week of consideration of my bucket list items, I have to note that this part fo the list is very much more of my rebel side.  This is despite the fact that the virtues involved are Discipline, Perseverance, and Loyalty.  The issue is that part of the fruit of all these is freedom.

The rebellious act on my bucket list plainly states this and the tattoo is more of a subtle issue, but not overly so. The discovery of origins and visiting those countries just fits the wanderer that is The Grey Wayfarer.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

My main goal is that next year I will be celebrating Beltane in my own way. My life of discipline giving way to a less disciplined moment in time where I do something purely for me that is not a ‘so-called’ socially acceptable thing to do.  A rebellious action against society but something that makes me happy.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

The tattoo will probably also accomplish one of my five remaining goals before the end of March. Either my first check of a new job will help me do this or I will be using part of my tax return to do it. Either way, the rebel within will be expressed on my skin.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

This probably the most long term goal I have on my bucket list.  It reflects finding roots and getting truly acquainted with my past. I wouldn’t be surprised if I found a few rebels in it.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

Being wise in all this, counters the rebellion.  Is there such a thing as a wise rebel.  I think there is when you pick and choose what to be rebellious with and how to do it.  Giving a middle finger to the back of life instead of the front so to speak.  Others may see you, but not the ones that can make your life difficult.  In this case, there is a wisdom to embracing my rebel self as it keeps the boiler of life from exploding with a safety valve.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  5. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  6. Writing – 3000 Words

Solid.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 5

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  5. By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Milestones” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Journal Entry:

A family member once remarked to me that my goals and bucket list items were good but seemed unrealistic at times or might be hard to achieve.  I told them that is kind of the point.  For me Goals, whether the regular yearly ones or the ones on my bucket list are milestones on the journey. Markers of progress.  The goals are about getting somewhere even if that somewhere is gone to simple for enjoyment’s sake.

My bucket list items are just that – the enjoyment of life milestones.  They are the subject this week of review and one that I enjoy every time in doing because they are the ones that cause me to dream the biggest.  The point of a bucket list is to keep you living life and if done right has things crossed off it regularly.  Also though there should be things on it when you die.  The most damning thing in my mind for a human being is not to have his eye on the horizon toward the next mile marker even when you’re dying.

You can milestones or gravestones – the choice is yours.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

I want hiking to be more of a regular hobby of sorts.  I need out more and even if alone hiking offers me that thinking solace that I enjoy, but also the fresh air and exercise do wonder to my mood.  My bucket list item here is about my first long camping hike.  After that who knows.  Hiking the AP, PCT, and CDT in retirement?  Maybe.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

My first and last time in Budapest was so fast and I enjoyed it but I want to go back as a travel goal.  Part of a longer trip to discover my origins, maybe that river cruise capstone of that experience.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

This a new one where I can say to people I read a book a week for a year but also a desire that this is a habit I get into as well.  I want to learn something right up to the day of my death.

Higher Virtue: Love:

I am looking at this part of my bucket list and realizing that persuing these three items is some of the most loving things I could do for myself. The journey to these three items is really about me getting something I would love to do. All of them are expressions of who I want to be and what I want to see in my life.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Shower, Personal Hygiene, Breakfast, Morning Meds.
  3. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  4. Meditation – 5 min.
  5. Check Communications and Email.
  6. Paper Journal: Create a Daily Log and To-Do List.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

I need to get the mechanics for this routine down and some stuff for meditation purposes.  I do like how this works now.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Forging the New Me” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

There is no doubt after leaving the ministry and faith that I need to forge a new me.  Sure it is going to be made out of the base materials of my life that are left, but it is going to have to be new.  This is the hard part and it is also the getting started part too which makes it even more difficult. Except, it’s getting a little easier.

I saw a member of my former congregation a couple days ago at my work and it took me back for a second until I walked by them and she walked by me,  She looked at me, knew who I was and said nothing.  I responded in kind.  It was a triggering experience to be sure, but for some reason, I got over it much quicker than I thought I would.  Shit,  The further I get along from those events it seems the better I slowly get and it becomes easier to focus on the future.  The only exception seems to be lost love – Miss Salty.  I still struggle with that, but who I am and changing it is becoming easier.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

Nothing really about this goal that I can say other than the removal of some of the crap still remaining in my diet was a little easier than I thought. I feel better and the transition continues. The issue is to have myself be going strong Paleo by March 31st.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

I am thinking next week I will switch my walking indoors.  I hate treadmills but it is the only option for me right now that the snow has arrived.  This is the other goal that has a finish line in March so I just have to keep going.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

Goal Achieved

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

Wisdom is hard here.  I need a major change in direction in my life,  I can see that.  I just don’t know what is going to fly off when it happens.  I know if I stay where I am and doing what I am doing, it won’t end well.  I can see it.  Wisdom says that I need to put off the past as much as possible and that is what I need to do.  The dross of the past needs to go and the new me forged from the iron that remains.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  5. Reading – 1/7th of a book
  6. Writing – 3000 Words

This is going to be good I can tell already.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 5

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  5. By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Borrowing Perseverance” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

Perseverance is a Self Virtue in my system but I need to borrow it for business for a bit.  Mostly there have been new rounds of rejections for jobs and I need to take a deep breath and go at it again.  My issue is that this is a little discouraging and I am trying not to let it bring on The Grey right now and that means getting up and continuing to go forward.

I am thinking of another angle as well.  I am very much upset about the amount of time I wasted on something that was very false and phony as a career now.  I see Christianity for what it really is – one of the most colossal frauds ever.  It wouldn’t; bothe me so much but I wasted probably my most energetic and productive years doing ministry as a Christian pastor and now have to find a new way forward.  I decided given my atheism to join The Clergy Project, a support group for ministers who have no belief in god anymore.  I am hoping to find the connections I need to move forward a little better.

My Business Virtues are about being independent, hard-working and hospitable with the excess of my prosperity. The job I need has a  few requirements but most notably that it has to allow me to write and to be active in things as well as making me a little more money than I am now.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

I believe in liberty and freedom not just for myself but for anyone.  I believe in freethought being the way to liberty.  If I could find something that allows me to advocate for this, that would be awesome.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I always enjoy working.  I enjoy coming home afterward too but the work causes me to appreciate the downtime more.  I like to be efficient and some of the things that bother me at work are when I can see things are not efficient and there is no way to fix it.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I have no aversion to helping others, I just lack the means to do so and the cause that would be something that would help me focus on what I want to do in this regard.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

It’s all about being just in every relationship I have. At least, just on my side of things.  My part fo the relationship needs to be me acting as fairly and justly as possible depending on what happens in each one.  A simple goal but difficult to achieve.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Getting Ripped” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

Since my post last week in Self Virtues where I pointed out that I have had pretty good results as far as weight loss and my A1c, I have been meditating on how far I could take this.  How much fat can I lose and how ripped can I get.  I like this feeling to be sure, but it is also a matter of setting my sights on a goal I have never achieved – being ripped and leaned out as much as possible.  To look in the mirror and know that I have sculpted a work of art using nutrition, weights and walking.

I am still looking at my bucket list but I also want to set out a preliminary plan to engage from now until the end of March 2020 to do one thing – get ripped.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

Nutrition is the lynchpin on this.  I need to truly get serious about the paleo diet and be doing ti as completely as possible. If I can do it from now until the end of the holidays in December, I will have taken a big step in mastering nutrition.  Not that I won’t have cheat meals for the purpose of celebrating moments but the daily carb allowance needs to stop altogether.

My bucket list item will mean all the more to me if I am in great shape.  No change to it, just a heightened sense of anticipation.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

One of the things I said a long time ago is that the reason I want fit body is so the tattoos I want to get will be on a canvas worthy of art.

I need to make sure my routine is more scientific in the sense it has an exercise that hits every single muscle in the split and truly helps both metabolism-boosting and the look.  Stronger happens just by weight lifting.  what I need is to make sure I am sculpting my body, not just doing whatever.

Fidelity:

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

Health is the main objective here.  I only have one life and I want to live it as long as possible and with the highest quality of health possible.  The person ultimately responsible for that is me.  I do want to visit all the countries of my ancestors and I want to do that standing up and strong.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

Of course, there is more to sculpting yourself than just your body. Sculpting your mind and heart is good too. It has amazed me how my dwelling in the land of fitness has crossed over with wisdom for other areas of my life.  Mostly the need to lean out from things I no longer need that just weigh down my life and are not healthy for me to have. Then building strength in places I do need.  It seems to carry over to all of life really.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  5. Reading – half an hour for enjoyment.
  6. Writing – 1 hour

I added writing and took away walking.  It is getting cold, so in November my walking will be a half-hour during my workout instead.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 4

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Reinventing Myself” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues.

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

You wouldn’t think that reinventing yourself at 50 would be that hard.  I agree with Steve Harvey on the idea that you are never too old to do it, but I also feel like society throws more obstacles in the way of older people doing this than younger ones.

I guess the hardest thing is selling your experience without asking too much for it because you are engaged in a career change.  I just want a better job with better pay.  Not asking for the moon here.  I am hitting crunch time though as the student loan payments are coming soon and it would be nice to not have to do a deferment.

As far as bucket list items in this area, there are a couple changes.  Mostly this is a writer’s bucket list, not a business man’s bucket list and I have one major bucket list change below to reflect that.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

New here, to reflect my change of vocational vision. Writers write for publication so that is where I am heading.  That’s about one book every couple of years minimum.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

No changes and fits now even better.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I still want to own my own home so this stays.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I don’t know if my interaction with others is the same as it was.  I know I have as a goal to treat people in such a way that I would never do to them what I didn’t want to be done to me and I consider that justice.   That said I don’t just forgive anymore – you have to earn that.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

This is the one routine that will stay the same. It works when I do it.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“A Writer’s Bucket List” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Journal Entry:

Well, I have reached the week where I look at my bucket list but I have also added the additional task of redoing my Routines.  Mostly though my decision to be a writer first and whatever else to pay the bills means some changes to both.  I have to develop two habits to do that 1) writing (on top fo the blog consistently every day) and 2) Reading.  I need to work that in right now and have some goals or bucket list items attached to them.

My bucket list is really about long term goals and having those mile markers on the journey where I can say – ‘hey. life is good’.  There are a couple bucket list items that looking at them may not be completely of this vein so I am thinking of changing them and they should reflect in some way the virtue I have attached them to as well.  it has been a year for many of them so it is time for a look again because what motivates me and inspires me has probably changed.

Routine changes are more about finding what practically works.  My morning routine works but my formal meditation time need some attention. The work and rest Day routines simply need to be ordered so the reading and writing get done every single day.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

I still want to do this.  I do have as kind fo a side identity being a hiker and wayfarer in real life.  I want to see this as my first big hike. It stays.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

I still want to do this.  One of my other ones is to visit the lands of my ancestors and I don’t think anyone has ever mentioned Hungarian ancestry, but I still love the city of Budapest.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

This bucket list item has been learning Latin but I have just not been able to inspire myself to learn it. More fitting with a writer and a desire for a long term goal about reading specifically, I want to read 52 books a year and that comes out to one per week. I decided the calendar year would be more appropriate for this one andI will probably use Goodreads for this for accountability.  I am going to however work this one in as soon as possible into the routine so once 2020 starts I will have developed the habit a bit.

Higher Virtue: Love:

I still struggle with this tension of being a natural care for others kind fo guy but neglecting myself at times. There are certain issues in my heart and head because of it. I have been meditating on this issue a lot but few things come into focus. its the age-old issue of self-love and care not getting done but me working hard to make others happy.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Shower, Personal Hygiene. Morning Meds.
  3. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  4. Meditation – 5 min.
  5. Check Communications and Email.
  6. Paper Journal: Create a Daily Log and To-Do List.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

I find the biggest obstacle to formal meditation is I am not awake enough to concentrate on it and I feel a little grungy too.  I figure doing my stretching and getting a shower will do that.  I also have split my medications and supplements into two things so the don’t upset my stomach as much.  My payday is coming up and I want to order some candles and I found a company that produces valknut plaques of a sort for meditation. Time to get this meditation time truly formal as it helps me far too much to not do it or be hit and miss anymore.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“The Walking Paradox – INFJ” – The Rabyd Skald

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sif’s Day

Anyone who has been a part of The Grey Wayfarer family knows that I talk often about my personality type.  Myers-Briggs to me does a fairly decent job of defining personality through its simple four-letter designation.  Well, four letters and dash with either an A or T behind it to indicate whether one’s identity is assertive or turbulent.  In my case, my full letter combo is INFJ-A. I have found that in exploring the implications of this I have discovered more about myself and it has helped me with that struggle because as we will see in a moment, INFJ’s struggle with this.

My recent musings into the subject led me to discover a YouTube video that talked about how INFJ’s are walking contradictions. It is something I have heard and explored a little but the video offered some very specific contradictions that seem to be part of most INFJ’s and so after watching it I have to ask myself if they apply to me and more importantly what they mean for me.

8 Reasons Why INFJs are Often Described as a Walking Paradox

I like firstly how the video points out that it is not that we intend to be misleading or lack conviction but that our personality type puts us into these tensions.  We have a high value on personal integrity and these contradictions are mostly due to our complex nature.  With that let us dive into the eight contradictions and see if and how they apply to The Grey Wayfarer.

One – Craving deep connections, but being so private:

My standards of friendship and love are fairly high. This is the product of my desire for deep connection.  I want a few good/great friends not a whole bunch of different ones.  When it comes to love there are certain expectations I have coming back toward me.

The problem, of course, is that I am so very private as a person.  It makes it hard to form those friendships and my wife is learning that love is something very important to me and she needs to spend some time nurturing it or I start to think very dark thoughts about our relationship.  This happened once right after our last child graduated high school and I was expecting that now the two of us would get to spend more time together and rekindle some of that fire we had before kids, but that didn’t happen.  It almost caused a divorce seven years later. Part of that was me having a hard time talking about it and the other was my high expectations.

Two – You find people interesting and draining at the same time:

I am definitely a people watcher but interaction with them is draining, to say the least. I can spend all day on a park bench watching people and studying them.  I have been that way for a long time, pretty much most of my life. But in social situations where I have to interact with people I can only do that for so long and then I have to retreat and regroup periodically.

Three – You can understand people better, but you hardly understand yourself:

Oh yeah, this is why I probably spend so much time talking about my personality and how it works.  It’s more about self-understanding and trying to figure myself out than anything else. I have to think about my motives and desires, where figuring out other people’s motives and desires because of my natural empathy is far easier.

Four –  You love to help others, but you find people annoying at the same time:

Yep.  It made me a good pastor but at the same time a pastor that was constantly annoyed with people continuing to make the same mistakes and continued to drain my time with the same problem. I find the fascinating part of people lasts only so long and then their flaws become so apparent that I am ready to head for the door and when I can’t head to the door I feel trapped.

Five – Being a perfectionist who often forgets small details:

Yep.  I have a whole slew of small routines that are designed to make sure I don’t forget the little things and everything has its place mostly for practical reasons along the same line. I like things to be clean and things to go according to plan.  When small details don’t pan out, I can feel let down for sure.

I also don’t notice the little achievements I make as much.  I am looking for the big goal to be accomplished, so when small successes along the way to those big goals are present, I rarely notice them

Six – You are natural loners, but people often mistake you for an extravert:

“Ed, sometimes you are hard to read” and “But I thought you would like that (insert name of a social event)”.  I have heard those two a lot over the years.  Mostly because I am fun-loving and sarcastically humorous enough to wade through most social situations.  I am confident and my ‘-A’ tells you I am also assertive. I was a pastor that dealt with people on a regular basis. I get mistaken for an extravert a lot.

However, I would rather be home alone reading a book or writing or name that at home alone activity.  I am quite comfortable with my own company so I don’t ‘need’ social situations but I do need them periodically to remind me that I am a member of the human race.

Seven – You want to be in a relationship, but often choose to be single:

I am not single but the issues of being in a relationship that is loving are pretty high for me as I possess very high standards of what love is.  This actually causes a lot of problems in this area as I am very aware of what love is but most cannot live up to what I think. The video is spot on about being in love being rare as it has only happened to me three times and when it does I tend to take it hard when it doesn’t work out.

Eight – They are complex, but they have integrity:

This video describes us as being like an onion that you have to peel layer after layer away to get to a true understanding of an INFJ, and I don’t know too many INFJs that would disagree.  It can take literally years to completely understand all aspects of our personality. In the end, if you take that kind fo time you may actually understand us better than we understand ourselves.

Our idealism, however, has a large amount of personal honor to it.  It is no accident that the part of Asatru I struggle with the most is honor and it is the struggle I consider most important. I find it actually more upsetting to myself at my failure to uphold my honor than I give two shits about what others think of it.

Conclusion:

Being walking contradiction or paradox is probably the most accurate thing I have heard to describe me.  Whether this applies to other INFJs I would not speculate but if it is common enough to talk about this way, it is probably mostly true.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!