Self-Reliance

“Grey Revelations?” – The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and The Wayfarer – Part 22

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day. 

The scattered Grey showers continue.  That said, I am getting more of a handle on them.  The triggers are pretty well known by now and I know how to deal with most of them. Mostly, I have been thinking, researching and meditating on what The Grey is?

I don’t know if I am right about this but The Grey seems to be more of a state between feeling nothing and being depressed.  If that makes any sense.  it is a protective state to keep me from feeling the sadness of depression but it still has the element of depression that is ‘loss of interest.  The other quality it has is that I do not give one shit about anyone else.  I am wondering if this is a counter safeguard my mind goes into when I have hit my psychological limit of not taking care of myself and being more concerned about others than myself. So The Grey puts me in a state where I am completely self-centered but not sad; but also restless and bored.  I hope I am wrong because that sounds like a state of mind I wouldn’t wish on even my enemies.  Dangerous and reckless.

I suppose the alternative is to be sad, tired and/or burning angry.

In other news:

  1. I am totally frustrated with the job hunt right now.  No one is even calling me and that is probably the product having lost so many contacts.  Every job I have gotten I have known someone and applying blind is difficult.  If the fuckers at my church hadn’t fired me, I might have had a connection there with someone else to get another job or at least I could put it on my resume as my last job.  It really puts a hole in my resume.  It might be Ok in another year or two but I don’t have a year or two.
  2. Love is frustrating as well.  I have identified that my wife and I have a trust-love but Miss Salty and I had a passion-love.  The problem is I want both. My INFJ idealism kicks in and says why can’t you have a high level of trust and passion in a love relationship. I was thinking about my series Rogue Wizard and there is the same theme. Lunette (passion) / Amber (trust).  It is all over the place with me and having only one or the other just makes it difficult for me inside my head.
  3. Writing seems to be the only solace I have these days. The Blog, my books in their raw form do provide some sense of stability in my head. The other thing is the weights, hiking and getting healthier. There is a part of me that just wants to dive into this and disappear.  My own world in my head is far superior to the real one.
  4. I am still adjusting my thoughts and emotions to my lack of any faith in any god.  I have no imaginary friend to talk to and that is liberating on the one hand but it means a level of self-reliance I have not experienced before and it is scary intoxicating.

I am not fond of the cards I am holding right now. I still am obligated to play the hell out of them though until the next shuffle.  Hopefuly that is soon.  I miss clear skies and having a strong hand.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

 

“Reinventing Myself” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues.

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

You wouldn’t think that reinventing yourself at 50 would be that hard.  I agree with Steve Harvey on the idea that you are never too old to do it, but I also feel like society throws more obstacles in the way of older people doing this than younger ones.

I guess the hardest thing is selling your experience without asking too much for it because you are engaged in a career change.  I just want a better job with better pay.  Not asking for the moon here.  I am hitting crunch time though as the student loan payments are coming soon and it would be nice to not have to do a deferment.

As far as bucket list items in this area, there are a couple changes.  Mostly this is a writer’s bucket list, not a business man’s bucket list and I have one major bucket list change below to reflect that.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To be a published author of at least five books by March 2029

New here, to reflect my change of vocational vision. Writers write for publication so that is where I am heading.  That’s about one book every couple of years minimum.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

No changes and fits now even better.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I still want to own my own home so this stays.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I don’t know if my interaction with others is the same as it was.  I know I have as a goal to treat people in such a way that I would never do to them what I didn’t want to be done to me and I consider that justice.   That said I don’t just forgive anymore – you have to earn that.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

This is the one routine that will stay the same. It works when I do it.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Two Toms, John and Me” – Of Wolves and Ravens – Libertarianism

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Discussion:

Last week the discussion centered around anarchism where I basically stated that I consider it the morally purest and yet most naive idea about government – that is it is best not to have one.  In that post (link), I also stated that the government, if we are going to have one, needs to have certain qualities. This whole idea and the three things I said government needed to have comes direct5ly from my readings of John Locke and the practical application of his principles by two Toms – Thomas Jefferson and Thomas Paine.  These were in my mind the beginnings of practical classical liberalism which sees its incarnation in the United States of the late 18th century.

It is from these men that much fo my own libertarian philosophy is derived from.  Granting people as much freedom as possible is actually a key to prosperity.  I suppose I do look a little romantically toward the founding of my nation and then look at the current state of things a go – what the serious fuck.  The enlightenment founding fathers were probably the first men to really ask the question of how to have an effective but small government with the maximum amount of liberty and actually put what they wanted more or less in place.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Needs (Geri):

Through these gentlemen, I come back to my three things needed to do this:

  1.  Recognizing that the citizens are the boss, the government is the servant, not the master.
  2. Having a great concern to defend the rights of individuals, in fact, it should be made as one of the central duties of government.
  3. The citizens should have the means to overthrow said government if it attempts to violate the two above.

As the anarchist reminds us, we don’t need government, but we are probably going to have one, so what we need is safeguarding against tyranny and totalitarianism.

Wants (Freki):

The kind of government then that we want gives us the three above conditions. It starts with the Idea of ‘We the People’ establishing this government and granting it powers and then limiting them. It makes sure the rights of the citizen are spelled out and gives restrictions and limitations on what the government can do in regard to those rights.  Mostly protect them but not interfere.  It also should protect the means to overthrow the government if it becomes tyrannical.  Weapons stay in the hands of civilians.

Reason (Huginn):

Led by Paine and Jefferson and using Locke’s principles all three were maintained in a constitution that granted powers to the government by consent of the governed.  It created a bill fo rights that the government could not strip from the citizen regardless of democratic action.  One of those rights the right to keep and bear arms for the very event and purpose of revolution against tyranny.

Wisdom (Muninn):

What was created was a very wise government that was small.  The problem is as we go along this constitution and the principles behind it are regarded as a tradition rather than law.  This seems to have the same effect as when the Roman republic began to see its traditions erode and tyranny became more possible.

Much the same is happening in the United States right now as the Constitution must be evoked by those who are willing to back it up with force and there seems to be less and less of those people.  I am not one of them but I am also not an idiot.  No government lasts forever.  But the principles of liberty, life, the pursuit of happiness and property ownership, need to remain regardless.

Conclusion:

As I consider my reading list for next year I am thinking Locke, Paine and Jefferson need to be among them.  I need to apply my libertarian principles and my sense of practicality to the modern issues fo how to maintain freedom in the face of two parties that seem hell-bent on restricting or limiting rights which they have no authority from the people to limit.  Making sure people can act in self-reliance is a worthy quest.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“The Six Remaining Goals” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

I thought it might be helpful to separate out my remaining six goals for some analysis. Mostly to try to put them in some priority order. This is what is left:

  1. Find a new, better paying job by March 2020.
  2. Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.
  3. To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020
  4. To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020
  5. To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.
  6. By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

As  I look at these I now can understand that half of them cannot be fulfilled until March 31st, 2020 itself. The same three simply involve consistency and change until fulfilled.  I just have to keep at it until March 31st, 2020:

  1. To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020
  2. To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020
  3. To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

The other three are more situational and start with the getting of a new and better paying job.  After that, I get the tattoo (bucket list item) and find myself a group to be part of and all six can be very realistically finished by March 31st.

This is very encouraging to me as now I know I can reach these goals with hard work and a little luck.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

All the above said, this is an important goal and the sooner it is crossed off the better. There is a lot of issues that need to be addressed with money and this solves those problems in a solid self-reliant way.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

Goal Achieved

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

This is obviously last on my list as far as a goal.  I need to know where I am going to be long term to know what kind fo group to search for.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Justice as a virtue is not about providing or striving for justice in society.  I have no real control over that so I discarded that a long time ago. It is more about me acting justly with others.  Giving back what I give and not doing to someone what I wouldn’t want to be done to me.  it is about treating my fellow humans as they deserve.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

Nothing wrong with this. Just need to do it more consistently

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Principles and a Call To Action” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

In more simpler terms sometimes you have to get off your ass even when you don’t have a complete plan.  I am learning this more and more every day and it is helpful when you have time that is downtime sometimes you need to think in terms of scenarios and what you would do in this or that situation so if it happens you already havea plan when you don’t have time to plan.

Better yet live your life by virtue nad principle and often what needs to be done and how to do it is self-evident.  I learned this past year that when your world blows up you have to do things that need to be done.  I was vet glad that virtue and principle were my guiding forces otherwise I am fairly sure I would have acted far more self-destructively.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

This is one of those places where my principle to advocate for independence has found a home in libertarianism and following the Non-Aggression Principle as far as my dealing with others and what I consider to be right behavior.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I like working.  I am not really thrilled about my current job.  It’s not that I don’t enjoy the people I work with, they are great.  My issue is that I didn’t spend the last four years getting a degree to do what I am doing now. Have bigger things in mind.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

Don’t have a lot of abundance in my life; we get by and that is about it.  I used to joke last year that I have Coke Zero in the fridge and a couch for you to sit on. Still pretty much true. I would like to do more and that keeps me motivated as well.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Really justice is all about giving people the attitude, time and actions they deserve for their own. I already wrote on this on Mani’s Day so I won’t belabor the point.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

I am thinking a lot about these routines.  I need to think less and act more.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Business: Doing it Right” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

 

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

This group of virtues is called Business using the idea of business in the broadest possible sense of the word.  It is about the relationships I have with others and how I relate to them more than anything. The triangle of the vulknut that represents these to me is the one that is highest up. It has the position then of being the most visible and the most important in relation to dealing with other people.

The three virtues of Self-Reliance, Industriousness, and Hospitality form the virtue of justice.  Justice is a difficult concept to define but it involves treating each person I meet with respect for their freedom and trying to treat them equally and fairly as possible.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

My belief in independence and liberty is an integral part of my views on everything from politics to economics to social issues.  In addition, it is part of my ethics to respect the choices of the freedoms of others. The business of life for me then is predicated on the notion that all my relationships are freewill and for mutual benefit.  They are never to be the product of the use of force, threat or fraud.  This cuts both ways as I won’t tolerate those who try to have a relationship with me using those forces either.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I think I am getting much better at enjoying work for work’s sake and the fact this leads to not being dependent on others for my livelihood is also very satisfying.  As I have said before, however, I think I can do better as far as my job and its nature.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

Sharing is not a problem.  I am however very cognizant of the fact that I tend to give far more than I receive as far as emotional investment and that has some real dangers for me. I suppose this virtue needs a closer look as far as specifics and safeguards.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

How I deal with others is an important consideration in life. For me, this is always about letting people be as free as possible and showing my value to them in working hard for myself and not thinking the answers to my problems are to leach off them. But also to be willing to help when help is needed is important. Justice isn’t just about righting of wrongs but also has the element of always doing things right the first time.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

Solid.  I need to be more consistent.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“A Warm Fire” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

I haven’t quoted the Havamal in a while, but this stanza seem applicable today as I look through my bucket list items this week.  That is kind fo what the bucket list is about you know – “Embracing life without shame”

I talked about minimalism on Mani’s Day and in this regard and my bucket list, the bigger goals make a lot more senes.  I want my own home, but I don’t need it to be big or extravagant – a house in the woods with a fireplace.  Mostly I value a place that is comfortable where I could write, relax and on occasion entertain the few close friends I have. The one thing I value most is privacy when it comes to where I am.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by March 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

Owning my own business someday seme like a faraway dream, but it could very well be that this business could be simply that I am a self-employed writer and that I can keep doing well into old age if I wish. As I reorder goals and bucket list items, I think being a writer first and anything else second. I think about an image of what that means when I am a writer alone someday and I like that image.

I had to change the goal to just reflect the year-long nature of my goals.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

Getting a novel published is one of those bucket list items I have to change very little.  There it is, time to get about writing it.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I want someday to be sitting by a fire in a fireplace, reading a book in a comfortable chair in my own home.  It is really all I need in the end.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

If there is any force of justice in this world, I think all the needless sacrifices I have made over the years as a minister need to be balanced out with a little prosperity. I want to enjoy the rest of my life as best as possible but be just at the same time with others.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

Removed the Latin for now.  I need to think about this more. Everything is good here, I just need to be more disciplined in doing it consistently.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“An Important Singular Goal” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

As I look through all my goals, there is one of them that seems to rise to the top.  A singular goal that is very important – finding a new and better paying job.  This is the reason as a man in his late 40s I went back to school and got another degree.  I now have that degree in hand but not a new job. Yet.

No matter how frustrated I get on this issue I attempt to move forward one step at a time.  The most frustrating thing for me is landing an interview. Once that happens my odds go up tremendously because I can sell myself in person pretty well.

Once I have the new job a lot more things will open up for me.  Other goals will be much more easy to attain.  It comes down to putting the best effort I can toward this goal while at the same time keeping the identity of being a writer first and whatever second.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by September 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

‘By September 2019″ might be very difficult now. But it does show how frustrating this search has been and for how long – since January of this year I have been looking.  I need to take my search nationwide at this point.  I am willing to move anywhere at this point and I need this to happen as soon as possible. I might have to change this to March of 2020 but the goal is important so it needs to happen much sooner than that.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

This goal was finished four months ago, but it stands as a reminder of two things – I can achieve goals I set for myself and that the clock is ticking for the job goal.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

One goal of many that require a new job and more importantly a new location. I just don’t feel very socially comfortable around my home town anymore.  I trusted people here and in this area and when the chips were down, many of them disappeared ot stabbed me.   I need a fresh start in some other place.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I need to shift in my mind, for peace of mind’s sake, from looking for justice for those that have wronged me.  Might not happen for a while if ever.  I need to be thinking of acting justly toward others that I am trying to form new relationships with.  The problem is that I need then is to move and meet some new people to do this with. I just don’t trust anyone where I am anymore.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Language Study: 15 min. on Latin
  7. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  8. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  9. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  10. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

This a solid routine that gets me closer to all my goals.  The writing should be longer each day as I embrace being a writer more and more. The issue with that is learning to take things one step at a time and be patient with it.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Identity and Job Search Frustrations” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

From a job search point of view, this has been a frustrating week.  I think I must have received at least 20 ‘you suck’ emails.  They don’t stop me from applying again for sometimes the same job but the amount this last week was much higher than normal and it is really starting to get to me. I ain’t gonna give up but man it makes the day to day a little difficult.  Probably what makes it worse right now is that I see my friends either with great jobs or getting new better ones and my ministry experience doesn’t seem to count for jack shit in the real world.

Closer to home a promotion at work was basically given to someone outside our department that knows nothing about what we do when there were plenty of people inside the department who were more than qualified. Including me. Makes for frustration at a level right now that creates a possibility of The Grey returning.

I suppose it is also this question of identity as well.  I mean I change my area of looking for a job quite a bit.  One day its business and the next it is the government, after that education.   Right now I would settle for something that just made more money so instead of just surviving we could make some headway toward our goals.

My problem is what am I comes up a lot in regards to career and that is something I cannot shake. I feel the next few years are going to be telling as to whether I make progress or not.  Age is a factor like it or not.  “It’s illegal to discriminate based on age in the United States, Rabyd Skald”. Yes, true, but there is that pile on some Human Resource management people’s desk called ‘too experienced’ or better ‘overqualified’. Just saying.

It all keeps coming back to ‘who am I?”

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by September 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

If there is a place where my virtues and real-life are struggling it is here. Independence is achieved in part through financial independence and I am struggling to get on top of this. I want to do more than get by. I want to be free to pursue what I want to pursue and that requires some financial strength.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

Despite it all I still enjoy working, I just also want to enjoy the work I am doing and know that financially I am working toward something better. Hard work should pay well, it just should. It is this growing feeling of being stuck that I despise, not work itself.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I still try to be helpful when I can though.  I would do more, but I need more to do that. I am not one of those guys who believes in prosperity without charity. To me, abundance has as a goal giving more.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Being hard on yourself is an act of discipline, but there is a fine line into crossing into being unjust toward yourself. In the end, the self virtues are going to come back and help the business virtues.  I just need a win here in Business.  It seems like I lose a lot more than I should here. I want to be just toward myself though and note it isn’t for lack of trying. It would help if the gods or whoever would smile at least with something. But if they don’t listen, to hell with them, I am going forward the best I can.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Language Study: 15 min. on Latin
  7. Reading – 1 chapter min.
  8. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, job search, other actions, etc.
  9. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  10. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

Not much change here other than dropping Latin to 15 minutes and adding reading.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Reestablishing Routine” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

During the last couple of weeks, routine and the discipline that goes with them have not been good.  Mostly, I was struggling just to do what needed to be done for life, let alone doing the things that would improve it. So the rest of this week will be about getting back on the horse of Routine and making sure that they are going forward because they are the keys to stepping one step at a time closer to my goals.

I have maintained a few things and that tells me what is close to becoming a habit or is habit already.  The list there is getting up and doing the get ready for work parts, weightlifting, and blogging. Everything else fell by the wayside. That’s how bad The Grey can get me sometimes. So, I need to make sure everything is caught up and all things are in place and then get back at it.

For the record, last week’s Retrospect posts have in some ways done me good.  I still struggle but my screaming into the wind fo the Grey seems to have at least made me more focused and calm about it.  I am still haunted each day by ghosts but they seem less ‘scary’ to use that analogy.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by September 2019.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company by March 2029.

Independence is the word and it is a good one.  Maybe other people are not cut out for it, but I sure am ready for some.  The only challenges seem to be religious people trying to impose their religion on me, politicians who want to impose their view of how life should be on me and my society who want to impose their views of culture on me.  I think all of them get disappointed when the middle finger comes out.

A lot hinges on getting a new and better paying job, a lot of other goals become more reachable when this happens. In the meantime, my place of employment has a short term opportunity that would be a change which would be helpful in that regard. I have spent the last year basically being a grunt and that has allowed some time to heal and clear my head, but it is time to get back to doing what I do and making money at it. Management and leadership calls.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019 (achieved)

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published by March 2022.

I like working, I don’t always enjoy what my job is. But the virtue and principle of Indusriousness are still pretty much intact.

My novel has a year and a half left but it has to be done by the end of the year period so I can start to see if it is publishable. I might use NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) to get it further down the line as far as being written. November is a good month for that to be honest anyway.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader/participant in a group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

Being compassionate is not difficult for me, I have long practice and experience.  I am just more cautious about who I am compassionate to and how many.

Group is still one of those things that a new job might help with.  Mostly I would like a steady consistent schedule and a place big enough to be part of one.  I could enjoy an existing group too, I am not against that, I just know the new job is going to have to be first.  Homeownership is still in front of me and also hinges on a new job.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Of course, all of this is about acting justly in all situations. To be as ‘fair’ as possible to all parties.  Not an easy task but I have learned that being just with myself is key to the rest. I know I have to do it or things will get worse.

Work Day Routine:

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Weightlifting: Gym time – 1 hour after work.
  5. Writing: Half-Hour on top of the blogging routine each day. Alternate between Non-Fiction Book and Novel.
  6. Language Study: A half-hour on Latin
  7. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, other actions, etc.
  8. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  9. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

I think a few more changes are in order here but not too many. I will see.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!