Desires

Of Wolves and Ravens: Perseverance – Stubborn Purpose

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

I think when it comes to Perseverance, my strength with it is that it comes very naturally.  On the other side of it; because it does come naturally to me, it is hard to write about it and explain it. The things that come most naturally to a person are so deep-seated at times that they do the almost without thought.  So when someone asks you how you do it; it’s not that you don’t know, it is that you find it hard to explain something that is probably best described as deeply spiritual.

So when I keep getting up from defeat or failure, I guess the best thing to say about it is that I don’t like the feeling of being down on the ground, so I stand back up a quickly as possible.  It is just habit.  I suppose that is the goal of following every virtue, that the actions they lead you to do be come automatic habit. In this case, I think I am there already in that respect.  Mostly my growth here is trying to figure out how Perseverance applies to more and more things and the way it applies and to what extent.  How much of this stubbornness with a purpose is needed to get through life successfully.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

To me the need for perseverance connects with the simple basic need to survive.  But more than that, I don’t think any successful person; at any level, has ever gotten there without Perseverance.  You will never be successful at anything unless you keep training, practicing, follow discipline and do it over and over again until you are successful. If you don’t get how much this is necessary, than that is probably the reason you are not successful.

Wants (Freki):

Wanting Perseverance seems secondary when you consider how much it is needed. You want it because you want that feeling of being on top of the mountain, of looking at what you have built and having that feeling of being satisfied, etc.  You don’t get to those moments without Perseverance.

Reason (Huginn):

Survival and Success are two rational goals in life. “Live long and prosper.” Like it or not there are other forces in this world that will challenge that and you need some force to counter them.  Perseverance is that force.

The part I am discovering now is how perseverance connects with purpose.  How it gives you purpose.  It gives you reason to keep going.  How it gives you clearer vision of what you want to be and how you are going to get there. It makes such vision practical and very real.

Wisdom (Muninn):

I think I have learned the most life lessons after standing back up again. I have gained the most wisdom just standing back up. You, the gentle reader, read a lot of things here on The Grey Wayfarer that are simply a product of me standing up again.

Conclusion:

“Coyotes Never Quit.” It statement that was made to me by my football coach back in 9th grade during the heat of two a day practices.  It is something, that has stuck with me.  Back then it meant in four years, no matter how I felt. I never missed a practice and I never used an excuse not to get back on my feet. I never got too much opportunity to play on the field, but for life later, it has been the secret to my survival and successes.  It has given my life Stubborn Purpose.  Otherwise known as Perseverance.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – The Path to Self-Fulfillment

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Journal Entry:

I find walking to be fulfilling.  In that regard, I think the path I choose in life should also be fulfilling.  I never want to be in the position I was before asking: “What do I get out of this?”, and not have a positive answer.  I don’t believe this is selfish, so much as it is self-preservation.  Perseverance requires something within to stand back up and keep going.  Something has to feed that.  We do things that either feed that or drain it. When we are drained, we can do some very dumb things to find peace and happiness.  I speak from experience.

Putting it together then as I stand at a crossroads o fork in road as life’s wayfarer, I guide my decisions based on these there criteria. Does this path lead to Virtue, does this path lead to Success and does this path lead to Self-fulfillment.  If the path has a yes to all three of those, it is likely one I should take, More often than that I find that either 1) Many paths meet this three-fold requirement and then other factors come in or 2) none of them meet all three, so I pick the one that has the most, and then hope for a choice down the road that is better.

At the end of the day, I simply want to look back at my choices as say they followed virtue, lead to success and were fulfilling personally.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

I still keep looking to make discipline more and more of my life. Getting past the times of The Grey is simply easier when I do things automatically.  I am however making a major change in that I am working on the idea that all my steps and routines must be done as much as possible before I can take a break or do something I enjoy.  The greatest challenge I face is to take a break from things, and then not have the discipline to return.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

I guess the feeling I have here is like a hiker who has hiked through as storm and now looks back from the hill and sees that storm behind him.  It doesn’t mean that there are not more storms ahead, but there is some satisfaction in looking at what I survived. Then you look forward in new strength and keep going forward.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

It is times of the Storm that challenge you in regards to fidelity.  There is tension between loyalty to ones self, and loyalty to those who have been loyal to you.  Some how you have to be loyal to yourself and do what you need to do for you, but at the same time not forget those who have been loyal to you.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom: 

Virtue, Success, and Self-fulfillment.  Sounds like the path of wisdom to me.

Weekly Routine: 

  1. Weightlifting – 4 days per week.
  2. Cleaning – 3 days a week.
  3. Walking – 4 days a week
  4. Writing – 4 times a week
  5. Cheat Meal Count – Currently 0

#1 and #3 are still on hold until the weather improves and I get a better job that can allow me to afford the gym again.   I have an idea for writing that will probably start me down that path more consistently.

Evening Routine:

  1. Take supplements and medications.
  2. Brush and Floss Teeth
  3. Out the Door Preparation
  4. Reading – 15 min.
  5. Go to Bed

The evening routine is the most challenging of all of them. This is because I have to wait to the end of the day for it to happen and by that time The Grey might basically be motivating me to just go to bed.

Nutrition:

I am definitively have troubles with the zeros.  I don’t think this is a level I will stay at.  The one that worked and was most comfortable and successful was two cheat meals a week and two carb sources a day.  After my birthday, it is where I will probably camp for a while. The one thing I can say is the diet has kept my weight and fitness level stable despite no walking or the gym.

Weekly Recap:

Foundational –  I feel better here.  I don’t like thinking about the past because it is a bummer.  It is sometimes unavoidable.  That said, thinking about a more positive future for myself and my wife has been a good way to move on. Virtue has been the key there.

Business – Success and defining it have been very helpful this week.

Self –  Need to remember me.  Self loyalty is a must.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – The Path to Success

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day. 

Journal Entry:

So if there is a compass direction; as far as career direction at this point, it is business with writing on the side. I may still in older age settle down to teaching in a college or university setting; passing on what I know to future generations, but I need to build a new career first. Business suits me because I have long-held the Sam Walton notion that business is about people and ideas (mostly vision), not necessarily money,  My twenty years in the ministry definitely gives me the people skills and my education definitely puts me in the position of ideas.

Writing?  Well I am writer.  A blogging fantasy writer that has yet to get anything published except a single letter in a magazine a long time ago.  Made fifty bucks.  I get writing could be classified as a hobby with me, but It could be a good side career or main career if things really started to get going.  It is never too late with writing as Mary Jackson observed:

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, text

I start with the path of virtue which will hopefully lead to the path of success.  I think a business career; with writing as something I work at because I love it already, is a good option for me.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

I just want to wake up in the morning knowing my basic needs will be met and I am at least slowly but surely heading down the path to getting some of the things I want. I don’t want to worry about survival at all. I just want to be in a state of mind that can plan how to build things.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

The means of course is work and what helps is when you enjoy work itself. Where you can learn new ways of being more efficient is also enjoyable. I think the only thing here I am really missing is a job I actually want to do.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

I find that a broad definition of hospitality allows me to have a great deal of compassion for people in need still.  The great difference is that I either know I can help or not.  I don’t try this – I will pray for you or think of you – route.  If I can help, I try to find a way to do it.  If I can’t, I don’t.  The issue I think is more prosperity, so I can help more and more often.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Last weeks storm of emotion involved a lot of anger.  This is never productive but I find myself shifting from anger to developing a sense of justice. I may not ever get justice for what happened to me, but I can look at others and what they do and if I can do something about it, I should act.  If there is still a heart of compassion in my life held over from years of ministry; I still bat for the underdog.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading / Study – Half-hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  4. Clear In Box/ To Do List
  5. Financial Transaction Input
  6. Carb Count – zero.

Oddly enough the Financial transaction thing piles up on the side of my desk.  I don’t get it, as it is one of the easiest things on this routine list.  The zero carb count is almost impossible at home eating dinner with the wife usually kills it.  The main thing in this is more of a seeing how little carbs I can eat in a day.

Goals: 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of March 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

There are a couple of goals here for march that speak volumes about what I would like to see at the end a=of about six weeks here.  #9 will be finished on my birthday and I will be working on #3.  Going into my 51st year of life, a new job and feeling as healthy as possible would be a great start and two goals crossed off the list.

Goals achieved since Summer 2018: 1

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

We meet with the tax preparer on Monday and I am hoping for a good result.  I also am job searching, so I hope that bears some fruit as well.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens: Discipline – Pain Becoming Strength

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

I suppose life is full of strange ironies.  One of them is that you don’t get stronger unless you go through a little pain. Discipline as Virtue is something I have long practiced in certain regards, but until I started following the Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), I never really covered all of its facets.  Mostly that if you want growth or more strength, endurance, etc., it is probably going to take some form of discipline to make it happen. You can’t get there by just wishful thinking, prayer or vain hope.  It requires discipline.

Over the years personally, I have applied discipline to a lot of areas of my life.  Right now every routine I have created, every goal or list of objectives has some sort of systematic plan to getting there.  Things are not just going to happen, they have to be made to happen and this is particularly true with improvement to one’s self. I come to learn that more and more every day.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

I cannot stress the need for discipline enough. Without it the first steps cannot be taken to even achieve any goal that anyone sets for themselves.  I want to a new job right now, so each day I spend some time searching.  I can’t just hope that someone will offer me the perfect job.  I have to go find it.  I have lifted weights for years.  I want a strong, leaned out and healthy body, and I want it to last for as long as possible. I NEED discipline of diet, exercises and the weights to achieve this. Wanting is not enough.  You have to understand what you need to get what you want and that path is often filled with discipline.

Wants (Freki):

I suppose this relationship between need and want is very critical when it comes to discipline. You do have to ask yourself what you want.  What you really want. The test of whether you really want something is whether or not you ware willing to engage in the discipline to get it.  What sacrifices and pain are you willing to go through to get what you want.  When it comes to discipline, the two wolves dance back and forth, and when you figure out the steps to that dance, you make progress.

Reason (Huginn):

Rationally, when you look at the worlds great achievements, there was discipline behind every one of them.  The scientist who had the breakthrough discovery, spending weeks and months in disciplined study before the discovery.  The athlete who sets the world record, a lifetime of disciplined exercise and drill. Etc.  The one thing that reason tells us is that if we are going to reach our goals, discipline is the path we must walk. Then it helps us come up with that plan.

Wisdom (Muninn):

I have an image in my head of what I want to be.  It is not completely formed, but it is a vision of what I would like to be.  Wisdom says the path is disciplined action over time that will be the greatest contributor to getting that vision to become reality.  It is what will place me in a postition; that when opportunity arrives, I will be strong enough to take it and hold on to it.

Conclusion:

I don’t know what others think of discipline.  I know that pain and sweat is not something people like to experience. I just know that no change has taken place in my life or to myself without either. It is perhaps and ironic fact of life, that strength comes through pain.  But there is that moment of satisfaction that you have when the results are achieved that far outweighs the pain in the end.  So there is that truth – discipline also leads to satisfaction.  That feeling of satisfaction, is greater than any pain or struggle.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Rogue Wizard – The Fire of Fury – Part 5 – Pixie Trouble (1)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day

Rogue Wizard’s Journal January 14th, 2019

I am writing the next few journal entries after the fact of what happened by about a week.  Mostly this is due to being held captive for the last five days. My life has definitely taken turn here that is major. But is probably best to start at the beginning.

Lunette did eventually show up.  Three days after Raven had paid her visit.  In my younger days Lunette had that sensual attractiveness of a teenage girl to me.  The prom queen type, and I was at the time the lucky nerd on her arm for most of Middle School.  High School changed all that and we became in a sense estranged.  We still were the only two magical touched beings of our class, so we found ourselves at times as uneasy allies against darker powers.  Lunette became increasingly more about herself .  More about the using of her abilities to manipulate and control others.  Yeah, I kept my distance during high school.

I don’t want to say age has mellowed Lunette, but she looks a little less confident of herself these days. She looks like a fully mature adult female.  She seemed more cautious in her actions.  More deliberate and calculated.  I could tell this from just watching her move and the way she talked. She was no longer speaking to me in passion but in very calculated thought, measuring each word.

She stopped by on the morning of January 8th; and after letting her in, I had a deja vu moment as I sat in my chair and she sat pretty much exactly where Raven had a few days ago.  I was beginning to think my life was looking up with two attractive females visiting my bachelor pad in less that a week; but then again both of them were dangerous as coiled venomous snakes.  Lunette for her part had worn a skirt with leggings but her upper body was encased in a fur coat.  Her female curves enhanced with pixie charms were damn near perfect. Those wings of her’s fluttering behind her were the major difference in the two encounters with these two females.

I didn’t really waste much time with small talk.  I was being as cautious as hell.

“OK, it seems to me we left our conversation at me asking you what you have been doing with your life since we parted.  You then looked very sheepish and then we were rudely interrupted by magical gunfire so to speak.”

Lunette then looked a little sheepish again.  She hesitated for a moment and then she opened her mouth and began.

“After I was exiled from the Grove, I wandered a bit.  Decided to pass myself off as human for a while by going to college and doing some modelling. The bills got tight as you can imagine, so I did a little exotic dancing to supplement.”

She stopped at that point and looked at me like she was fishing for a reaction.  I kept quiet, but my thoughts were she could have made that a career for a decade and retired.  Her natural pixie looks and illusion abilities would have made her a top of the line porn star for that matter. I kept my face stoic like she had simply given me the temperature outside, so she continued.

“I graduated, but I couldn’t find a job, so I began to work freelance jobs in the magical world.  Discovered I had a talent for it really.  Mostly, finding out secrets and selling them to the highest bidder. The only problem with that; as you know, is you make enemies and some of them can be pretty powerful. But I have so far navigated all that.  This war has made that more difficult.”

“Personal Relationships?”

She laughed.

“Well, I am Pixie.  You know a lot of passionate fucking, but nothing really serious or long-term.  In the pixie world being an exile makes you not so desirable as a mate for making kids. Besides, I don’t really want children. They would be too much of a liability in this line of work.”

“Yeah, I think about that myself.  If I get too involved, my kids and grand kids become targets too.  No matter what the Council says the rules of engagement are; they will go after them if I get too involved. War tends to make rules go out the window in order to achieve victory.”

“Yeah, I guess both of us are under the gun there.  My parents are gone, so it is just me though, so I guess in that regard I have an advantage over you.”

“Well, I guess I could disappear.  That wouldn’t make them safe though.  They could still be used to flush me out. No.  I just don’t know.”

Lunette nodded.  She had been sitting with her legs crossed, but now she had her knees together with her feet slightly apart and she was leaning forward.  Her fur coat was unbuttoned and so her button up shirt which was undone a few buttons on the top revealed a pretty nice view of her cleavage.  I had to admit some old feelings were starting to surface and they were more about lust than love.  Only the seriousness of the topic had been keeping them in check.

“Edward, I am sorry about what happened and how I acted toward you after middle school.  I was a brat back then.  I just had different plans and an attitude to match.”

“Well, in the end both of us were exiled for our own actions Lunette. Although I am not quite sure what I did in the end.  But she ….”

“It’s OK Edward, you don’t have to say anything.”

“So, what business are you here for?  You are on business too, not just to renew an old relationship?”

“Yes, I am. I have a client that wants to talk to you about an offer that may help you with your problem with the Council.  I am here to arrange the meeting.”

“I see, and who is your client?”

“She would rather introduce herself in person. I am just here to take you to her if you are interested.”

“I am not trying to be rude Lunette, but my trust level is a little low right now of anyone. I mean from all accounts you have a bounty on your head from several different sources. I might be being over cautious, but I think if I am going to meet this client of yours, she would have to come here where I would feel more safe.”

“I see.  Well, I am sure she would not do that.  She has her own level of paranoia that is justified.  I don’t know what else I can do to assure you this is not a trap.”

“Not sure you can.  Our relationship has been dead for a long time and even though I can feel for you about your situation, I have my own that is a little difficult as you know.  I am guessing that I would be in the presence of other magical beings, and that means outnumbered and outgunned if shit goes south.  Sorry, too much of risk for me.”

She actually looked at me like she expected that answer.  She nodded.

“Well, OK.  I get it.  I should probably get back to her and tell her.”

Lunette got up, buttoned up her coat and then she came closer to me. I took a deep breath and, before I could react, she leaned over a bit and kissed me on the cheek. I would have thought it a nice gesture of renewed friendship except I instantly felt very tired and literally collapsed to the floor losing consciousness.  The last words I heard her say as I did lose consciousness were:

“Sorry Edward, but this is for your own good.”

I remember thinking that I was a complete idiot, but then everything went black.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – Navigating Stormy Seas

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day. 

Journal Entry:

Last week it was talk of a master plan.  This week it is trying to find a course to chart.  If I have a weakness here it is figuring out where I want to go from here.  I guess it is on the one hand understandable.  After doing one thing for twenty years, going a completely different direction which is in large part unknown is difficult.

I guess sometimes, I do feel like the viking boarding the ship and the notion of that captain is to just set sail into uncharted territory and see where we land in the end. You still have to pick a direction to sail, and that is the thing. What direction to sail?

There is also the issue of The Grey having created a bit of an emotional storm to navigate.  It is; however, subsiding a little. I guess I still struggle with unfinished business. I still struggle with not being able to end certain relationships the right way. They need to be ended, but they kind of don’t sit well with me right now. I guess I still struggle internally with trying to figure out the just way of doing so.

I think I have made  the decision to follow the business path as my basic compass direction.  I think it is the path that will allow me to use skills I already have and my education to the best use.  I am thinking a fully online MBA while I work in business; from an educational point of view, would be a good next step there.  I just don’t know where specifically this will take me. What shore will I ultimately land on.  Well that is the adventure part, isn’t it?  To pull out of the storm, I could really use an adventure right now.

I also have decided to actually make a plan for writing that novel.  That is my bucket list item and it could be a career if I get one novel to be published the right way,  It is something I can do in a few hours a week at first.  I have participated in National Novel Writing Month a few times and know you can write a lot of things in a short time.

Self-Reliance:

“Self Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual, but also for the family, clan, tribe and nation.”

Principle: Work to be self-reliant in all things.

I guess the issue here is that I feel I have achieved self-reliance of a sort for myself and my wife.  I mean we could use greater prosperity, it is the line about ‘family, clan, tribe and nation’ that I ponder from time to time.  It may affect my career path and affect me decisions about what course to set and what education to pursue.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with enjoyment of work itself.

I work hard.  I enjoy working.  I want to enjoy my career again.  I haven’t felt that enjoyment of occupation in about three years now. I want it back because it really gives you a sense of purpose.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: Be ready to be hospitable to those who truly need it.

I wrote on hospitality yesterday.  I guess right now I am meditating on how to be a person who people feel at home in my presence. It is an interesting thing to think on.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I struggle with justice.  I don’t vengeance, I want justice and that is much harder to achieve.  Probably at the center of the source of this storm right now is this desire for justice and knowing it might never happen.  There is also the notion that perhaps the scales are balanced because I am not exactly innocent here, but then again real friendship shouldn’t be about guilt or innocence.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging
  3. Reading / Study – Half-hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  4. Clear In Box/ To Do List
  5. Financial Transaction Input
  6. Carb Count – currently one a day.

Daily stuff can be the greatest struggle during the Grey.  I give in to the temptation to skip things a lot during these times, but I notice when I don’t I get a little better, so things do get done. Just not everything some days.

Goals: 

  1. Be transparent with my wife to improve communication
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship.
  3. Find a new, better paying job by the end of March 2019 or before.
  4. In 2019 have  a clear budget and financial plan working by the end of the year.
  5. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).
  6. Keep gym membership going somewhere and lift weights minimum of four times per week and walk minimum four times per week through end of 2019
  7. Follow Paleo Diet completely and use intermittent fasting until the end of 2019
  8. Cross one thing off bucket list every six months (Deadlines July 1st, and December 31st of 2019)
  9. Be in the best shape I can be by March 18th, 2019 (50th birthday), take pictures.

I made finding a new job a goal by the end of March now, it is simply a practical change seeing I haven’t found one yet. I don’t keep track of goals that either don’t pan out or I have to modify. You never want to focus on your failures.

Goals achieved since Summer 2018: 1

Budgeting: 

  1. Basic Emergency Fund – $1000
  2. Debt Snowball
  3. Fully funded Emergency fund
  4. Invest 15% of income into retirement
  5. Pay off Home Early
  6. Build Wealth and Give

Tax time coming.  I am hoping that step one will be in place because of it.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens – Hospitality: Home Presence

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

As a virtue hospitality is something I have a grasp on intellectually.  It’s pretty simple to be ready to be helpful in any way possible and opening up your home to strangers in need is something you can provide is not hard to understand. It is one basic way of expressing it, but expression of hospitality is a little deeper than that. I like the quote about better where people feel at home in your presence. Because it is the kind of hospitality that can always be expressed.  You can always be hospitable by choice to anyone who simply needs to be in the presence of someone who makes them feel comfortable in a bad situation. At the very least learning not to be a dick is probably a positive thing to do.

In Christianity I spent a lot of time pondering the notion of – ‘love you neighbor as yourself’.  Jesus is pretty clear on the fact that even one’s supposed enemies or even people we find disgusting are one’s neighbors.  I get it; but more pragmatically, hospitality is simply being human to another human.  To see them not as objects but as they are – as people.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

Hospitality has a certain level of need on both sides. 1) People are going to face things beyond their control and sometimes those things are devastating to life.  People need help sometimes and to reach out a hand and help them in those times can fill a great need.  2) You need to be hospitable for yourself.  I mean if your going to prove that your decent human being and treat others as humans.  Your human side needs this, so you don’t start feeling you have gone completely over to the dark side.

Wants (Freki):

We want hospitality and to be hospitable. Those moments are something we cherish when we led a hand or someone lends a hand to us. Less positive is when someone kicks us when we are down or takes advantage of our distress or bad decisions. We also want hospitality on both side for ourselves and others.

Reason (Huginn):

Rationally, hospitality is the heart of humanism.  It is about the notion that the solution to human problems is humanity.  We show great humanity in hospitality.  It is also actually acting rather than some other activity where we put on airs that we are helping but it reality we are doing nothing.  Prayer comes to mind. I know other people think prayer is doing something, but I used to see it as a most convenient excuse to not actually help someone and instead ‘pray for them’ for which they should thank you. Even though you didn’t do anything to actually help their situation.  The irony was there are many verses of The Bible that caution against this; but we would run to the ones on prayer to say we were still doing something.

Wisdom (Muninn):

Wisdom says that hospitality is what make the world a better place.  Not government, not laws, not better ideas.  Simply being a free human, freely helping our fellow humans. So that people feel at home when we are around knowing that the benefits and comforts of home are there with us; regardless of how far they are away from their actual home.

Conclusion:

For myself the biggest switch has been to dump the whole “I will pray for you” excuse and try to find something I can actually do.  It is hard to say to people: “Sorry, I can’t help you”, but it is more honest. When I can help, I act to do so.  When I can find someone who can help when I can’t is also a possibility. The one thing I never want to do anymore is create some activity that I claim is helping, but isn’t really doing anything. If I am going to justly toward others; with justice, part of that is making sure I am actually acting on the problem, not just ignoring it.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Odin’s Eye – My Humanism

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

This holiday season provided some awkward moments for me. One such moment was when people asked me what I believed. It is about that time that I tell them I am a deist, humanist with pagan tendencies. This of course gets a raised eyebrow. The real tricky part is actually the humanist part that probably gets the most time explaining.  My humanism is about what I look to solve my problems.  Because humanism looks at the one thing we probably really have to solve them – humans.

Humanism has four basic parts as E.M Forster points out above.  1) Curiosity, 2) A Free Mind, 3) Belief in Good Taste and 4) Belief in the Human Race. I concur with this because the only thing I can actually see and interact with when it comes to my problems and the problems of humanity is human beings. More on this when we look through the eye.

Everything else is just theory and hope.  Humanism is the side of my system of belief that engages the reality around me, and moves forward with the best solution that I and other human beings can come up with because; ultimately, it is what we have.  If there is a God;and my deism says their might be, he either expects us to do things ourselves, doesn’t give a fuck or is engaged in more important matters than your or my issues.  Spirituality might help me keep my balance personally, but it is my humanism that tells me to take responsibility for myself .

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

I suppose the biggest thing of ‘faith’ in humanism is belief in the human race.  I am also convinced that Penn Jillette is also right – 1) We human beings always think things are getting worse but 2) Things are actually getting better. When it comes to humanist the media, politicians and religious folks keep pointing to humanity’s failures and it makes it seem like they are the majority.  The problem is when you look at real facts, humans as a general rule are good and getting better. The truth is when it comes to having faith in humanity it is not as much of a blind leap of faith as people think.  It is those that would rule us telling us the bogey man exists so we will fear and then follow them that paint that picture.  Reality does not really do that.

Religion:

Religion in Humanism is negated by a free mind. In my former Christianity I was never allowed to question people’s beliefs, if they lined up with the basic tenets of the religion.  I certainly we never allowed to question the Bible or the church. In short, there were certain thoughts I was never allowed to consider.  That is pretty much all gone now thanks to my belief in free thought and free speech that goes with that. I can now question literally everything. I now see religion for what it is – a set of chains. Sorry, I refuse to wear them.

Theology:

My theology of humanity has changed somewhat and there is still a lot of questions I am considering.  But the one thing I believe in about humans is that they are ‘good’ or at least they are simply human.  I don’t have this notion; that is purely made up, that people are sinners in need of grace. What I believe is we are human and have limits but we also have potential, strengths and weaknesses.  Thanks to genetics I also know that each of us is truly unique.  Each of us then has our own set of weakness, strengths, abilities and desires. I believe that we can achieve great things as human being in pursuing truth, beauty, liberty and equality.  I know I am running headlong into a few objections most notably this one:

“Humanism was not wrong in thinking that truth, beauty , liberty and equality are of infinite value, but in thinking that man can get them for himself without grace” – Simone Well – French Philosopher (1909-1943)

My counter to this argument is that those who hold the idea of the need for grace to get these things are actually attacking the notion of natural rights they say they believe.  If the natural rights argument is true, there is no need for these things to be given as human beings as they are already given by their creator.  In my case, I say those things are already present in man and the only question is how to grow them and profit by doing so.

Spirituality:

As a humanist I can say I am spiritual.  I am however not religious at all.  For my part, this means I have rejected living off the spiritual experiences of others, or the collectivism and hive mind of religion. I seek my on spiritual experiences and to be honest I find this more in daily life than anything else.  I do however get an interesting reaction to saying I am spiritual but not religious, by said religious people:

Image may contain: 1 person, meme and text

Sorry, my humanism keeps my spiritual experiences in the context of the human experience. I find the spiritual in the moments I am kissing my wife, making love or watching my grandchildren play.  I find the spiritual moments on my walks in the woods, when the wind wraps itself around me and when I hear the lap of waves on the shoreline of Lake Michigan. Mostly though my spirituality is based on the humanist notion of curiosity.  My wonder and desire ‘to know’ is what it is based on, not voodoo, just being a human being that wants to know and experience.

Conclusion:

I know I didn’t really cover the notion of ‘good taste” But it kind of ends things really.  The whole thing of humanism is to see the ‘good’ in humanity and minimize the ‘evil’.  I achieve that first and foremost by seeing the good in myself and trying to be a better human being.  If I can help my fellow human beings in their walk along that path along the way, well then I should try to do that as well.

Continuing to Walk the Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Rogue Wizard – The Fire of Fury – Part 4 – Ghost Church

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day. 

Rogue Wizard’s Journal January 7th, 2019

After two days of waiting for Lunette to show up; but she remained a no show, I finally had one of those problems that required me to leave the house. I was running out of food. So, I threw my college hooded sweatshirt over my shoulders and after gathering my wallet and my keys headed out.  Winter had finally arrived with the snow and cold; so I braced against the wind as I walked along. It jumped into the Dodge Journey and took off toward the nearest town with a Wal-Mart.

Based on what I knew, this would mean crossing the battle lines into mage territory, but it was midday and so I wasn’t to worried that the forces of mages would attack me.  They don’t like that kind of attention.  Despite this, I kept myself alert. Of course the benefit of being a battle-mage is that you carry your weapons with you at all times. No concealed weapon permit required. I went to Wal-Mart, got my groceries and a few other items and after paying, loaded the Dodge up and headed home.

There was some sort of accident; probably due to the snow and ice, on my normal route home. So the authorities were routing people different ways.  I turned on a side street long before that and took a way that was a little more circuitous but would still get me home in short order.  It was one of those roads that thirty years ago had been busy but with the freeway since was pretty abandoned.  I was driving by an old abandoned church and a strange feeling struck me.

Remember that thing about magic being drawn to magic?  That is what was happening. I could sense it.  I stopped the car and backed up into the church’s small parking lot.  The sign read ‘Faith Church” but the message in the message board of the sign said –
‘Closed’.  The snow couldn’t disguise the fact that the yard had been overgrown with weeds. There were no other buildings close by and in fact trees kind of isolated this small church with it’s small steeple on a corner of the road.  It had been painted white, but it was slipping into gray. The front doors were chained.

As I looked at the chained doors, I was thinking about how remarkably similar this church was to my last one as far as design.  Tall steeple with a sanctuary over the basement.  The little white church of song and postcards. Mine had been much larger but just as old and made of Michigan white pine.  It required constant maintenance to just keep it looking good and standing.  Expensive maintenance that I had often wondered what good could have been done to help people with all that money. Didn’t matter anymore, but this whole concept of maintaining a building sure seems to be an excuse not to help people in retrospect.

I approached the doors and looked at the lock. I could feel something drawing me to the inside, but I with the chained door I was pretty much stuck looking through the windows.  They were stained glass, so there was no way to really see inside. Then the lock popped open.  I looked twice and double checked the lock but it had been opened. The chains fell open as I removed it, and I opened the right door.

Oddly enough the inside was in pretty good repair. The entry way had its coat rack and bulletin board on which remained a couple newspaper clippings. It was the obituaries first of the last pastor of the place.  The second of a nineteen year old girl.  Date of death for both was the same day.  Then memory bank in my head awakened and I remembered the story from ten years ago.

The pastor and this young lady had been having an affair. His wife found out and threatened to tell the whole congregation if he didn’t end it.  He did end it, by committing suicide.  The girl was the one who discovered the body and she too killed herself.  Star-crossed lovers.  What a tragic and evil tale. All because of the judgmental nature of Christians, who righteousness is supposedly as filthy rags, but they had created an atmosphere of self-righteousness so strong, that the shame of what was happening was too great, so they ended their lives.

Of course my own failure at marriage fidelity flooded my memories at that moment.  The story was similar, but the end very different.  I guess the difference was I left my faith behind. The judgmental nature of supposed sinners who bask in the forgiveness of God when given to them; but then turn around and judge harshly other sinners is a hypocrisy I simply dismiss as no longer part of my life.  The anger of all that was welling inside me; however, and I could feel the fury building my magical rage.

With that thought a voice spoke behind me.

“Tragic isn’t it?”

I turned around expecting to see some caretaker, but instead I saw a ghost. A literal ghost. Well, two actually.   The first looked like a middle-aged gentleman in a suit and tie. He had glasses and in his free hand was a Bible.  His other hand held the hand of a young beautiful woman.  She was in a dress and had a flower in her hair.  Colors are difficult with ghosts, as they are usually white and various shades of grey.  The flower in her hair however was red and gold indicating it was something special to her.  She smiled at me.  Of course they were both partially transparent, as I could see coat rack behind them

Now I have met ghosts before. Most of them are pretty harmless; just souls with some unfinished business.  I of course had that first moment of queasy stomach knowing you talking to someone dead,  then I was OK.

“Actually, I was thinking about how my own story is pretty close to yours, only without the ending.”

“Yes, that ending could have been different.  What is commonly known is not even true. We were actually found naked in each others arms.  We had made love one last time before taking the pills. They left that out; changed the whole story actually. That and the fact were found up on the pulpit on a blanket on the floor.  One last ‘desecration’ they wanted to forget by not talking about it.  What you probably know is false.  That tends to be the way of things.”

I smirked as I recognized the sarcasm in his voice; so similar to my own.  He chuckled and as I looked at the girl, she looked down and had her cheeks been able to show color they might have shown a little blush.

“Don’t worry about it young lady.  You were in love and had nothing to be ashamed of in truth. I don’t get it though, what’s the unfinished business both of you could have?”

The girl spoke this time.  Her voice was a soft soprano, I could tell she must have sung in the choir.

“We are were not sure for a long time. My mother and his wife are still alive. Both of us had harsh last words with them, but it doesn’t explain it.  Although if it is the reason then when they die, we might fade but we no longer think so.  We felt you drive by and now know what it is.”

“Me.  I don’t recall meeting either of you in life.”

The man spoke this time.

“Basically Dickens and his ghost Marley in a Christmas Carol.  One last act of penance to someone who needs our message.  We know now that someone is you.”

“Me?”

“Yes, we know your story, it was heavy on your thoughts a few moment ago. That fury inside you is very powerful. It needs release or it will consume you, like our love consumed us. The fire it creates burns everything and if you don’t find a target outside yourself to direct it towards…. ”

The girls voice was hauntingly beautiful as she spoke.   I nodded at her words.

“My fury is directed at those who have lied about me and at the Council for killing my wife when we were just beginning to love each other deeply again.  In part, I suppose it is fueled by my loneliness and the thoughts of a few treacherous actions I want justice for.  Christianity’s ‘turn the other cheek’ seems very stupid when it comes to justice.”

The man spoke this time.

“Yes, it does cause people to be abused and shamed then justify those that do it to them. Understand we are not saying your fury is bad; just dangerous. Our message to you is a little more centered on letting go of the past, so you can focus that fire of your fury at a proper target now and not at yourself.”

I nodded.  I knew what he meant. My rage was mostly self-destructive right now.  It didn’t create any positive action.  The only positive effect is that it fueled my magic with tremendous power. But where to focus that power?

“You said you had a message for me, each of you.  What is it?”

“You first my dear,” the man said.

“I speak to you as a woman with a woman’s heart. This last year you have loved two women deeply.  One hurt you and the other forgave you.  I want to submit to you that the one that hurt you might have done you a tremendous favor.  You may very well have avoided a lot of rage directed at you and her because of her choice to leave you.  I don’t know her, but I know it crossed my mind more than once to leave; so we could live and maybe love again.  It might have been her motivation.  She may have been the smart one on the decision, because you couldn’t be. If there is a need for forgiveness that will help you and not upset your sense of justice; it is probably to forgive her.”

Tears poured down my cheeks.  The truth of what she said made it hurt again, but her words rang true, and I had made a commitment to the truth. As I  looked at the ghost girl I saw her start to fade.  She had been right.  Her unfinished business was her message to me.

The man looked at her.

“Go my dear, I will be along shortly.”

I watched as the girl completely disappeared.  Then he looked at me.  He looked like he was about to cry himself.

“My message is man to man. I have learned the folly of worrying too much about what people will think of me.  I paid for that with my foolish death. The only honor that matters is what you have for yourself. Remember that, when opinion is against you for doing the right thing or even for just following your heart.  Your honor is within you, it is not the product of whether other people respect you or not. Had I known that, the two of us might still be alive.”

I nodded again and then he too began to fade.

“Looks like we were right.”

“Thank you, both of you.”

He nodded and faded out of sight.  Now the church foyer had a truly empty feeling. Whatever spirit this little church had left and now passed on to the other side.  It was indeed abandoned now.  Kind of a metaphor for my faith in truth. I walked out,  padlocked the chains back in place, and then went home.

I don’t know what the future will hold, but I do know that the lessons those two ghosts taught me are going to be with me for a bit.

Author’s Note: You will notice that the dates for the journals are now slipping into the past.  This is by design as one of the magical forms my character uses is divination. The ability to see the future is part of that. From an authorship stand point that means using twenty- twenty hindsight instead.  There will be times where nothing is happening, and the time line used here can catch up, but I am going to keep it at leas a month into the past from now on to reflect the characters powers.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

Of Wolves and Ravens: Industriousness: Focused Effort

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

Industriousness is probably one of the Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) that makes things happen the most.  The other is discipline.  There are three elements to industriousness: 1) Hard work, 2) Efficiency and 3) Joy. Each of these elements must be present for their to be true industriousness, but there is one factor that must also be present for them to be useful – Focus.

What are you working for? It is the basic question of industriousness and it is both a deeply personal question and one of ethics and morals. Now I agree with Ayn Rand that there is a virtue to selfishness.  However, most people fail to read her other half of that which is that selfishness does not include exploitation of others.  The issue is what goal are you trying to achieve with your work and are your efforts actually focused in getting it done.  Along the way are you being efficient and joyful.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

We need to work hard.  It is the simple fact that no level of self-sufficiency is achieved without hard work.  Survival depends on work and the harder we work, the easier it is to survive. If there is any tragedy to life is it some people have developed the notion that success in life is a trick or scam that people pull on others.  Anymore who has actually studied the rich and successful will note these two things: 1) Most of them didn’t inherit anything from anybody and 2) They worked long hours and hard days to get where they are today.  They came to understand that industriousness does indeed reward those that work hard.

Wants (Freki):

We also want to enjoy the fruits of our labors. This is the product of learning to enjoy working.  To enjoy work in and of itself. It is also a sad tragedy that people have come to see leisure as something to be enjoyed, while work is something to dread. To me there is a joy in creation of something that didn’t exist before. I mean every day I start with a blank digital page in front of me and in often less than an hour there is a blog post.  There is a joy in this that is good for me. But that carries over to all things. Whether it is business or art, the joy of creation is in the industry of creation.

Reason (Huginn):

Reason of course, helps our focus with one thing – efficiency.  I mean as much as one can come to enjoy work, part of being industriousness and being focused is to not waste effort. Economics comes in here with its focus on getting the most efficient way to get the maximum results. This issue is finding the greatest prosperity for the minimal effort.  Then, however you also realize that more efficient effort (working hard) will bring even more prosperity because of the extra effort. The more efficient you are in working hard the more prosperity is brought to yourself.

Wisdom (Muninn):

Wisdom comes in to this discussion in the idea that the fruits are the reward and that such fruits are not the result of exploiting others for gain.  In fact wisdom makes you realize that the greatest amount of joy, efficiency and effort will come from looking to benefit more than yourself  When others join your efforts because it benefits them as well, that is far better than when they work to slow you down because you are exploiting them and so they resist.  It is better to look at ways every one benefits, so that greater things can be achieved than you can alone.

Conclusion:

I have learned a tremendous amount from looking at this virtue.  I have always tried to have a good work ethic. The issue has been constantly ‘what am I working for?’  Industriousness has allowed me to address that question.  I need to work to be self-sufficient. I want to work because there is a joy in creation.  I reason my way to be more efficient in my work to get the most out of my efforts. I work not just for myself but for others to achieve even greater things. Industriousness is focused effort toward certain goals and this is what makes it a very powerful and active virtue.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!