“Zero-G” – Space Tramp – Chapter 8 (MegaTraveller Fan Fiction)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Story:

As Jeremiah sat down in the barstool of The Naked Gypsy, he remarked how lucky he was to even be there. This past year had brought him closer to death than any other and he was sure if it hadn’t been for some legal wrangling and calling in a favor from Captain Junos he would probably be in prison right now.

That’s what happens he was thinking when you sign aboard a ship simply to get off-world when nothing else is available.  Looking back at t though things seemed legit when he met Captain Cyril Jackson.  He had his crew filled out as far as officers but he needed a second engineer.  The Engineer officer was 1st Officer that specialized in Engineering and so Jeremiah filled the role of Engineer crewman.  The Regina Blue Mule III, a subsidized merchant class vessel, needed two engineers to monitor and maintain its power plant, jump drive and maneuver drives.

As it turned out, The Mule was a bit of a  maintenance problem. Jeremiah actually spent most of the time monitoring the drives and power plant while the chief engineer ran around fixing other systems.  The one thing that kept crashing was the artificial gravity plates which needed an overhaul. it made life interesting as sometimes for hours on end everyone was floating. Jeremiah took it as an opportunity to work on his Zero-G maneuvers and got quite good at moving about without gravity.

The route was speculative to be sure and The Mule could carry a lot of cargo and as it turned out it was cargo that Captain Jackson wanted to move a lot of.  But he also was a smuggler. Something Jeremiah wouldn’t figure out until the third port of call.  He was however under contract, so he shut his mouth and worked his job.  The trouble with this trip really hit a climax on the return leg to Regina when they actually jumped into the Regina system for the final stop. Jeremiah was eager to put this contract behind him, but one major adventure awaited.

One of the system defense ships hailed them and asked them to power down and prepare to be boarded.  Captain Jackson panicked and ordered them to run for it. Jeremiah quickly surmised that there must be something aboard that was contraband.  Not wanting to be implicated he decided to disable the ship in some way.  He wasn’t sure who was with him on this mutiny, but he for one was not going to be on the run from the Imperium.

The Imperium as a general rule does not give two shits about what each system does to govern itself. The Imperium rules the space between the stars and this was definitely something that the local Imperial authorities would take interest in.  Especially since they were carrying passengers both in staterooms and cold sleep. Captain Jackson’s actions were endangering a lot of lives.  Jeremiah decided to act.  He went over to the console that was governing the artificial gravity and basically disabled it.  The Chief Engineer caught on and tried to stop him but Jeremiah had learned how to maneuver in zero-G, so he went behind him and knocked him out with the butt of his blade.

After that, the lack of gravity played to Jeremiah’s advantage.  The medic and steward were too busy dealing with passengers so he got past them and found his way to the bridge. Captain Jackson was arguing with his bridge officer when he broke in and with a single swipe of his blade floating between them he killed the captain by slicing his neck.  Blood hung weightless in the air as Captian Jackson died.  The bridge officer surrendered,  powered down the rest of the ship, and announced to the Regina system ship their surrender.

This last week had been one fo being arrested by the system authorities and sitting in a cell waiting for processing.  There was some talk of stripping them all of their Free Trader credentials, so Jeremiah placed a call to Captain Juros and an hour later he was released and told nothing would be done to him.  He then started to shake, as it had been the first time he had killed anyone.  He was hoping Jackson’s family wouldn’t be after him until he learned that he had no family left alive.  The Mule would be towed back to port and put up for auction by the bank that supported the loan.

He arrived at The Naked Gypsy and had the first of many drinks. He realized how lucky he was as he could have been killed a couple of times. One more year and this second term would be over. He made a mental note to do more research on any captain before signing on with them. The image of his blade going across Jackson’s neck was still with him, but he slowly realized it was the only way.  Jackson had been armed with a gun and he had to take him down and he used his new skill in Zero-G to do so.

He pulled up the menu for the brothel upstairs. He found a girl he wanted but she had appointments for the next hour.  He paid upfront and reserved her for after that.  Right now, he would be content to nurse a couple more drinks. Hopefully, this next year would be a little more peaceful.

Megatraveler Notes:

Start:

Free Trader 2rd Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O3 – 2nd Officer   Terms Served: 1

UPP: A67A74   Age: 24  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 1, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Streetwise – 1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Handgun – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 4, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

Year Seven:

Roll for position availability: 4 + 1 for Intelligence = 5  – position not available, serves as enlisted

Roll for assignment: 8 + 1 for Social 5- = 9  – Speculative Trade Route

Survival Roll: 4 + 1 Brownie point spent – 5 – Survives barely.

Skill Roll: 8 – Skill acquired.

Bonus: 5 – No Bonus

Roll for Skills: ( 1 for skill roll): Rolls Shipboard Life: 4 – Zero-G Combat – 1

MegaTraveller Shorthand

Free Trader 2rd Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O3 – 2nd Officer   Terms Served: 1

UPP: A67A74   Age: 25  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 1, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Streetwise – 1, Zero-G Combat-1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Handgun – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 3, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Anarchism: Moral but Naively Idealistic” – Of Wolves and Ravens – Political Science

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Discussion:

I want to go on record a saying the philosop[hy behind anarchism is morally pure because it is the only philosophy of government that gets rid of the two things that make government suck the most – control mechanisms and the removal of individual rights. Without a doubt, I do not argue with anarchists that their philosophy is good, just and perfectly thought out.  It is political idealism as its finest.

That said it is so idealistic that it will never happen.  Much life socialism has an idealistic view of economics but fails to account for the economic realities of the law of scarcity and that human beings are motivated by self-interest so taking that way you get a system that limits human achievement, option, and freedom. You basically also will find yourself taking rights from people, not granting them under a socialist system.

Anarchism does something similar – it doesn’t take into account another part of human nature that has evolved in us.  We are inherently tribal.  Tribalism has allowed human beings to band together against common problems or foes as long as the human race has been around.  it is part of our psychological makeup and it is why everyone will never accept anarchy as a form of government. There will always be the state no matter how it is set up.  As soon as people organize and set up a system of dealing with problems or issues, what they set up is ‘government’.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

“Feed the Wolves, but Listen to the Ravens first.”

Needs (Geri):

That said, I think the anarchists should keep advocating anarchy for one simple reason – it keeps us with the realization that the government doesn’t have to be involved in everything.  There is no need for the government but if we are going to have it it should do something we can all mostly agree it should do.  We need if anything, when the government is inevitably set up it, should be constructed in such a way it serves humanity, not the other way around. This is why most governments fail because they make slaves out of the populations under them and the tension for freedom is created that leads to their eventual downfall.

Wants (Freki):

So what we want is a government that serves us by: 1) recognizing that the citizens are the boss, government is the servant, not the master, 2) Having a great concern to defend the rights of individuals, in fact, it should be made as one of the central duties of government, and 3) the citizens should have the means to overthrow said government if it attempts to violate the two above.

Reason (Huginn):

While I can marvel at the ethical purity of anarchism given the above needs and wants, I have become practically a classical liberal libertarian. Not because I think having government isn’t immoral like the anarchist, but because I think it is inevitable that government will exist because of tribalism.  So if the government is rationally inevitable, it stands to reason that we keep it as small as people will allow and with the least amount of power necessary.  So far as I know the level of government of classical liberalism is the smallest that has been in history accepted by people. So it is practically viable and yet also respects individual rights and if done properly protects rights.

Wisdom (Muninn):

Wisdom finds itself in upholding the moral goodness of a particular philosophy but realizing the practical realities of experience and what human beings will actually do or accept. For me, classical liberal philosophy is the best compromise between the.purity of anarchism and the reality of human tribalism.  Anarchism, however, does bring to the wisdom table the constant reminder of trying to find a way to let people live in freedom and without coercion,  Well, at least as much as human tribalism will allow.

Conclusion:

I like anarchists, even when they argue with me about this, but I have also frustrated them by saying I agree that they are morally the purest philosophy I have found in studying political science.  Then the discussion turns practical and they have to concede another point – when have human beings accepted anarchism as anything other than a short transitional time between governments?  They never have.

Next week I hit libertarianism and I will be dealing with classical liberalism or more appropriately why I am one.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Goals and Routine” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Mani’s Day

Journal Entry:

My meditations have been on my routines but I have to go back to my goals and look at the ones I have achieved and asked what part of my routines helped me achieve them.  This really involves a lot of thought about Routines in the sense that they not only have to line up with goals they also have to practically work.  If I don’t do them and they don’t actually help me achieve my goals then they need change.

This last goal that was achieved reminds me of the fact that feelings cannot be a measure of whether you decide to work on your goals.  If I relied on feelings to achieve blogging every day I would have never made it.  Any writer will tell you that you have to sit down and write regardless of feelings. Writer’s block to me is just another mythological excuse.  I had to sit down at my computer and write regardless of feelings and still do as the streak of daily posts continue.

I need to learn to branch this out a little more to other areas like writing my novel and a non-fiction book, and doing the other things writers do – reading.  The fact is the things I do despite feelings I am having good results in and the rest flounders because I let feelings determine if I do them or not.  That needs to change.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

Goal Achieved and that is three out of nine for the year. My thoughts though are this goal is going to be regularly about getting past feelings nad getting habit in my life I need to be a successful writer.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

I’m picturing in my head getting a new job, saving up some money and then getting my tattoo on my shoulder.  This would cross off two goals and a bucket list item off this list.  it is the next real major milestone in the journey and need to get there soon. The job search is also one of those things that need to get past feelings.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Learn Latin by March 31st, 2021 to the point I can take a test and show my self proficient.

In order to write my non-fiction book, writing needs to be every day.  Another place where – “I don’t feel like it’ cannot be present.

Higher Virtue: Love:

If I am going to balance out everything else with love of self, getting past my feelings is the key.  Literally. I need to start putting my feelings to love others in a proper perspective and I need to have some feelings about loving myself that are more developed.  That requires an objective look at feelings – why I have them and what they accomplish. Loving me has become I priority if I am going to move forward with my life and stop these anchors from the past from holding me back.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  2. Meditation – 3 min.
  3. Check Communications and Email.
  4. Paper Journal: Create a Daily Log and To-Do List.
  5. Stretching / Yoga
  6. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

I am starting today looking at every line of my routines and asking questions about what I need to make them work better and more consistently.  For the Morning Routine, the thing that is missing is a meditation altar and I am going to spend some money to make one with some candles, incense and I found a valknut plaque to be a centerpiece. It’s kind of a project that hopefully will make meditation a little more formal and thus effectively done.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Tyr – One-Handed Justice” (Asatru – Part 13) – The Pagan Pulpit

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sol’s Day

Announcements:

We don’t pray here – we figure God, the gods, goddesses, or whatever powers that be either know already, don’t give a fuck, or are busy with more important matters than our petty stuff. We also kind of assume that they expect us to do stuff that we can do for ourselves and that we will do them ourselves and not be lazy. We also believe in being good friends, so we don’t presume on our friendship with the powers that be by asking them all the time for stuff while giving them nothing in return.

We also don’t take an offering here.  We figure the powers that be probably don’t need it.  Let’s be honest, offerings are not given to the divine powers, they are given to an organization to support it.  Just being honest. God, the gods or whatever never sees a dime, farthing or peso of that money; it all goes to the church, mosque or shrine.

Theme Song: “Wolf Totem” – The Hu

I discovered this group that has more of a Mongolian feel but the song is titled ‘Wolf Totem’ which, given Tyr’s one story involves Fenrir the great Wolf, seems fitting.

Lyric Video:

Meditation:
No photo description available.

 

Text:

See the source image

If you want more details about Asatru, I can’t recommend this book enough.

Sermon: 

The god Tyr’s name still lives on every time you say Tuesday.  It is his day and it probably speaks of this god’s importance more than any other than right up there with Odin and Thor. Tyr is much discussion of Tyr’s sphere as it would be simple to say he governs war, truth, and justice but the seems to be a mixing of the three ideas so in truth he may be more the god of trial by combat.  That truth and justice are ultimately played out in martial combat or a trial by combat is what Tyr represents and if there is a god that represents honor, it is Tyr.

Tyr’s appearance in Norse mythology is twofold.  The first is minor in the creation of beer for the gods but it is mentioned that he is the child of giants.  As a spiritual concept, I find this interesting as it seems to be saying that nature’s force has a way of bringing about justice and Tyr is simply a more civilized manifestation of that.

The second and main story that Tyr is known for is the story of Fenrir the Great Wolf.  In that story demonstrates his honor in that he refuses to remove his hand from Fenrir’s mouth and does to get Fenrir to trust the god’s final test of strength with the chain that actually binds Fenrir for Ragnarok.  But before that what strikes me as interesting is he seems to be the only god not afraid of Fenrir.  This actually speaks of the notion some warriors have of honor making one fearless.  Tyr seems to invoke that image in his story rather well.

To the followers of Asatru Tyr, of course, is remembered every Tuesday and his story is one that is repeated to demonstrate courage and honor.  Something that all Asatru followers hold highly given they are two of the Nine Noble Virtues.  I guess I find in the story of Tyr much the same along with the concept of how much are you willing to sacrifice for both victory and honor?  Tyr reminds us all that the price can be very close to home and should not be considered wasted if it leads to a good end.

Tyr is revered by those who seek justice so military and police officers who are Asatru gravitate to him as well as those who seek a balancing of the scales with Christianity.  For myself I find his story inspiring as far as honor and courage.

Hail Tyr, God of Truth, Justice, and War!  God of the Northern Star. Hail! 

Parting Thought:

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I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Scattered Grey Showers” -The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and The Wayfarer – Part 21

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day

Of course in the middle of the triumph of achieving a goal, The Grey would have to make an appearance and the problem is it is not one single thing causing the issue but several scattered showers of shit I would rather not deal with; but there it is.  There have been all kinds of scattered Grey showers this week and I haven’t been able to control them all the time which has led to some sleepless nights and emotions that have been less than happy ones.

It actually started the day after I achieved my one-year blogging goal with the simple thought of – ‘yeah that’s great, but you still don’t have a better job yet.”  I hate moments like that because they seem to take all the joy of succeeding at something away from me in a second. I shell up and just exist. I need a new job it’s true, but blogging every single day without fail is an achievement,  I know and anyone who blogs knows it is. It’s just The Grey has a tendency to crop in after I have a high moment.

If this wasn’t enough, I am working one day and over the speakers, it becomes clear that they have at long last changed the loop of songs to something new.  Cool right?  Except that now twice a day it seems I hear the song I don’t want to hear.  “All of Me” by John Legend.  It’s not that I think it is a bad song, it’s damn skippy good.  It is also connected emotionally to Miss Salty in a very strong way and then the whole memories shit of that relationship comes up and I want to cry.  Yeah, 6’4″ 275 lbs. weightlifter crying at work.  So The Grey kicks in as a protective measure and I try to ignore the song.  But later catch me singing it and thinking about her. What the Fuck?  This is why I avoid this song in the first place, and now I can’t avoid it at times.

So, I finally get a day off and I go to bed the night before and I have a dream. Yeah, it’s about The Dirty Pig.  Nothing big or symbolic just him making fun of me and laughing. Him doing his thing of doing things for his own entertainment and throwing me under the bus to that end. I used to be able to control my dreams a little, but as I grow older that ability seems to be lost. I think I still have enough ability to keep the ‘night terrors’ I used to have a bay.  If they come back, that will not be good.

I wake up and then I had to get up for a bit.  Kind of alarmed my wife as it is unusual for me to let my insomnia get me out of bed. The whole extreme anger thing is high with him.  Hard to control.  But then there is my old friend/enemy – the Grey and I head back to bed and fall asleep.

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My personality type makes me emotionally intelligent.  Sometimes called ’empathic’ and it’s pretty high in me.  The curse is that strong emotions in others or in songs or from my past experiences get supercharged because of it.   The Grey has developed in me as a counter to that. When things get too negatively strong, it kicks in to keep me sane. Cool huh?  But the downside is I don’t give a shit about anyone else in those moments.  I have also noted that The Grey occurs more frequently when I am not taking care of myself as far as self-love.  Loving myself keeps the emotional balance better, but I have to really work at that as it is much more natural to help other people than myself.

The other defense is introversion, but that isn’t good for me either.  Part of self-love is receiving love and you can’t do that by yourself.  This what led to the problems of last year.  My wife was penciling me into her busy schedule and I wasn’t a priority.  The church was taking a lot out of me and not giving much back in terms of emotional support and school wasn’t the outlet for my attention like it had been.  Along comes Miss Salty who absolutely understood this and BAM – affair, breakup, getting fired, near divorce, life turned upside down.

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The problem is I am absolutely terrified of letting someone else in right now.  Miss Salty leaving me and The Dirty Pig betraying my trust and leading the other friends I had at the church to fire me have all given me current trust issues off the chart at times. I function all right with people, but let them into my life to love and be loved by them? – yeah, no thanks.  Got my family, a couple close friends and that is it.  My wife helps a lot, but we both have to work and she is extroverted so she has to get away from the apartment or she would go nuts.  That leaves me alone.

The other downside is I get along better with women than men.  Men are comrades in arms but it takes a self-confident guy to be a friend that I trust..  I always feel men are competing with me rather than trying to be a friend. If you are that insecure, yeah, I don’t like you; because I know you’re going to brag about shit in front of me and I don’t do that.  I don’t need to because I am pretty secure in my masculinity.  I don’t have to prove my manhood to anybody.  Only one other guy on the planet gets that right now and that is why we are best friends.  Most men can’t handle that so they shy away for me or our relationship is the joking sarcasm of guys doing the same job and dealing with the same shit.

So women are easier to get along with for me. You can imagine how this is a downside. Today in the western world, 1) showing a woman some attention, 2) understanding her emotions and 3) being self-confident in your own masculinity equals flirting. Like, it comes naturally to me and that has lead to being flirted with back in return more than once.  Pre-affair this was just fun and a way to play around that broke up the monotony of life.  Women made my life more bearable with this flirting with boundaries thing.

Post-affair?  You draw your own conclusions but I have some women now that it is purely professional much like I act with guys.  But my natural tendencies are still there and so subtle I don’t often realize I am doing it.  Getting close to another woman as a friend is just difficult and undesirable given recent events.

So, I am left with my one friend who lives far away who thankfully calls me every few days to check on me and my wife.  My wife and I get along and she now very much understands that you can’t just pencil me in to be my lover/friend.  I have to be much higher on the priority list than that because I am high maintenance when it comes to internal emotions.

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That’s the bitch about being INFJ.  Perfect personality my ass.  Yeah, from an external point of view, we function and don’t appear to need human interaction as much, we navigate emotional situations well outwardly and get along pretty much with anybody.  The price tag of those positives is high internal emotional costs. We pay every part of that cost ourselves for the benefits others enjoy.  No human is strong enough to take that all the time and so the trade-offs are: 1) We disappear for a while, 2) it gets to a point of overload, so we develop coping mechanisms (aka for me The Grey) or 3) Eventually we explode and do something tremendously stupid or risky.  It’s a ticking time bomb that needs to have minutes added to the clock by #1 and 2 or #3 is inevitable.

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On top of it all, today (October 5th, 2019) is the 25th anniversary of my father’s death. Yeah, that always is a grey shower no matter what I do.  I still miss him.

But I keep walking. Ravens on my shoulder and wolves at my feet. My coat and cloak pulled tight against the storm.  No rest for the weary or the wicked.  The showers will eventually end and I will be that much stronger for walking through them.

Still Walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Polyamory” – Freya’s Chambers – Sexual Orientation

/ Ed Raby Sr / 1 Comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Disclaimer:  The topics covered in Freya’s Chambers include serious discussions of sex, sexuality and related issues.  If it isn’t your thing; you can move along, otherwise enjoy and feel free to discuss.  Given the nature of some subjects be prepared for nude images as there may be some.  I avoid genitalia as a general rule but is not always possible.  

Discussion:

Polyamory is an interesting topic because it calls into question the need for societal mores in relationship to romance and sex. I have looked at the subjects of polygamy in the Bible and other related issues and came to the conclusion that from a Biblical point of view as long as everyone was in a marriage relationship and there was no homosexual activity, the Bible allowed for it. But now that I would say the Bible is out and I am looking for a more rational viewpoint of romance and relationships in sexual content.  Along these lines there are only three considerations: 1) Is is consensual, 2) have reasonable precautions been implemented, 3) Are the people involved emotionally and mentally mature enough to handle the relationship.  See the source image

Polyamory is pretty much about the consensual sex and romance with multiple partners.  Unlike many relationships that are multi individual in nature, this is out in the open and everyone agrees to it.  There is no ignorance and no one is being forced to be a part of it and no one is being placed in a position where they have to hide anything. It is really the way freedom should be in that there are no restrictions and no secrets. Polyamory passes the first test as that is the point of it – multiple consensual relationships without secrets.

The second issue is that of reasonable precautions being taken.  The two main issues are STDs and pregnancy.  In reading a majority of practitioners of polyamorous relationships the STD question is part of the reason they desire openness as far as no secrets and this means everyone gets to talk about it and when someone new is brought in they have a lot of questions and those in such relationship tend to stay in a prescribed circle because it is more than just them they are protecting.  In any case, the whole point is to establish a boundary and stay within it even though the relationship is polyamorous.  Letting someone in that boundary is a group decision and that’s a pretty effective protection against STDs.

See the source image

In the case of pregnancy what you read is pretty much either the whole group takes responsibility for the children if they happen or everyone agrees it is group decision as well to open up the possibility if one of the girls wants to get pregnant.  Until then the girl needs to be responsible for her own reproductive system and quite frankly in the modern western world, there is really no excuse for an unwanted pregnancy anymore.  There really isn’t and that means the statement “My body; my choice” comes with the counter – “Your choice, your responsibility.”  In any case, from the standpoint of polyamory, this is another group discussion.

If you are starting to get the idea that communication has to be very high in these kinds o relaitonships I would say ‘correct’.  It shows people in such relationships have to meet the final criteria of being emotionally mature enough to handle the fact that you are loved by many and love many.  Jealousy, control, and envy can’t really be present. You have to be happy when you are being loved by someone and when they love someone else. You have to love the love you receive and get and are also loving enough to let others love each other.

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More directly, you have to be Ok with the fact that the guy or gall you had sex with that night could be having sex with someone else in the relationship that morning.  While you could make love to another person that same morning. The sexual options are one of the main reasons that people get in these relationships and most of the polyamorous writers I have read don’t believe that humans are naturally monogamous.  That reality accepted they simply are being honest in the relationship they have entered.

I put this under sexual orientation for the simple reason that is it possible that some people are sexually oriented to be open lovers?  To be people who can love many people and make love to many people without being possessive or close-minded or even manipulative?  Is it possible that one sexual orientation is a ‘natural lover’?  I have to think it is possible and I can’t see any reason to think evil of such people because of it.

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I guess the honesty of this type of relationship is a step up by quite a bit from the sneaking around and cheating that is also polyamorous but no one but the cheater is aware of it. That is far more dangerous and disastrous than a group of people who say ‘let’s just set all the secrecy aside and be open about the fact all of us love more than one person here’.  It is the consent and agreement to the simple idea that some people are romantically and sexually capable of loving more than one person at once, and that is entirely OK and you don’t have to stop doing it.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Stronger” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

I suppose being weightlifter gives you some insight into personal strength and where it really comes from.  Physical strength building is easy to conceive, harder to execute because it requires a long term commitment and routine.  In my opinion, it takes much more versatility to think in terms of strength than endurance.  Endurance for me has always been a matter of the will or persevering through it.  Strength requires looking at every angle and figuring out every single aspect of yourself that needs to be trained to get stronger.

In weightlifting, this means you can’t just work one muscle to get stronger.  A deadlift is a good example requires as it requires the entire leg muscles, the lower back and a little of the rest as far as to pull.  Support lifts that strengthen these areas individually are required so when you do them as a whole you have overall strength improvement.

Strength of mind, heart, and spirit are much the same, there isn’t just one thing to it.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To be following a full Paleo Diet by March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April 30th, 2020 – Beltane.

I really need to look at things in am ore disciplined manner andperhaps it is time to apply a little minimalism to the whole of my life and eliminate some things I do so I can be more disciplined on a smaller group of things. Refocusing my time on writing and reading seems like a good place to start.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

Getting up is no problem, training to be strong so you don’t get knocked down in the first place is its own form of perseverance. I need to work on that.

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation (achieved)

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

Being loyal, I ask sometimes what that means.  It is a simple principle to be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.  The real circular problem is being loyal to myself so I can be loyal to myself.  I don’t know all the repercussions of that, but I am thinking about it.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom:

I need to focus on simple strengths.  I need the wisdom of making things minimal and simple again.  Time to pair down things in my life a bit to make room for the things that build strength.

Rest Day Routine: 

  1. Morning Routine
  2. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  3. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  4. Walking – 1 hour.
  5. Cleaning – varies but one room of the apartment at least.
  6. Reading – half an hour for enjoyment.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 4

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019
  3. Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation – June 2019
  4. Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

Well, number four is added with the blog reaching a year old.  That is four since I started this journey and three since April 1st.  There are six left from now until March 31st.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Wolfsbane” – Rogue Wizard – The Fire of Fury – Part 15

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

Rogue Wizards Journal – September 7th, 2019

Amber definitely has lycanthropy and Lunette and I have been debating what to do.  I hope the ‘cure’ I just tried with Amber works but it is probably going to take a couple days to know for sure. But I am getting ahead of myself and should take this in order.

Amber displayed the restless sleep and the rapidly dilating pupils on the first day.  She woke up screaming the second night.  Then I knew she had it as I have been there.  Lunette for her part at that point created a magical potion from Wolfsbane that is supposed to slow the progress of the disease but the inevitable march would come so the three of us one day sat down to debate what to do.

The first thing we talked about was not Amber’s disease, but the possibility of a werewolf pack being around.  We continued our routine as much as possible including the skinny dipping but we were now much more watchful and we did it earlier during the day saving night time for discussion time.

I set up some wards on the cabin and sauna shed and the path between the two. they would give me a warning buzz in my head if anything got too close. Skinny dipping in daylight would have been interesting but it was now more about a quick cool off before retiring quickly to the cabin.  Our relaxing time had been interrupted by actual danger and that had us all on edge.

Last night we talked about what to do about Amber’s developing lycanthropy.  She, of course, did not want to be a werewolf despite the power.  You slowly but inevitably go feral and there are only a couple cures. The one used on me required killing a werewolf draining its blood and the magical power of Mrs. W. who used both healing and mental magic on me to affect the cure which involved bathing in the blood of the werewolf. The whole ritual died when she did, so that was out.

This, of course, brought out all the other known cures real or legendary.  One of note involved a ritual of wolfsbane potions and a magical altar that reputedly a mage had built for the express purpose of curing lycanthropy. No one knew if it was even real.  Some healing mages of the past and developed enough power to cure it but that was legendary.  Most of the rest were dreams of desperation.

In the end, the discussion turned to me and my antibodies. Mostly how we could use them to cure Amber.  I wasn’t sure how that could happen.  Mrs. W. and I never talked about this and I had always assumed that it was because it was irrelevant, but I had to now consider the possibility that had I been brought forward to cure others it would have tipped people off to my existence a long time ago and that boys and girls would have led to my death.

Now though that the Council was very well aware of my existence, it seemed that this discussion would have been helped if I had approached people with healing magic and asked but I never thought to do so.

How does one normally transfer antibodies from one person to another? Well, you can make a serum from the blood.  But that requires a lab and in this case, a full alchemy lab which we didn’t have access to and would take a lot of energy and time which might reveal where we were. Amber wouldn’t hear of it. Transfusion?  There were other issues most notably biological blood type but more importantly for us, the equipment we didn’t have.

Suddenly Lunette laughed. Amber and I raised eyebrows and watched her for a minute as she chuckled endlessly, then she spoke.

“Fluid transfer, that’s all we need.”

“Ok, Lunette what are you getting at?”  Besides the fact, Amber and I think you have just lost it.”

“Remember when you almost died Edward from that poison blade? How did we cure you?”

“How could I forget?  I lost my virginity and learned to supercharge my healing powers at the same time. Well basically I had sex with you, that’s also how you got those wings of yours.”

“Yep, but the sexual exchange is what did it.  It is the only thing inherently magical about what humans and in particular mages do.  Sexual magic is the key to making it work.  You just need to use it to transfer the antibodies to Amber and you can do it through a combination of magic and sex.

“Now…”

But my voice trailed off as I saw Amber’s eyes.  She had that look on her face where she felt excited but awkward at the same time.  She knew I wanted to take that part of our relationship a little slower. At the same time, she was afraid of what was happening to her and she wanted to make love to me a long time ago.

“Ok. how does that work exactly?”

Lunette explained that the antibodies were magical in nature and that they would be present in all my bodily fluids. The trick would be to get them to magically jump from me to Amber.  This would require natural magical energy and both Amber and myself to focus on what healing skill we had through it.

“Basically Edward you have to do what you did back then and Amber has to open herself up to the transfer with her own healing magic. The sexual act provides the energy boost and the means of transfer. Sexual healing at its finest.”

I had to admit her logic was sound.  I had gone over again and again about how I had not died that time so long ago and it came down to the supercharged nature of the sexual exchange between fairies and mages.  It saved my life and gave Lunette new wings.  The old pink and light purple ones had been ripped off by Elpis.  They had been replaced by these black and dark purple ones and I had a hand in that.

I got up and moved closer to Amber.

“A long time ago, I resisted what Lunette is talking about.  I tried everything else and in the end, it didn’t;t matter.  Practical sexual magic won the day and healed us both.  I am alive because of it.  Now, here you are Amber and my feelings of love for you are brand new. You also have a horrible disease that right now is just beginning to take hold of you.  It is weak and my temptation is to try some other way because it is weak, but every time I do that I regret just going full-on and getting it over with. So, if you think it is worth a try my love, I am willing to try as well.  I mean I am not asking you to do anything horrible but it might be for nothing.  I just wanted more time to get to know you better before we did this.”

“Oh, Edward… I have wanted to make love to you for a couple months.  It’s not me that I worry about.  It’s rushing you.  I love you too much to do that, but I don’t want to be a werewolf either and this does make a lot of sense.  It’s rushing you that doesn’t sit well with me.”

I nodded.  Then I stood up.  And put out my hand.  She took it and I led her into the bedroom with the double bed. No door but I slid the curtain across the doorway and I head Lunette leave the cabin. I took Amber in my arms.

“Gentle, I still am a little sore from my wounds”, she remarked.

“Absolutely, gentle and loving, my love.”

I am not the kind of guy who kisses (or has sex with a girl) and tells.  So, no details other than I am now sitting here in the early morning. looking at her naked body laying in the middle of the bed.  As soon as I finish this entry, I am going to cuddle back up with her and wake her up in a style more befitting a lover.

I hoped this worked.  Lunette is in the other room sleeping on the single bed.  She seems at peace. as well.  I can feel it – love for both of them.  I don’t know where the future leads, but I want them both with me.

Writer’s Notes:

The only thing I am going to comment on is the idea that a person can love romantically more than one person.  given my own experience, I say it is very possible to do so.  It is only our western society that says it is wrong, but I have yet to find any traditional reason to say so.  One form of sexual orientation is bisexual and that kind of assumes a Trois relationship for such a person to be satisfied completely.  I also think that it is more of an ownership thing of saying you control someone else’s sexuality and you don’t simply because you are lovers.

The one thing I think is for certain is the human race is not naturally faithfully monogamous. We have to work at it and that makes things unnatural at times. I suppose if we git rid of jealousy, envy, and desires to control sex and sexuality, it wouldn’t be a problem. But here we are – the human race – flawed and unhappy because of it.  

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Streetwise” – Space Tramp – Chapter 7 (MegaTraveller Fan Fiction)

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

Story:

Jeremiah did land on his feet, but it wasn’t the way he expected. He was looking for a new ship to serve but everyone was pretty much full and he would have had to take a position as enlisted if he settled for a couple of the jobs.  Then a job with the Free Trader branch office on Regina presented itself. He was fairly sure this meant staying planetside for a year, but he figured it was at least a position that was acceptable for a 2nd Officer.

He became one of the Free Trader Office’s representatives with the various labor unions on Regina, particularly the starport dockworker’s unions. This involved a whole different kind fo diplomacy as the unions were often at odds with the free traders because each captain had to contract individually with them or in small groups of ships.  This was very unlike their contracts withe various star lines, but on occasion, the Free Trader’s Union would negotiate a flat rate for all free Trader captains.  But then it would change and the whole game would start over again.

So Jeremiah worked for a lot of different Free Trader captains negotiating rates for the dock workers. It actually offered him a deeper look into the underworld nature of Regina.  Yeah. regina is the Sector capital and yeah it’s tech level is high, but it also has a seedier side and Jeremiah found out about various parts of it.  He wasn’t sure this past year which had been handier to have – his ability to party at a bar with union bosses; his blade on his hip that he could use well; or his developing sense of being streetwise.

One union boss tried to drink him under the table but he reversed it on her and in the process got a better deal for three Free Trader members.  The next day to show there were no hard feelings; she took him to bed so that lead to even more deals with her particular union group.  Some forms of negotiation were definitely very enjoyable.

Another occasion involved a strike of some of the dockworkers but one hand on his blade was enough to send them packing.  A thug from another union tried some shit with him and the blade came in handy again. Although he never actually got any blood on it.  The threat was enough and only once did he have to pull it and the wide eyes of the thug whose neck it suddenly found itself pointed at were enough to make Jeremiah smile.

Of course, there were some deals that were less than above board legally.  Getting sensitive goods around customs for example. Some union bosses would offer a lower rate for a wink and a nod when it came to other activities of a less than legal nature. Smuggling was everywhere. Jeremiah simply learned how to do these things and who to talk to when it counted. Between his new understanding of the streets and his legal knowledge, he walked the fine line between legal and illegal many times.

It was a long year where he never got past the cargo holds of most ships but he learned a lot about the starport dockworkers and the Regina criminal underground.  His old days on Strouden now made a little more sense. Navigating this underground, and its less than savory world, had a lot of uses.

His contract complete with the Free Trader Union, he sat in now what had become his favorite hangout The Naked Gypsy. He now hoped the next contract would get him back into space. He heard Captain Juros had settled into retirement, so that was out.  No, he needed to have the deck of a ship under him again and to see new worlds again.  He disliked this last year financially because it required he maintain an apartment and so he hadn’t made any money but had survived.

He downed his glass and according to custom headed upstairs to the brothel.  He was a little wiser and it was still a long few years until he could test for his 1st Officer exam.  Time to learn and grow as much as possible.  Well, that and enjoy life when possible.  Madam Heather said there were a few new girls since his last visit.  Time to try one out.

Megatraveler Notes:

Free Trader 2rd Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O3 – 2nd Officer   Terms Served: 1

UPP: A67A74   Age: 23  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 1, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Handgun – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 4, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

Year Six:

Roll for position availability: 8+ 1 for Intelligence = 9  – position available.

Roll for assignment: 7 + 1 for Social 5- = 8 – No Business

Survival Roll: 5 – survives,

Skill Roll: 3 – Skill acquired.

Bonus: N/A

Roll for Skills: ( 1 fo skill roll): Rolls Planet Life Table: 2 – Streetwise – 1

MegaTraveller Shorthand

Free Trader 2rd Officer Jeremiah Kilwood

Rank: O3 – 2nd Officer   Terms Served: 1

UPP: A67A74   Age: 24  Homeworld: Strouden UWP: A-745988-D N Hi In

Skills: Pilot – 1, Navigation – 1, Engineering – 1, Sensor Ops – 1, Legal – 1, Carousing – 1, Small Blade-1, Turret Weapons-1, Streetwise – 1, Grav Vehicle – 0, Computer – 0, Handgun – 0, Vacc Suit – 0

Brownie Points: 4, Bonus Money: 25000 Cr.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Meditation Altar” – Odin’s Eye

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin’s) Day.    

Discussion:

Over the last couple of weeks, my mind has drifted in meditation and part of the issue is of course foci.  I don’t have many and there is also something to having a ritual in meditation that helps you down-center and then clears your head in order to open it up to thoughts and feelings that are more focused.

I was reading another blog a little while ago and this is why my head has been thinking of a meditation altar of sorts with a few rituals to focus and calm down. Then I can concentrate on virtues and any other thoughts about the coming day.  If you want to read the source document for my thoughts: ” Welcome to My Altars” – Myst Nokomis.

Of course, this leads to another discussion as meditation seems to indicate that I might be believing in something beyond and I have to reiterate that meditating does not necessarily indicate that one has spiritual beliefs. A book I would recommend for those who believe that meditation can be something outside the spiritual is How Words Can Change Your Brain by Newburg and Waldman.  These two guys are neuroscientists who study brain patterns and basically developed a meditative technique based purely on meditation on positive virtues.  It works in that it allows a human brain to very much focus on those virtues and it takes as little as three to five minutes.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

“To see the truth, change one eye for another”

Faith:

Meditation for me then is not necessarily about faith.  I follow Asatru for two basic reasons.  Firstly, I am a practitioner of the Nine Noble Virtues and try to apply them to my life.  Secondly, I am trying to recover my lost pagan heritage in terms of culture and religion.  My meditation is more about the virtues and my studies of mythology and religion of the Vikings are pretty much about the second.

Meditation:

Meditation is about me awakening my mind and emotions.  It about concentrating on the things that matter to me and how to engage the world around me. I turn inward in order to deal with the outward better when I come out of meditation.  My desire for a ritual and an altar of sorts is about consistency.  Religion has tapped into one thing if I take Newburg and Waldman’s book seriously, and that it understands the importance of routine and repetition.  That’s the point for me.

Theology:

For all practical purposes, I have no active belief in any god, goddess or force. It makes me academically an agnostic epistemologically and an atheist in the reality of my belief. If I have belief in anything then it is in humanity itself of which much of mythology is nothing more than personification of human forces of various kinds and the forces of nature that human beings relate to regularly.  Humanity is my ‘diety’ if you will and I express that understanding through Asatru and relate best to Norse mythology. It’s not that I don’t hold myself open to other views.  It is just I am still seeking and looking for the rational divine if it exists.

Spirituality:

Spirituality is about virtue, relationships, mind, emotion, body, and connections.  As such my one spiritual practice is meditation.  I don’t pray anymore.  I don’t fast or any of that stuff.  I simply seek to get my mind and heart right at the start of every day and then live my life. In truth, this is probably the essence of all spiritual life.

Conclusion:

On a practical side, I am going to make a meditation altar that involves as many of the senses as possible. Sight, smell, touch, sound, etc. I think the more I connect my meditational thoughts to as many senses as possible the more they will be both remembered and have a positive effect on my life.  That, I suppose, is another thing that religion does tap into that is very human.

I need something that can move and be put away, probably has symbols, candles, and incense. For sound probably I will have to use my phone and earphones.  I guess what would constitute a taste fitting for meditation might be a question I have but I will think about it.   The main objective being to have tihs in place before the month is out.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!