Motivation

“A Warrior’s Foundation” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

Identity is one of the most important things that a person can understand particularly when it regards themselves. How one views one’s own identity has a great bearing on the decisions they make and the level of success they attain. I have spent a great deal of time these last few months meditating on the subject of my own identity.

In the end, three words keep rising to the top: Warrior, Wayfarer, and Wolf.

Today I want to look at the Warrior.  To me, this is foundational to my identity as far as what is a core identity.  I know there is little cause for a man to be an actual warrior these days.  Very few have the true necessity of fighting in a real battle. But the battle of life still requires in my identity a warrior’s philosophy. “Better to be a warrior in a garden, than a gardener in a war.”  A warrior’s foundation allows one to face all things in life with honor, courage, and truth.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

Part of this core is and perhaps the central part of the core is Honor. To be noble of being and to recognize it in others. To be positive about my future.  This week marks a year since things regarding the honor of my past identity came unraveled. My life as a pastor ( my central identity at the time) came to an end just a year ago, and a change from pastor to the warrior as a foundational identity started.  It has been a rocky road to get here, but I am feeling like something is about to happen here that will be a larger leap into a more honorable me. Part of this is to surround myself with honorable people, who are my core friends.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.

It is not always easy to do what is right.  As I look back at last year at this time because I was a pastor only in name and not in full truth; it was difficult to show courage. These days I face mistakes much better and own up to them when they happen.  The change is simply a matter of understanding my identity of being a warrior that takes responsibility for his actions. Courage is central to that.  To act with courage at the right time has become a core principle.  At the same time, it also takes courage to confront when people are not taking their responsibility and that has its risks but that is a far better course than to sit back and let them continue to avoid their responsibility.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Learn Latin by March 31st, 2020 to the point I can take a test and show my self proficient.

The warrior faces the truth.  Lies do not become true men of action.  I know one man who was a friend of mine who is now an enemy. I would say this is his greatest failing.  He is a good combatant, but he surrounds himself with lies. He is a false front of bravery, but he never seems to have the courage to face the truth. He only bolsters his own previously held opinions, no matter what the cost might be to what is true. I seek to never be like that.  One needs humility to know, understand and apply the truth. If you can’t face a simple truth that it is not possible to be right all the time, the truth will not be your core.

Higher Virtue: Love:

What does a warrior love? It is a modified version of the question: which path is the most loving? If the path is honorable, requires courage and embraces the truth, it is the one the warrior would walk.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  2. Meditation – 3 min.
  3. Check Communications and Email.
  4. Paper Journal: Create Daily Log and To Do List.
  5. Stretching / Yoga
  6. Breakfast, Medications, and Supplements.
  7. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  8. Get Dressed for the Day

I decided to make daily stretching a part of this routine again.  I am noticing that without this I have a lot more problems with stiffness and joint soreness. It also is a good continuation of the calm meditative state I am going for in the morning.

I want this next week to be a test of all the disciplines from today to next Sun’s Day. Let’s see if we can have a full and complete week.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Me and Mozart to Metallica” – The Skald’s Lyre

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Saturn’s Day

I am currently planning on doing a lot of research on Norse Mythology in order to do a few Crossing Bifrost posts with a little more knowledge behind them.  I am instead going to implement one of the changes I proposed which is to create a series of posts on music.  This will be subtitled The Skald’s Lyre and will most likely appear with Crossing Bifrost on Saturn’s Day.  I miss discussing music and I want to get back to it.  The one effect this will have on other posts is that the Pagan pulpit will probably only have one song now on Sun’s Day.

I find music to be far more spiritual the older I get.  It has always had an emotional effect on me and I can’t go for too long before I find myself looking for something to listen to either motivate men or calm me.  I have also discovered over the years I am far less devoted to a particular kind of music or a particular era.  I am most interested in musical discovery; that is the discovery of new music from any era that I can enjoy and from which I can draw inspiration.

My musical journey like most people started with my parent’s music.  They both grew up in the 40s and 50s so that music was a regular part of what was on the radio.  My mom was a band member in high school and so she focused on classical music; so I cut my teeth in understanding music as a child on Mozart, Beethoven, Bach, and Brahms.  I liked it, particularly Mozart. I don’t if she realized it but she sowed the seeds for my metal baptism later.

Dad was more of an eclectic guy when it came to music. He liked the 50s do whop groups, country (and by country I mean old country, not this new stuff that is more pop with a country twang) and he was the one that introduced me to Johnny Cash.  Both my parents were young adults during the 60s, and so that music was also around too. My dad must have had a thing for Janis Joplin and Iron Butterfly as he had their albums.

Of course, we went to church and the old hymns and gospel were there as well as some new fangled worship music later.  My problem was as I went through school, I never settled on anything.  Until my first day in high school.

I entered the doors as a freshman full of fear.  I have been introverted all my life. I was tall and skinny.  I had started playing football, but I had no real athletic talent. I was nerdy and kept to myself except for the few friends I would keep close because of church or school.  That first day though I walked in and half the school as wearing Def Leppard “Pyromania” t-shirts.  I bought the album a few days later and listened to it. My parents had gotten cable so I hit MTV and saw all kinds of what would be later known as Hair Metal.  It was not this that drew me, but I would close my eyes and hear Mozart, just played very fast and with electric power.

After that metal was a part of my life. We played it in the locker room before a football game so I began to understand the emotional power of music.  ‘Back in Black’ by ACDC became the unofficial school song as ‘red and black were our school colors and our home uniform for football was black, head to toe. Hard Rock, Metal and 80s Pop were aa part of the equation for me as a teen of the 1980s. When I hit young adulthood a band called Metallica would dominate my music in the 1990s.

Now you need to understand I lived a double life with music from my Freshman year in high school on.  I had an extensive Chrisitan Rock and Metal collection; which while it irritated the fundamentalist pastors I had at the time, they wouldn’t completely tell me to knock it off because of the lyrics.  That was my public music.  When I was away from the church and in my own room, there was a collection of devil worshiping secular music and Playboys under my bed.  It was this music, and perhaps even the Playboys, that brought out in me the side that was true to a part of me that church told me to repress.  I just never could shut that off and so I became a headbanger. A Christian one in public and a secular one in private.

I have always listened to what I want since becoming an adult. I like and prefer things with strings and multiple part harmony.  I like a lot of things my parents liked and since then I have a lot of very eclectic tastes.  I have never really gotten to be the old man shouting at the kids around – “That isn’t real music.”  Even as a metalhead, my only gripe is other metalheads who start decrying different types of metal as not real metal. What a bunch of noize.  If I like it, I like it and these last ten years I don’t think there is a genre of music that I don’t have at least one song in that I can enjoy.  That said. if I want inner peace, some form of metal, alternative music or a sappy love song hits my playlist.

The Skald’s Lyre will have different kinds of posts.  Sometimes I will focus on an artist or band. Sometimes I will focus on a particular song or group of songs. Sometimes I might focus on a particular genre of music.  I might follow a theme in music or even reactions to some songs that I have loved for years but some other person is hearing for the first time. The subject will be basically music I am listening to at the time and what I feel and think about it.

To close this week though I will leave you with a historically significant song.  This song was the first song to ever be played on MTV: “Video Killed the Radio Star” by The Buggles:

Perhaps it will be as equally prophetic for me.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Meditations of Iron” – A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Journal Entry:

This last month and a half’s progress has been greatly aided by my return to a gym.  This is not just true of my body although stepping on the scale this week and seeing that I am 281 lbs., which is the lowest I have been in a decade, was a particular thrill.  As most of you know the thing that I enjoy about lifting is the mental state it trains in you. Meditation is central to lifting in that every set, rep, and exercise has a way of challenging your mind as well as your body.

The goal is actually not weight loss either, but fat-loss coupled with muscle gain which is an entirely different thing.  I measure this with a mirror. This is Jack LaLanne’s method of staying motivated, which is to step out of the shower and gaze at your naked body in the mirror until you get angry enough and motivated enough to do something to change it and reforge it.  I do this every day.

See the source image

I still have a long way to go.  But the goal is to trade fat for muscle, not just lose weight, so I meditate on the best way to do that.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To follow A FULL Paleo Diet Plan from April 1, 2019, to March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April Fools Day, April 1st, 2020.

My diet has been more spot on and for the most part, this is due to the fact that every time I eat something off plan it makes me feel like shit. Not because I don’t make allowances for cheat meals or carbs during the day, but it literally makes me feel a little queasy and I think my body is trying to tell me something.  I think I am ready for some more purging of things I shouldn’t have in my diet.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

The exercise plan is coming along, I just need to make some changes as far as routines and when I do things to have it completely consistent. There is a spiritual side of all my exercise.  Weightlifting is not alone in that regard as hiking and stretching have their meditative side.

I have been saving for the tattoo.  I am currently engaged in the process of deciding what to do first.  Much has changed since I last spoke on this but there are some tattoos that keep rising to the top. The question is which one would be the most significant as the first one. Right now I leaning toward something like this as it is the most complete expression of my philosophy I have seen in a single tattoo:

The only problem would be where to put it.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

My wife and I are scheduled and we both have the time off for June 9th through the 11th and we have our reservations at a hotel so the mini-vacation is set.  It is less than a month away so it is something we are both looking forward to.  There is also this family vacation on the horizon, so the next goal of saving for that might simply fall into place.

A genetic test is not beyond the realm of possibility within the next year.  Once I know the results I can start the research into where my ancestors got on the boat and got off.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom: 

The wise choice in this is to take care of my body and be loyal to myself first. Something I meditate on often to assess whether or not I am staying true to this. If I don’t do either of these things, the rest of it becomes jeopardized.  Painful but important lessons learned.  Wisdom gained and being implemented.

Weekly Routine: 

  1. Weightlifting/Stretching – Minimum 3 days per week.
  2. Walking – Minimum 3 days a week
  3. Job Search – Minimum 3 days a week
  4. Cleaning – 3 days a week.
  5. Writing – 3 times a week
  6. Latin – 3 times per week
  7. Cheat Meal Count: 3 per week.

This routine needs more dedication, but it is solid as a plan.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 2

  1. Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018
  2. Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019 – May 2019

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I added the completion of my internship this week and thus the requirements for my degree are finished.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“The Wolf Within” – Odin’s Eye – The Grey Wayfarer’s Spirituality

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Thor’s Day

Discussion:

Well, the time has come in the rotation of Odin’s Eye to deal very directly with my own personal spirituality.  There is no wrong or right way to practice spirituality as a pagan. One simply looks at life and the universe and seeks to both understand its spiritual nature and develop spiritual strength within through doing so.  There are common themes in the spiritual life of pagans to be sure, but the ways of practicing paganism are as individual as the people that do so.

So when a pagan talks spirituality, they use their own metaphors.  For me, the concepts of Wolves, Ravens and other Viking metaphorical language are my way of describing abstract concepts.  The wolf is symbolic of that part of me that is filled with passion whether that passion is based on need or want.  It contrasted with the idea fo the Raven which is the rational and wise part of me.  The two work together to pick and follow the best path for me.

‘The wolf within’ is the concept of that part of me which is wolf itself.  As a Christian is used to deny and try to subjugate to slavery this wolf.  Now I let him roam free. That wolf is the sum of all I want and need.  The hunger and fury of being a man in this world. If there is anything that I recognize now, it is my wolf within is not inherently sinful or evil and I let him live free and roam free. Funny thing is, he is not all bad. Like anything else in human nature, I have found him to be the motivating force of my life and the one that is truly strong when I need strength.

This is an important spiritual concept for me right now.  That if there is a wild and untamed side to me, that is a good thing.  It is just a question of how to best utilize it.

Time to Look Through the Eye:

Faith:

I have always felt that if there is something to have faith in, it is my own passions. Passion drives us, but it can be a double-edged sword. That said, I have found that my intuition is something more right than wrong.  That intuition didn’t come from my reason or wisdom; although they certainly chimed in, it came from the gut level uneasiness that the prowler of the wolf within creates. It is this sense of danger that comes from the wolf, not the clear seeing raven of reason. When it comes to the danger these days, particularly with regard to danger in relationships, I find the wolf is far more my friend and something I place my faith in to be both wary and watchful.

Religion:

Religion always has a moral code based on whatever the founder of the religion says is right or wrong. Sexual desire becomes lust. Industry becomes greed. There is no end to this and it is more often this notion that so-called ‘baser’ instincts are labeled as sinful or evil than other things. Fulfilling needs and wants becoming bad or evil. This notion of higher desires and lower ones is inherently religious. I don’t find any desire sinful anymore, just a question of whether is it is wise to engage it.  I can understand all virtues engage all desires at some point and thus engage them all in their proper time and place. In pursuing virtue rather than religion, I can find the profitable in any need or want, even the base power of rage or hunger.  I don’t have two natures to feed one and starve the other.  I have a single nature that at times resembles a wolf and at other times a raven and sometimes both at the same time.

Theology:

I view mankind theologically as what they are.  Every part of us has a purpose in that, and what others consider sinful, I see as human. That is not to say there is no morals or ethics, but I can draw as much spirituality from passionate sex as I can from reading a book on logic.  All things that a human being wants or needs can be the door to spiritual strength and enlightenment. All desires, needs, thoughts, and experiences are righteous to me.  Ethics and morals for me is something that involves it all, not simply what supposed revealed religions says those morals and ethics should be. All parts of what it means to be human have the potential to lead to spirituality. We are not divided in nature as human beings; it is all the same human nature and no part of it is inherently good or evil.

Spirituality:

So here is the central path for me right now.  Learning how each feeling, desire, need, thought and experience can lead me to greater growth of my spirituality. To do this doesn’t just mean I embrace the raven but also the wolf that is inside myself. To feel is just as spiritual as to think, and I have found this transition enlightening. I grow spiritually when I hold my grandson; when I lift weights; when I make love to my wife; when I hang with friends; when I work. When I am doing anything really there is a potential to see something with my spiritual eyes and grow and gain the strength of spirit I need for each day.  That includes when I let the wolf out to hunt and play.

Conclusion:

The image remains for me of myself as a Grey Pilgrim. Part of what it means for me to be grey is not to label any part of my nature as dark or light.  It is just at times I am a pilgrim that is following his wolf’s heart and not just his raven mind. There is no difference between the two of them when it comes to who will give me the greater potential for spiritual understanding and growth. The wolves and ravens don’t just walk with me, they are inside me and I embrace them. They are what help me find my path and passionately pursue it.

Continuing to Walk that Path,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Business Meditations” – A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

So today, I looked up all my transcript information and grades for my last classes and low and behold I got an A for my internship.  I did well in the other three classes as well so my final GPA was 3.61 – Magna Cum Laude. This semester was all about finishing the internship and gaining some business skills – Mission Accomplished!

I basically have two issues right now which are: 1) Finding a job utilizing said degree and 2) Meditating on what I want to do next as far as education.  The first is made easier now that I have the degree in hand. The second is a question of following my virtues to something that fits me both professionally and personally.

I find in my morning meditations this comes up a lot.  What Next? The Business Virtues come up a lot at these times.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by the end of June 2019 or before.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company.

I still have a month and a half to find a new and better paying job.  I enjoy the people I work for and work with currently, but I need a new challenge and I need to make a lot more income to be self-reliant into the future. The goal is to ‘retire’ running my own business or company so this is step one toward that.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019*

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published.

Goal Achieved*   Now I have to come up with a new one for Industriousness.  That will require some meditative thought as well. I know what I want to write for my novel and now I can truly get started so my secondary career as a writer can get started. Transitioning here at what I am working on is the issue for the next couple weeks.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader of a support group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I have a little bit of time on the goal here as well as the bucket list item.  I just have no idea when this is going to be or even where with my career focus being up in the air right now. I just want to make sure compassion is part of my business and I provide a place to be hospitable to others.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

Being just is something I meditate on a lot. There is a reason why these higher virtues don’t have strict definitions because I feel all of them including justice are difficult to define in some ways. I meditate on each relationship I have and try to figure the best way to approach it. Being just with each one is different because each relationship is different. When you find out what is important to someone, the just thing is to respect that not use it to your advantage at their expense.

Daily Routine:

  1. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  3. Reading – half-hour. Priority order: work, school, pleasure
  4. Study / Homework / Research: half hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, other actions, etc.
  6. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  7. Weekly Routine Items
  8. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

Next week I will be really bearing down on this aspect as a lot of things right now in front of me require this routine to be tight.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Morning Meditation” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day. 

Journal Entry:

Trying to get back to peace is not always easy.  I have found that morning meditation is a good way to start. Reviewing everything that is important to me and then meditating on it keeps those days in perspective.  The perspective of the Big Picture.  The perspective of being at peace with myself as the central thing to my being.

It is the start of the Morning Routine when I do it properly that set my day off on a more positive course.  Focusing on one virtue and meditating on it for five minutes doesn’t seem like a great activity, but it is.  It makes me remember what is important.

The specifics of the day come into focus revolving around that virtue as well as its connections to the other virtues. It becomes a time of peace and that is the right path to start on for the day. I can’t recommend the practice enough.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

I need to start walking this week on my days off.  With no need to spend time doing homework for school there is even less excuse for this.  This is also about meditation not just getting healthy and ready for that hike. The blog streak is at 225 days in a row with this post.  That leaves 140 days to go.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.

Yep, I think the tattoo will be first.  I am saving money for it every paycheck.  People might wonder what is taking so long, but I plan I finding the best and paying them for it.  If I am going to put something permanent on my skin – the standards are very high. Every day’s progress is a day closer to Budapest.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Be Honest, and Speak Truth to Myself and Others.  To Be Silent in the presence of Fools.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Learn Latin by March 31st, 2020 to the point I can take a test and show my self proficient.

With my study and homework time freed up, writing and learning Latin can take its place quite easily. I just need to focus on those things right now that school is done for a while.

Higher Virtue: Love:

In morning meditation I find that I am learning the love of self more and more.  I am very loyal to that which I love so learning to love myself is a part of learning to show myself some fidelity. the one thing I am looking forward to this summer, now that school is over is to spend some time working on myself in a lot of areas.  Studying the things I want to study, reading the things I want to read and writing the things I want to write. Forging myself with a little self-love as the fire should do wonders for me.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  2. Meditation – 3 min.
  3. Check Communications and Email.
  4. Paper Journal: Create Daily Log and To Do List.
  5. Breakfast, Medications, and Supplements.
  6. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

I really need to be a little more tight on this.  It is important to set the day right and start it right. This Routine definitely does that.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – The Grey and the Wayfarer – Part 10 – Storm’s Edge

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Saturn’s Day

No Crossin Bifrost this week. I just don’t have the time for proper research.  There however might be another Rogue Wizard this weekend.

If you ever had that moment where you are standing outside and you can see the edge of a storm coming in toward you, then you might have an idea of what I am feeling.  It’s the storm known as The Grey and what is causing it is memories of the past, particularly from this time last year. I know it is coming and I know it is going to be tough.  I also know it is probably unavoidable. The list of problems is already forming in my head.

  1. My last sermon was May 27th, 2018 and I haven’t been in a church since May 28th, 2018.  It a kind of bittersweet milestone. I miss my people at times but they also fired me after years of preaching love, grace, and forgiveness.  Seems like my words were wasted. Twenty years of ministry is over and I am sure that some small amount of Grey will try to creep into my life over it because I feel largely it accomplished very little.
  2. Last year my wife and I were separated from May 27th until August 19th. We called off our divorce pretty much with days to spare. This last year has been a time of counseling and work to get our relationship back on track.  It has been good but we are both going to hit our 30th anniversary this year and remember that last year we were separated for it.  We hopefully will use our mini-vacation to make some better memories for next year.  One thing I am glad of is I won’t have to deal with an annual church even which caused us to miss our anniversary to stay and work at the church for many years on that day.
  3. A good friend betrayed me last year and is no longer a friend. I suspected he wasn’t the most loyal of a person based on his track record with others; but still, I trusted him and he took advantage of that so he could come off the white knight riding to the rescue.  Yeah, still burns me and I patiently wait for karma to bite his ass. That knife in my back through left a scar and I am sure it will flare up as we head through May and June.
  4. Lost love.  I deal with the pain of loss here as much as I wish I didn’t. Forgiveness has been easy on this one except for the one thing I have previously mentioned. It is just my nature to forgive those I have loved unless betrayal is involved. I don’t feel that way about this one, she had the decency to at least stab in the chest and look me in the face when she did it. I just feel I took a chance, rolled the dice and lost. Unfortunately, it was my heart the dice were being rolled for and it got hurt because of that loss.  My new love for my wife is helping; but like all things, it takes time and I am sure it will never fully heal.  It never does.

So what to do when you know you have a storm to walk through? Well, knowing it is coming helps so you can prepare.  Resolving to walk on regardless is the simple act of a survivor. I know what the memories involved; know the emotions involved.  I have dealt with them before.  Knowing is half the battle as GI Joe used to say. The rest of the battle is actually having the courage to keep walking and to act when necessary.

Well, time to pull the collar up around my neck and my hat down.  Time to make sure my robes and cloak are pulled tight around me. Have the wolves and ravens go ahead and scout the path. A storm is coming and I need to keep walking.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Self Virtues – Life’s Blacksmith

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Frigg and Freya’s Day

Journal Entry:

It seems this proverb has a lot of origin stories but I can imagine every blacksmith probably drew this conclusion that each and every person smiths his own life. Life being raw iron that needs to be smithed in order to turn it into something that you want it to be. Who you are and what your life will become results from taking the raw materials of both and forging them into what you want. Being a smith is no easy task and having the life you want is not easy either.

Life tends to be like iron in this regard.  Very little of it can be changed without discipline, perseverance, and fidelity.   Particularly fidelity to one’s self. These are the tools that one forges one’s life from.  This concept dominates my thinking at times as I try to build the life I want and these virtues along with the other six are tools that make this possible.

Discipline:

“Discipline is the willingness to be hard on oneself first and then if needed help with the development with others, so that greater purposes may be achieved.”

Principle: Apply discipline to every aspect of life that it can be applied.

Goal: To follow A FULL Paleo Diet Plan from April 1, 2019, to March 31, 2020.

Bucket List: Do a rebellious act on April Fools Day, April 1st, 2020.

To make a good sword, steel has to be folded over and over again.  There is a repetition to most things in smithing that is about making something stronger, better or so it can be done by habit. This requires you to be hard on yourself first and then others around you second when appropriate.  Right now I look at what I am trying to achieve both as far as goals and my bucket list and discipline myself through routines so that relentlessly I am working toward achieving them.

Perseverance:

“Perseverance is the ability to stand up and return from defeat and failure”

Principle: Keep getting up after every defeat or failure.

Goal: To engage in an exercise program that involves weightlifting, hiking/walking, and stretching/ yoga an average of three days a week from April 1st, 2019 to March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: To get at least one tattoo by March 18th, 2020.

Every Smith screws up at some point.  They have to go back and fix something or start over or keep doing something that is tedious to get where you want to be. Failure is never looked at as final defeat but rather a lesson learned and an opportunity to change and grow.  That is the heart of perseverance.

Fidelity: 

“Fidelity is the will to be loyal to one’s Gods and Goddesses, to one’s Folk, to one’s self, and loyalty to one’s friends was as valued as highly as loyalty to one’s family.”

Principle: Be loyal to those who have been loyal to me.

Goal: Celebrate my wife and I’s 30th anniversary (June 10th, 2019) with a mini-vacation

Bucket List: Discover all the countries of origin from my genetics and visit them all by March 18th, 2029.

I am struggling with this part – being loyal to myself.  There are things I want in life yet and I need to make the commitment not to compromise on them. I tend to try to make others happy at times and at the expense of myself.  Old habits I guess. These days though, I need to build myself again and recast myself in a different form. To do that I need to stay true to the vision I have for myself.

Higher Virtue – Wisdom: 

Experience can breed wisdom or regret.  The choice is yours. I choose to learn and grow and look for something better. Wisdom is a big help in this and I am learning it every day.

Weekly Routine: 

  1. Weightlifting/Stretching – Minimum 3 days per week.
  2. Walking – Minimum 3 days a week
  3. Job Search – Minimum 3 days a week
  4. Cleaning – 3 days a week.
  5. Writing – 3 times a week
  6. Latin – 3 times per week
  7. Cheat Meal Count: 3 per week.

School is winding down and I will refocus my attention on a shorter list of things. One of those things is getting all my routines to start to forge my life better. This one, in particular, is very key to doing that.

Goals and Bucket List Items Achieved (Since Summer 2018):

Goals Achieved: 1  Graduated College with a BS in Political Science and minors in Economics and International Business – December 2018.

Bucket List Items Achieved: 0

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Business Virtues – Generous Leader

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Wooden’s (Odin’s) Day

Journal Entry:

I miss being in leadership.  I also miss being generous.  That said, I understand the need for this hiatus from both right now.  I am healing from a lot of things and while I have seen wounded leaders do very well, I am also sure those same leaders collapsed when the crisis was over to heal themselves.  I guess I am just healing and life itself will determine when I get back into the action.

“A leader should be silent, thoughtful and bold in battle.”  It is what I strive for and the virtues of being self-reliant, industrious and hospitable all do their part in the actual activity of trying to be that kind of leader. All the virtues really do but it is these three that guide me in the kind of leader I want to be.  Self-reliance tells me that if I am not willing to do something myself, I shouldn’t ask someone else to do it. Industriousness tells me that if I want those under my leadership to work hard and enjoy their work, I need to do the same.  Hospitality says I need to reward those who do a good job for me well and not be cheap or stingy.

The last line of Havamal stanza 15 points out this in a lifelong attitude that must be cultivated.

Self-Reliance:

“Self-Reliance is the spirit of independence, which is achieved not only for the individual but also for the family, clan, tribe, and nation.”

Principle: To achieve and maintain personal independence and advocate for independence in my family, state and nation.

Goal:  Find a new, better paying job by the end of June 2019 or before.

Bucket List: To own and run my own successful business or company.

I can’t emphasize liberty being the key to prosperity enough. Throughout history, liberty and prosperity go hand in hand and that is no accident.  I will remain an advocate for liberty for myself and others until that day of death.  It is a very noble cause to fight for.

Industriousness:

“Industriousness is the willingness to work hard, always striving for efficiency, as a joyous activity in itself”

Principle: Work with the enjoyment of work itself.

Goal: Finalize last requirements for my degree – Internship by May 2019

Bucket List: Write A Novel and Get it Published.

I struggle at times to enjoy doing my current job. It really is my own mind about as it isn’t a terrible job. It is probably my own frustration at not moving toward a new and better paying job that I would enjoy more than anything else.  I don’t want to feel stuck in anything ever again and so that is probably more on me than anything else.

Hospitality:

“Hospitality is the willingness to share what one has with one’s fellows, especially when they are far from home.”

Principle: To share out of my abundance to help people where I can with their life’s journey.

Goal: By March 31st of 2020, to be the leader of a support group of some kind.

Bucket List: To own my own home by March 2024.

I always stand ready to help, but there is still this healing issue that kicks in from time to time. Part of it is my need for counseling to assess the progress of my healing and where I need to go. I don’t want to be guilty of “physician heal thyself” when I may not be good in the eyes of an objective mind.  I want to know for sure that I have been helped before I help others in the same way again.

Higher Virtue – Justice:

I struggle with the fine line between vengeance and seeking justice. Coming to terms with the fact that justice may never happen and moving on also can be difficult. I want to be at peace but there are always the internal struggles that keep me from that and I would like them to end.  Mostly though, I just try to not let my personal pain spill over into my relationships with others.

 Daily Routine:

  1. Wife: Communication / Cuddle Time
  2. Blogging – Organize, revise, write a new post for the next day, 15 min. work on fiction.
  3. Reading – half-hour. Priority order: work, school, pleasure
  4. Study / Homework / Research: half hour per day minimum or until all necessary work is completed.
  5. Personal Business: record financial transactions, savings plan actions, budgeting, appointments, other actions, etc.
  6. Check Communications and Email after 2 pm but before 4 pm.
  7. Weekly Routine Items
  8. Nutrition: Daily Carb Count – 2

I really want to focus on the daily and morning routines once school is over completely.  This is the last week of last things with that.  I do some of the things on this list automatically so that is good. The rest is work in progress.

Still walking,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

Of Wolves and Ravens – The Practical Application of Political Science

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Discussion:

In literally less than a week I will have finished my last requirement for the political science degree I have been working on for four years.  I walked in Fall but my internship will be done before the week is out. I happy about this as it represents something I started and finished and that is a good thing.

The problem is most people have a really poor understanding of what political science is about and so they don’t have a really good knowledge of what a person who has a political science degree can do.  In truth I picked it because of its versatility as you can do a lot of different things with a political science degree, you just have to broaden the scope of your understanding of what politics is.

Political science is a social science discipline that deals with systems of government and the analysis of political activity and political behavior. It deals extensively with the theory and practice of politics which is commonly thought of as the determining of the distribution of power and resources.

I suppose this definition is as good as any.  What I would like to focus on is the idea of the distribution of resources and power because that is what makes this degree so flexible.  Because the distribution of power and resources is universal and common to every organization. Every company and group has a power structure and way of distributing resources that involves human decision and implementation processes and that is what political science is about.  If your company or organization has a policy manual and an organizational flow chart, I can look at it and do the following things:

  1. I can understand how you theoretically want your organization to run.
  2. Give me enough time to analyze your company and I can tell the reality of how your organization actually runs and how resources are really distributed.
  3. I can work to help you optimize your organization or company by offering suggestions on how you can change one or the other of the above.

In this political science simply acknowledges that where two or three are gathered together there is a power structure and thus politics.

To the Wolves and Ravens:

Needs (Geri):

For me personally, I needed a degree choice that was versatile and could offer me a good chance of employment. Political science is broad in that regard.  I have had courses in psychology, accounting, statistics, organizational structure, research, management, leadership, business, etc. I have a lot of different things I have learned for this degree and I see how things connect together because of it. If you’re looking for someone to keep an eye on the big picture of your organization, I have enough knowledge of the different areas to do that.

Wants (Freki):

What I would want is a job that involves this practical understanding of political science and incorporates that versatility.  It is why human resources as a busienss career appeals to me so much as it fits my knowledge, experience, and personality. Human resources and political science are two sides f the same coin to me.  One is more focused on the public and the other is focused on the private sector but seeing both of those intersect a lot they really deal with a lot of the same issues.

Reason (Huginn):

I get to use my reason as a political scientist. In the world of politics, emotional appeal is used because people are not motivated by logical argument but by what they need and want.  People are rarely if ever motivated by actual logic. That means if you want efficiency you need to plan logically but you must figure out how to appeal to what people need and want to motivate them to follow it.  If you don’t figure out the motivation part you will have a nice plan, but it will never be followed by those you lead.

Wisdom (Muninn):

.It is this combination of coming up with good solid policy but understanding that human beings both as individuals and groups are not motivated by reason so much as they are what they need and want that is the heart of the art of political science. Ethics is key in wisdom because you could use this knowledge to manipulate. Being truly benevolent is the heart of wisdom and part of that is respecting human freedom.  It’s a large part of it to me.

Conclusion:

For me, this is the practical side of Of Wolves and Ravens coupled with my knowledge of political science.  For me politics centers on needs, wants, reason and wisdom so there all the characteristics of the wolves and ravens are present and not treated as evil but normal and good. This is my practical and working understanding of political science as well as my own personal philosophy of living. Hopefully, I will be putting it to practical use very soon.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!