New Year’s

Thoughts on 2022

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Sif’s Day and Happy New Year!

I look back on 2022 with frustration and some sense of self-discovery. It’s amazing how much those two go hand in hand.

My frustrations stem from a lack of satisfaction with where I am and what I am doing. I dislike Texas for a lot of reasons. I don’t enjoy the politics of it; the sub-tropical climate without any season to speak of; unless you count moving from green to brown of the foliage at times. The people are friendly enough but their viewpoints on life deeply seep into Christianity. The Bible Belt is alive and well. I reminded of a Viking saying about Christians – “Don’t trust them – they talk peace but carry a sword”. Christians are on the defensive so they are apologetic and kind. Just wait if the tables ever turn. I remember the 80s and 90s all too well. Politics, Climate, Religion, and Oh, Yes. Houston is without a doubt one of the worst-designed cities on the planet. One of the costs one expects in a city is that its design would help with is transport costs. But no, Houston is designed in such a way that you have to drive everywhere, even down a couple of blocks because public transport is a joke and sidewalks are non-existent as far as I can tell. Overall, I would say the environment fits me like a size 6 shoe and I have 10 and a half feet.

Top it off, my dissatisfaction with being a public school teacher has grown to the point that I want to be done at the end of the semester. I will finish out my contract and call it good. I hear most don’t last between 2-5 years so I am in good company. For me it is a little different – this job requires me to care too much – much as I did as a pastor. This is bad for me personally for a number of reasons. I am burnt out from caring about so many. I just can’t do it much longer. I hope that makes sense. It’s not that I don’t care about people, but the direct involvement in a lot of things in everyone’s life – I just can handle based on the simple fact that I get tired of doing it. I am worn out from that, I now understand I am probably too old to get that fire I used to get from helping people like that back. I will send myself to an early grave with the stress of my emotions. I no longer can help at a deep level without it triggering a lot of the Grey for me. My empathy is killing me at this point.

It’s this fact that has triggered The Grey a lot for me. It has led to the self-discovery that when I help others, I fail to take care of myself. This is not about selfishness – it’s about self-preservation. I getting too old for this shit. I have a lot of goals I have yet to achieve and this is not the way. My self-care has suffered and I can’t let that continue.

So in Viking Spirit, I am planning on ending my raid into Texas this summer and heading back home – north – back to Michigan. I can handle one more semester as long as I know it is the last one. But also during this semester, I need to get back to my coping mechanisms that keep the Grey at bay and make my life better overall. I need to once again put myself first. Getting Back to lifting weights, proper diet, writing, reading, meditation, and plan simply being a voice in the world for the NNV and Reason. To live the Viking Life in the modern age.

I suppose the one positive of raids is the plunder is good. I have made more in the last year and a half than four full years of ministry. That said, teaching is a tough job that deserves more. I think I can do better now that I have some measure of what it means to focus on things. Just wish I had a shieldmaiden by my side to help me with the burden of life. That would have made things easier. I haven’t found any shieldmaidens in Texas, maybe they are all northern gals. So I would be headed in the right direction. Tomorrow’s post will have more details on my vision for 2023.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher.  The Grey Wayfarer.

Skal!!!

“Happy New Year” – The Rabyd Skald

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Woden’s (Odin’s) Day!

I am not one for New Year’s resolutions and that is because the results are usually bad.  The right time to make changes at any time you are motivated to make changes and that can be any day of the year.

I do however have a task to engage for the next three days of reviewing my goals, bucket list items and some overall thoughts on 2020.  I will be using the next three days to do that.  Then Sunday will be the Pagan pulpit and then the rest of the normal schedule will follow which I will review on Sif’s Day.

Today’s post is short because I got surprised by a visit from the grandkids after work, so I am putting this post out quickly because I still want to chill before I go to bed and do it all again tomorrow.  I just need the next few days to clean up things, organize a bit and focus.  Thanks for your patience.

I wish you all a happy new year.  Thanks for reading.

I remain,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

“Year’s End” – A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Tyr’s Day

Journal Entry:

It should be noted, that for me new years and years end from a calender sense do not mean as much to me. My philosophy has always been that the day you are thinking about doing something is the day to act on it.  If you wait till later, it will fade and you will find yourself not doing it.  My year cycle goes from April to March which coincides with my birthday.   That is mostly about the assessment of progress and making adjustments to goals and my bucket list.

That said as I am starting to look back at 2019. I can say at least it wasn’t shitty for me.  Not what I wanted completely but it didn’t suck like 2018 or cause grief like 2017.  The two things that bother me right now is I felt I would have a new job by now and that I would have crossed at least one thing off my bucket list by now.   The deadline is March 2020, but those were the things I wanted to get off my list before the end of 2019.

I suppose it could still happen but I am thinking it will be early 2020 that those things will happen and so 2019 has been the same ole for the entire year.  It is the part I have found most frustrating.  But this week is about looking at my bucket list and I am trying to remind myself that I still have three months left.  it really isn’t ‘year’s end’ for me yet.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – To possess a feeling of inner value about myself and my future with a desire to find the same in others.

Goal: Maintain a daily blog streak of one post per day for an entire year (365 days).  (achieved)

Bucket List: Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan by March 2024.

The real issue here is once I  get a new job, I want to start planning on how to gain the hiking equipment I need to start planning for day hikes, weekend hikes and eventually this hike. As a hobby, hiking is less expensive than most but getting good durable equipment will be my first issue.  After that its all about planning and getting some experience.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Goal: Cross one thing off bucket list every year. Deadline March 31st.

Bucket List: Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation by March 2029.

Money rears its ugly head on this item too.  I mean vacations are not that difficult to save for if you have some disposable income.  This has a ten-year time limit; well, nine years now.  I suppose this year’s end is a reminder that the clock is ticking.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness, to be honest, and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – To Honestly Pursue, Accept and Speak Truth to All who will Listen.

Goal: To Write a Non-Fiction Book by March 31st, 2020

Bucket List: Read 52 books (one per week) in the year 2020.

This is a new item and begins at year’s end.  I need to start planning this one out at least a month at a time.

Higher Virtue: Love:

I think for the purpose of self-love, I need to have a bucket list item crossed off very soon. I need 2020 to be a good year.  I really need that at this point.

Morning Routine:

  1. Stretching / Yoga
  2. Shower, Personal Hygiene, Breakfast, Morning Meds.
  3. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV), Principles, Goals and Bucket List
  4. Meditation – 5 min.
  5. Check Communications and Email.
  6. Paper Journal: Create a Daily Log and To-Do List.
  7. Get Dressed for the Day

My routines are good and next week I will look at them specifically.  But mostly it is the execution that needs to be better.

I remain.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard, and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

The Rabyd Skald – New Year and Blog Changes

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day.

As I come into the new year I just need to make some blogging and writing announcements and offer up some thanks to my readers.  It should be noted that my last post I passed a milestone of 100 posts on this blog and this is 101.

Firstly with the new year you are going to see some changes in the pages at the top of the blog.  Mostly this is a practical change as after three months the pages are getting a little crowded with posts so I need to start breaking things down by two month intervals each with their own page which will be sub page under the main headings. I am going to make sure more links are available for navigation purposes.

There are also going to be new pages reflecting some new post types. I already started the page for Crossing Bifrost my new series on Norse Mythology.   I will also be starting a new fictional page for sort stories and poems under a new heading of some sort. That will make its debut in January sometime.

My daily writing schedule this coming year will hopefully look something like this.

Blogging: (every day) 

  1. Page the previous days posts.
  2. Edit today’s post.
  3. Write tomorrow’s post.
  4. Write blog fiction for a half hour

Writing: ( 4/ days a week) 

  1. Edit previous writing
  2. Put 1000 words on paper.

I thought about this a lot and I don’t find this overly ambitious considering a lot of things that used to take up my time like school and ministry are no longer present. I must consider being a writer as a possible career or side career and this is as good a time as any to do so.

Thank You and Happy New Year:

I want to thank all my readers for this year. If you hung around the whole thing you know I went through three blogs, a thousand personal crises and tremendous stressful change. If you hung around and were supportive though all that, I give you my most sincere thanks. Thank You and mostly thank you for reading no matter who you are.  It’s what writers live for – to be read.

Finally, Best wishes for the New Year. May 2019 be your best year yet.

Yours,

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!

A Skald’s Life – Foundational Virtues – An Oath not Resolutions

/ Ed Raby Sr / Leave a comment

Happy Moon’s Day. It’s the 12th night of Yule.  This is the Night of Oaths. This is the night with the greatest feasting; it is a sacred night that marked the final passing of the Wild Hunt. This is night when oaths for the coming year were made. The custom of caroling has its origins in this night. That and New Years resolutions.  Only with the vikings this was a night of oaths.  Sacred oaths which were considered the most holy on this night. Especially those sworn on Frey’s boar or Thor’s Hammer. 

Journal Entry:

I have never been one for resolutions and as the year draws to a close I still feel the same way as most people who such resolutions are done and often fail. I have found that the best time to resolve to do something is when you are thinking on it and are emotionally motivated and that can happen at any time.

I also already have plans that have been developed with goals, a bucket list and other motivating factors in place where I am trying to achieve certain ‘ends’, so oaths or resolutions don’t really help there.

I also think the best advice about oaths is found in Matthew 5:

“Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform your oaths to the Lord.’ But I say to you, do not swear at all … But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ 

In short keeping your word in general is far better than making oaths and I heartily agree. But I also see that oaths are needed in certain situations.  Otherwise, motivation can be lacking and so oaths bind us to act. I do then have an oath to take.

My Oath for 2019:

By all that is truly holy, I swear to:

  1. Be loving and act in love toward my wife, family and friends. 
  2. To execute justice when the power to do so is given to me. 
  3. Act wisely in all my endeavors. 

I know this is not specific but I am new to this oath thing so this year it will have to do.  As I go through this year, the oaths I might have to swear on oath night next year will become clearer I think.

Honor:

“Honor is the feeling of inner value and worth from which one knows that one is noble of being, and the desire to show respect for this quality when it is found in the world”

Principle – Be positive about my future

I was a good weekend and I am feeling like I am developing a sense of inner value or worth again.  I am also learning to respect those qualities in others.

Courage:

“Courage is the bravery to do what is right always.”

Principle – Act with Courage at the right time.

Bravery is something I find a little easier.  This coming year I am going to need  lot of it as I start something completely new for myself.  I need to take risks and at my age that can be hard to do. I must however engage in actions that would befit someone younger and bolder.

Truth:

“Truth is the willingness to be honest and to say what one knows to be true and right. It is often better to not say anything at all if one cannot be honest.”

Principle – Pursue knowledge, wisdom and truth at all times.

Honest assessment of where I am is needed and honest words.  Time to take the spirit of Oath night and make it something I do all night long.

Morning Routine:

  1. Review Nine Noble Virtues (NNV) and Principles
  2. Meditate on the Virtues
  3. Review Goals
  4. Review Bucket List
  5. Full Body Stretch
  6. Breakfast
  7. Supplements and Medicines
  8. Shower and Personal Hygiene
  9. Get Dressed for the Day

Solid.  I only really want to look at the meditation part and get a much more formalized way of doing it.

Bucket List:

  1. Go Back to Budapest, Hungary for a vacation.
  2. Get My Tattoos.
  3. Actually Get Drunk.
  4. Smoke a Joint.
  5. Hike the Northern Lakeshore Trail along the Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
  6. Write My Novel.
  7. Learn Latin.
  8. Learn Hungarian.
  9. Weightlifting – Bench 225 lbs, Squat 315 lbs, and Deadlift 405 lbs.
  10. Start my own business

Two things have to come off this list in the coming year. Finding out which ones is going to be the excitement of it.

Weightlifting:

Need to find a new gym but my employer keeps messing with my hours.  Finding a new job may be essential to getting back to weightlifting. I need the resources to get back to something I love doing and miss greatly.

The Rabyd Skald – Wandering Soul, Bard and Philosopher. The Grey Wayfarer.

Skaal!!!