Month: September 2019

“Business: Doing it Right” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

 

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

This group of virtues is called Business using the idea of business in the broadest possible sense of the word.  It is about the relationships I have with others and how I relate to them more than anything. The triangle of the vulknut that represents these to me is the one that is highest up. It has the position then of being the most visible and the most important in relation to dealing with other people.

The three virtues of Self-Reliance, Industriousness, and Hospitality form the virtue of justice.  Justice is a difficult concept to define but it involves treating each person I meet with respect for their freedom and trying to treat them equally and fairly as possible.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

My belief in independence and liberty is an integral part of my views on everything from politics to economics to social issues.  In addition, it is part of my ethics to respect the choices of the freedoms of others. The business of life for me then is predicated on the notion that all my relationships are freewill and for mutual benefit.  They are never to be the product of the use of force, threat or fraud.  This cuts both ways as I won’t tolerate those who try to have a relationship with me using those forces either.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I think I am getting much better at enjoying work for work’s sake and the fact this leads to not being dependent on others for my livelihood is also very satisfying.  As I have said before, however, I think I can do better as far as my job and its nature.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

Sharing is not a problem.  I am however very cognizant of the fact that I tend to give far more than I receive as far as emotional investment and that has some real dangers for me. I suppose this virtue needs a closer look as far as specifics and safeguards.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

How I deal with others is an important consideration in life. For me, this is always about letting people be as free as possible and showing my value to them in working hard for myself and not thinking the answers to my problems are to leach off them. But also to be willing to help when help is needed is important. Justice isn’t just about righting of wrongs but also has the element of always doing things right the first time.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

Solid.  I need to be more consistent.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Corsair” – Space Tramp – Chapter 6 (MegaTraveller Fan Fiction)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Story:

Captian Junos shook Jeremiah’s Hand for the last time as his captain.   She told him it had been an honor to serve with him and to be his captain.  He, in turn, thanked her for all the training and support she had given him for the last five years.  She was retiring and selling the Regina Strider because the last speculative trade run had not only been very profitable, it had put the last pieces in place for her to retire on Regina, her homeworld.

Jeremiah thought back to the day after the refit was finished and the captain had accounted what was going to happen that next year. Firstly that he was not going to be the pilot or engineer that year.  He was not even going to be the Steward/Medic.  Rather he took the role of navigator/security officer.  Captain Junos had hired a top-notch pilot and engineer and they were not going to need a steward as they were engaged purely in a speculative trade run in very lucrative goods along the border of the Empire.

That’s why the refit of the Regina Strider had also involved installing a weapons turret with a missile launcher. Something that before they left Jeremiah was trained to operate as it would be his responsibility in the event of a pirate attack to use the turret in combat.  In simulations, he was eventually very good at it.

The one problem was that he was a security officer and he realized he had never actually been trained in anything martial.  He began to ask around and discovered that the new engineer had been in the military and has some knowledge of weapons.  Jeremiah asked if he would train him and the engineer, a rough middle-aged man, suggested he learn to use small blades.

There were a lot of reasons for this.  Inside a starship, a battle was going to be close quarters and so distance weapons would be less important.  Secondly, a blade was a solid weapon that on most systems one could still wear openly or concealed for personal protection.  It was easier to learn knife fighting than most other things. The entire trip the engineer trained him in small blades and even though he never had to actually use the skills he had learne, he was good at using them by the end of the trip.

The real test came as they entered a system to refuel at a gas giant.  There was no good starport so they were simply going to top off the fuel tanks and run the onboard purifier.  The process took some days because you had to travel to the gas giant. Doing hyperspace jump in a strong gravity well is dangerous.  So, you then had to travel enough distance away from the gravity well of the gas giant to jump all the while letting the purifier refine the fuel.

They were approaching the gas giant when the corsair starship appeared. Hails did no good as it was clear that the pirates intended to disabling the Regina Strider and boarding her. Jeremiah activated the missile launcher and after getting a target lock fired a salvo of three missiles.  The corsair had not expected a merchant ship with teeth but continued to pursue despite the missiles. Jeremiah guided the three missiles and used his skill to make them come in from three directions.

The Pilot maneuvered their ship to be evasive and Captian Juros showed a little knowledge of ship tactics.  The end result was the pirate ship was hit twice but did manage to hit the Strider with its own beam weapons which disabled the maneuver drive. The corsair, however, must have been gravely damaged as it broke off and disengaged. limping back the way it came. Jeremiah sent a couple missles after it to keep it moving away.

The engineer and the rest of the crew of Strider went to work getting the maneuver drive back up and running and succeeded in a few hours. With the corsair nowhere on the sensors, they fueled up and headed to the jump point. The hyperspace jump was a welcome relief as everyone was on edge thinking the corsair would reappear, but it never did.

A couple jumps later they were back on Regina.  The cargo they brought had done far better than expected. Jeremiah was given a large bonus and Captian Junos announced her retirement.  As it turned out the pilot and engineer were old friends of hers who had over the years invested in her ship.  All of them were going to retire to very comfortable lives.

All of them met at The Naked Gypsy for a combination of celebrations.  Captain Junos’ retirement from the Free Traders was well celebrated by many free trader captains. But also Jeremiah had passed his 2nd Officer exam and had been promoted. Captain Junos said it was fitting that as she was going out, a bright star of the future was rising.  She was very proud of the man he had become and even said so. She was glad that she had taken a chance on a young man from Strouden those five years ago.

Eventually, the celebrations died down and Captian Junos said goodbye to him.  She had a ship to put up for sale and then was traveling to another city on Regina where she had purchased a home. She did something he didn’t expect while telling him if he ever needed her help with something to not hesitate to call her; she kissed him.  Gently and with a lot of motherly love, something that Jeremiah had never experienced in truth until then.  He watched her leave with a large sadness in his heart.

The rest of the evening he sat at the bar and pondered his next move. His possessions were in a duffle bag at his feet and everything else was on his person. It seemed strange to not have the Strider to go back to as it had been his home for five years.  He had learned a lot these last five years and now it was time to put that to the test in finding a new ship and captain to serve. He was wondering what challenges were in store for him next.

He downed his last drink and then gathered his duffle bag over his shoulder.  He was a Spacer and he would land on his feet.  In the meantime, it was time for some companionship of the female variety, so he headed upstairs to the brothel.

Megatraveler Notes:

Free Trader 3rd Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O2 – 3rd Officer   Terms Served: 1

UPP: A67A74   Age: 22  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 1, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Handgun – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 3 

Year Five:

Roll for position availability: 8+ 1 for Intelligence = 9  – position available.

Roll for assignment: 9 + 1 for Social 5- = 10 – Speculative Trade

Survival Roll: 5 – survives (barely -again),

Skill Roll: 5 – Skill acquired.

Bonus: 9 – Bonus – roll: 6 muster out table: 50,000 Cr / 2 = 25000 Cr. bonus.

Promotion: 8 – Promoted to 2nd Officer

Roll for Skills: ( 1 fo skill roll/ 1 for promotion): Shipboard Life Table: Blade Combat Cascade: picks Small Blade – 1, Free Trader Service Table: 5 – Space Combat Cascade: Picks Gunnery Cascade: picks Turret Weapons -1

1 Brownie Point for promotion:

MegaTraveller Shorthand

Free Trader 2rd Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O3 – 2nd Officer   Terms Served: 1

UPP: A67A74   Age: 23  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 1, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Handgun – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 4, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Economics and Common Sense” – Of Wolves and Ravens – Economics

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Discussion

Having a minor in economics apparently puts me above the common man who has an opinion about economic matters. It does, however, add to my frustration level as Rothbard’s quote resonates with my soul quite a bit.  I find a few things frustrating about people’s ignorance of economics.  Mostly how this ignorance is used against them.

Economics is part of my overall philosophy because some of my virtues are connected to business: Self-Reliance, Industriousness, and Hospitality all of more direct economic issues so knowing something about how economics actually works helps me have more for my ravens to say about those decisions involving those virtues.

Because of the law of scarcity, for instance, I know that there are some things in life not available to everyone, so if you want them you have to earn them.  It gets rid of a sense of entitlement which, to be honest, is one of the most detrimental things a person can have as part of their personality makeup.  Economics is often called codified common sense and so it is a valuable tool in my philosophical toolbox.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Needs (Geri):

I suppose my need for economic knowledge in relation to philosophy surfaced with some of my decisions when I first went back to school and decided on my major. I knew I wanted something that was in demand and marketable but also flexible.  The one thing I had noted over the years, as technology and knowledge change, so does how business is done and those who can adapt thrive.    The need for flexibility and marketability long term was an issue of the Law of Demand.

Wants (Freki):

On the flip side, the kind of job I wanted is an issue of the Law of Supply.  What’s available. was an issue.  The thing was that Political Science opens that up by one simple thing – I could always be in administration and that is everywhere. Not to mention that just having a Bachelor’s degree from a university that is real-world instead the plastic bubble of religion opens up even more.

Reason (Huginn):

So my current struggles beg the question of which law deals with the fact that I am struggling to find a job and the economics of hidden costs and unintended consequences of economic policies might be a factor. the simply truth is that if someone hires me that has a good benefits package my being older is going to cost them more money even if that benefit is simple health insurance, the premium for me will automatically be higher.

Wisdom (Muninn):

This leads to the wisdom that I need to be ready to give up some raw salary to compensate for that.  It is something I will give up because I would still come out ahead of where I am now. Economics helps me realize that flexibility is called for.

Conclusion:

Personally, economics being part of my overall philosophy has been something that has had a calming effect.  I don’t get bent out of shape when an employer does certain things but I rather ask what the economic issue might be.  Sometimes I have to ask why they don’t consider economics but people are people so they don’t always have economic knowledge and that includes people in charge.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“A Strong Foundation” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Journal Entry:

This week we return to the beginning and talk ao but Virtues; particularly the virtues of The Nine Noble Virtues of Asatru and the Higher Virtues. In my own philosophy, I have broken these down into three groups of the virtues each with their own corresponding higher virtue. This is my conceptualization and other followers of Asatru might do it differently.

The first group for me is what I call the foundational virtues: Honor, Courage, and Truth with the corresponding higher virtue of Love. For me, this is symbolized by the bottom triangle of the Vulknut.  It is about the part of my philosophy that is foundational in the sense it deals with everything and all situations. These are the virtues that form the bedrock of my philosophy.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

Honor is not just a word to me.  I do find the struggle interesting of being an honorable person is a modern world that seems not to have any at all at times. Having a feeling of inner value and worth seems to be constantly challenged. My foundational drive is to have that sense fo honor. I also seke to recognize and praise the honorable. Honor is a tricky and difficult virtue, probably the most difficult.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

Doing what is right is not always easy to figure out.  Once I do I have gotten much better at acting on what is right but it still is the question of what is right?  That takes some time to figure out and honestly, my track record tells me I take too long at that part of it. I am getting better because time is something important to me and wasting time trying to make decisions that ate perfectly right is not ultimately productive.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Learn Latin by March 31st, 2021 to the point I can take a test and show my self proficient.

It takes a while to get real shit (truth) form me because I don’t just give that out to anyone. I prefer silence when it comes to the truth to most other people.  Most people don’t want the truth anyway, they want comforting lies.  The more real issue to me is remaining truthful with myself.  It helps that I now see this as a loving act toward myself to be truthful.

Higher Virtue: Love:

Honor, Courage, and Truth coem together to form the foundation of love.  That leads to one aspect that I now struggle with which is creativity.  For me, my muse has always flown from something or somebody I have loved.  For whatever reason, when I have a certain type of love for someone it is the best kind of foundation for creative work. For me writing, in particular, is fueled by this kind fo love. my best times of writing and most productive is where I have had someone I loved very deeply and it flowed to my fingers and out on to digital paper.

The frustrating thing is this has never worked with my family, even my wife.  I wonder sometimes if this is because certain love is expected and not just freely offered.  I know my most productive time of creativity was Feb 2018 to July 2018 but that was Miss Salty and that also had some serious downsides in the end.  Now, I just search for a new muse and I wonder who or what I have to love to find her.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  2. Meditation – 3 min.
  3. Check Communications and Email.
  4. Paper Journal: Create a Daily Log and To-Do List.
  5. Stretching / Yoga
  6. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

Solid, working more on consistency at all levels.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Heimdall – Guardian of Bifrost Bridge” (Asatru – Part 11) – The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Sol’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not given to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: ‘Heimdall” – Nordic Folk Music:

Meditation:

Image may contain: one or more people, people sitting and text

Never, ever stop learning.

Text:

See the source image

If you want more details about Asatru, I can’t recommend this book enough.

Sermon: 

I remember that my introduction to Norse mythology as a child actually started with Heimdall and actually the book above also when it starts looking at the Norse gods of Asatru also starts with Heimdall. Heimdall is the god that guards the way to Asgard – The Bifrost Bridge. The rainbow bridge that connects Asgard to Midgard.

Heimdall is the god of light, guardians, the coast as he is the product of Odin and the nine waves of the sea.  He lives in his fortress above the entrance to Asgard.  He has a sword and a horse.  Most notably he is the god which is considered the most benevolent to mankind as he is involved with them.

The image one might get of Heimdall is a man who sits and guards the bridge day after day but in fact, he seems to travel a bit and be very involved in mankind’s plights.  It is also believed by scholars that he was once more important that he seems to be today.  The Norse people held him in high regard as he was said to be the father of many human children so it was said he was an ancestor to many.  I remember when I watched Vikings the TV show it was this idea that was invoked when a man and woman were having a dispute about her child because it seemed the child was not the product of their marriage but the visist of a stranger. The ruling woman made the judgment the child was the child fo Heimdall and thus the family was blessed.

The followers of Asatru do have high regard for Heimdall despite the fact his role with the gods is slight.  Basically waiting to blow his horn to signal the attack of the giants during Ragnorak on Asgard and then to guard Bifrost with his life. This vigilance and connection with mankind in the rainbow, the coast and the ridges above the seas is however ever-present.  Something that is to be admired.

I am reminded that not all virtue is glamorous. There is nothing more boring and yet so necessary as guard duty.  Heimdall for his part takes on his task of guarding Asgard and the Bifrost bridge with a sense of fidelity and discipline that few can match. His story definitely also has the connection to humanity that is truly personal as he is the ancestor of many.  I find it interesting that the Norse people had no problem with the fact that he seems to have no wife yet fathers human children and they considered themselves blessed for it.  Despite what we do know there is still a lot of mystery to Heimdall which I find intriguing. Mostly his personality seems interesting but he so quiet he reveals little and his name’s meaning is unknown.  I connect with him however as his job as the guardian of Asgard connects to my first name Edward very well – ‘The guardian of prosperity’ seems to fit us both.

Parting Thought:

Image may contain: one or more people and text

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Music – My Meaning Between Words (or How to Know the Real Me) ” – The Skald’s Lyre

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

 

 

Happy Sif’s Day

Discussion: 

It has been a while since I have discussed music and its relationship to my life.  I guess I would describe music as my meaning between words.  I don’t actually perform music but have an uncanny ability to be listening to something and feeling what the artist is feeling very strongly.  This also has to lead to sometimes shutting a song off and moving on because it is not what I actually feel, because it doesn’t resonate. When it does, then it becomes my meaning between words.

I guess the best way to show how important this is to tell you how you get to know the real me.

  1. Firstly don’t expect me to jump up and down if you meet me.  My trust level is pretty low of new people because of many painful experiences so I will speak in two languages to you at first – English and profanity (light).  Over time you might graduate to harder profanity (fuck as a root word) and sarcasm. If this offends you were are done; if not then, this means I like you. It doesn’t mean we are friends, just I like you.  If I add my fourth language – real shit, then you have become a 1st level friend.  That’s it, don’t expect a huge fanfare about it.
  2. If you want more than that, it is on you.  Sorry, introverts have friends because someone came along and adopted them as friends.  I am INFJ so understand my idealism about friendship is higher than the value I place on my relationship with my family. You want to know me better, it’s on you.  I have to see you value friendship with me enough to make some sort of effort to reach out.  Otherwise, as an introvert, I am happy to move along with my own company.  I get along great with myself.  This is the point where understanding me and friendship diverge.  They become two different things.  Friendship with me after this takes time and demonstration in action, not words.  Getting to know me is actually easier and the more you do, the more it speeds up the friendship process.
  3. To understand me completely as in my thoughts and feelings, don’t start with conversations with me, I am guarded as fuck in conversations and evasive as to my feelings and thoughts in that context.  It takes a long time for me to open up to someone in conversation. First impressions of me are often off by quite a bit because I would just as soon move on from your presence as talk to you. If you meet me don’t think you know me. Observation and conversation will get you about 15-20 percent of the real me and only the parts I allow people to see.
  4. Read what I write. INFJs pick an artistic outlet to express real thoughts and feelings and mine is writing.  This blog is right now my main expression of thoughts and feelings and a person who reads this blog will get another 40-60% of me depending on whether or not you also know me where I live.  I am pretty transparent here on The Grey Wayfarer so minimum if you live somewhere else in the world you would know about 40% of the real me by reading it.  If you know me personally and read this blog you are going to get about 60-65% of me.  The real me.
  5. Ask what music I am listening to.  This will give you an additional 10-15% because no matter what you learn from observing me and reading my writing, this fills a lot of the gaps.  There are thoughts and feelings I cannot put into words but if you listen to the music I am listening to, you will get a little more of me. that will put you at 70-80% if you know me, read what I write and listen to the music I am listening to as well. At that point, you are on the fast track to becoming a member of my very small inner circle.
  6. Getting to know the rest of me involves getting in that inner circle and that is where the friendship, and getting to know me, come back together.  Inner circle people get to actually will hear more of the real me in conversations. That’s how you know you have arrived when how I talk to you starts to sounds more like this blog. At some point, you will be at about 90%.
  7. The other ten percent requires a level of intimacy that few achieve. You have either known me for a very long time, are or were my lover at some level, or you are me. My personality is such that even with people I have considered friends all my life and even my wife I keep a few cards close to the vest. Very few get to see them. I would say only one person has gotten close to 100% and she is no longer part of my life except as a ghost.

People ask what about my wife at this point?  My wife is a good woman and loves me very much.  I love her but the struggle in our relationship is that she knows me pretty much by watching me, being my friend for a long period of time and being my lover. She is not a reader and our discussions of music involve musical taste not what we are listening to and why. This means two of the biggest avenues she could get to know me with better she does not utilize.  My personality is such that because of this I get guarded even with her because of this.  Note I am saying is mostly on me there, not her.

You would think after 30 years of marriage, I would be having open conversations with her about everything. Especially since we actually have on top of the length of the relationship, being lovers.  But my INFJ guard is up with everyone including her and that is just how I am.  Getting to know me requires effort, reading my writing and listening to my music.  Otherwise, you could probably get to 80% otherwise at most, which is where sometimes I feel my relationship with my wife is most of the time.  Recent events in the last couple of years still haunt my thoughts about our relationship making me still guarded.  I may have had an affair, but that was symptomatic of many issues that existed in our marriage before that and we are still working through them.

So you can see where music fits as not the most important thing in my life but as something that is important and helpful in understanding me.  Ity makes the difference between having a good understanding of me and a great one.

Playlist:

Wardruna and Aurora – ‘Helvegen’:

Disturbed – ‘Stricken’:

Five Finger Death Punch – ‘Wash It All Away’:

Three songs that resonate with me right now.  Well, the first is representative of pagan music that I listen to and there are a lot of different groups and songs there.  This is just the latest example.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Divine Masculine and Feminine” – Freya’s Chambers – Male-Female Balance

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg And Freya’s Day

Disclaimer:  The topics covered in Freya’s Chambers include serious discussions of sex, sexuality and related issues.  If it isn’t your thing; you can move along, otherwise enjoy and feel free to discuss.

I am fairly new to this and perhaps this is a topic for Odin’s Eye but the sex role and sexually infuse magical concepts are very much what Freya’s Chambers is meant to address.  The pagan concept of the divine masculine and feminine hits pretty much every form of paganism in some form or another.  There are some that focus on one or the other, but usually, they have both.  The idea of masculine and feminine not just being genders but spiritual forces are quite common.

In most mythological pantheons there is a duality of gender when it comes to the simple fact that most gods and goddesses are paired.  There are a husband and a wife and often there is an understanding of the feminine and masculine roles in the divine realms that are conveyed in those pairings.  One of the most common is that rain, thunder, and lightning is often a masculine god, like Thor or Zeus.  The feminine is earth, harvest and giving life, like Sif and Hera. When I was in seminary one of the pairings and mythologies we looked at basically held that the earth was the womb and that rain was semen.

See the source image

In this idea, there is the notion that certain forces of life are masculine based and others are feminine.   That some forces in life contain masculine energy and others feminine.  Also with this is the idea that these two forces need to be kept in balance as much as possible. That when things get out of balance things can go horribly wrong to being just off and not working.

In our modern world, the issues of gender identity, gender roles, etc. seem to defy these views in some respects. Gender identity has become a bugaboo because according to someone can simply choose one’s gender by a decision.  Gender Roles are often questioned and rightly so because in many cases in society one sex’s roles are often put as superior to another.

See the source image

In ancient paganism and mythologies, there is little gender-neutral or gender fluid.  Odin is a man, Frigg a woman.  That doesn’t mean that Odin doesn’t do some things that even in Viking society would be considered feminine – like his ability to use divination magic which is a role that was almost exclusively female. But Freya embraces the masculine when she dons her armor and flies with the valkyrie.  That said, for the most part, Odin and Freya stick with their sex when it comes to what they express spiritually and their role in society.

It should be said that those that believe in the divine masculine and feminine try to remove the negative stereotypes:   Men are aggressive and women passive is a common spiritual theme but that doesn’t mean men are strong and women weak.  Aggressiveness and passivity each have their own strengths and weaknesses so each is required to complement and harmonize with the other.  They need each other.

See the source image

My personal view is presented in the simple idea of male-female balance:

  1. I think self-fulfillment is found first in accepting all you are including if you are male or female. Trying to be something you are not is self-defeating and indicates self-hatred which is not helpful.  So no, I don’t think being gender-neutral or fluid is a good thing or even based in reality.  The genders are not evil but evil can result if they are not balanced. A good way for them to become unbalanced is to deny their existence or ignore them.
  2. It stands to reason that if spirituality exists men and women would have a spirituality that is different from one another.  If we are different physically, emotionally, mentally based on our gender. Then it only stands to reason that we would also be spiritually different based on it as well.
  3. I believe that men are strongly masculine but need a touch of the feminine and visa versa.  I think the yin and yang symbols are the best representation of this and the need for balance.  The dot of the opposite color in each keeps us from the more negative qualities of our gender.

See the source image

I personally have had to adjust a few understandings to come to these conclusions.  One of the great failures of the Abrahamic religions is their failure to lose the patriarchal notion that man is the head of the woman.  That masculine dominates feminine is a central theme to all of them. In the end, this leads to women being everything from property to submissive servants to men.  I am pretty much sure this a great ploy to keep dominance now.  Religion is used to justify men controlling the destiny of women which I would no consider unbalanced and thus doomed to fail. No matter how pleasantly this is put, it is ultimately about the domination of masculine over the feminine.

See the source image

In my personal life this is challenging in my marriage as my wife still, through long experience, habit, and practice, seeks my authority over her. The problem is I don’t look at it this way and tell her to make up her own mind a lot. This can be frustrating for both of us. I am looking for an equal partner who makes decisions together with me now.  She still looks for me to make those decisions alone and she just goes along with them.  I was never a domineering Christian husband, but the teachings of the church in multiple contexts over the decades have created this version of masculinity and femininity that I no longer hold, but she does.  This represents a great difference in our values and does cause strain in our marriage.

Away from marriage, I have accepted my masculine spiritual side as pretty strong.  I also like the feminine and I am attracted to it. I need it as I do not generate a lot of feminine energy within myself.  This could lead to a lot of imbalance, but that is why I probably get along better with the women in my life than men. Their influence keeps me balanced.

See the source image

This is my initial view at present.  I may change it with time as I meditate on it more and refine it.  I do know that this belief in balance is what caused me to gravitate to Asatru rather than Wicca.  I found most, not all, practitioners of Wicca to be very ‘The Goddess’ oriented like masculine forces were bad or inferior.  Men were only a consort to the feminine, not presented as equal.  If patriarchy is bad; I am going to say matriarchy is equally so.  Neither is balanced.

Asatru doesn’t do this but reminds people of the need for both men and women and that both are important. Both the masculine and feminine are equally valued and have their role in society, life, family and sexuality. Neither is a social construct, but spiritual forces created by men and women being men and women. We may be different, but we are both needed and partf o that is to recognize the need for balance between the male and female.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

“Tattooed Thoughts” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

The Bucket list items for self-virtues have a lot to do with heritage, even more so now that I have changed one of them (see below).  Mostly though my thoughts are on the first tattoo that I want.  It is the bucket list item with the highest probability of being fulfilled this year.

I want all my tattoos to reflect both my philosophy and my journey through life.  After my post on Odin’s Eye this week, I know for sure it will be the valknut with rune circle.  I am not sure where yet, but that is going to be it. it will be in a place that can be covered for employment purposes, but when at home it will probably be visible in some way.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

I change the date on this to reflect a more pagan viewpoint of celebrating Beltane.  That night when anything goes will be so for me.  With certain limitations fo course.  This is about embracing heritage more than anything and coupling it with a need for one undisciplined day a year.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

Already talked about this but it does have a time limit, my 51st birthday.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

This is a really long term bucket list item as it is basically still ten years away.  There is just a lot to do and I have a feeling I am going to need all the time I can get to make it happen.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

I know here is wisdom and I am talking about doing undisciplined things and getting a tattoo which some might consider unwise.  Part of wisdom is knowing when to set things aside and enjoy life and mark the milestones you have passed with a little celebration.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Walking – 1 hour.
  5. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  6. Reading – half an hour for enjoyment.

I really see no problems here other than I need to do it.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 3

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“A Fireplace, A Sauna, and A Skinnydip” – Rogue Wizard: The Fire of Fury – Part 13

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

Rogue Wizard’s Journal August 27th, 2019

It’s been a week of hiding out and I think we are all going a little stir crazy. It’s late summer so we don’t have to deal with cabin fever at least.  Yet. The three of us put on more passible civilian clothes to go to town.  Amber in jean shorts and a tank top is something to see.  Unusual to not see her in that red dress.  The town trip was uneventful as the only person who actually saw us was the keeper of the small grocery store.  We bought some fresh milk and meat and some other stuff. I dropped off a magical letter in the post office.  It would only reach my daughter if I died.  Until then it was pretty much unnoticeable.

The cabin looks ordinary enough but Lunette informed me that it had some magical features.  The lights were candles and oil lamps that went on and off with the wave of a hand near them.  The fireplace required no wood but in true fairy-fashion burned magic. It might be late summer but the cabin is shielded buy tall think trees and this is the Upper Penisula or what we Michiganders call ‘true up-north’.  It was starting to get cold at night. So the fireplace was a welcome addition in the evening as the three of us would gather on the couch and talk and watch the flames.

The icebox was also magical.  There was no electric line to the place so it all was magic.  The consequence was no internet or television.  My phone sat inert and its battery quite dead at the bottom of my pack now. Better that way, no way to trace me using it.

The same was true for the sauna by the lake as it was powered by magical rocks that you threw water on to get steam, which did have to be dipped from the lake in a bucket.  There was one of those metal portable tubs hanging from the wall that we had been taking turns in getting a bath.  Well, the girls have as I can’t really fit in it, so I fill it and then sponge bath myself standing in it (with Lunette helping scrub my back) and then pour the bucket of water over my head to rinse off.  Up until three days ago, the pattern was me and Lunette going down and helping each other bathe and sauna together. Then I come up to the cabin and Amber goes down and Lunette helps her. They usually come back together, often after an hour or so.

Three nights ago it was however particularly hot for a lot of reasons.  One was the night temperature didn’t drop much and it was still late summer heat even at night.  So the whole sauna bath thing was even hotter and I was literally sweating bullet-sized drops.  Lunette being a pixie is less affected by changes in temperature but even she was feeling it I could tell.

“Let’s cool off in the lake. Skinnydip time.”

It kind of brought back memories at my uncle’s cabin when all us cousins would get in the sauna and then do skinny dip time to cool off. We were all little kids so the whole girl boy thing hadn’t really dawned on us yet.

So I saw her get up and followed her perfect naked backside out into the lake and jumped out into it with her.  Soon we were waist-deep. The lake wasn’t dirty at all, in fact, I remarked how clear it was to Lunette and she said her family owned the whole thing.  They called it Mysterious Clear Lake.  But in truth, you will not see it on the map.  Her family had used their abilities of illusion and suggestion to basically make it disappear.  So you could see the sand even in deep water below you and when it was calm it was like a mirror. Tonight the moon was shinning out on it and it was wonderful.  I took Lunette in my arms after splashing each other for a bit.  I kissed her.  After a few seconds though we were interrupted.  It was Amber clearing her throat.

“You two mind if I join you?”

Before I could speak, Lunette said no we didn’t.

“Oh, thanks.  It’s pretty hot in the cabin.”

I was about to speak when Lunette pulled me close and whispered in my ear.

“It’s OK.  Were all adults here and I would like to know where she stands with you. Her being naked means she doesn’t have anything up her sleeve.  Gods Ed, I am still a pixie about this, I don’t own your sexuality.”

I nodded, but my eyes had not left Amber.  She kicked offer sandals and pulled her tank top up over her head.  She undid her bra and dropped it into a pile with her shirt and sandals.  She then unbuttoned her shorts and in one motion dropped them and her panties down to her ankles and then stepped out.  Looking at the front of her, I now knew she was truly a redhead.

‘There, fully disrobed, well except for my tattoo.”

I didn’t have to ask as she turned around and showed us.  Well me, because Lunette had probably seen it before.  It was a tramp stamp but it was flames of red, orange and yellow all mixed beautifully together.  The flames actually moved a bit like they were real.

“Is it magical?”, I asked.

“Oh, yes.  It augments my flame powers.”

Then bold a brass she strode down into the water up to her waist as well.

” I got it from an alchemist tattoo artist who specializes in that sort of thing.”

“Is that common.  I have been thinking about that as well.”

“Yes.  There are quite a few now that tattoos are less taboo with mundanes.  It has the advantage of being a talisman that can’t be removed.  You are pretty powerful already. I am not sure what a tattoo augment would do to your powers.”

I caught myself staring at Amber and then turned to Lunette who was smiling a wry smile.  She leaned over again and whispered.

“You know I think you are part nymph yourself. You need to focus and find out where her loyalties lie.  She is no longer your bodyguard now, so why is she with us still?”

I nodded.

“You know Amber, you don’t have to stay with me anymore.  You are not under orders to guard me anymore?”

“I know.  I could just join the underground and fight, but I feel in a way my place is still with you.  You have a tendency to draw trouble and end up in awkward and tense situations.”

“Yeah, like skinny dipping with two beautiful women.”

This time both women laughed.

I sighed and looked back and forth between the two of them they were both alternating between looking at me and each other.  Then it hit me.

“You girls are up to something. I have been set up haven’t I?”

“I told you, Amber.  He is pretty quick on the uptake when it is staring right at him.”

Amber shrugged then spoke.

“Ed, I have been your bodyguard now for some time.  I have come to care about you in that time like no one else except maybe Lunette.  Things have changed, you are right but something has been building for a while now inside me toward the both of you.  I can only describe it as affection, maybe the beginnings of love. I know my place is with both of you.”

“Ok, this is truly awkward and tense.  Are you saying you love both of us?”, I asked.

“Yes.  I have already expressed this to Lunette.  As a Pixie, I knew she would understand but we both worried about you.”

“Yeah, how you would react, Edward.  I know you just finished mourning your wife nad our relationship is still new.  You have a hard time with this heart stuff, I know. But Amber is still with us because she loves us.  No other reason than she is in love with both of us and doesn’t know any way to express it other than protect us.”

I sighed, “Well, leave it to the women in my life to complicate things. I don’t even know what to think right now. I really am a little more fae in my understandings of these issues now, but it is still all very new to me.”

Lunette spoke, “Edward, we thought about that too.  We don’t want you to rush things.  I know you wouldn’t have that type of relationship or sex with any woman you didn’t have some feeling of love for and my guess is that; true to you; the relationship between you and her has, up until now, been a professional one. She and I want that to change.”

“You both do?”

Lunette sighed, “Yes.  We have been talking.  Edward when you got back with me you said you understood what I was and what that might entail in our relationship.  I am a fae and sexual fidelity is not in the cards and you said that was OK.  That it didn’t affect our loyalty to each other because you knew how I am. Well, you should know that I find it as easy to cuddle up to a girl as a boy. I’m bisexual. Amber and I have…”

“Been getting cuddly.  I see. Ok. I am good with that.  I said I would be and so there it is.  But I am not sure about me and Amber.”

“We know Edward.  That’s why Amber and I felt you should be told this way and then gradually be brought into it. For starters, we want to stop the separate bathing times and bathe and sauna together.  Skinnydip too. It would just be good if we can dress, undress and be naked in each other’s presence without inhibition.  The cabin is just too small for any real privacy anyway. It will lead to more conversation and emotional intimacy if nothing else. There is also a practical concern.”

“Yeah, I know.  When we bathe and sauna separately the one person alone is vulnerable.  We should try to be together as much as possible. Ok. I will go along with this.  I guess we will see how it goes.”

For the last three days, we have been doing the fireplace, sauna and skinnydipping together.  Amber is a redhead and fire mage, but definitely, not a hothead and her passion I can feel is that quiet kind.  I can see her and Lunette sleeping right now from the table where I am writing this journal out by hand. I slept alone last night and let them have a night together. They are both beautiful women both outside and in. While I am still not completely sure about this, I am willing to stay open-minded. After all, life may be very short for us and we need to enjoy as much as we can while it lasts.

Author’s Notes: 

I suppose I have to say that any similarities to the characters and events in this story are purely coincidental with the exception of yours truly. I have to say that because for some reason during The Hedge Wizard of Redburg some people actually thought I was relaying all true stories.  Most of the time I was not.   

When I write fiction of any type I like to push social mores. Hell. I like to slap them in the face, knock them on their ass, and then kick them when their down. The context of this story is that we have a male wizard, a female wizard, and a female pixie.  The two mages already push the social boundaries of this imaginary world by being mages.  A little nudism and sex outside the lines are not going to phase them.  Especially since I have established in past canon (now deleted) that nudity and sometimes sex is necessary for some magic to even work or take place.

Lunette is even further off the chain when it regards sexuality and nudity.  As a fae, she is immune to disease including STDs.  In addition, she cannot get pregnant except with another fae and only if she wishes it. I ask you what kind of social mores about sex would you expect if this was the case in fae society?  None – pretty much other than perhaps incest being taboo, maybe not even that given the fae are also not subject to genetic disease either. The faerie spends more time naked than clothed when among their own kind as well. Needless to say, each faerie and pixie has probably seen a lions share of boobs, asses, and penises regardless of their own sex. Nudity does not phase them. 

In this story, Edward is hunted, a widower and pretty much looks at sex and nudity like a fae, with reasonable precautions relating to human beings.  He can get another female human pregnant without protection and STDs are real things.  But not with Lunette and Amber has a few magical tricks up her sleeve (when she is wearing clothes) regarding her own feminine issues. Edward is very well aware at this time every day could be his last so yeah, he is looking for any bright spot in that situation.    

I am simply extrapolating what would happen in this context given all the above. There is no reality here and I am not relating any real event that happened in my life at all. In real life, I am married and have been (since my wife and I’s reconciliation) faithful to her.  I want that understood before the gossip hounds go off relating this story to everyone.

Yes, I know from my stats on both my Facebook page and here that traffic indicates some people from my former congregation probably still check me out. Oddly enough, I never lost a follower on my author Facebook page last year, but I did lose a lot of facebook friends on my personal page.  Some of you are waiting to run off and tell my wife some story so you can be ‘right’ about me and warn her what an awful person I am.  I am going to say this with all the love in my heart I can muster for you – Go fuck yourself.   

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Dealing with Ghosts” – The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and The Wayfarer – Part 20

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

I suppose it is a testimony to the effectiveness of the last four The Grey and The Wayfarer posts that I really have not had The Grey strong in my life for almost a month, until last week.  The trigger is this poem I have been basically dismissing and setting aside for a month until this last week it started crystalizing fully in my mind and then it became a problem.  It was bad enough for the last ten days or so for me to have a few minor moments with The Grey.  Finally, last Sif’s Day I finalized the poem and published it and I do feel better. Below is the link:

“The Ghost of You” – Skald Tales and Poems – Poem

That said, the ghost of Miss Salty isn’t the only ghost I have been struggling with. I suppose when I look at what ghosts symbolize, it is unfinished business. I have a bit of that but also there is the aspect of someone dead to you either literally or figuratively.  People who for whatever reason are no longer part of your life that still haunt you. Sometimes the haunting is good, sometimes bad.

Probably a good example of each is in order.  The first is my father who died on October 5th, 1994.  He was a great man and his funeral was one of the best attended I have ever seen in my life. Not a week goes by that I don’t think of him still.  I have adapted to his absence but I have never gotten completely used to it.  This time of year both mom and I are a little cranky because of it. The three musketeers (I was an only child) are still missing Porthos. His love of life was infectious and both mom and I have struggled with that ever since his death.

The other kind is best represented by the man known to me as The Dirty Pig.  Probably because the real ghost of that is our friendship which, given all that has happened, was ultimately ghost-like the entire time.  It was illusionary and only remained as long as there was some benefit in it for him.  Real friends can’t be lost so what was revealed was a man who was a poser and a fraud. The Dirty Pig he is to me and will remain so until I am dead.

Sometimes things are also ghosts particularly relationships.  My life as a pastor and my marriage before our almost divorce or both there to haunt me.  The first becomes a ghost because I wasted a lot of time that I could have been enjoying life an building one.  Doing something more useful than being a good storyteller, cut-rate counselor, and spiritual guru. I am now playing a colossal game of catchup when it comes to my finances being prepared for retirement.  I counsel everyone who will listen to me to not go into the ministry.  If you want to help people start a non-profit charity and run it yourself or go into counseling or some form of social work. Be a teacher. Do anything but a preacher or pastor.

My ‘former’ marriage and the combo of my wife and I being a pastor and pastor’s wife is also a ghost that haunts me.  Mostly because inside my heart I am longing for something different now when it comes to my marriage and my wife wants to return to the way things were.  If we stay together, neither of us is going to get what we want and that may still bring about our downfall. I don’t want that but I also don’t want to be miserable like before and so the tension between loving her and loving myself is very real.  It is also not the only thing providing tension.

The other thing is this is now a mixed marriage as far as faith/spirituality and that is particularly stressful to both of us because our values are different now.  They are also diverging more and more. I know if we had gotten divorced, my life would be different and the only thing holding me back with some of my desires is I chose to stay. I know what happened the last time I sacrificed my own happiness to make everyone else happy and it was pretty devastating to all involved.  While I have no desire to have that happen again, I know this is kind of an Achilles’ Heal of mine and I don’t think it has been removed from how I function as a person. It is a ghost that hangs over me.

One other thing besides ghosts to talk about in this The Grey and The Wayfarer.  That is the nature of The Grey itself which might be considered a large ghost if you look at it a certain way.  A bit ago I asked myself the question of what exactly is The Grey?  It is not raw depression that is for sure because I can shut off the negative emotions completely and I would still say I am in The Grey.  Depression is a part of it but not the total of it. There is something else, and I am still thinking about it.  I think though I would need counseling to get to the bottom of it completely.  The one thing I am sure of is that the depressive elements are not the only thing going on here.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!